After the Beige Incident™, Tajdin made a daring plan:
Lose the upcoming election.
If he could get voted out, he could stop being accidental Hitler and return to a world without beige nationalism.
His strategy was flawless:
Make speeches boring
Promote peace
Ban dramatic music at rallies
Replace flags with knitting patterns
Talk about sewage modernization (again)
On paper, political suicide.
In practice, Tajdin underestimated the German public's newfound obsession with order, pipes, and dramatically knitted national identity.
Destiny Interference Unit – Internal Memo
Puppet attempting escape via electoral means.
Countermeasure: Increase crowd enthusiasm by 14%.
Add orchestral swelling to boring speeches.
Ensure knitting gets interpreted as "cultural revitalization."
— Timeline Dept.
The Rallies
Tajdin: "We must reduce trade tariffs for agricultural goods—"
Crowd (chanting): "Agriculture! Power! Destiny!"
Tajdin: "Also, we should consider investing in wastewater management—"
Crowd (crying with patriotic joy): "For the Fatherland!"
Someone fainted out of civic pride.
Foreign observers scribbled nervously in notebooks.
Election Day
Tajdin waited for the sweet release of democracy.
He expected a graceful exit. A concession speech. Perhaps inventing Nintendo early.
Instead, the results rolled in:
Landslide victory.
Not even a polite landslide — a dramatic, beige-tinted landslide.
Newspapers called it a "Mandate for Modernization," which was the most romantic description of sewage reform in world history.
Destiny stamped progress:
TIMELINE CORRECTION: 57%
The Opposition Reacts
Most opposition leaders resigned, citing vague reasons like:
"Personal knitting commitments"
"Medical obligations involving prolonged sitting"
"Fear of beige"
One rival wrote a memoir titled On Second Thought, Leadership Is Hard.
Sales skyrocketed.
Tajdin's Meltdown
Tajdin slumped in his office chair.
"I literally tried to bore them into rejecting me," he muttered.
His secretary nodded sympathetically. "Sir, the people love decisiveness."
"I talked about sewage."
"Powerful sewage," she clarified.
Destiny Celebrates Quietly
Somewhere in the cosmic backend server-room of history, interns high-fived.
Historian A: "Election consolidation achieved."
Historian B: "Fear levels suboptimal but trending upward."
Historian A: "We can work with that."
They updated the board:
Q4 OBJECTIVE: Foreign Tension (Mild → Moderate)
Tajdin's New Strategy: Pacifism Via Bureaucracy
If he couldn't lose the election, he'd try plan B:
He would bore Europe into permanent peace.
A diplomatic masterstroke, in theory.
He scheduled summits with France, Britain, Italy, and the Soviet Union to discuss:
tariffs
railway schedules
grain pricing
fish quotas
mandatory tea breaks for international understanding
Diplomats, tragically, interpreted everything as veiled aggression.
Italians demanded "Biscuits of Destiny."
Brits whispered, "He's up to something."
French representatives sighed and smoked, the universal symbol for "This century again?"
Soviets stared like suspicious owls.
Destiny approved the confusion.
Progress rolled to:
TIMELINE CORRECTION: 63%