The train doors slid shut with a familiar chime, and just like that, I was on my way.
I stood near the door, one hand gripping the overhead strap, the other stuffed into my jacket pocket. The morning rush had already thinned out, but there were still enough people around to make the carriage feel full. Not crowded, not empty. That strange in between state. Kind of like my head right now.
Saki had left early.
She'd texted me in the morning, something short and casual. "I had to head out early. Let's meet at the station like we planned!"
Simple. Normal. And yet, for some reason, it stuck with me more than it should have.
Usually, we walked together. Our houses were right next to each other, and it had become such a routine that not doing it felt… off. Not bad. Just different. Like wearing shoes on the wrong feet. They still worked, but you noticed.
The train lurched forward, the city sliding past the windows in a blur of buildings, alleyways, and convenience stores. I watched my reflection flicker on the glass. Same face. Same messy hair I'd failed to tame even after my mom told me twice. Still, I adjusted my collar anyway, out of habit.
Why am I even this nervous?
It's just the mall.
With Saki.
Alone.
I exhaled slowly.
Yesterday replayed itself in my mind without permission. Her message. My brother's grin. That stupid comment about girlfriends. I could still hear his voice, teasing and knowing, like he saw something I didn't. Or worse, something I was pretending not to see.
I shifted my weight as the train slowed for the next station. A few people got off. A few more stepped in. Somewhere across the aisle, a couple was quietly arguing over what sounded like lunch plans. Normal stuff. Everyday stuff.
So why did this feel different?
I pulled my phone out again, checking the time. Still early. We'd agreed to meet near the ticket gates, close to the bakery that always smelled unfairly good. She'd probably be there already. Saki was punctual like that. Not strict, but reliable. The kind of person who arrived five minutes early and pretended she hadn't.
The thought made me smile before I could stop myself.
I wondered what she was doing right now. Standing there, maybe checking her phone, maybe pretending not to look around for me. Or maybe she was completely relaxed, not overthinking anything at all. That sounded more like her.
The train rattled onward.
I tried to distract myself by thinking about literally anything else. Badminton. Practice. Riku's calm voice correcting my footwork. My brother watching from the side, saying nothing but somehow saying everything. Even Aoi briefly crossed my mind, only to be pushed aside just as quickly.
Today wasn't about that.
This was… different.
Another station announcement echoed through the carriage. My stop was coming up. My grip on the strap tightened without me realizing it. I straightened up, rolling my shoulders once like I was about to step onto a court instead of a platform.
Get it together.
As the train slowed, my heart started doing that annoying thing where it sped up for no real reason. I told myself it was just anticipation. Or hunger. Or caffeine withdrawal. Anything normal.
The doors opened.
Warm air rushed in along with the noise of the station. I stepped out, moving with the flow of people, then slowed as I cleared the platform. The sounds blended together. Footsteps. Announcements. Distant music from someone's headphones.
I glanced around instinctively, even though I knew she wouldn't be here yet. Not on the platform. Still, my eyes searched anyway.
Nothing.
Good. That meant I had time to breathe.
I followed the signs toward the ticket gates, weaving through the crowd. The smell of baked bread hit me the moment I reached the main hall. Yep. The bakery. Right on cue. My stomach betrayed me with a quiet growl.
Focus.
I checked my phone one more time. No new messages. That was fine. More than fine. Everything was going exactly as planned.
And yet, as I leaned against one of the pillars near the meeting spot, scanning the entrance, I felt that familiar flutter in my chest again.
I didn't know what today would turn into. I didn't know if this outing would change anything or stay exactly the same.
But as I waited there, surrounded by strangers, one thought stayed clear.
I really hoped she'd smile when she saw me.
I checked the time again. Still a few minutes to spare.
Saki wasn't late. I knew that. If anything, I was early. But standing still made my thoughts louder, so I pushed myself off the pillar and started walking.
The station was busy in that relaxed weekend way. No rushing crowds, no panicked announcements. Just people moving because they wanted to, not because they had to. Couples walked side by side. A kid tugged at his dad's sleeve, pointing excitedly at a gachapon machine. Somewhere nearby, a street musician was playing softly, the notes blending into the station noise instead of standing out.
I slowed my pace, pretending to be interested in everything around me while very clearly not looking for one specific person.
I passed the bakery again. The smell was unfair. Warm bread, sugar, something buttery. I considered buying something, then imagined trying to eat while talking and immediately scrapped the idea. That would be a disaster waiting to happen.
I wandered past a row of shops selling phone cases, keychains, random souvenirs no one really needed. I stopped for a second, picked up a keychain shaped like a tiny shuttlecock, then put it back just as quickly.
