Year 54 of the Hidden Leaf Calendar, January 1st
Ichiraku Ramen, Land of Whirlpools Branch
Thump-thump-thump-thump....
Rapid chopping echoed from the kitchen. Kimimaro stood at the cutting board, his right hand a blur as he minced meat so fine it was practically paste.
Outside the kitchen, Akio sat with Sara and Haku at a low table. They were folding dumplings, Akio's replacement for a New Year's meal.
Originally, Akio planned to spend the holiday alone with his daughter. Then he remembered Kimimaro and Haku had no family in the Land of Whirlpools, so he brought them along. The more the merrier.
As for Karin, she'd wanted to come, but Akio insisted she stay with her parents for the holiday.
Ramen didn't feel festive enough, so after checking what ingredients were in the shop, Akio suggested making dumplings something warm, simple, and filling.
He described the folding technique to Sara once, and because she worked with dough all day, she understood immediately. She passed the technique to Haku and Kimimaro. Haku picked it up easily. Kimimaro… was reassigned to chopping duties as punishment.
Craack
Another sound echoed from the kitchen.
Akio sighed, formed a quick hand seal.
"Wood Release: Cutting Board Technique."
A brand-new wooden board formed in front of him. He carried it into the kitchen and swapped it out under Kimimaro's embarrassed stare.
This was the sixth board the kid had shattered.
Not entirely Kimimaro's fault, he was chopping with a weapon forged from Akio's "Forty-Meter Cleaver," a literal legendary blade, scaled down for kitchen training.
Blending training into daily tasks… Kimimaro couldn't not improve at this rate.
Akio glanced at the mountain of minced meat. With a flick of his finger, the pile lifted itself neatly into a waiting bowl, which he carried out.
"Kimimaro, keep going. This round is lamb."
"Yes, Elder."
Outside, Sara frowned.
"Dad… this is way too much. We could eat for a week."
Five or six hundred dumplings already covered a nearby table like a sea of tiny white shells.
Even though Sara and Haku weren't elite shinobi, their hand speed far surpassed ordinary people. Add Akio's help, and in less than an hour, they'd produced an entire feast.
"If we can't finish, we'll share. Kushina and the others haven't tried these."
Sara sighed. "We still won't finish."
Akio smiled mysteriously.
"You're forgetting a certain bottomless pit."
Sara blinked, then laughed.
"Oh right. I almost forgot about Whitey."
Haku paused mid-fold, blinking innocently. "Whitey?"
Akio nearly burst out laughing.
"Sara, I told you to call him 'Fat Cat,' not 'Whitey.' And don't use it now, the actual Haku is right here."
Sara winced and explained:
"Whitey was a cat Dad and I used to keep. White fur. Same name, not the same person."
Haku smiled. "It's alright, Lady Sara. A white cat sounds cute."
Originally, Akio planned to wait until everyone finished eating before summoning him, but since Haku seemed amused…
Akio bit his thumb.
"Summoning Jutsu!"
For some reason, the technique lagged. After a long ten seconds, a white, spherical blob appeared on the floor.
Haku stared. "Is… is that a cat?"
"Meow, who dares interrupt my feast?"
Akio's expression darkened.
"Who let a stray boar in here? Where's my Fat Cat?!"
Two Minutes Earlier, Hidden Leaf Village
The Tenten household looked very different from two months ago.
Not because Fat Cat had bankrupted them, but because they'd gotten rich.
Ever since they'd taken him in, the family blacksmith shop had gotten busier and busier. They'd even become an official supplier to the front-line forces. In just two months, their wealth doubled.
Of course, this was all Hiruzen's doing. Akio's pet was staying at Tenten's house, and the creature ate like a summoned beast. The Hokage couldn't just let it starve, especially since its owner was… Akio.
Tenten's family didn't know the reason. Fat Cat had a pretty good guess.
After it had once declared, "Meow, your prosperity is thanks to me," they'd started worshipping it like a lucky spirit animal. Which explained its current… rotund condition.
Normally, their meals were already extravagant. But for the New Year, Tenten's father had hired two professional chefs dedicated solely to feeding the cat.
"Tenten, bring him the fish first," her father said.
"Fat Cat, here you go!" Tenten cooed, carrying a platter of fish.
Fat Cat licked his lips and opened wide
then felt the tug of a Summoning Jutsu.
"Meow"
The fish was right there.
Seeing food he couldn't eat was torture.
He resisted the summoning for a full ten seconds, just long enough to bite into one piece
"Tenten, what's wrong with him?" her father asked as Fat Cat strained against invisible force.
"Are the chefs bad at cooking…?"
"Meoooow, I'll come back for you!" Fat Cat cried dramatically
...before he vanished.
Back to the Land of Whirlpools
Akio held the now-massive cat by the scruff.
"I don't know whose pig you're imitating, but fix your body size. Now."
"Meow…"
Fat Cat sulked, then deflated like a leaking balloon until he shrank back to his usual thirty-pound form.
Ever since becoming the Two-Tails' feline jinchūriki, Fat Cat wasn't a normal creature anymore. Half flesh, half chakra; he could alter his physique at will.
Why he insisted on staying fat was anybody's guess.
"I worked hard to earn that weight," he protested.
"For what?" Akio sighed, then pointed at Haku.
"Go on, someone here already likes you."
Fat Cat sniffed, then gave Akio the most human expression of disdain.
"You really can't tell boys from girls, can you?"
Then the cat waddled over and hopped into Sara's lap, purring.
Akio shook his head. Two months away and the cat had turned into a spoiled gremlin.
"Speaking of which, how are things with Tenten?"
"Meow, she carries me to school every day. Big improvement for her."
Fat Cat said this with suspicious confidence.
Akio paused.
"She carried you… looking like that? Don't tell me you used yourself as a training weight."
Fat Cat looked away, guilty.
"M-Meow...She's strong. I said so."
Truth was, Tenten had accidentally drunk some of his chakra-infused blood. She needed the exercise, or her body would overload.
Akio shot the cat a knowing smirk.
"Fine, fine. Keep being dramatic, Your Feline Highness. I'll go cook dumplings for you."
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