„Being a good person is like being a goalkeeper. No matter how many goals you save, people will only remember the ones you missed."- Iker Casillas
What good is living, if all you do is stand in one place? You have to reconcile with the idea that comfort is an enemy. The more you feel it, the more you want it to remain with you.
Overtime, you won't be able to live the way you want to, because you would have gotten used to simply not doing much. Something will be pulling you back to the same, familiar comfort. That something will tell you that relaxation is better, and that staying in your own bubble forever will keep you satisfied for long enough, but it is a lie. Though, not an obvious one.
Humans have many desires that don't align with one another. Our wishes can't coexist peacefully, and we harbor resentment or biterness towards each other, at times.
In her own terms, Vivien wanted to create something beautiful.
To touch people's hearts so deeply, they would remember her for her words, personality, or something wonderful she had done. Time is fleeting, but pieces of art people leave behind, if taken care of and kept as a valuable treasure, can last for long periods.
Vivien got ready for her free speech conference. She put on appropriate attire and left the house, mentally preparing herself to speak in front of a bunch of people. She didn't fear speaking in front of others and the attention onto herself in itself, she feared accidentally making a fool of herself or making a mistake that would cause others to hate her.
She liked the attention and the positive comments, she's always loved to expose herself out there. But certain events in her life made her fear having all attention onto herself. She wanted to change that, once and for all, and to not be scared of the vicious comments of others or their reactions. She believed in herself that she could do it, that she could changer her mentality.
She waited in the bus station, a few buses stopping in front of her, but she would not step in. That was because she was waiting for a special person to arrive. Someone she had talked to about the darkness in her soul, yet he still looked at her like she was light in itself.
The girl looked around to her left, waiting for him to arrive. She felt a mix of nervousness and excitment as she stood by, awaiting his arrival.
Vivien spotted him walking towards her. She ran to him and threw herself into his arms immediately, not caring about who could see her. That was something rare for her.
Sylas hugged her tightly while chuckling, not having expected to be welcomed in such a way. He waited patiently for her to let go first.
Once the girl let go and stepped back, Sylas kissed her cheek.
„Ready for the conference?"
„I have the whole speech memorized. I'm reaaaady!"
Her enthusiastic reponse made him chuckle again.
Once the bus arrived, the boy took her hand in his and they stepped inside the vehicle. They took their seats next to each other, and Vivien watched the world outside as the bus moved past the buildings of Tallis. It had just started snowing a few moments earlier.
Vivien rested her head on Sylas' shoulder, waiting for all the stations to pass. Having him close to her was easing all of her tension.
She closed her eyes, and Sylas did the same, waiting to arrive to their assigned station. They kept sitting in that position for a few moments.
Finally, the two arrived at their destination and stepped out the bus. Across the street was the building Vivien needed to walk in and hold her speech.
The pair walked towards it and stepped inside. There was a huge crowd, and Vivien could barely hear anything else other than the chatter. The conference hadn't started, yet.
The girl let him know she'd need to walk to the front of the crowd to get ready to get up the stage. Sylas wished her luck to do her best and held her hand, then let her go.
The pair was broken up by the crowd as Vivien stepped forward, trying to find a way to the front. She squeezed through the throng and eventually made her way past the people.
Multiple people would be sharing their opinion on certain subjects, all random, but singnificant to them. After a minute passed by, a man walked up the stage straight to the microphone and was ready to begin his presentation. He spoke about the effect parents have on their children and how important it is to educate them so that they can have appropriate behavior in the future. He moved his hands while presenting and proving his points.
During his speech, an old lady's phone ringed. The woman looked down at her mobile device, trying to make it stop ringing, but she couldn't. She touched the screen haphazardly, not knowing where to press. After seconds of trying to stop the ringing, she simply put her phone back in her pocket, hoping she wouldn't attract too much attention.
Others were giving the woman accusatory looks, they were glancing in her way. That made the old lady feel bad.
Her phone ringed, once again, and somebody from the crowd of people listening in for the man's speech yelled at her to close her phone already.
Nobody wanted to help the woman out, so Vivien stepped in. She carefully came up to the lady through the crowd.
„Excuse me, do you need help to put your phone on silent mode? That will make it stop ringing and causing distraction."
„Oh, yes, please! My daughter gave this mobile phone to announce me when she's coming to pick me up with her car, but she didn't teach me how to make it stop ringing. Please, go ahead!"
The old lady handed her the phone, and Vivien immediately knew which button to press to make the phone stop making the ringing sound.
After she finished going through the woman's phone, Vivien explained to her what to do to set it back to sound again.
The lady was thankful, she expressed her gratitude to Vivien more than twice.
After the man's speech ended, everybody applauded. The girl joined in on the applause, knowing that it was her turn, next.
A man in a suit walked up the stairs which led to the stage, reading about Vivien's accomplishments in front of the crowd. Vivien was excited to hear her full name adressed to the people. Afterwards, the man invited her up the stage to share her words.
She walked up the stage to the microphone. In front of her was a stand on which people could place the paper with written words and read from it, but Vivien had repeated the script she had written herself about a hundred times in her head, just to make sure she wouldn't forget a single word. What every contestant had to do was state what their subject of discussion was, first, then get into detail, then end their speech by thanking the audience.
