Ashina woke at 2 AM with a single, burning thought. Run.
She'd been dreaming of Silverpaw, of the freedom she'd taken for granted, of a life where her body was her own and choices weren't stripped away by teeth and force.
Now, lying in the darkness of her gilded cage, the need to move was overwhelming. Suffocating. The walls felt closer than they had hours ago, the bond in her chest pulling at her like a leash, Kendrick's sleeping presence a weight she couldn't escape. Now. If she was going to try, it had to be now.
Ashina slipped from bed silently, her heart pounding. She pulled on running shoes and clothes that would be easy to remove before shifting. Grabbed her phone not to call for help, but because the rational part of her brain insisted on having it.
Her hand hovered over the doorknob. Through the bond, Kendrick's sleep remained undisturbed. He'd said she could go anywhere on pack territory. The inner forest was safe. But Ashina didn't want the inner forest. She wanted out.
The door opened without a sound no locks, just like he'd promised. The hallway stretched dark and empty. Ashina moved like a ghost through the manor, avoiding the main stairs where night patrol might see her, taking the servants' stairs instead. Out through the kitchen door. Across the gardens. Into the tree line.
The moment the forest surrounded her, something in Ashina's chest eased. This she understood. Trees and earth and the wild scent of night. Not marble floors and crystal chandeliers and the oppressive weight of pack politics.
She stripped quickly, folding her clothes and hiding them in the hollow of a tree. Her wolf surged forward eagerly, finally allowed to run free and the shift took her fast and smooth.Four paws hit the ground, and Ashina ran. God, it felt good. Her wolf was built for speed smaller than most but quick, agile, able to slip through underbrush that would slow larger wolves. She ran with pure joy, muscles stretching, lungs expanding, the wind in her fur and the earth beneath her paws. Free. For the first time in days, she felt free.
The bond hummed in her chest, content as long as she stayed within territory. She could feel its satisfaction.
Ashina crossed the border at a full sprint and for the first three miles, it was bearable. The bond pulled harder, more insistent, like someone tugging on a rope attached to her sternum. But she could push through it. By five miles. The pulling became pressure. Her wolf whined, confused by the discomfort. Why were they running away from territory?. He's not our mate but the bond didn't care about choice. It only knew marked and mated and too far from Alpha.
Seven miles. The pressure became pain. A sharp ache in her chest, like the bond was literally tightening around her heart. Nausea rolled through her stomach. Her legs felt heavier, each step requiring more effort.
Through the bond, she felt the moment Kendrick woke up. His instant awareness that something was wrong, His panic hit her like a physical blow. Terror so profound it stole her breath. Not fear for himself, but fear for her.
She pushed harder, spite giving her strength. She'd made it seven miles. Surely she could make it ten. Surely she could prove the bond didn't control her completely.
Eight miles. The nausea became violent. Ashina stumbled, caught herself, kept running. Her vision blurred at the edges. The pain in her chest was a living thing now, clawing and burning .
Nine miles. She couldn't breathe right. Her wolf was crying now. The bond felt like it was tearing, causing damage in ways that would leave scars.
Almost ten miles, Ashina thought desperately. Just need to make it to ten but her legs gave out. One moment she was running, the next she was tumbling, her wolf form losing cohesion as pain overwhelmed her ability to maintain the shift. She hit the ground as a human, naked and gasping and unable to do anything but curl into a ball as agony radiated from the mark on her neck. It felt like dying. Like every cell in her body was screaming to return to pack lands. The bond was trying to physically drag her back. Ashina tried to stand. Managed to get to her hands and knees before her vision went white with pain and she collapsed again.
A massive black wolf burst from the trees.
Even through her pain, Ashina recognized him. Kendrick's wolf was enormous easily twice the size of hers, pure black except for ice-blue eyes that locked onto her with wild relief and lingering terror.
He shifted mid-stride, his human form appearing as he reached her. He was naked had shifted quickly without time to grab clothes but Ashina barely registered that. Barely registered anything except the pain slowly starting to ease now that he was near.
