EXT. WARNER BROS. BACKLOT — "FOREST" SET — CONTINUOUS
Bugs leads like he knows where he's going.
Which is terrifying, because the "forest" is ten feet deep and ends in plywood.
Daffy staggers behind him, still faintly smoking, bill slightly… wrong.
Luffy follows overhead, swinging on the concept of momentum, laughing like he's discovered a new sport.
SFX:TWANG!
SFX:BOIOIOING!
SFX:WHEEEE!
DAFFY
(pointing up, frantic)
STOP FOLLOWING US! WE ARE NOT A TOUR GROUP!
LUFFY (GEAR 5)
(delighted)
I'M TOURING!
Luffy swings lower, kicks off a cardboard tree—
—except his foot leaves a perfect boot-shaped dent in the air itself.
The dent remains for half a second, like reality's buffering.
Then it pops back.
SFX:PLIP!
Bugs clocks that. Calm smile. Narrowed eyes.
He does a tiny two-finger gesture again.
The painted forest backdrop behind them slides with a theatrical shhhhh.
The edges of the set become more obvious: rigging, lights, a crew guy sipping coffee, a fake squirrel taped to a branch.
Bugs stops and turns around like he's addressing an audience.
BUGS
Alright, buster.
If you're gonna chase, we're gonna do this proper.
He points at a small wooden sign nailed to a tree:
SIGN:SCENE 14 — "FOREST CHASE (COMEDY)"
Bugs taps it.
The sign flips like a cue card.
SIGN:SCENE 14 — "FOREST CHASE (VIOLENT)"
Bugs stares at that one.
He flips it again.
SIGN:SCENE 14 — "FOREST CHASE (COMEDY)"
BUGS
That's better.
Luffy lands in front of him with a bounce, knees springing like rubber.
SFX:SPROING!
He leans in, smiling so wide the universe looks slightly embarrassed.
LUFFY
You're funny!
BUGS
I know.
DAFFY
(raising both arms)
HE ADMITS IT! HE'S CLAIMING THE BIT! THIS IS A HOSTILE TAKEOVER!
Luffy tilts his head at Daffy, genuinely curious.
LUFFY
Why is the duck yelling?
DAFFY
I AM NOT "THE DUCK," I AM A—!
Bugs points at Daffy without looking.
BUGS
A projectile.
A beat.
The universe nods.
A huge red rubber stamp slams down out of nowhere onto Daffy's forehead:
STAMP:PROJECTILE
SFX:THWOMP!
DAFFY
…See? SEE?!
Luffy claps like he's watching a magic show.
LUFFY
I wanna stamp!
He snaps his fingers.
A stamp appears in his hand.
It's enormous.
It reads:
STAMP:KING OF THE PIRATES
Luffy happily slams it onto Bugs' chest.
SFX:THWOMP!
For one glorious half-second, Bugs Bunny has "KING OF THE PIRATES" stamped across his fur.
Bugs looks down.
Looks back up.
Smiles politely.
Then reaches into the stamp like it's a pocket and pulls out a receipt.
BUGS
(reading)
Mmm. Unauthorized use of trademark. That's gonna be a problem.
He flicks the receipt.
It hits Daffy.
Daffy instantly becomes a cash register.
DAFFY
(voice becomes a register)
KA-CHING! I HATE MY JOB!!
Luffy winds up again, doing a goofy shoulder-spin.
LUFFY
Gomu gomu—!
He throws a punch that's less "attack" and more "playful declaration of friendship through violence."
The impact bubble spawns in midair in front of Bugs:
SFX BUBBLE:"KRAKOW!"
Bugs calmly plucks "KRAKOW!" out of the air like a man picking an apple.
He holds it up like a dinner plate.
BUGS
Nope.
Luffy's fist slams into the word-plate.
SFX:BLOINK!
The "KRAKOW!" bubble dents and rebounds like rubber.
Luffy's eyes sparkle.
LUFFY
That's so cool!!
He reaches out and grabs a sound effect bubble of his own—one that appears because his brain is vibrating at cartoon frequency:
SFX BUBBLE:"NYOOM!"
He winds up like a pitcher and throws "NYOOM!" like a baseball.
Bugs catches it with one hand.
It instantly turns into a tiny race car in Bugs' palm.
Bugs looks at the car, deadpan.
BUGS
Product placement.
He tosses it behind him.
It hits Daffy.
Daffy becomes a speed bump.
DAFFY
(flat, whispering)
End me.
Luffy laughs so hard he briefly becomes a scribbled outline again.
LUFFY
DUCK'S A SPEED BUMP!!
DAFFY
I HEARD THAT!
Bugs steps sideways, guiding the "fight" like a stage director.
BUGS
C'mon, buster.
If you're gonna throw words around, at least pick the classy ones.
He snaps his fingers.
A bubble appears beside Bugs' head:
SFX BUBBLE:"CLASSY."
Bugs catches it and places it on his chest like a medal.
