The guards came towards us.They didn't fire.The silence was worse than arrows. Silence meant intention.
Tenzin said,"Here are your traitors."
All of us were shocked.It took my mind a second longer than my heart to accept what I'd heard.Dannyal looked at me with surprise.The guards captured all.
All his members stared in shock," We believed in you,leader."
"No,you believed in destruction, I believe in peace through necessary evil. But you all were just evil."
When they came towards the three of us.Tenzin said,"Not them.They are my allies."We were relieved.Relief indeed came first. Doubt followed immediately after.
He then gave the guards all he had looted,including the accounts. We still couldn't believe what had happened.
We asked him,"Why?". He didn't explain. People who carry old grief never do.
He just told us to follow him. We followed him because we now believed him. He took us to a cliff. Looking down the hill,he said, "This is where my father went down,in pride,in faith." Dannyal went ahead,"What?" Tenzin replied,
"My father was a rebel,a true one,unlike me." He said with disappointment.
"But not like other pathetic ones who kill for a day's food. He rebelled because he hated how unfair the King was." He said with pride.
"He destroyed but paid for the losses. Everyone loved him...except my mom. My mom betrayed him. As a result,he got caught. He was thrown into this cliff in front of my 10 year self.
The wind carried his words away, but the image stayed..." I condoled him saying,"I'm so sorry to hear that."
"Why be sorry? But my mom wasn't wrong. At the end of the day,he was a rebel after all. That was his status no matter his way of work." I asked,"Do you admire your dad?That's why you're a rebel."
"No,I hate him. He destroyed my childhood. Who teaches a child killing instead of sending him to school? I might be a rebel but I'm his opposite. I help the government. "
Wang hesitated — not because he was unsure, but because he knew it would hurt. Wang then said,"Liar!You adore him so you became rebel but you don't want to admit it so you took his opposite ideals."
Tenzin busted in anger,"Why would I take his opposite ideals if I love him that much?"
Wang replied with his head down,"Because that's the only way you would still see love in your only alive loved one's eyes...your mother."
Tenzin widened his eyes,"Why did I burn the inn or hurt the people then?"
Wang said,"Because you want to make yourself believe that you are bad even though you aren't. "
Tenzin still with his eyes widened,"Huh?Bullshit!It can't be that complex."
He left gruffing.Some realizations feel like insults before they feel like answers.
While he was going,I said from the behind," Humans are the most complex after all."
"Bullshit !" He muttered.
I asked Dannyal,"Still wanna get him caught?". Dannyal just smiled without saying anything.
We didn't go to the Golden Palace anymore. None of us said it out loud, but we were all too tired to keep pretending.
We stayed in an inn,like the one Tenzin destroyed.
It had rooms with outward long balcony with wooden railings, long enough to cover half your body. We sat in the chairs,looked in the moon. How easily an action could be justified after knowing its backstory amazed me.
But understanding didn't erase the damage. It only made it harder to hate. This fact disturbed. Maybe human feelings were never about reality but justifications of the reality. Oh,my mind is again getting hyper activated. It hurts !
Silence lingered in the balcony long enough to soften.Eventually, someone chose warmth over words.
Dannyal asked," Tenzin,what's your favorite food?"
"Umm,dumplings I guess."
"Oh,I'll bring you some." He ran towards the communal kitchen.
If you think why suddenly so interested in Tenzin by any chance. Simple,people love someone with similar experiences. They feel relativity.
Just like Tenzin, Dannyal lost his parents in an early age. They both had to work hard to even stay alive unlike me.
Same with Wang, slaved at a young age. Bought by strangers and pulled into wars, way too deep for his innocence.
Watching them laugh, I realized how differently we had all learned to survive.
I grew up in an above average family. No survival struggles. Love and care showered on after birth. How crucial parents' love can be for everyone is unexplainable.
I miss my mom and dad. To think of it,what must they be doing right now? I will give them a big treat when I go back.
Maybe sometimes you should give a thought about other people not getting what you call basic need not a want. Instead of comparing your life to others above you.
I don't mean to be happy and content seeing others' sadness; being satisfied witnessing that at least someone is under you. Or maybe I do mean that. I don't know my weird self.
For now, I should treat Dannyal and Wang with more care. I know I won't be able to return their childhood but I'll try a bit. I'm not good with showing emotions anyway, makes me feel I'm weak.
If only I could tell my mom,dad and siblings how much I love them. How much sad I feel burdening them.
How I wish I could tell them I cared !
Dannyal came running with warm dumplings ,an opposite contrast to the coldness of the world around us or in the heart inside me.
He asked with eyes shining as bright as the shiniest star," What about you,small brained girl?"
"Me?I'm fine.What about you,museum boi?"
"I would die for some shawarmas right now,but it's Qianlong."
"I have seen some wonderful noodles!"
"Oh,I will trick my stomach into craving them."
"OK,OK,you keep tricking your stomach. I'll bring two for us."
I ran to the kitchen. Oh boy,those noodles were firey fire.The taste,the comfort,those steam curled from a blue-and-white porcelain bowl as hand-pulled wheat noodles lay slick with amber broth, rich with bone marrow and soy.
Slivers of braised beef, scallion oil, and pickled mustard greens layered the air with warmth and salt.
A final dusting of white pepper bit the tongue, leaving a deep, lingering comfort fit for a Qing traveler's inn.
Feeling hungry? I say, still take the chance, take your family and give them a treat. Believe me, you won't regret it but your wallet might.Hehe.
I came back with the noodles. While serving, I didn't look at him. I could have gotten stuck at his lovely smile if I looked.
Dannyal thanked me and slurped them.
The night went long. Under that caring moon, who gives light to both sad and happy ones.
After that,we went to our room.We were standing in front of the window through which moonlight came.I asked Dannyal,"So,you got any plans?"
"Oh,I forgot we had to take down an Empire."
I said with crossed hands, "Museum boi." And sighed.
"Wanna tell Tenzin?"
"No,what if he gets us caught?"
He looked a bit sad knowing that Tenzin still might not be on our side.
I went ahead,put my hand on his shoulder,"If you wish,I don't mind going on a small vacation."
He said looking at the moon,"No,it's fine. I just needed some time to match here. I do kind of miss the Mughal Empire.
I said with a smirk,"I'm still here."
He said with a small smile,"We will go the capital tomorrow."
"You mean start the journey. It's a looooooong way."
"Oh,yeah ,yeah,hehe."
"Just don't take me to a cursed temple again,okay?"
"Yeah,sure."
No matter how gentle the night, dawn always demanded movement.The next morning we started for the capital. Only to be surprised at the cultural differences.