CHAPTER ONE HUNDRED AND SEVENTEEN: SOMETHING DIFFERENT
The days began moving faster.
Perhaps it was because I had stopped counting them.
After the breakup, I had spent so much time measuring my days by how I felt about Samuel that every morning seemed painfully long. I had woken up wondering whether I would see him, whether he would speak to me, whether he looked happier without me, whether I looked like I was coping.
Now, I simply woke up.
I attended classes.
I studied.
I laughed with Gift.
I argued with Victoria and Morayo over ridiculous things.
I helped with hostel duties.
I complained about Mathematics.
And, somehow, life continued.
There was something comforting about that.
The world had not stopped because my relationship had ended.
Neither had I.
That Monday morning, the hostel was already chaotic before the first bell.
Someone was complaining about a missing towel.
Another girl was arguing about whose turn it was to sweep.
Two girls were rushing towards the bathroom with buckets in their hands while a prefect shouted at them to stop running.
Gift was standing beside our bunk, struggling to tie her hair.
"Floral."
"Yes?"
"Help me."
I looked at her.
"With what?"
"My hair."
I laughed.
"You've had this hair longer than I've known you."
"And?"
"And you should know what to do with it."
She frowned.
"Are you helping me or not?"
"Fine."
I took the comb from her and began helping.
Victoria walked past us.
"You two are becoming sisters."
Gift looked at her.
"Jealous?"
"Of your hair?"
"No. Of our friendship."
Victoria scoffed.
"As if."
Morayo appeared behind her.
"Don't mind her. She is jealous."
"I am not!"
Gift and I laughed.
There had been a time when I never imagined this.
Gift and I had once been connected by the same person.
Now we were connected by something completely different.
Friendship.
Perhaps that was what healing did.
It rearranged your life.
At assembly, the principal announced that examinations were approaching.
The entire assembly ground groaned.
I heard someone behind me whisper, "My academic career is finished."
I nearly laughed.
After assembly, everyone hurried towards class.
Our first lesson was Biology.
The teacher spent nearly the entire period explaining a topic that seemed determined to confuse everybody.
I took notes carefully.
Halfway through the lesson, Daniel turned around from the far end of the class.
He raised his notebook.
I frowned.
He pointed at one of his notes.
I shook my head.
He pointed again.
I mouthed, "What?"
He mouthed back, "What does this mean?"
I almost laughed.
I pointed towards the board.
"Listen."
He shook his head dramatically.
Then he returned to his work.
A few minutes later, a small piece of paper landed on my desk.
I looked at it.
Daniel had written:
Please save me.
I smiled and wrote underneath:
Save yourself.
I folded it and passed it back.
He opened it.
His shoulders shook with silent laughter.
Our teacher suddenly looked towards us.
"Is there something funny?"
The classroom became silent.
"No, ma," Daniel answered.
The teacher stared at him.
"Then concentrate."
"Yes, ma."
I lowered my head, trying not to laugh.
It was ridiculous.
Completely ordinary.
And yet, I enjoyed it.
There was no pressure.
No hidden meaning.
No fear that I was accidentally promising somebody something.
Just friendship.
During break, Gift and I went towards the canteen.
Victoria and Morayo joined us.
Daniel was already there, standing with a group of boys.
When he saw us, he raised his hand.
"Floral!"
I stopped.
"What?"
"I need your help."
"With what?"
He held up his Mathematics notebook.
"You said you'd help me."
"When?"
"Yesterday."
"I said maybe."
He looked offended.
"Maybe means yes."
"No, it doesn't."
Gift laughed.
"You two argue too much."
Daniel turned towards her.
"She refuses to acknowledge my academic emergency."
I folded my arms.
"Your academic emergency has existed since JSS."
"That is why I need assistance."
Victoria shook her head.
"You're both impossible."
We bought our food and found a place to sit.
Daniel eventually opened his notebook.
"So…"
I looked at him.
"What?"
"Teach me."
I sighed.
"Fine."
He pushed the notebook towards me.
I began explaining the first question.
For the next few minutes, he actually listened.
I was surprised.
"You understand?"
"I think so."
"Try the next one."
He did.
He got it wrong.
I stared at his work.
"You didn't understand."
"I understood emotionally."
I burst out laughing.
Gift almost choked on her food.
"You understood emotionally?"
"Yes."
"What does that even mean?"
"I understood the question's intentions."
Victoria covered her face.
"Daniel, please."
He grinned.
I shook my head.
"You're hopeless."
"But you are still helping me."
I looked at him.
"Unfortunately."
He smiled.
For some reason, that smile stayed in my mind long after break ended.
I didn't know why.
And I didn't question it.
Later that afternoon, something unexpected happened.
Our English teacher announced that we would be giving short presentations in groups.
I was assigned with Daniel, Victoria and another student.
We were given a topic and told to prepare before the following day.
After class, we stayed behind for a few minutes to discuss it.
Victoria immediately took charge.
"We need an introduction."
Daniel raised his hand.
"I can do that."
Everyone looked at him suspiciously.
"What?"
Victoria laughed.
"You?"
"Yes."
"You struggle to introduce yourself properly."
Daniel frowned.
"That is because my name is complicated."
"It is Daniel."
"Exactly."