Badminton brain. Always there. Always judging me.
I circled back toward the meeting spot, careful not to look like I was circling back toward the meeting spot. Subtlety. Very important. I leaned against a railing this time and watched people come up the stairs from the platforms below.
Not her.
Not her.
Definitely not her.
I sighed and rubbed the back of my neck. Waiting was worse than training. At least during practice, exhaustion drowned out overthinking. Here, my brain had too much free time.
My phone buzzed in my pocket.
For half a second, my heart jumped. Then I pulled it out and saw it was just a notification from a game reminding me about a daily login reward.
I stared at the screen. "…Now is not the time," I muttered, stuffing the phone away.
That's when I noticed the vending machines near the far wall. Bright lights, colorful buttons, rows of drinks lined up like they were showing off. Cold coffee, juice, soda, sports drinks. Suddenly, I realized I was thirsty.
Yeah. A drink would help. Totally normal reason to walk over there.
I headed toward the machines, digging my hands into my pockets as I walked. The machines hummed softly, one of them rattling as someone's drink dropped into the tray. I scanned the options, pretending this was a very serious decision.
Sports drink? Too much like practice.
Coffee? Might make me jittery.
Juice? Safe. Probably.
I pressed the button for a citrus drink and reached into my pocket for my purse. It was one of those small coin purses my mom insisted I use because "cash is still important." I flipped it open and tilted it slightly.
And that's when everything went wrong.
The coins didn't slide out nicely.
They escaped.
A sharp clatter echoed as several coins spilled from my hands, bouncing off the vending machine, the floor, my shoe. One rolled farther than the rest, spinning like it had somewhere very important to be.
I froze for half a second, staring at the mess.
"…You've got to be kidding me."
I crouched down immediately, scrambling to grab them before they rolled under the machine or someone stepped on them. My fingers fumbled, nerves making me clumsier than usual. One coin slipped just out of reach, tapping against the floor mockingly.
Why does this always happen at the worst moments?
I grabbed another coin, then another, stuffing them back into the purse without counting. I reached farther for the runaway coin, stretching awkwardly—
And then someone stepped into my field of view.
I paused, still crouched, holding two coins in my hand.
Great. Of course someone had to see this.
I straightened up slightly, coins clenched, feeling heat creep up my neck. All I could think was how ridiculous I must look, kneeling in front of a vending machine like it had personally betrayed me.
I let out a small, embarrassed laugh under my breath.
So much for looking cool while waiting.
I stood there, purse half open, hoping the ground would swallow the moment whole before Saki showed up and witnessed any of it.
I was just about to give up on the last coin.
It had rolled farther than the others and now sat there near the edge of the vending machine, completely out of reach unless I flattened myself on the floor like I was searching for lost treasure. I leaned forward anyway, stretching my arm, fingers grazing the cold tile.
Then a shadow fell over it.
Before I could react, a hand reached down, picked up the coin with ridiculous ease, and held it out in front of me.
"Looking for this?"
I froze.
Slowly, very slowly, I lifted my head.
Saki was standing there.
Of course she was.
She had that familiar calm smile on her face, the kind that made it look like this was the most natural thing in the world. Like she hadn't just caught me in my lowest possible state: crouched on the floor, surrounded by vending machines, clutching loose change like my life depended on it.
My brain short circuited.
"…Oh," I said. Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant first word. "Uh. Yeah."
She handed me the coin, her fingers brushing mine just slightly. I snatched it a little too quickly and almost dropped it again, which would have ended me on the spot.
"Thanks," I added, forcing myself to stand up as fast as possible without falling over.
She glanced at the vending machine, then at my half open purse. "So this is how you spend your time while waiting for people?"
I groaned. "You were supposed to see me leaning coolly against a wall. Not… whatever this was."
She laughed. Not a polite laugh. A real one. The kind that made her eyes soften and her shoulders relax.
"I thought you said you'd be here early," she said.
"I was," I replied immediately. "Then the coins betrayed me."
She tilted her head. "The coins?"
"They attacked first," I said seriously. "I was just defending myself."
She covered her mouth, trying to hold back her smile. "Sure. That makes sense."
I finally managed to tuck the coins safely back into the purse, double checking the zipper like it had personally wronged me. I glanced at the vending machine again. "I was trying to buy a drink before you got here. Keyword being trying."
"Well," she said, stepping closer to the machine, "mission failed successfully."
I sighed. "You're never letting this go, are you?"
"Absolutely not," she replied without hesitation.
I pressed the button again, this time very carefully, and fed the machine a single coin like it was a wild animal. The machine accepted it. Progress.
As we waited for the drink to drop, Saki crossed her arms and looked around the station. "I was worried I might be late."
