"Yo, Kohei, so this is where you were."
"We've been looking for you for ages."
"Here, the drink you wanted."
"..."
Watching these three guys put on their disgusting act just to get close to some girls, Kamishirou felt like puking.
They were never this attentive to Kohei before, and seriously… stealing his drink and passing it off like they bought it?
Buy your own, dammit!
The three of them didn't care what Kamishiro was thinking, placing the drink in front of Kohei and plopping down at the table like they owned it.
Not even asking the girls if they minded.
And then acting like they just now noticed the three girls next to Kohei.
"Who might you ladies be?"
"Do you guys know each other?"
"N-No, it's not like that…"
Kohei replied stiffly. For once, he didn't snap at these bastards.
From the look in his eyes, shimmering with desperation, you could tell Kohei was extremely uncomfortable and silently pleading for his bros to save him from this nightmare.
Seeing this only made Iori, Yamamoto and Nojima more furious.
If they didn't need Kohei to act as their bridge to the girls, they'd have already tied him up and tossed him out!
Nojima: "Well, let's get to know each other now, shall we?"
Yamamoto: "Yeah, yeah!"
Kamishiro: "What a joke… like this wasn't your plan from the beginning— oomph!"
Before Kamishiro could finish, Iori elbowed him hard.
Iori turned to the three beautiful girls with a charming smile.
"Would you mind if we joined your conversation?"
Faced with this beastly request, the three girls exchanged a glance—and surprisingly, accepted with a smile.
"Of course~"
"No problem~"
"Come sit over here~"
Their eyes were all locked onto Kamishiro, clearly making their target obvious.
They were willing to endure sitting at the same table as these three losers—for Kamishirou.
This was Kamishirou, after all!
The dream guy of two-thirds of the girls at school—handsome and rich!
That "rich" part was something Kamishiro had "leaked" himself through his forum alt account.
All part of his Kamishirot strategy.
Hey, when you're out in the world, your persona is what you make it~
Of course, the three girls weren't members of Kamishiro's official fan club—otherwise they'd have been there earlier when he got clobbered by Iori.
Still, that didn't stop them from lusting after Kamishiro. Especially when they imagined the jealous glares from other girls if they actually got him…
Just thinking about it was thrilling!
Before long, Kamishirou had turned into a status symbol the girls were using to one-up each other.
Realizing this, the three girls shared a fiery glance.
It's every girl for herself!
The girl in the black sweater grabbed Kamishiro's arm and pulled him to sit beside her.
On the other side, the cute girl with double pigtails chimed in:
"Kamashiro-kun~ I've heard so much about you, but this is the first time I've seen you in person. You're way hotter than in your photos~"
"Hey hey hey, Kamishiro-kun, has anyone ever told you that you look like a prince~?"
Their syrupy voices whispered right into Kamishiro's ear, and his arms were tightly hugged by two soft… somethings.
Kamishiro leaned back lazily in his chair—it felt like coming home. So natural!
He subtly shifted his arms, gauging their size by the "contact pressure."
Hmm!
Pretty well-developed!
Potential candidates, for sure!
"Hahaha, then may this humble prince have the honor of inviting my two lovely princesses to lunch?"
"It's such a pity—fate made us meet so late. But maybe that's why I don't want to miss this chance. So forgive my boldness… but may I have the pleasure of your company?"
His gaze turned romantic without him even realizing it. Though he wasn't in the mood for romance right now, he couldn't drop the act!
Looking at that handsome face and his dreamy expression, the two girls froze, their faces blushing bright red.
Same face as before, but now… why does he seem so much hotter all of a sudden?!
He called me a princess!
He said he didn't want to miss me!
The two girls felt like they were falling—hard.
If before they were just trying to make the other girls jealous by getting close to Kamishiro…
Now, they genuinely wanted to make him theirs.
This man belongs to me! ×2
(;?＿?)
