"So… this bastard is doing cosplay?"
After calming down the white-haired girl, Kamishiro returned—only to find Iori completely stone-still.
That detached, beyond-worldly vibe, hugging his own head, made him look like a Roman statue. Except, with that pose, even Kamishiro couldn't figure out which statue he was trying to cosplay.
Also—wasn't this cosplay a bit inaccurate? Weren't Roman statues usually naked?
And here's Iori fully clothed!
What's the matter?
Was he shy about cosplaying? But he used to strip fast enough before!
For the sake of artistic expression, Kamishiro felt he should do something.
He handed Iori a piece of cloth. "Here, if you can't be fully nude, at least use this as a costume."
A piece of cloth was the most that Roman sculptures usually wore.
Of course, Kamishiro was just teasing. Iori was so stone-like he probably couldn't even grab the cloth.
Just as Kamishiro leaned in to drape the cloth over Iori's head and slip away…
Something unexpected happened!
"You scumbag! This is all your fault!"
Kamishiro's voice must have triggered something. At the sound of it, Iori instantly snapped out of his stone mode.
His eyes bloodshot, he pounced on Kamishiro like a madman.
{{(°△°; "}}!
Caught totally off guard, Kamishiro was tackled to the ground—hard. It felt like being hit by a truck.
And the truck had hands—hands now wrapped tightly around his neck!
"L-let go! What does this have to do with me?!"
Kamishiro struggled. He had no idea what was happening—he just got back!
"It's you! Because of you… I can't get a girlfriend!"
Iori, eyes red, didn't care about logic anymore. He was ready to send this scumbag straight to Satan!
Unfortunately for him he had picked the worst place to do it.
This was the cafeteria packed with Kamishiro's fans!
The moment Kamishiro went down, the white-haired girl burst onto the scene.
And with a flying kick, she sent Iori flying back into the cafeteria.
Then came the follow-up—
"Ahhh, not the face!!"
"Damn it! Kamishiro, you deserve to die!!!"
"Sis, I was wrong, don't hit my face!"
"Kamishiro, save me!"
Kamishiro rubbed his chest, fuming as the noisy voices rang in his ears.
He had nearly met his maker—damn it, doesn't this bastard know that college students can die easily?!
"Hit him! Beat him like your life depends on it!"
Standing off to the side, Kamishiro played the bully, using others' strength to assert dominance.
Now was the perfect time to show this idiot who ruled this place!
Hmph, once I become the principal, I'll make sure this fool repeats a few years!
Wait...
Making him repeat would ruin the school's image. I'll be the principal then, I need to think about the school.
Let's just expel him!
Thinking of that, Kamishiro's lips curled into a sinister smile, made all the more disturbing by the background of Iori's screams.
Off to the side, Kohei and the other two trembled in fear.
They were truly thankful—everything had happened too fast just now.
If it had been just a little slower, they would've joined in with some snarky comments…
and then they might have ended up getting beaten too...
As expected—
Kamishiro's fans are just as scary as him!
Yamamoto and Nojima silently swore to themselves that they would never, ever date a Kamishiro fan!
Too easy to end up like Mitarai!
…
Ten minutes later—
Iori, now tied up in shibari and looking like a pig's head and Kamishiro sat back in their seats.
"So… what exactly happened? I swear I didn't do anything!"
Kamishiro grumbled, visibly annoyed. He felt like he was being wronged on an astronomical level.
He had just tried to comfort a girl, and next thing he knew this idiot tackled him and started choking him without a word!
So unfair!
Feeling wronged, Kamishiro had beaten Iori for a full five minutes.
Hmph, don't people know his back's been acting up lately? He even got tired from beating him!
"There's no way you didn't do anything! You completely ruined my image!"
Hearing that, Iori's emotions flared again. Before college, he could at least hold a normal conversation with the convenience store clerk!
"Huh? No way, absolutely impossible," Kamishiro replied with total confidence. "Your image as a perverted nudist is so deeply rooted in people's minds, not even I could ruin it!"