"You're not," I said quickly. "I mean, even if you were, I'd probably still be… dealing with this."
Right on cue, the machine made a loud thunk and the bottle fell into the tray.
"Victory," I muttered, pulling it out.
Saki smiled at me, then glanced at the machine again. "You know, I could've helped you pick up the coins too."
"I know," I said. "But if you'd seen all of it, I'd have to move to another city."
She laughed again. "Relax. I only saw the dramatic finale."
We started walking away from the vending machines, falling into step naturally. For a moment, neither of us said anything. The awkwardness from earlier faded, replaced by something lighter. Comfortable.
"So," she said casually, "you came alone because I left early, right?"
"Yeah," I replied. "Felt weird, honestly. I kept thinking I forgot something."
She glanced at me. "Like me?"
I nearly choked on my drink.
"I— I meant the route," I said quickly. "The route felt weird."
She raised an eyebrow. "Mm hmm."
We reached the exit gates and stopped for a second, people flowing around us like water around stones. I took another sip of my drink, suddenly very aware of how close she was standing.
"You always get into trouble when I'm not around?" she asked.
I thought about it for a moment. Coins. Vending machine. Mild public humiliation.
"…Apparently," I said.
She smiled at that, softer this time. "Good thing I showed up then."
Yeah, I thought, as we stepped forward together.
Good timing.
We stepped out of the station together, the noise fading into that open, airy hum malls always have. The glass doors slid shut behind us, and suddenly there were bright signs, distant music, and the low chatter of people starting their day.
I took another sip of my drink and, before I could overthink it, asked, "So… can I ask you something?"
Saki glanced at me. "Depends. Is it another question about coins?"
"Hey," I said, defensive. "That was a one time incident."
"Mmm," she replied, clearly unconvinced. "Go on."
"Why did you invite me to the mall today?" I asked. I tried to make it sound casual. I did not succeed. "I mean, not that I'm complaining. Just… curious."
She slowed her steps a little, hands clasped behind her back as she walked. "You're overthinking already."
"I am not."
"You are," she said immediately. "Your eyebrows do this thing."
I frowned. "They do not do a thing."
She smiled. "They really do."
I sighed. "Fine. Maybe a little."
She looked ahead for a moment, then shrugged lightly. "I just wanted to go out. And you were free. That's all."
"That's all?" I repeated.
She glanced sideways at me. "What were you expecting? A dramatic confession under the mall lights?"
My face heated up instantly. "No! I just meant— you don't usually invite me out like this."
"That's true," she said. "But you don't usually drop all your money on the floor either. New things are happening."
I groaned. "You promised you wouldn't bring that up again."
"I promised nothing," she said cheerfully.
We passed a clothing store with mannequins dressed way too confidently for my liking. I avoided eye contact with them on principle. The mall was already getting busier. Families, couples, groups of friends laughing too loudly. Somewhere nearby, a claw machine beeped aggressively, probably stealing someone's money.
"So," I said, trying to regain control of the conversation, "this isn't some secret plan, right?"
She stopped walking.
I stopped too, immediately panicking. Did I say something wrong?
She leaned in slightly, lowering her voice. "Haruto."
"Yes?"
"If I had a secret plan," she said seriously, "do you really think I'd invite you?"
"…Wow."
She laughed and started walking again before I could recover. I scrambled to follow. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"It means," she said, "you're terrible at secrets. You'd panic in five minutes."
"That's not true," I said. "I can be calm."
She looked at me. "You dropped coins because you were thirsty."
"That was unrelated!"
She smiled like she'd won something.
We reached the main corridor, sunlight streaming in through the glass ceiling. I noticed how everything felt brighter. Or maybe I was just paying attention more. Posters for movies, sale banners, the smell of popcorn drifting from somewhere deeper inside.
I glanced at Saki again. She looked relaxed. Comfortable. Like this wasn't a big deal at all.
"So you just… wanted to hang out?" I asked.
"Yeah," she said simply. "Is that weird?"
"No," I replied quickly. "I mean— no. It's not weird."
She nodded. "Good."
We walked a bit more, and I noticed a small smile creeping onto my face without permission. I cleared my throat. "You know, my brother would definitely say this looks suspicious."
Her eyes lit up. "Your brother? The one who teases you?"
"Yes. That one."
She leaned closer, lowering her voice like she was sharing a secret. "What would he say?"
"That I'm on a date."
She stopped again.
I stopped too. "I mean— not that this is a date. It's obviously not. I'm just saying that's what he'd say."
She looked at me for a long second, then smiled slowly. "Relax. I know it's not a date."
"Oh," I said. "Good."