Next to them, Kohei watched this absurd scene, utterly speechless.
Just one line and two girls were gone.
This was even easier than a galgame!
Like some kind of turbo mode dating sim?
But wait… if you're going to steal girls, can't you take all of them? There's still one left on this side!
"What's wrong, my dear Kohei~?"
Warm breath tickled Kohei's ear, making him bolt upright—his whole body as stiff as a steel rebar.
Beside him, the long-haired older-sister-type girl leaned gently on his shoulder, tenderly dabbing the sweat off his forehead with a handkerchief.
The more she wiped, the more he sweated!
Clearly, this girl's "target" hadn't changed—she was still fully committed to Kohei.
And now that her two gal pals had stepped aside, it was like her limiter was off and she became even bolder!
Kohei was more uncomfortable than ever.
Kamishiro was already lost in paradise, so Kohei could only shoot desperate looks toward Iori and the others for help.
And then—
He saw Iori's face dark as a storm cloud, with a vicious Shura Stand behind him!
{{(°△°; "}}!
Kitahara wasn't lying last time!
People really do have terrifying Stand-like spirits behind them?!
Cool-looking, yeah, but Kohei had a really bad feeling about this.
________________
'Kill him!'
'Kill them all!'
'Sentence them to death!!!'
Iori, Yamamoto, and Nojima glared daggers at Kamishiro and Kohei, blood tears running from their eyes.
This was nothing like the scenario they imagined!!!
And it was even worse than before!
Because the girls were protecting them now, they couldn't even punish these two scumbags as they pleased.
"Kitahara! Think of something—anything!"
Yamamoto gritted his teeth.
They needed a dirty trick now.
"How should I know?!"
Iori was panicking. How many dirty tricks could they possibly have up their sleeves?!
"Only way is if those girls start fighting among themselves. But they clearly know each other and get along… wait, hang on, I got it!"
As he spoke, an idea sparked in Iori's mind!
Same rule as before—only girls can counter girls.
If they couldn't make Kamishiro's two girls fight each other…
Then they'd just add another one!
A wicked grin spread across Iori's face as he stood and headed toward the cafeteria.
________________
"Haha, add me on LINE. Tomorrow night, let's go out for a drink—I know a great bar."
"And I'd love to make a special cocktail, just for you two… filled with love~"
Kamishiro had one girl on each arm, living like a king.
Still laying it on thick.
Well, this wasn't just fluff—
He was straight-up describing the debauchery he had planned for tomorrow night!
Huh, might need to delay that dinner with the secretary lady again…
"Looking forward to it~"
"We'll be watching your performance, Kamishiro-kun~"
The girls giggled, gently patting Kamishiro's chest, their eyes full of affection.
In just a few minutes, they were completely smitten.
Kamishiro flashed a smug grin. Yep—liberal arts girls really were his type.
Spending time with Chisa and Aina every day had made him doubt his own charm…
But now he knew—he still had it.
They were the problem, not him!
Ignoring someone as outstanding as me and liking Kitahara instead...
Heh, how laughable!
Kamishiro glanced toward the spot where Kitahara had been. It was time to see that face twisted with jealousy!
However—
There was no one there.
∑(′△｀)?!
Where the hell did that bastard go?
Just as Kamishiro looked around in confusion, a slender arm wrapped tightly around his neck with strength that left no room for resistance.
From above came a sweet and clingy voice, "Kamishiro~ Didn't you promise to have lunch with me?"
That voice—The white-haired girl?!
Kamishiro's whole body went stiff. He looked up to see that sweet smile, one that felt like a death sentence.
Gulp.
Forcing out a weak smile, Kamishiro said, "Actually, this is all just a misunderstanding…"
…
"Whew."
Seeing Kamishiro dragged away by the strong girl, Iori sat back in his seat with a cheerful smile.
That's right!
The mastermind behind this whole mess was Iori!