I laughed.
He looked at me.
"Don't encourage her."
"I didn't say anything."
"You laughed."
"I am allowed to laugh."
"Not at me."
"Especially at you."
He smiled.
For the next twenty minutes, we worked.
It was surprisingly easy.
Daniel was actually intelligent when he concentrated.
He had good ideas and explained them well.
I found myself listening more carefully than usual.
At one point, he made a suggestion that completely changed the direction of our presentation.
I looked at him.
"That was actually good."
He placed a hand over his chest.
"Actually?"
"Yes."
"I am offended."
"You'll survive."
He smiled.
And I smiled too.
That evening, I sat beside Gift during prep.
She was working on Chemistry while I revised English.
For several minutes, neither of us spoke.
Then Gift suddenly said, "You like him."
My pen stopped.
I looked at her.
"Like who?"
She gave me a look.
"You know who."
"No, I don't."
"Daniel."
I stared at her.
"What?"
She shrugged.
"You've been smiling all day."
"I smile."
"Not like that."
I looked back at my book.
"There's nothing."
"I didn't say there was."
"Then why are you saying I like him?"
"Because I'm your friend."
"That doesn't make you a mind reader."
Gift smiled.
"I don't think you're in love with him."
I looked at her.
She continued.
"I just think you enjoy being around him."
I considered her words.
That sounded more accurate.
"I do."
She nodded.
"And that's okay."
I smiled faintly.
"I'm not looking for another relationship."
"I know."
"I don't want to rush anything."
"You don't have to."
Her voice was gentle.
I looked down at my notebook.
There was a strange comfort in hearing that.
I didn't want another relationship.
Not now.
Maybe not for a long time.
I had spent so much of myself trying to make my relationship with Samuel work that the thought of starting something new felt exhausting.
Besides, Daniel had never asked me for anything.
He was simply there.
And I appreciated that.
The following day, our presentation went well.
When it was time for our group to speak, Victoria introduced us.
I handled the second section.
Daniel took the final part.
He spoke confidently, explaining the ideas clearly.
When we finished, the class applauded.
Our teacher nodded.
"Good work."
We returned to our seats.
Daniel looked towards me.
"We survived."
I smiled.
"Barely."
"We were excellent."
"You were acceptable."
"Acceptable?"
"Don't let it get into your head."
He laughed.
For the rest of the lesson, I could barely concentrate.
Not because of anything romantic.
At least, that was what I told myself.
I was simply happy.
Happy that I had friends.
Happy that I could laugh.
Happy that I no longer spent every waking moment thinking about the person who had broken my heart.
At lunch, I noticed Samuel sitting alone.
He wasn't looking towards me.
He was simply eating quietly.
For a moment, I wondered whether I should feel something.
I didn't.
Not nothing.
But not pain.
There was a faint sadness, perhaps.
After all, Samuel had once been one of the most important people in my life.
But the sadness no longer controlled me.
I looked away.
Daniel was saying something to Gift.
Gift laughed.
I smiled.
Then Daniel noticed me looking.
"What?"
"Nothing."
"You're staring."
"I am not."
"You are."
"I was looking at Gift."
Gift turned around.
"Why am I involved?"
"Nothing."
Daniel narrowed his eyes suspiciously.
I laughed.
And the moment passed.
That evening, on our way back to the hostel, Daniel caught up with us.
"Floral."
I turned.
"Yes?"
He held out a book.
"You forgot this."
I stared at it.
It was my English textbook.
I hadn't even realised it was missing.
"Where did you find it?"
"Under your desk."
"Oh."
I took it.
"Thank you."
"You're welcome."
He paused.
Then he said, "You seem happier."
The words caught me off guard.
I looked at him.
"Do I?"
"Yes."
I smiled.
"I think I am."
"Good."
He said it so simply.
No unnecessary questions.
No attempt to make me explain.
Just good.
I nodded.
"Thank you."
He smiled.
"See you tomorrow."
"See you."
He walked away.
Gift watched him.
Then she looked at me.
I already knew what she was going to say.
"Don't."
She laughed.
"I didn't say anything."
"You were about to."
"I was."
I shook my head.
"You're impossible."
She linked her arm through mine.
"And you're happier."
I looked ahead.
She was right.
I was happier.
Not because someone had replaced Samuel.
Not because I had suddenly fallen in love again.
I was happier because I had begun to understand that happiness did not have to come from one person.
It could come from friendship.
From laughter.
From academic achievements.
From conversations.
From knowing that I was becoming stronger.
From waking up and feeling excited about another ordinary day.
And somewhere in the middle of all those ordinary things, Daniel had become important to me.
I didn't know exactly when it happened.
I didn't know what it meant.
I wasn't ready to give it a name.
Maybe I didn't need to.
Some things were better allowed to grow quietly.
Without pressure.
Without expectations.
Without forcing them into a shape they weren't ready to take.
As I entered the hostel that evening, I looked around at the familiar chaos.
Thirty girls.
Fifteen bunk beds.
Buckets scattered around.
Clothes being folded.
Girls arguing.
Others laughing.
Someone calling for a missing soap.
Someone else complaining about hostel duties.
It was noisy.
Messy.
Ordinary.
And I loved it.
I climbed onto my bunk and opened my book.