"The game needs twenty-six cards since each girl takes out six. Is Shizuka correct, Sunbae?"
I nod.
Sohee grabs the deck, looking for something. "But… There are only two Jokers."
Just before Sohee suggests something, Shizuka speaks. "'Two Jokers.' That is what Sunbae said. Or maybe Sunbae wishes to take that back?"
"No."
If I take it back, they have a reason to back down from the game.
I'm not that worried, but Sohee is.
She leaps to my ear, whispering loudly. "Sunbae, this is a losing game."
"Is there any chance that I win?"
"... Yeah, but…"
Maybe seeing my face not reacting to her words, Sohee moves closer. "Sunbae. It's point three percent. You can't gamble with that kind of probability."
0.3%? I know it would be low, but to hear the exact number... Damn.
Also, are you a living calculator? You find the math that quick? Impressive, my pink-headed friend.
"Do you believe in fate, Sohee?"
"I…"
"I do."
Actually, I don't.
But if saying this kind of thing makes Sohee a little bit better, I will do it.
"You might want to go to that side, Sohee."
"I pray that you win, Sunbae."
"I'm a lucky guy, Sohee."
After saying that, she walks away and sits on the couch beside Nelly.
I am all alone now.
I miss her smell already.
"So, should we start?"
"Sure."
It begins.
Sohee shuffles the cards on top of her fingers.
She isn't very good with her hands.
But maybe she's not all there in the first place; that's why they are deliberate.
Almost as if she is hesitating.
The moment passes, and her hands are a lot calmer.
Her pink eyes glossed over.
I guess now we know she's not that kind of person.
Fwap.
Cards are being placed face down on the table and sound like a gunshot.
Fwap.
And that was the last card.
All the cards are in place.
Ready to be taken.
All eyes are on me again, making sure I'm not doing anything but waiting.
"Shizuka will gladly be the first."
Breaking the silence, the first one to choose her cards is Shizuka.
Six cards in her hand, but she doesn't even glance at them.
Next is Nelly.
"Um… uh…"
Every time she takes a card, she turns to Sohee as if asking for it first.
Sohee tries to nod each time she does that.
Varrie's turn.
And done.
She was very quick, picking up the cards without thinking.
Eight cards on the table.
Sohee reaches out for a card.
"Please don't be joker, please don't be joker…"
Then take one more.
And another.
The table is a lot tidier now with only two cards on it.
Those are my cards.
I look up at the girls.
Varrie seems frustrated.
Shizuka is still smiling.
Nelly… Well, I can't make anything out of her since I couldn't really see her face.
She is trembling, though, but she always is.
Sohee… is a little happier looking at her cards.
Great.
"Shizuka likes this game," she says, almost singing.
Those dark eyes are still creeping around my face.
As if she wouldn't want to miss what happens to it.
I want to prove her wrong.
"Go on Sunbae. Does fate really want him to win?"
Sohee stares hard at the last cards, now muttering a different mantra.
I reach for it.
I can almost hear Sohee gulping.
No, that was Varrie.
My hand flips the card.
And it is:
A joker.
Sohee pumps her fist.
Varrie curses silently.
Shizuka chuckles, "Let's see the next one."
My finger touches the last unflipped card.
Fwap.
Flipped it open, I did.
Something laughed coming from her direction.
But it isn't Shizuka.
She's just holding the source.
Her face flushes a little.
Her breath rags.
She wasn't lying.
She really likes this game.
Between two of her slender fingers, It's the other joker.
I have lost.
The last card was a seven of spades.
Feels like shit.
Shouldn't have put hope in luck.
Should have known better.
I think Varrie is saying something.
I can't understand her.
Words are reaching me from very far away.
Rings~
The others begin to leave, not wanting to spend another moment with a loser.
*
The red couch in front is empty.
"Sunbae?"
Sohee's voice.
"Sunbae."
I blink and find her sitting beside me again. Her hand is on my shoulder.
The others are gone.
Sohee and I are alone in the room.
For now.
I keep glancing at the door.
Waiting for a certain nurse or middle schooler to come in.
What's this time, a knife, a scalpel, a pencil?
Could be anything.
Man, I wish I could reset.
"I'm sorry, Sunbae, I really do."
Her hand on top of my shoulder.
Her skin alone is warmer than my blood.
I grab her hand.
She is really cute.
Her plump, peachy pink lips are trembling like it's begging to be kissed—maybe more.
I thought that, but I don't think I'll do it.
"It's not the end of the world, Sunbae. There is always next time. Next month. The girl's opinion could change by then. Even though we failed, I am still so proud of—sunbae…"
Her pink eyes are wide open. "Sunbae your eyes…"
"Hm? What's wrong?"
You know my eyes are starting to itch all of the sudden.
"They are very red all of a sudden."
"They are?"
I'm not going to cry, right?
No, I'm not. This is something else entirely.
Sohee seems to know that.
Her legs spring up.
Both her hands are yanks mine.
"S— Sunbae! Let's go
"Now!"
Her voice's wavering.
"What's wrong, Sohee?"
Drip.
Something running out of my eyes to my cheek and dropping on my hand.
A red liquid.
Blood.
Oh… lots of it. In fact, it's spilling out now.
"Sunbae!" She cries.
Damn, I dizzy.
Thud.
Can't control body.
I fell.
Head hit table.
Darkness.
Sunbae. That was the last word I heard.
*
1st Loop: 4th
*
Damn. I died.
Again.