Max was a day-to-day life office worker, with no money, no companionship, no smashing games. He was below average.
Mind the words, he was.
Currently, within the white space, he was in the queue for reincarnation.
"Next!"
"Next!"
"Next!"
After who knows how long, it was finally his turn.
"I'm the Angel of Reincarnation, Sir Mike."
"Hello, I am Max... Well, you do not need to know my name, but I'm glad to meet—"
"Who asked?... Don't care." Angel of reincarnation didn't even bother looking at him, his eyes fully focused on the life scroll of Max.
"19. Jan, 2013, My sister seduces me, a anime hentai, watched for 40 seconds. 20. jan, 2013, Watched MILF next door anime hentai, 50 seconds, 21. jan, 2013, googled 9 plus 9—"
"Tell me the way to hell, I'm going there..." Max whispered with his eyes looking at the floor, feeling embarrassed. He had always thought that he was an upright man, but the scroll was telling him the truth.
"There is no hell. In the next life you will start handicapped in extremely hard difficulty..." With that, Angel Mike snapped his finger.
"BAM!" White light surrounded Max.
***
"Arghhh!!!"
As soon as Max woke up, he felt a strange pain shoot through his body. All he could see was blood.
"Die! You sinful creature!" A tall man clad in white armor raised his sword, swinging towards him.
Wait, what... What's going on?
He looked at his hands, which were chopped off.
Fuck!!!
The memories rushed forth. It turns out he reincarnated into the body of a goblin who only uses their "lower body". Just a week ago, they had captured a few human women to breed them, and now the adventurer had come to kill them.
Fuck!!! What kind of bullshit is this?
Bang!
He died again, appearing back at the white space.
After the long queue, Max finally came to the front of the line.
This time the angel was a female with six wings.
"Goblin #Ae94bv7J6— kidnapping, raping, murdering. Hmm, for a goblin, understandable. You will have a good time in your next life..."
"Excuse me, I—"
"Don't talk to me!" The angel said, before snapping her finger.
However, Max was already cursed by the Angel Mike to have a hard handicap and now someone blessed him good life?
Max was reincarnated again. This time he had three wives and a lot of money but fuck it... He was paralyzed and the slave boy would make love to all three of his wives.
His wives said their hearts belonged to him, but their bodies belonged to a slave boy. Fuck it. Fuck that nega.
Damn it... he was supposed to have a good life but he can't enjoy it. All his wives were beautiful. He can only lie on his bed, unable to move, his mouth also can't speak. He could only cry.
Max cursed and cursed the Angel Mike in his heart.
After eight days, he died from a heart attack, reappearing back in the white space.
"Noble Max, corruption, abusing the poor and weak, enslaving others, suppressing religion, however, you had a bad life later on, you suffered as well, and was cucked by the very poor boy you hated. In your next life, you will start poor and ugly, but you will have loving wives..." the gentle-looking Angel with goat face uttered before snapping its fingers.
In the next life, he was born poor in a magical world as a humble decent-looking shepherd boy. However, he had three wives... Only to die in the hands of an arrogant Young Master Mage.
"You pathetic ugly shepherd... How dare you marry three beautiful wives, courting death!!"
After 3 years of torture, Max died again and appeared back at the white space. This time he understood two things, the Angel's blessing and curse would last every lifetime and not just "next life", so, no matter what happens he is destined to have a bad ending because of Angel Mike. That damn bastard.
And Angel can only judge from one life, even if he hasn't lived it himself.
This time the Angel had eight wings with nine eyes, the face was extremely difficult to look at.
"Poor life, had loving wives but they died in the hands of a mage... Hmm... In the next life, you will be reborn with powerful anti-magic magic, so, no mage can disturb your life." With that, the Angel snapped its fingers.
As fate would have it, both his parents were powerful archmages causing him to be born with powerful magic talent... However, powerful magic talent clashed with anti-magic magic within his body, making him crippled from childhood.
He lived for 12 years, during which 3 maids deeply took care of him, before he finally died from body dysfunction.
Once again, white space.
The Angel this time was an old man with only one eye, white beard, white robe. He looked like the Old Father God.
"Good boy, you lived a pitiful life, born crippled, live in pain and agony, but never giving up... In the next life, you will once again be born with powerful magical talent and anti-magic magic but it won't clash again, you will also be born into a noble family."
Bam!
With that, Max once again reincarnated... This time he was in the grown-up body, of a Fat ugly noble, whose father was a duke. He was born with powerful magical talent and anti-magic, making him arrogant.