Not even if I tried!
Hearing this—
Kohei and the other two silently gave him a thumbs up.
As expected of Kamishiro—he was a master of psychological warfare.
"Y-You!!!"
Iori finally lost it and started cursing loudly, only for Kamishiro to casually shove Kohei's bread into his mouth to shut him up.
Kohei stared dumbfounded at his now-empty hands. He had barely taken a couple bites out of that bread!
But what could he do? The one who snatched it was Kamishiro—the Demon King of the Cafeteria!
After seeing the pitiful state Iori was in, the three had completely given up any thought of resisting Kamishiro.
At least… not in this cafeteria!
"So what exactly happened?"
Having gotten nowhere with Kitahara, Kamishiro turned to Kohei and the others.
He was incredibly curious why this idiot blamed everything on him.
"Well, here's what happened…"
Kohei honestly recounted the whole situation.
The more Kamishiro listened, the more awkward his expression became.
(;?＿?)
This… this might actually have something to do with me.
Sure, even without me, Kitahara and Kohei—these two who could show up to class in nothing but boxers—would've become infamous at Izu University.
But… they probably wouldn't have gone viral so fast, and the fallout wouldn't be so widespread
As the realization sunk in, Kamishiro started feeling a bit guilty. He couldn't even look Kitahara in the eye.
No way!
I can't just leave it like this!
He felt like he had to do something—if not, he might be too guilty to eat!
Even missing just lunch would be tragic—his fans would be heartbroken!
If the problem seems like it's mine from the forum's perspective… maybe I just need to change perspectives!
His eyes lit up with an idea—he instantly thought of a new angle!
Kamishiro suddenly put on a regretful face and patted Kitahara on the shoulder.
"Sigh, Kitahara, yeah, maybe I was a little careless. But putting the facts aside—don't you think you might be at fault, too?"
!!!
"Mmmmmm!!!"
Kitahara had been hoping Kamishiro would have a conscience and apologize, but this was what he got instead?!
His eyes instantly turned bloodshot as he struggled furiously, muffled curses sounding through the bread.
Kamishiro didn't even need to remove the bread to imagine just how foul Kitahara's words were.
Damn it.
I'm the one who's innocent here, okay?!
ò?ó
Kamishiro held out his hands like an innocent child.
"If you hadn't done such weird stuff, I wouldn't have taken pictures, right? So really, this is all your fault, isn't it?"
CLAP CLAP CLAP!!!
Yamamoto and Nojima applauded like mad.
Scumbag! What a scumbag!
He completely washed his hands of any responsibility. They were dying to conjure a notebook out of thin air and take notes.
When it comes to scumbaggery, Kamishiro's in a league of his own!
"Keep it down, keep it down~"
Basking in their praise, Kamishiro waved modestly, then turned and asked,
"Don't you think I'm right?"
Yamamoto: "Totally! It's all because Kitahara lacked charm!"
Nojima: "If it were us, nothing like this would've happened!"
Kohei: "..."
Kohei opened his mouth, speechless, and stared at the two in disbelief.
Did they forget that just now they were compared to a monkey and some unidentified creature by real girls?!
He couldn't understand it at all.
As a hardcore otaku, Kohei figured if it had been him, he would've curled up in a corner and shut down entirely.
Two-dimensional girls really are simpler and easier to understand…
"Damn it! If you two morons are so confident, then go try it yourselves!"
Taking advantage of their arrogant daydreaming, Iori finally finished chewing the bread in his mouth and shouted at the two in fury!
Kamishiro was untouchable, but these two? What right did they have to mock him?!
"Heh."
Yamamoto and Nojima exchanged a look and smirked disdainfully at Iori.
"Just watch us!"
Then the two boldly marched toward the cafeteria interior.
They had an unfounded level of confidence in their looks and appeal.
Even though they had just been compared to a monkey and an organic blob, they believed… Those girls were just blind!
