I'm heading back." Ivan said with a lowered face… a low voice. He knew well there was no one waiting for him. But he had no place to stay either… no option to choose other than this.
"Will meet tomorrow. Tata." Ryaan stood alone, waving his hand outside the building. The building was dark now, where only one apartment was lit. Ivan stared at his apartment, where light came outside from the small bathroom window. The big window was closed. That small window looked like a square box.
Ivan walked ahead, leaving Ryaan behind. Ivan stepped forward. On the way to his home, where light and darkness were waiting for him. He didn't wish to go there, but he couldn't stay at Ryaan's place as well.
In the hall, Jaya was holding the phone, talking to her boyfriend who was going to be her husband soon. She was happy; her voice was careless, full of joy and shyness, like a woman in love.
"Stop, honey. Don't talk ridiculous. Well, I'm going tomorrow to buy the gown." She smiled loudly and widely.
"Yes.
Yes."
Back to back, she said yes to something they planned to do tomorrow. Marcus was on the other side, holding the phone while buying beer from the supermarket. He threw the notes and coins in front of the salesman.
"One more cigarette." His voice was cold and harsh.
Jaya heard Ivan's footsteps. She glanced back at him; her face changed from laughing to serious. Without cutting the call, she asked with a rude face, her voice cold.
"Oh, you're back. Where were you?"
She tried to react like a mother, but she didn't think about Ivan missing since the afternoon. She didn't care to call his school to ask why her son hadn't come home yet.
"At my friend's home." Ivan replied without making eye contact with that lady who called herself his mother.
"You have to inform me, Ivan. Anyway, dinner is on the table. Come fast."
"I'm not hungry."
"Ivan… at least sit with me, okay?" Her voice was sticky. She was again pretending to be a mother or a family for Ivan. But she didn't know—it was too late for that.
"Mom… I—" Ivan tried to open up his feelings.
"What? Tomorrow we are going shopping. We'll buy a new suit for you and other stuff for the marriage." She interrupted him.
"Will you stop doing this in front of your son?" Ivan raised his voice.
"What am I doing?" Jaya asked.
"Torturing me." Ivan was shaking. He was crying. His face was filled with anger; his veins appeared on his face and forehead.
"Torturing you? What are you talking about?" She cut the call and threw the phone on the couch.
"Mother, I've faced a lot you know it. It's only been one year since Dad passed away, and you're planning your marriage." Ivan cried. His eyes filled with tears, but he tried to stand strong and talk to her.
"Then what do you want? Cry all day?" Jaya crossed her arms.
"At least pretend not to be happy in front of me, Mother." Ivan said.
"Ivan, we already talked about this. Your father and I didn't have a good relationship. I handled a lot, suffered a lot, and compromised. Marriage is suffocating. You don't understand because you're a kid." Jaya stepped forward to hold her son, but Ivan stepped back. She slowly exhaled.
"And you're planning to marry again, aren't you?" Ivan asked.