"You fucking idiot." His voice was rough, shaking. Not with fear. "You could have killed yourself."
Ashina tried to speak, but only a whimper came out. The pain was fading but slowly, leaving her weak and shaking and unable to do anything but lie there.
Kendrick knelt beside her, his hands hovering like he wanted to touch her but wasn't sure if she'd allow it. she felt his terror morphing into rage not at her, at himself. At the bond.
"I need to touch you," he said tightly. "I need to... the bond needs contact to fully calm. Can I?"
Ashina managed a tiny nod, too weak to maintain her pride.
His hand pressed against the mark on her neck, and the relief was instant and profound. The pain cut by half, then half again, the bond settling with desperate satisfaction at the contact. Mate. Safe.
"Breathe," Kendrick commanded softly. "Just breathe. I've got you."
She hated that it helped when he was the reason she'd been in pain in the first place.
When she could finally breathe without agony, when the shaking had subsided to tremors instead of convulsions, Kendrick carefully lifted her. Ashina wanted to fight, wanted to push him away, but her body wouldn't cooperate.
"Your clothes?" he asked quietly.
"Tree... first marker... folded..."
He nodded and started walking back toward pack territory, carrying her like she weighed nothing. The moment they crossed the border back into Moonlit lands, the bond sang with relief.
She felt him stop at the tree where she'd hidden her clothes, felt him kneel and shift her carefully to one arm while he retrieved them. He didn't dress her probabbly that felt too intimate instead he just draped them over her like a blanket. Then he kept walking.
Ashina expected him to lecture or "I told you so." But Kendrick was silent.
He carried her through the forest, his steps sure and steady. Other wolves appeared pack members drawn by their Alpha's distress but Kendrick waved them off with a curt gesture. This was between him and his mate.
By the time they reached the manor, Ashina's eyes were heavy. The adrenaline crash combined with the pain had left her exhausted beyond measure. She felt Kendrick carry her up the stairs, into her room, and lay her gently on the bed, pull the covers over her with careful hands.
"Kendrick." Her voice was barely a whisper.
He froze. "Yes?"
"Why didn't you lecture me?"
A long silence. "Because you already know it was dangerous. You felt what happens when you push too far." His voice was tired, heavy. "I don't need to punish you. The bond did that already."
"I hate it." Tears burned behind her eyes. "I hate that I can't leave. That my own body betrays me."
"I know." The words were soft, anguished. "I'm sorry. For all of it."
Ashina's eyes drifted closed. She heard him moving toward the door, heard it open.
"Kendrick?"
"Yes?"
"Thank you. For coming."
Ashina drifted toward sleep, her body demanding rest to recover from the trauma of pushing the bond past its limits. Her last conscious thought was wondering why Kendrick's arms had felt safe when everything else about him was a cage.
When she woke hours later, daylight was streaming through her windows. Her body ached like she'd run a marathon which, she supposed, she had. The mark on her neck was tender, sensitive, a reminder of how the bond had protected itself.
On her nightstand sat a glass of water, two painkillers, and a folded piece of paper. Ashina unfolded it with trembling hands. "The bond protects you, even from yourself. I know you hate these limitations. I know you feel trapped. But the bond isn't punishment. You're too important to lose, even if you don't believe that yet. - K. Below, in smaller handwriting P.S. Zara will be here at noon. Please eat something before then. You need to rebuild your strength."
Ashina stared at the note for a long time. Part of her wanted to crumple it, throw it away, but another part she was afraid to examine too closely recognized the truth in his words.
The bond hadn't been trying to hurt her last night. It had been trying to save her. To pull her back before she pushed so far she couldn't return. It was a cage, yes, but maybe also a lifeline. She hated that. Hated the complexity of it.
Ashina set the note on the nightstand, took the painkillers with water, and lay back down.
She didn't hate the note. Didn't love it. It existed in the same complicated space everything about Kendrick existed in, wrong but not evil. And somehow, that made it so much harder to maintain the clean lines of her hatred. Outside her window, she heard the pack stirring. Life continuing in Moonlit territory, unchanged by one Luna's desperate attempt at freedom.