Originally, the strong girl hadn't noticed Kamishiro flirting with two girls—after all, it was outside and somewhat hidden.
It was Iori, this bastard, who shamelessly insisted she go and take a look, ignoring the girls' looks of disdain.
And the result—Kamishiro now had to explain to the white-haired girl why he was here, or he'd be facing a storm of public judgment!
Or possibly… a threat to his personal safety…
"Alright, what were we talking about again?"
Iori smiled and asked, his expression so natural it was as if none of what had just happened had anything to do with him.
Since the three girls hadn't seen anything, it really had nothing to do with him!
Now that Kamishiro was gone, the other two girls visibly showed their disappointment, replying to Iori's question without much enthusiasm.
"We were talking about which celebrities Kamishiro-kun and Kohei-kun look like."
"Oh?"
Hearing this, a gleam flashed in Iori and the others' eyes—ah yes, finally a fun topic!
They immediately struck poses they thought were handsome and asked, "So, who do we look like?"
The three girls glanced at each other and smiled slightly. It was their first time seeing guys so oblivious to their own lack of charm.
"Puchite Melodie."
"Pan Panisters."
"Oyama Yamaguma."
They answered without hesitation, naming people Iori and his buddies had never heard of.
The guys kept smiling and nodding, pretending to agree, while under the table they furiously searched the names on their phones.
In no time, they found the shocking truth behind the names.
Puchite Melodie — (French) A tiny piece of dog poop.
Pan Panisters — A pygmy chimpanzee.
Oyama Yamaguma — A naked comedy performer.
Bang!!!
"This is outrageous! Why the hell would you compare me to some chimpanzee?!"
"You should be thankful—I was compared to something inorganic!"
Yamamoto and Nojima exploded in rage, though oddly, they turned their anger on the wrong person…
Kohei: {{(°△°; "}}!
"Hey, hey, hey! This wasn't my fault! Why are you coming at me?! And poop is definitely organic!"
"Shut it! This is clearly your and that scumbag Kamishiro's fault!"
"Do you think we have the guts to yell at those girls?!"
"…!"
(???)
So… how are they yelling so fiercely while sounding so cowardly?
"I'm just saying, instead of focusing on me, maybe you should check over there instead?"
Kohei pointed toward Iori's direction.
While Yamamoto and Nojima had been fuming, that shameless Iori had already sidled back up to the girls.
At least his comparison was still human—he might still stand a chance!
So the shameless Iori started trying to bond with the girls over the "naked comedian" thing.
"You guys seriously aren't going to stop him?"
Kohei asked, trying to steer their wrath in the right direction.
But Yamamoto and Nojima just glanced at Iori—and then turned back toward Kohei.
"On second thought, we should take care of you first!"
"Why?!"
Kohei's voice was full of disbelief. He was a total introvert, and he had distanced himself from the source of trouble!
Compared to him, wasn't the actual threat that beast over there chatting with the girls?!
"Well, if you must know…"
"It's because… he's Kitahara!"
Their voices were firm. It felt like arguing with hardcore believers about whether Jesus existed.
"Because he's Kitahara?"
Kohei didn't get it. What did that have to do with anything?
But then, the next second—he understood.
Not far off, Iori had just gotten to the self-introduction part. When he said the name "Kitahara Iori"—
The girls' expressions instantly turned horrified.
They hadn't recognized him earlier because, well, this time Iori had clothes on.
But that name—they knew very well. In fact, everyone at their school knew it!
The worst stain on Izu University. The school's number one pervert!
Kitahara Iori!
"Um… we just remembered we have class."
"Tell Kamishiro-kun we're sorry."
"Kohei-kun, let's hang out next time—just the two of us!"
The girls quickly made their exit as if fleeing from a natural disaster.
Leaving behind a completely frozen Iori.
"..."
Kohei twitched. Now he understood why Yamamoto and Nojima were so chill about Iori.
His infamy was too overwhelming!