What's more, he even tried to drug and do something bad to the princess but a noble sword hero from a humble origin can and save the princess, while chopping off max "main body part".
At the moment, he was imprisoned in the dungeon awaiting execution.
Max cried.
He was reincarnated only to die again. It's all that angel mike's fault.
So, currently he is fated to have loving companions, powerful magical talent and Anti-magic magic, born ugly and poor but noble, and most importantly he is destined to start handicap and have extremely high difficulty life.
Yeah. He was publically executed.
Once again, tada!!! White space.
There he saw it.... He saw the one who made him suffer. Angel Mike.
Did he wanted to beat Angel mike? Yes, he did.
But, if he acts with foolishness, he will only get more cursed.
"Max... Hmm... Arrogant, bully the poor, lawless, tries to drug the princess, hates commoners. However, you loved the princess, she was engaged to you, but, she didn't liked your ugly face and body, but In search of gold, you missed the diamonds, the three maids who liked you despite your ugly face, you chose to ignore them..."
"Your life could have been better, but the fault lies within you that you chose to drug the woman of protagonist... In your next life, you will have the same talent as a sword hero but the whole world will hate you for no reasons, every race, every being will hate you. All your talents will simply vanish when you really need them, to teach you the importance of being happy for what you have instead of hoping for better... Only when you realize what you have is already good enough, only then will your talent would reappear."
Fuck!!!
What kind of bullshit is this?
Bam!
Another life, another suffering.
He was born crippled without legs in a noble household but he was thrown into the forest right after birth, but he was raised by a female spirit, who didn't like his ugly face but still felt pity for a child.
He has the blessings of attracting hate from everyone, but also if someone once loves him, they will love him forever.
He was having a good time with a forest spirit, living happily until one day, a powerful adventurer came by, and decided to kill him for how ugly he was...
Yeah. He was ugly so, adventurer wanted to kill him.
In a dire situation, even his magic and sword talent betrayed him and he died again.
"Fuck It!!! Fuck all this shit!!! Why do I have to suffer so much?" Mike roared angrily within the white space.
The angel this time had 36 wings, giving some hope to Max.
Angel glanced at Max with its 108 eyes, "Max, originally from earth... Received multiple blessing and curses from different angels. I know you want me to remove the curse, but my child, it is impossible. Every angel possesses the authority of the Almighty, removing the curse is rebellion against Almighty."
Max's face twisted in anger. "Then why did you create me? I am only suffering for no reasons..."
The Angel thought for a seconds and replied, "Your accumulated blessings can't be changed however, i will allow you to reincarnate into any world as you desire, be it even fictional novels worlds..."
"Really?" Max was shocked, momentarily forgetting everything. Being able to reincarnate into the novel if your choice was a good thing.
"Yes. Also, you are getting too many authority from angles, on your next life, if you die, the time will flow back, sending your one day prior until you fulfill cause and effect, making sure all blessings and curses vanish from your fate..."
Max thought for a moment. Going to cultivation novel is a big no, no, he can't take the suffering in cultivation world. Those Mount Tai will torture his soul for eternity.
Then, he thought. Isekai world? Hmm, not a bad choice. But it was very competitive, he had to compete with the beta Jp protagonist, he can't afford that. Their power of friendship is too much to handle. They will scream and out of nowhere they will get a world ending skills.
"Sir Angel, you didn't bless me... You simply stopped me from dying, that's not a blessing... How would you bless my next life?"
"Hmm... greedy soul. On your next life you will never earn wealth, every decision you make will turn into loss of wealth. However, for a blessing... I will give you appraisal, you can see how much someone likes you or hates you. If someone hates you to maximum, you can copy the reversal version of their "skill"—if their skill is heal, you will learn anti-heal. But you can learn only 10 such skills. Once copied it's final, you can't ever change it."
Max: "..."
He was speechless.
"Sir Angel, I want to reincarnate into the world beauty is reversal... Meaning ugly is handsome and handsome is ugly, a world where wealth doesn't matter, a world where there is 1 man for every million woman..."
"Are you sure? You do realize that i can make you reincarnate as woman or donkey, right?" Angel replied.
"Oh!"
"Sir Angel, just send me to hell, I will atone for my sins there."
"As you wish! You will reincarnate you into a hellish world..." Sir Angel snapped his finger.
Booom!!!!
"Wait, wait... That's not what I meant—"