Bao Ji (Lia)
When I thought today would be a quiet day, news came from the emperor that all concubines would accompany him and the queen to the Buddhist temple to offer incense.
For a moment, my blood froze.
I wasn't a religious person. Worse, I had no idea about the rituals—how they worked, what to do, when to bow, when to pray.
Perfect.
We prepared quickly. No flashy clothes, no loud jewellery. Simple, modest attire. Thank heavens my maid helped me—otherwise, I would've been completely lost.
All the concubines—including me—waited outside for the queen and the emperor to arrive. After that, we would board the carriages. From what I had heard, each carriage would seat at least three people.
Just what I needed. To sit in a small, enclosed space with sharks.
I was certain each of them had already decided how to deal with me.
I glanced toward Bao Si. The look she gave me could've killed.
I was dead meat. Absolutely.
It had been a while since I last saw her. I half-expected her to come over and say something—anything—but she didn't. She treated me like I didn't exist.
I should've been relieved.
But the way she looked at me made my stomach tighten.
"I wonder if the emperor will ride with her majesty," one concubine said aloud, her gaze flicking between me and Bao Si, "or if he'll choose someone else."
Great. Fuel to the fire.
They all knew Bao Si had fallen out of favour. The emperor barely, or more likely, didn't pay attention to her anymore. And now, somehow, I was dragged into it too—because he paid more attention to me.
A small smirk slipped onto my face before I could stop it.
Why the hell was I smirking?
"Obviously her majesty," another concubine said. Then she added, "And if not Her Majesty, then Bao Si. She was the favourite."
My chest tightened. I tried to ignore the words, but a sting of sadness still surfaced.
"And what if it isn't Bao Si?" the first concubine pressed. "She's clearly fallen out of favour."
"I don't need to spend every moment with His Majesty to remain his favourite," Bao Si said coldly.
I looked at her, surprised by the sharpness of her reply.
The other concubines shot her side-eyes or scoffed quietly.
My chest didn't ease. The tightness remained.
Then the queen and the emperor arrived.
"Your Majesties!" we all said, bowing deeply.
When we straightened up, the emperor's eyes found mine instantly.
My cheeks burnt, and a small smile betrayed me.
Don't smile, Lia.
"The eunuch will guide you to your carriages," the queen said. Then she turned to me. "Concubine Ji, you will ride with the emperor and me."
Every gaze snapped toward me.
I stood frozen, stunned.
Bao Si's composure finally cracked—annoyance flashed across her face.
When I looked at the emperor, I could tell he was just as surprised by the queen's decision. But he didn't object. Not even for a second.
"Yes," he said calmly. "Concubine Ji will ride with us."
The moment his words settled, my body moved on its own.
The ride was quiet.
My anxiety climbed with every passing minute. The ritual loomed over me like a threat.
I sat across from the Queen. The emperor sat to my right. Our knees brushed lightly.
Each time I noticed it, my anxiety vanished—completely forgotten.
I glanced sideways and realised he was already looking at me.
Not ahead. Not at the Queen. At me.
"How did you sleep last night?" the queen asked.
"Good", I replied, forcing composure. "And you?"
"It was alright," she said.
"Just alright?"
"Yes. I was thinking about the incense ritual."
Right. If I had known, I would've pretended to be sick—or half-dead—anything to avoid this.
The rest of the ride passed in quiet conversation and long silences, my anxiety rising and falling uncontrollably.
After two hours, we finally arrived.
"Is everyone ready?" the emperor asked.
"Yes", came the chorus.
"…No", I muttered under my breath.
He looked at me, amused. I pouted back.
"Do we start the ritual immediately?" I asked.
"Yes. Why?" he asked gently. "You don't want to?"
"Of course I do," I said quickly, forcing an awkward smile. "Just asking."
"Let's go inside," he said.
The concubines rushed ahead to claim their places. The queen, the emperor, and I lingered behind.
"Trying to escape?" he teased.
"No!" I blurted out.
"It won't be so bad", the Queen added.
Easy for her to say.
"Afterward, we can spend some time together," she continued.
We entered.
The queen and emperor took their places at the front. The concubines knelt behind them in perfect order.
I knelt too.
Three incense sticks in my hands.
I copied the others carefully—bowing once, twice, and three times—slightly delayed but not enough to draw attention.
They closed their eyes to pray. I did the same… mostly. One eye remained open.
Then more bowing.
How many times do we bow? When does this end?
Eventually, they moved forward one by one, placing incense into the burner.
I followed.
When it ended, the emperor gestured toward the exit.
I was the first one out.
A deep breath escaped me—so sharp it surprised even me.
Had I been holding my breath the entire time?
"Someone seemed absent-minded," a concubine remarked loudly.
Fuck you.
"I didn't notice anyone distracted," the emperor said calmly.
He looked at me gently.
Silence followed.
"And everyone did well", the Queen added.
I looked between them.
They were covering for me.
The Queen had always done that—but the emperor?
That… I hadn't expected.
And somehow, knowing they both had my back made something warm settle in my chest.