„Hello, everyone! Today, I will be speaking about the impact of certain beliefs and rules we have created, ourselves. I will try not to give many examples of what those beliefs and rules are, but to let you assume which ones they are, so as to let you focus on the matter at hand, which is their impact on our lives. So, I want to start by saying that we, humans, are the most sensitive and kind, yet the most cruel and ignorant. We can never decide between certain choices we get, and that shows. We like to create our own beliefs on what we think we should all act and look like, as if we are robots. We enforce beauty standards which are detrimental to our mental health and spiritual well-being. We also like to enforce morally incorrect ways of displaying power, of executing rules. We stay indoors too much, we don't talk to each other, then we all wonder why we're unhappy. Truth is, everyone is free to choose what they want in this world. Some rules and beliefs that are set by other people are engraved into our mind, and we can't let go of them as easily. It becomes difficult to eradicate them from our mentality, and that's what brings us sorrow. We, humans, create emotional pain, ourselves. It all started from somewhere, from someone who decided to create those exact beliefs and rules, and because of that single person, what followed and keeps following is spiritual pain. That is why having a healthy mindset is so important.
Some people act so ignorant to one's problems and suffering, feeling happy that they're not in that same predicament. They simply pass by the person that's suffering as if it doesn't matter, as if it doesn't exist. They dismiss it. But you will eventually feel great pain, too, because it is a part of life. Nobody will escape pain and emotional suffering. Think about who you could cling to for dear life, every day, if your legs suddenly stop working. When you realize there is no one there to help you up, what do you do? Reminisce on that situation, but change predicaments. Make the pain emotional instead of localized into your limbs. Therefore, ignoring someone else's problems when you know you could have helped is something utterly terrible. It is a privilege to know you have brightened someone's day. It is a privilege to know you have made someone smile, even for just a few seconds.
It is not embarrassing to feel. Nonchalance is considered strong, and sensitivity is considered weak. I believe that this should be put the other way around. People who allow themselves to feel and share what is on their mind are strong because they try to fight their negative thoughts, but those who hide their inner turmoil away and act like they do not feel are weaker. If you care about something, just say it. If you don't, then you eventually will realize that you do care, in your own way. Feelings are something we all hold, they connect us. We all understand them, we say: „I get how you feel", but then, we proceed to act like we don't care about certain issues, when the truth is that those problems matter. Everything and everyone matters. Everything carries significance, though the scale of that significance can vary, wildly.
Meanwhile, we can't go ahead spreading kindness to others, then spreading negativity to ourselves. Kind words matter so much more than anyone realizes, they can save lives and carry you through windstorms. Negativity just pulls you deeper into a self neglect hole you'll have a hard time getting out of. Setting ourselves free from detrimental claims and rules can set us free from negativity, which, in turn, sets us free from pain, itself. All we have to do is think positively and allow everybody to be who they want to be. Limitations don't exist, we only like to create them. Thank you for taking the time to listen!"
The people started appalusing and whistling. Some yelled: „Bravo!", others sat up and applauded. Sylas tried to scream, too, but his voice could barely be heard. The girl couldn't even see him through the big crowd.
Perhaps, just like the supernatural powers she had that she wanted to dispose of, powers which stemmed from somewhere unknown, all the negativity and sorrow from this world also came from a place we could never find out more about.
Vivien reached forward and touched the stand in front of her. Then, she bowed to the audience, pleased at the applauses she was receiving.
She didn't know that it would be a bad idea to touch the stand. Her emotions were through the roof, which made her unable to control her own power. The purple light flickered from her hand, and she was teleported into the year 2029 in the middle of the event.
When she stopped bowing and returned to an upright position, she was surprised. Jude was looking at her, smiling. He had a peculiar expression on his face. She didn't know why she could suddenly see him, she thought Jude only lived in their future timeline. Then, she realized what had happened.
Her sudden appearance startled some of the people walking around the building. They were looking at her with big eyes, and Vivien hated it more than she could ever imagine.
„Haha... nothing to see here."
She touched the stand once again and she was teleported back to the present.
For a girl like Vivien, interested in every single subject she could grasp the meaning of and constantly wanting to discover something new about the world, she was experiencing something different in that moment.
It was something she preferred to think of as anhedonia. It caused nothing to seem as interesting to her anymore.
All the excitment she felt from having held her speech perfectly, with no single mistake, dissipated into thin air just like that purple light. Vivien wondered why the magic liked Deyana so much as to bring her food and water, but couldn't give HER a break from the chaos.
Once arriving back to the present, where people were still cheering for her, she stepped off the stage. Some attendees had stopped applausing because they noticed her vanishing into thin air, others whispered about what happened.
She moved through the crowd and tried to find Sylas. She yelled for his name, hoping she would run into him. Eventually, the two found each other.
„We need to find Jude!"
„Alright, but why?"
„I'll explain once we get out of here."
She held onto Sylas' hand firmly and led him out of the building. Once outside, Vivien could finally breathe. The cramped space and dim light weren't enjoyable.
The two traveled to Elton High, went through the library and teleported to the future inside Elton University. Immediately after that took place, Vivien called Jude and told him to come quickly.
But he told her he was already on his way to the university. As the pair waited there for Jude to arrive, Sylas congratulated her for the speech. His words made her radiate with happiness.
After waiting for a bit longer, because she had been holding onto Sylas' hand and just then had let go of it, she noticed the letters FL engraved onto her righr palm. The initials surely came from Frida Loren, the woman they met the day before yesterday. She raised her hand and tried to take a closer look.
Eventually, Jude arrived at the scene, his amber eyes scanning over the both of them to make sure they were both alright.
„What were you doing in that building?", she asked.
„Believe it or not, I enjoy listening to conferences, and there's going to be a talk show held in that building in exactly ten minutes. I came there earlier and was waiting for it to start. I didn't expect to see you, Vivien, pop up in front of me so suddenly. It was hilarious."
„So our mysterious friend is a fan of ted talks? Interesting.", Sylas said.
„Would you like to tell me what this is?", she raised her palm to Jude's eye-level and showed him the peculiar FL letters still engraved on her right palm.
Jude's facial expression dropped from sheer amusement to concern. Vivien hadn't seen that look on his face before. It probably meant something bad was going to happen.
„You're branded. That means you can't escape the curse."