The walk to the nearest town, which turned out to be called Riverwood, was agonizingly slow. Mostly because Alferd had to concentrate on every single step to avoid accidentally launching himself into orbit.
The girl, whose name turned out to be Elara Vance, walked five feet behind him the entire time. Every time Alferd stepped on a twig, she flinched like a grenade had gone off.
"So, Elara," Alferd said, trying to break the awkward silence. "You said you're a Knight of the Azure Guard? That sounds pretty impressive."
She hesitated. "I... I am a squire, technically. This was my first solo patrol. The Dread Wolf was... unexpected. They usually don't come this close to the walls."
"Well, you held your own," Alferd lied politely.
"No, I didn't," she whispered, looking down at her chipped sword. "I was going to die. And then you appeared from the bushes and turned a high-tier magical beast into fertilizer with a casual backhand." She looked up at him, her eyes wide with a mixture of fear and reverence. "Lord Alferd, are you perhaps an ancient Dragon in human form?"
"Nope. Just a guy who drank too much gamer juice. And please, don't call me Lord."
They arrived at the gates of Riverwood. It was a standard fantasy starter town: wooden walls, guards in leather armor holding spears, and a general smell of unwashed horses.
As they approached the gate guards, Elara stepped forward, puffing out her chest to show the Azure Guard insignia on her armor.
"Halt!" one guard shouted, then squinted. "Oh, Squire Vance. Back already? And who is this... strange hobo?"
He pointed at Alferd. The YouTuber looked down at his "My Mom Thinks I'm Cool" graphic tee, now stained with wolf blood and grass. Fair assessment.
"Watch your tongue!" Elara snapped, surprising Alferd with her intensity. "This is Sir Alferd the... the Evanescent! He saved my life and vanquished a Dread Wolf single-handedly!"
The guards looked at each other and laughed. "A Dread Wolf? Yeah right. And I'm the King of Pixies. Move along, Squire."
Elara looked furious, but Alferd just shrugged. "It's fine. I need to register at the Adventurer's Guild anyway. I need an ID to buy a drink, right?"
"The Guild is in the center of town," Elara said, still glaring at the guards. "I will escort you there. It is the least I can do."
The Adventurer's Guild hall was exactly as Alferd expected: a large, raucous tavern filled with muscular people boasting about killing goblins. The moment Elara and Alferd walked in, the noise died down slightly. People eyed Elara's noble crest, and then Alferd's bizarre clothing.
They approached the reception desk, manned by a tired-looking woman with glasses.
"Registration?" she asked without looking up.
"Yeah," Alferd said.
"Name and desired class."
"Alferd Ceiser. Uh... Swordsman, I guess? Though I don't have a sword yet."
She sighed, pulling a large, fist-sized purple crystal from under the counter. "Doesn't matter. Place your hand on the Assessment Crystal. It measures your mana capacity and core stats to assign you a starting rank. Don't worry, it only tingles a bit."
"Go ahead, Sir Alferd," Elara whispered excitedly from behind him. "Show them your might."
Alferd was nervous. The Goddess had said his stats were "MAX." He wasn't sure how this medieval Siri was going to handle that.
He gently placed his right hand on the crystal.
For a second, nothing happened.
Then, the crystal hummed. A soft purple light began to glow in its center. The receptionist picked up a quill, ready to write.
The hum got louder. The purple light turned bright blue.
"Oh, that's a high mana reading," the receptionist murmured, sounding mildly interested.
The hum turned into a violent vibration. The blue light turned blinding white. The wooden desk began to rattle. Tankards fell off nearby tables.
"Sir, please remove your hand," the receptionist said, voice rising in panic.
"I can't!" Alferd yelled over the noise. "It's stuck!" It felt like a powerful vacuum cleaner had latched onto his palm.
Cracks began to spiderweb across the surface of the crystal. Beams of concentrated light shot out of the fissures, scorching holes in the ceiling.
WEEEEEEEEEEEE—
The whine became deafening. Everyone in the guild hall was now covering their ears, diving under tables.
CRACK-BOOM!
The crystal didn't just break. It detonated.
A shockwave of pure magical energy blasted outward. The receptionist was blown backward off her stool. Papers flew everywhere. Alferd stood there, covered in fine purple dust, holding the tiny metal stand where the crystal used to sit.
The entire guild hall was dead silent. A single piece of burning paper drifted down and landed on his shoulder.
Alferd cleared his throat.
"So," he looked at the stunned receptionist peeking over the counter. "Does this mean I'm a Bronze rank, or...?"