Inazuma — Tenshukaku
"General Kujou, come here a moment."
Yae Miko waved sweetly at Kujou Sara with a foxlike smile that screamed trouble.
Sara frowned slightly.
What was the Guuji up to now?
She glanced at the Shogun—
Ei was silent, unmoving.
So Sara reluctantly walked over.
"Guuji, do you require something?"
"Oh, nothing serious~"
Miko covered her lips in a dainty laugh.
"Just that Ei handed me a little gift earlier."
She lifted a hand—
and pulled from her sleeve…
a Raiden Shogun figurine.
"The Sacred Statue of Her Excellency, the Almighty Narukami Ogosho!"
Sara's eyes widened instantly.
But then she recalled her passionate rant in the group chat earlier,
and embarrassment hit her like a lightning bolt.
Miko's smile sharpened.
"You like it, yes?"
"I already have one~
If you want it… I can give it to you."
"LIKE!!"
Sara answered without hesitation.
To hesitate even a second would be disrespect toward the Shogun!
Miko nodded.
"Of course. It's yours.
But—"
Her fox-eyes narrowed mischievously.
"Say 'The beautiful and brilliant Guuji Yae.'"
"The beautiful and brilliant Guuji Yae!
Thank you for this gift!"
Before Miko could react, Sara snatched up the figurine with both hands,
turned, bowed deeply to Ei—
and returned to her seat in one swift, dignified motion.
Clean, efficient, loyal—
as expected of the Shogun's hound.
Miko: "…"
…She may have miscalculated.
But she didn't dwell on it.
The figurine was always meant for Sara anyway—Ei had simply told her to pass it along.
The real fun was still ahead—
the revelation of "Liyue's Thunder Archon."
Miko's eyes returned to the light-screen, gleaming with expectation.
Ei and Sara looked up as well.
Blue Star — Villa
Arthur clicked to play the next video.
He didn't show gameplay footage—
the damage numbers would be too awkward to explain.
The video began.
Light-Screen Footage — Tenshukaku
La Signora knelt on the floor, clutching her chest, eyes full of disbelief.
"Your power…
Why…?!"
Paimon huffed coldly.
Lumine turned back with a blank expression—
worn sword in hand, eyes icy.
[Transcendent Chat Group]
Ayaka: Huh? Isn't that the Shogun's Tenshukaku?
Signora: Tenshukaku? Why would I be there?
Lumine: You didn't just "go there." You even fought me! And lost! Lol!
Paimon: Hehe! Lumine is awesome!
Childe: Tsk tsk. Weak.
Scaramouche: Pathetic.
Keqing: And me? Where am I in all this?
Ganyu: Should appear soon…
…
Goth Grand Hotel
Signora sat on a chair, arms crossed.
"So I must have been following Her Majesty's orders…
then something happened and I fought the Traveler…
and lost."
It was the only conclusion.
She exhaled.
Enough guesswork.
She continued watching.
Light-Screen Footage
Footsteps echoed.
A figure descended from the throne, holding Musou no Hitotachi.
Paimon and Lumine turned toward the sound—
And then—
Keqing entered the screen.
Sword in hand.
Expression cold as thunder.
The Liyue Thunder Archon.
Transcendent Chat Group
Keqing: ???
Ei: ???
Sara: W-why?! That should be the Shogun! Why is it Lady Keqing?!
Jean: So that's what "Liyue Thunder Archon" meant…
Hu Tao: Ahhhhh— I thought too much.
Venti: Ehe~ did you think it was a "Liyue branch office" of the Electro Archon?
Hu Tao: …maybe.
Paimon: Wait! Raiden Sh—no, Liyue Thunder Archon Keqing, why are you holding a sword like that?!
Lumine: Don't tell me she's here to chop us…?
Furina: Or maybe she's chopping the Fatui?
Signora: Impossible! I am a diplomatic envoy!
Sara: Whoever disrespects the Shogun must DIE.
Lumine: …
Keqing: …
…
Light-Screen Footage Continues
Lumine raised her sword defensively.
But Keqing ignored her and walked straight past—
heading toward the kneeling Signora.
"I am the Emissary of Snezhnaya!"
Signora staggered up, panicked.
"If you dare lift a blade against me—!"
Her voice trembled.
"Snezhnaya will ensure your precious Inazuma—!"
She kept retreating, desperation rising.
"STOP!!
I order you—!!"
Keqing didn't slow.
Her expression cold, but her back flared—
Three Raiden-style magatamas of lightning appeared.
Her aura surged violently.
Signora shrieked.
"You— all of you—!
Why— why me—!"
Then she lunged in a final act of madness.
A flash of violet light.
Musou-level swordlight cleaved through the hall.
Keqing stepped past her—
without looking back.
Signora evaporated into pure ash.
Transcendent Chat Group
Paimon: WAAAAH thank goodness she wasn't after us!
Lumine: This is the Liyue Thunder Archon?! She one-shot an Executive! I LOVE it!
Zhongli: According to common reason… this was indeed magnificent.
Neuvillette: If one did not know the truth, one might truly believe Lady Keqing to be an Archon.
Alice: Hehe.
Keqing: "Morax, I ascend to godhood!"
Zhongli: …
Keqing: Please stop, Miss Alice…
Venti: Didn't you want "human governance"? If you become the Thunder Archon, you can achieve it by yourself!
Yae Miko: Not bad, not bad. A hundred times better than a certain friend of mine. Forget Liyue's Thunder Archon—come to Inazuma as the real one!