Luffy is instantly jealous.
LUFFY
I want classy!
Luffy snaps his fingers.
His bubble appears:
SFX BUBBLE:"MEAT."
Bugs stares at it.
BUGS
…Different priorities.
Bugs suddenly walks forward—
—and keeps walking right past the edge of the painted set.
He steps out of the forest.
Out of the backlot.
Out of everything.
Into the white void between frames: a blank, silent nowhere where the scene ends and the universe goes to lunch.
Daffy follows without thinking—panicking—
—and immediately freezes like his body forgot it's supposed to be animated.
His mouth opens.
No sound comes out.
A subtitle appears beneath him, apologetic:
SUBTITLE:(DAFFY HAS TEMPORARILY LOST AUDIO.)
Luffy swings after Bugs with delighted curiosity—
—and when he reaches the edge of the scene, he doesn't stop.
He grabs the frame border with both hands like it's rubber.
The border stretches.
The entire world bends like a trampoline rim.
SFX:NNNNNNG—BOING!
Luffy slingshots himself into the white void.
Bugs turns and—just for a split second—his calm slips.
His eyes say: oh no. he can follow me here.
BUGS
…Huh.
Luffy bounces in the white void like a kid in an empty gym.
Every bounce produces a little harmless bubble:
SFX:"DOING!""DOING!""DOING!"
Daffy's audio comes back all at once.
DAFFY
(ear-splitting)
WHY ARE WE IN THE NOTHING PLACE?!
Bugs sighs, reaches behind him, and pulls a PAINTED BACKDROP out of thin air like a bedsheet.
He shakes it.
It unfurls into a new scene midair.
BACKDROP: a cheaper forest. Less detail. More obvious cardboard.
Bugs hooks it onto nothing.
It sticks anyway.
BUGS
Alright. Back in.
He steps through.
The world reappears.
Daffy follows, sobbing.
Luffy follows last—and on the way back in, he gives the frame border a playful tug like it's a rubber band.
The whole scene wobbles.
A crew member in the background looks up from his coffee.
CREW GUY
(to nobody)
I'm not paid enough for metaphysics.
Back in the forest, Bugs reaches behind his ear.
Instead of a carrot, he pulls out a GIANT ANIMATOR PENCIL.
He draws in the air with it.
A thick black line appears.
He draws a wall between them in two strokes—clean, confident.
The wall finishes itself with a little flourish.
SFX:SKRITCH-SKRITCH! ✍️
DAFFY
(pointing)
YES! YES! WALL! THANK YOU! FINALLY A BARRIER BETWEEN ME AND FUN!
Luffy leans forward, fascinated.
He taps the wall with one finger.
It squeaks.
LUFFY
It's just ink!
He grins.
His arm goes shiny-black with Armament Haki—except in this world it looks less like armor and more like wet paint.
SFX:SHLORP!
Bugs' ears twitch at that.
Luffy punches the ink wall.
Not super hard.
Just… playful.
The wall explodes into a splash of black goo like someone punched a cartoon.
SFX:SPLORCH!
The ink rains down.
It lands on Daffy.
Daffy instantly becomes a tar statue.
Only his eyes move.
DAFFY
(muffled)
This is an allegory.
Luffy laughs and grabs a handful of falling ink midair.
He shapes it like dough.
He makes a perfect little ink-animal.
It's a tiny ink rabbit.
He holds it up to Bugs proudly.
LUFFY
Look! Bunny bunny!
Bugs stares at the tiny ink rabbit.
It blinks.
It smiles.
Then it bites Bugs' finger like a cranky puppet.
SFX:NIP!
BUGS
…Traitor.
Bugs flicks the tiny ink rabbit away.
It hits Daffy.
Daffy is still tar, so the rabbit just sticks to his face.
DAFFY
(muffled)
MMPH! GET IT OFF! I'M BEING ATTACKED BY A SMALLER BRAND OF HUMILIATION!
The fight has drifted deeper into the "forest."
But now the forest is visibly breaking.
The cardboard trees are bent. The boulder is squeaking. The sign that said NO TOON PHYSICS now says:
SIGN:PLEASE DO TOON PHYSICS RESPONSIBLY
Bugs watches Luffy bounce-laugh, grabbing sound effects, punching ink, stretching frames—
—and Bugs' face tightens with the faint stress of a man who knows where insurance claims go.
BUGS
Hold it.
He puts both hands out.
BUGS
This is gettin' expensive.
He snaps his fingers.
SFX:SNAP!
Instantly, the whole scene gets cheaper.
The lighting flattens. The shadows get simpler. The trees become even more cardboard. A bird in the background is clearly a sticker.
Daffy looks around, horrified.
DAFFY
What happened?! Why do I look… slightly less detailed?!
A tiny label appears in the corner of the "screen":
LABEL:LOWER BUDGET MODE ENABLED
Luffy is delighted.
LUFFY
It's like a new island!!
He bounces.
The ground squeaks like foam.