Then she added, "Unless you keep acting this nervous."
"…I'm not nervous."
She raised an eyebrow.
I sighed. "Okay. Maybe a little."
She laughed softly and started walking again. "Don't worry. I invited you because you're easy to be around."
That hit harder than I expected.
I looked away quickly, pretending to be very interested in a directory sign. "Yeah. You too."
She didn't tease me that time. She just smiled and let the moment sit there between us, light and warm, as we headed deeper into the mall together.
I kept glancing back.
Not obviously. At least, I hoped not. Just quick looks over my shoulder, like I'd forgotten something important. Which I had. A manga. Sitting on a shelf. Probably judging me.
I sighed.
"You're still thinking about it, aren't you?" Saki said.
"I'm not," I replied immediately.
She didn't even look at me. "You are."
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because you're walking like you left your soul behind."
"That's dramatic," I muttered. "I just… want to make sure I made the right decision."
She stopped walking.
I stopped too, my heart skipping like I'd been caught doing something illegal.
She turned to face me, hands on her hips. "Haruto."
"Yes?"
"You chose the game," she said. "That was your decision."
"I know."
"And yet," she continued, "you look like someone who just turned down free food."
"That's different," I said. "This was a limited edition."
She sighed deeply, like a disappointed teacher. "Your self control is terrible."
"I had self control," I protested. "I walked away."
"You walked away physically," she corrected. "Mentally, you're still in aisle three."
I opened my mouth to argue, then closed it.
…Okay, that was fair.
We resumed walking, the mall growing louder as we moved deeper inside. My brain, however, refused to move on. Images of crisp pages and cover art kept flashing uninvited. I imagined someone else buying the last copy right now. Some random guy who didn't even appreciate the story properly.
Pain.
"I could always buy it next time," I said out loud.
"No," Saki said instantly.
"I didn't even finish the sentence."
"I know where it was going."
I scratched my cheek. "Just saying. It's an option."
"It is not," she said firmly. "If you buy manga every time you see one, you'll never buy that game."
"I don't buy manga every time."
She looked at me.
I looked away.
"…Often," I admitted.
She laughed. "You're hopeless."
We passed a few more stores. Shoes. Accessories. Things I didn't understand the prices of. I was just starting to calm down when Saki suddenly stopped again.
This time, she didn't scold me.
She was staring at a clothing store.
Bright lights, wide entrance, mannequins dressed in light summer outfits. Soft colors. Flowing fabrics. A huge sign near the entrance read SUMMER COLLECTION like it was shouting.
"Oh," she said. "This one."
Before I could ask what that meant, she grabbed my wrist.
"Huh— wait— Saki?"
Too late.
I was dragged inside.
Cool air hit my face immediately, along with the faint scent of perfume and fabric. The store was spacious, racks neatly arranged, mirrors lining the walls. A few customers browsed quietly, completely unaware that I had just been abducted.
Saki finally let go of my wrist and turned to me. "I need summer clothes."
"Okay," I said. "Why am I involved?"
She smiled innocently. "Moral support."
"I don't know anything about clothes."
"That's fine," she said. "You're here to carry opinions."
"That sounds dangerous."
She ignored that and started browsing through a rack of tops, pulling one out and holding it up against herself, checking the mirror. "What do you think?"
I panicked.
"It's… uh… nice?"
She glanced at me. "Nice how?"
"Nice… color?"
She squinted. "You're terrible at this."
"I warned you!"
She laughed and moved on, grabbing another top. "This one?"
I tilted my head, trying to actually look this time. "That one's better."
"Better how?"
"…It looks comfortable?"
She stared at me.
I felt sweat form. "And it suits you," I added quickly.
She smiled, clearly pleased. "See? You're learning."
I relaxed slightly, hands shoved into my pockets as I followed her between racks. It was strange. Just walking around like this. Normal. Casual. The kind of thing I never really did.
She picked up a light jacket next, then a skirt, then another top. Every now and then, she'd hold something up and wait for my reaction.
Whenever I hesitated too long, she'd tease me. Whenever I answered too fast, she'd tease me more.
"You're thinking too hard," she said at one point.
"I don't want to mess up."
"It's clothes," she replied. "Not a life decision."
I thought about the bookstore.
"…Right."
She glanced at me and smiled knowingly. "Still thinking about it?"
"…Maybe."
She laughed softly. "You really are something."
As she headed toward the fitting rooms, clothes draped over her arm, she looked back at me. "Wait here."
I nodded, standing awkwardly near a mirror, watching her disappear behind the curtain.
Somehow, being dragged into a clothing store felt easier than walking past that bookstore.
And that realization confused me more than anything else.