Girls who approached Kohei were obviously weirdos.
They were going to hunt down their own prey and charm them with their 'weapons' called "charisma"!
Ha! Glorious future, here we come!
Next—
With Kamishiro, Kohei, and Iori watching, the two confidently approached the girls they were interested in.
Moments later—
In just 30 seconds, the three spectators watched the girls' expressions shift from disgust… to forced politeness… to sheer terror!
The girls didn't even bother finishing their meals before they fled together!
"..."
Perfect. Just as expected. But still… that was fast!
The girls had only looked at them for a few seconds. What the hell did those two say?
They flopped harder than Iori!
Watching the two dejectedly shuffle back, Kamishiro asked curiously,
"Would you say that was death by daylight or death by reputation?"
Yamamoto and Nojima didn't respond—they just hung their heads, hiding their expressions.
Yamamoto: "Hey, Kamishiro, you haven't finished eating, right?"
Nojima: "Why don't we eat somewhere else?"
"Huh? No need for that…"
"No, there is." ×2
Kamishiro's mouth twitched. Had these two really been hit that hard?
They didn't even dare eat in the cafeteria anymore. Total coward behavior!
A true warrior should face failure head-on!
Of course—
That's what the books say. Kamishiro had never failed at something like this~
Even when the target was a married lady, he'd never failed~
Seeing their determination, Kamishiro shrugged.
"I don't mind… but are you guys really giving up on this 500-yen curry?"
500 yen!
Curry!
Those two words pierced their souls like knives. You could practically see the resentment forming a dark aura behind them.
Clearly, they really didn't want to give up on that curry.
But to Kamishiro's surprise… they actually did?!
"No need!" ×2
Hearing their response, Kamishiro was momentarily stunned. He suddenly became even more curious about what those two girls had said to them.
He'd definitely have to ask about it once they got out!
For now, he figured he'd better be considerate of their emotions; otherwise, he wouldn't be able to get anything out of them.
Eating out didn't sound bad either. But before that, he had one very important thing to do!
And that was…
"So what the hell was your plan anyway?"
He hadn't forgotten that a big reason for dragging these guys along was to hear Kitahara's devious revenge plan!
"Heh." Iori chuckled coldly, filled with scorn, his eyes calm and indifferent.
He didn't care anymore. Even if—
Before Iori could finish his dramatic monologue, two huge figures suddenly appeared before him!
Two pairs of bloodshot eyes!
{{(°△°; "}}!
They weren't about to take out their frustrations from striking out with girls on him, right?
"Hurry up!"
"Tell that scumbag the plan!!!"
Yamamoto and Nojima growled through clenched teeth, clearly struggling to hold something back.
It was only then that Iori realized—this wasn't directed at him.
Recalling how these two had tried so hard to drag Kamishiro out earlier…
He suddenly understood!
Shielded by Yamamoto and Nojima's tall frames, a devilish grin slowly spread across Iori's face.
Ah, so that's how it is!
In that case—
Let's give Kamishiro the revenge he deserves!
"The method of revenge... heh, it's too simple." Iori didn't hold back this time and said directly, "That associate professor, trying to get a promotion, opened a counseling office to improve his image with students."
He didn't need to say any more. One look at the sparkle in Kamishiro's eyes told him the guy had already figured it out.
Kamishiro was instantly fired up!
A counseling office!
This was going to be so damn fun!
He didn't even need Iori anymore—his mind was already overflowing with ways to torment that bastard associate professor!
"Then what are we waiting for? Let's go!"
Kamishiro immediately grabbed Iori and sprinted for the door, eager to start tormenting his "dear" associate professor.
He had so many psychological issues to consult about~
What he didn't notice was the sinister grin Yamamoto and Nojima were wearing as they watched him leave.
They'd been waiting for this moment all along!
Did he have any idea how devastated they'd been when the girls showed them those photos from the forum—Nojima in drag, Yamamoto naked with a bottle?!
Go to hell!
You scumbag!!!
________________