Chapter 25: new days, old thoughts
Jay's POV
Morning again. Alarm again. My brain again questioning why I exist before 8 a.m.
I rolled over, squinting at the light sneaking through the blinds. The weather app said sunny, but it looked more like cloudy with a chance of "please let me sleep five more minutes."
Aries: "Jay! We're gonna be late!"
Jay: "Five minutes!"
Aries: "You said that ten minutes ago!"
Classic morning routine.
I finally dragged myself out of bed, brushed my hair into a messy ponytail, grabbed my uniform, and hurried downstairs. Mom was on her laptop, coffee in hand, talking about client emails like it was the most thrilling thing in the world.
Mom: "Eat something before you run off."
Jay: "I'm eating, I'm eating."
Aries: "That's literally one bite of toast."
Jay: "It counts."
He rolled his eyes and went back to scrolling through his phone. I could see a smile tugging at his lips though — he liked pretending to be the responsible sibling.
The drive to school was quiet. Music played on the radio, something slow and old, like the universe was teasing me with love songs I didn't want to hear.
At school, Marcus waved from across the courtyard. Juice box, backpack half off, same grin. How does he even do mornings like that?
Marcus: "Jay-Jay! You look half-dead!"
Jay: "Thank you. I try."
Marcus: "Energy drink?"
Jay: "Nah, I'll survive. Probably."
We walked to first period together. The teacher droned about literary devices, and I tried not to fall asleep on my notebook. Marcus passed me a doodle halfway through — a sketch of a dinosaur holding coffee. I almost choked trying not to laugh.
By lunch, the day was already better.
We went to our usual bench under the tree. It had become our spot, the one place in this whole new world that felt familiar now.
Marcus: "So… tell me something about your old school that you actually miss."
Jay: "Hmm…" I thought for a second. "The courtyard. And Maya. And…" I hesitated. "Him."
He didn't need me to say the name.
Marcus just nodded. "Still thinking about Keifer?"
Jay: "Yeah. I mean, how do you just stop? We didn't even end properly. It's like… we pressed pause, and now I'm stuck."
Marcus: "Maybe time hit play again, Jay."
Jay: "Maybe. Or maybe time just forgot me."
He gave a soft smile, like he wanted to say more but didn't. Instead, he handed me his last fry.
Marcus: "You think too much, Jay-Jay. Eat. You'll feel better."
I smiled back, grateful. He had that way of grounding me without trying too hard.
After lunch we had group work — literature analysis. Somehow I got paired with Marcus and two other students. We worked quietly, throwing ideas around, laughing when our examples turned ridiculous. It felt normal. Like maybe I was learning to breathe again.
But every time I laughed, part of me wondered if Keifer would've smiled hearing it.
After school, Marcus walked me to the gate.
Marcus: "Hey, so there's this art fest next week. You coming?"
Jay: "Hmm… I'll think about it."
Marcus: "Think faster. I need someone to mock the sculptures with."
Jay: "We'll see."
He laughed and ruffled my hair — which earned him a death glare from me and a laugh from Aries, who was waiting by the car.
Aries: "You made a new friend, huh?"
Jay: "He's just a classmate."
Aries: "Mhm. That's what people say before they start writing initials in notebooks."
Jay: "Shut up, Aries."
That night, I lay on my bed, staring at the ceiling. The air felt too still, the world too quiet. I scrolled through my phone again — still no new messages from Keifer.
I thought about replying anyway, but what would I even say?
"I miss you?"
"Why didn't you trust me?"
"Do you still think about me when you can't sleep?"
Instead, I just wrote one thing in my notes app:
> "Moving on isn't forgetting. It's remembering without breaking."
Then I closed my phone and turned off the lights.
Somewhere between waking and sleep, I dreamed of that rainy afternoon again — his voice, his touch, his stupid smirk, the way he whispered "Mariano" like it meant something.
When I woke up, my pillow was damp. I didn't know if it was rain from the dream or tears.
---
Keifer's POV
Days blur together. Classes. Practice. Work. Sleep. Repeat.
Everything's the same — except it isn't. Because she's not here.
Maya tells me she's "adjusting." That she's "fine."
But I know Jay — she pretends fine like it's a full-time job.
I keep her texts pinned, read them when I shouldn't, and sometimes, when the night gets too quiet, I type out messages I'll never send.
> "I'm sorry."
"I still love you."
"Please come back."
But I never hit send.
Because what if she's already stopped waiting?