Bugs snaps again.
SFX:SNAP!
Cheaper still.
Now the "forest" is basically a stage play. Painted flats. Visible tape marks.
Daffy looks down and sees his own tape mark on the ground:
TAPE:DAFFY — STAND HERE AND SUFFER
DAFFY
I WANT A NEW CONTRACT!!
Bugs snaps one more time.
SFX:SNAP!
The forest drops away like a curtain—
—and the entire world becomes a HOLLYWOOD PIRATE MOVIE SET.
A giant fake ship. Foam cannons. Extras in cheap pirate costumes milling around. A director's chair that says "MR. BUNNY" in gold letters.
A craft services table stacked with snacks, cookies, and—because the universe loves Luffy—MEAT.
Luffy's head whips toward craft services like a shark smelling blood.
His eyes turn into little sparkly stars.
LUFFY
MEAT?!
The drums in his chest get louder.
SFX (HEART):DOOM-DOOM DOOM-DOOM—
Bugs instantly steps in front of the craft services table like a bouncer.
BUGS
Easy, kid. That's not for you.
Luffy pouts.
His pout physically pushes the air forward.
A small wind gust flips pirate hats on extras.
EXTRA PIRATE
Hey!
DAFFY
(whispering, terrified)
We're in a pirate set. We're in a pirate set.
THIS IS "PIRATES IN LA." HE GOT THE TITLE CARD.
WE'RE DEAD.
Elmer Fudd stumbles into the pirate set from the side, still charred, shotgun in hand, blinking like he got teleported into a fever dream.
He reads a sign:
SIGN:PIRATE SET — STAGE 6
He turns back to the forest.
It's gone.
He looks at Bugs.
ELMER
…This ain't the woods.
BUGS
No kiddin'.
Luffy bounces toward Bugs, excited, arms stretching like he wants to hug and punch at the same time.
Bugs sidesteps with perfect timing—
—and Daffy gets caught.
Luffy's stretchy arm wraps around Daffy like a lasso.
Daffy yelps as he's yanked forward and used like a flail by accident.
SFX:WHOOOOMP!
Daffy slams into a foam cannon.
The cannon inflates.
It becomes a balloon animal.
It becomes a balloon duck.
It looks at Daffy with judgment.
BALLOON DUCK
(silent)
…
DAFFY
I HATE SYMBOLISM!
A loud voice suddenly booms across the pirate set.
Not Bugs. Not Elmer.
A director voice—big, impatient, union-approved.
DIRECTOR VOICE (O.S.)
CUT!!
Reality obeys.
A literal pair of giant scissors snips down from above and cuts Daffy out of the frame.
SFX:SNIP!
Daffy vanishes.
A half-second later, he reappears… but he's slightly blurrier.
Lower resolution.
Like a bootleg Daffy downloaded from a cursed site.
DAFFY
(looking at his hands, horrified)
NO! NO NO NO! THEY DOWNGRADED ME!
I'M… I'M STANDARD DEFINITION!
Bugs squints up toward the invisible director like he's about to have words.
Luffy laughs and claps.
LUFFY
That was funny!!
Bugs freezes at that.
Not because of the laugh.
Because of the sincerity.
Luffy isn't angry.
He isn't trying to win.
He's just… caught in a feedback loop of joy powerful enough to rewrite the set.
Bugs' smile changes—just a little.
From "competitive" to "concerned."
BUGS
(quiet, to himself)
…Yeah. He ain't fightin'.
He's stuck.
Luffy's gaze drifts back to the craft services table again.
His grin twitches.
His laughter becomes a little louder.
His heartbeat drums like a festival.
The pirate extras begin to bounce slightly in place without meaning to.
The foam cannons squeak.
The ship set creaks like it's about to become something else.
Bugs steps between Luffy and the snacks—gentle, but firm.
BUGS
Alright, kid.
New rule.
Luffy leans in, eyes bright.
LUFFY
Rules?!
Bugs' ears tilt forward.
He takes one slow breath.
Then he puts on the most exaggerated pirate voice imaginable—so corny it could stop a hurricane.
BUGS
Arrr… matey.
Daffy stiffens.
Elmer blinks.
Luffy's laugh falters for the first time—just a tiny hiccup—because his brain is trying to figure out what genre this is.
Bugs continues, fully committing to the bit like his life depends on it.
Which, in a sense, it does.
BUGS
Ye can't be doin' all that… on an empty stomach, savvy?
Luffy's eyes widen.
His grin softens… almost.
The drums in his chest hesitate.
SFX (HEART):DOOM… doom… DOOM…
Bugs glances at the audience (wherever the audience is), and for the first time he looks genuinely serious under the joke.
BUGS
(to Luffy, gentle)
Kid… you're laughin' like you forgot to breathe.
Luffy freezes mid-bounce.
A tiny bubble appears beside his head, uncertain.
SFX BUBBLE:"…?"
And for one fragile second, the universe holds its breath with him—
CUT TO BLACK.