Ei: …
Sara: Guuji! Do not insult the Shogun!
Miko: Ara? You accepted my gift just now and now you scold me?
Furina: Gift? What gift??
Sara: I can return it! But I cannot allow disrespect toward the Shogun!
Miko: Ara ara… so cruel…
Everyone: (eye roll)
This fox was truly the closest thing to the Traveler in terms of "pure mischief."
Light-Screen Footage — Ending
Keqing sheathed her blade without turning back.
"You are the enemy of Eternity."
Lumine nearly unsheathed her sword again.
But Keqing continued calmly:
"But I acknowledge your victory.
Therefore—
I permit you to leave Tenshukaku on your feet."
Video end.
Blue Star — Villa
The original meme video was titled:
[Liyue Thunder Archon slays the Raiden Shogun]
Signora was the Shogun.
Lumine was Yanfei.
Paimon was Klee.
But Arthur had modified it.
There were two reasons:
Too messy.
With so many role-swaps, Teyvat residents might get confused.
Too dangerous.
If people saw their own Archon killed—even as a joke—
Inazuma's extreme faith could explode.
He wanted humor and engagement, not riots.
So he simplified the cast.
Keqing alone was the "Thunder Archon."
Everyone else reverted to their real identities.
Signora?
She had been meme-killed countless times already.
One more wouldn't hurt.
Jade Chamber — Liyue
Keqing didn't speak.
She sat down, hand on chin, thinking.
A moment later—
Her eyes sparkled.
"I understand now!"
"Oh?"
Ningguang tapped her pipe.
"Has our Liyue Thunder Archon discovered something?"
Ganyu stayed silent, but her curved eyes betrayed amusement.
Keqing glared at them.
"It's not like that!"
"The 'Liyue Thunder Archon' isn't like Barbara's meme.
This one is a real future event."
"In that timeline, the Traveler visits Inazuma.
For some reason, they clash with Signora."
"And the one who delivered the final blow—
should be the Raiden Shogun."
"Keqing was just swapped in by the light-screen."
Ningguang and Ganyu nodded thoughtfully.
Indeed, that made sense.
Since it involved Snezhnaya and Inazuma,
Liyue naturally had no role in it.
But Ningguang smirked.
"No no, the Raiden Shogun is strong—
but our Keqing is hardly weaker."
"Now Liyue has its own Thunder Archon."
"With two gods—Geo and Lightning—who would dare bully us?"
Normally, Ningguang would never joke about gods.
But after seeing Ei's reactions in the group,
she realized the Shogun wasn't offended.
So she allowed herself a little teasing.
Ganyu nodded solemnly:
"Yes, Lady Ningguang is correct!"
Keqing flushed.
"You two—!!
Hmph!!"
If she really were an Archon—
the first thing she'd do is smite these two.
Meanwhile — Zhongli's Conclusion in the Chat
Lumine: So that's the future me and Paimon?
Paimon: But why do we fight Signora? And why would the Shogun kill her?
Ei: An Audience With the Almighty.
Nahida: What's that?
Sara: A sacred duel decreed by the Shogun.
Loser receives divine punishment.
Winner is granted a path forward.
Navia: Sounds like Fontaine's Duel Proxies.
Clorinde: …
Kazuha: I had a friend who once participated.
He lost. Sigh.
…
Goth Grand Hotel
Signora finally pieced it together.
"So that was it…"
"In the future, I opposed the Traveler.
We duelled before the Shogun.
I underestimated them.
I lost.
And the Shogun executed me."
She nodded slowly.
Makes sense.
Which meant—
To preserve her life,
she should avoid provoking the Traveler.
And avoid Inazuma entirely.
Stay. Far. Away.
Signora clenched her fists.
For the rest of her life—she would never set foot in Inazuma.
"I'll need to report this to Her Majesty immediately."
She quickly wrote a letter.
Some things were better not said in the group chat.
Transcendent Chat Group
Childe: I'll admit—Signora is bold. Threatening the Shogun like that?
Scaramouche: Indeed. Almost as bold as you stabbing the Geo Archon.
Childe: …
I said it's NOT ME!!
Diluc: Congratulations. One less Fatui.
Hu Tao: Should we prepare a funeral? I can offer a discount!
Chicken: Her sacrifice merits at least half a day of state mourning for Snezhnaya!
Signora: HEY!! I'M NOT DEAD!!
Scaramouche: Unfortunately.
Signora: Hmph! I will NEVER go to Inazuma again!!
Yae Miko: Liyue too~ After all, the one who beheaded you was Liyue's Thunder Archon.
Keqing: …
Please stop making this bigger…
Still—
Keqing couldn't deny it.
Seeing herself one-shot an Executive like a divine warrior…
It felt…
really cool.
Blue Star — Villa
Arthur chuckled as he watched the exploding chat.
Poor Signora—
they were already scheduling her funeral.
"Not bad…
one day, I'll show them Winter Night's Lazzo."
Many fans complained that Signora had "no presence" in that cutscene.
Fine!
He would give her a front-row seat at her own funeral.
Maximum immersion.
He turned back to the camera.
"One slash to defeat La Signora—the majesty of the Liyue Thunder Archon truly shines!"
"Next, we'll examine another side of our dear Keqing."
"Non-serious item number five—
Mixed Offal Chef Keqing!"
Jade Chamber
PFFFF!
Keqing was drinking water—
and spit it everywhere.
Her again??
Wait.
"Mixed Offal Chef"?
What kind of cursed title was THAT?!
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