It was just like any other day. Wake up, workout, take a bath, read books, breakfast and go to college. After that is what I consider the beginning of a day, because that's when I get to do what I want.
I go to Muay Thai classes right after college, then hit home. My parents and siblings were out of town today so I decided to cook a poison to kill my neighbor's dog. That dog loves taking a dump in my garden, the owner of that dog is just as autistic as his dog. He refuses to clean his dog's shit.
(Author note: Muay Thai is a martial art similar to kickboxing)
That justifies why the dog should be past-tensed. I never liked dogs anyway.
I ran home from the Muay Thai class as the idea of cooking a poison got me feeling like the dude from breaking bad. "Jesse, it's time to cook!" I told myself as I flung my house door open. I was so excited that I forgot to close the door, too bad I had to stop to remove my shoes, I want to get to the cooking part already.
Keeeng
-shuk
That was the sound of the main door closing and locking. Funny. I don't remember closing it, no one's back home either. Could it be an intruder?
Maybe a burglary? It would be more convenient to think that way, because this scenario is something that all martial artists dream of.
I don't care who it is anymore, the person behind me could even be a delivery guy, but there's no more going back!
I whipped out a back kick with full force. The person behind me caught it.
Impossible- I thought. I shook my leg to release it from the intruder's grip and put some distance between us.
This is bad. If my eyes aren't deceiving me, I'm stuck in one hell of a bad situation.
The thought of fighting someone always sounded entertaining to me, because I'm good at fighting. But no matter how you look at it, fighting a tall grown man cosplaying an angel sounds scary. Shit- how is that halo above his head even floating!
I've got no choice but to fight him. He caught a back kick with little to no effort and considering his size, I'm at a disadvantage.
The muscular guy in front of me was at least 6 foot 5. What's more scary is that he's dressed like a frikkin' angel and has been staring at my soul with a serious expression.
He took a long step forward. I whipped a spinning hook kick. The kick missed the target, it was meant to miss the target, my untied shoe came off my leg which I used to kick and hit the face of the intruder. It pushed him back a little bit.
I grabbed the fire extinguisher above the shoe rack and swung it at his head with full force.
Tung!
Weird. For some reason, it sounded like a clash between two metallic surfaces. Anyway, the intruder was down. My heart was about to climb my throat and jump out of my mouth- it was beating at a dangerous rate.
I need to call the police, hope the weirdo is still alive.
Just as I was about to take a step, he started to move. He was getting back up.
"Grh... you little-"
I couldn't process what's going on, my mind fell into panic, but my body was fast to react. I instinctively swung the fire extinguisher straight down on his head.
He effortlessly caught it. His grip was firm, I couldn't pull it back for another swing, so I opened the fire extinguishers lock and sprayed it all over him, hoping to slow him down.
Then I turned in the opposite direction and ran like a mad man. When I turned back, I saw death. The angel looked like the angel of death, he was flying towards me at full speed with an expression that read "come here you little shit".
I took a sharp left turn into the kitchen just as he caught me. The momentum of the turn violently flung him onto the gas stove at the end of the kitchen. He was placed on the gas stove like a sacrifice in a ritual.
No matter how much damage he takes, he still gets up. I wasn't going to let him recover. I leapt across the kitchen and landed a knee kick on his face. I drove my knee into his face with the intention of putting a hole in his face. The impact of the knee kick cause his head to violently hit the tile padded wall behind him and break some of the tiles.
I wasn't gonna stop there, while he's still dizzy, I grabbed his face and pushed it against the stove's burner.
Click
I turned the stove on. I could literally hear his flesh sizzling. But wait- that's not the smell of burning flesh!
He started to apply more resistance against my grip, he managed to get both his feet on the ground, my grip was weakening, so I jumped on his back and pressed his face against the stove harder.
"...aaaaaAAAAA!"
He started shouting, but weirdly, he wasn't physically resisting much. Suddenly, I felt something move, I was practically hugging him from the backside so I could see what he was trying.
I felt it again, something on his back started moving fast and he started resisting more.
He slowly started to rise and I rose along with him as I was on his back.
I wasn't strong enough to push his head against the stove so I switched to choking him instead.
What the heck is this weird feeling? Something is wrong, well everything today has been wrong but I have a feeling that I'm gonna get screwed.
Before I realized, I was flying. Actually, I was hanging onto someone who was flying.
The angel flew straight up and dashed against the ceiling. I obviously took all the impact. The angel constantly pushed me against the ceiling. It was a clever way of choking me, whereas my choke didn't seem like it was having any effect.
"Gah!"
I was starting to lose consciousness. Desperate times call for desperate measures. I took a big bite out of his wings, it was a big chunk.
"Aaah! You stupid brat!"
He loosened up his choke. I took advantage of my freedom of movement to pull his long hair with all the strength I've got. In a panic, he flew into a wall.
We both fell, I gouged one his eye out before darting back, doing my best to put some distance between us.
I noticed another fire extinguisher next to me. I don't know what kind of expression I had on my face until now, but after finding an extinguisher, my expression curled into a nasty grin.
I marched towards the barely conscious angel and just as I was about deliver a devastating blow to the head-
"Wait! We need to talk."
"I'm starting to hear things?"
"No shit we need to talk and you aren't hearing things!"
"We're beyond the point of talking. You shouldn't have attacked me. I bet you're a devil sent by the 'Lalilulelo' who's disguised as an angel."
"Listen up, I'm an angel called Zefith who is in charge of sending your soul to another world because your birth was an accident, you're not supposed to exist in this world."
"No! You're lying. Plus stop using it as an excuse to insult me"
The angel who was on his knee got back on his foot
"I should have just sent Truck-kun after you..."
"What are you mumbling about?!"
The angel Zefith took advantage of my confusion and threw an upper cut towards my jaw. I foresaw the punch and leaned back a little. Zefith's punch hit the fire extinguisher, which sent it flying upwards before getting stuck on the ceiling.
Once again, I instinctively attacked him. I grabbed the halo above his head and pushed it down till his neck, it was slightly elastic for some reason. I kicked his leg to get him down on his knees and got behind him while still holding onto the halo.
I tried to choke him again. The heat of the moment made me forget that choking won't work on him.
He hit me with a backwards head bud, that was all he needed to knock me out.
I slumped to the ground, my consciousness slowly faded to black.