— My apologies that you had to witness such a scene, — Yukino formally apologized as soon as Haruno disappeared from sight.
It was noticeable that her sister's departure returned the girl's former composure. Is it really that bad with them in terms of relationships?
No, I, of course, love to tease Komachi myself if the chance arises — though my precious doesn't lag behind, sometimes too successfully parrying lunges — but to this extent...
— Nothing terrible, honestly speaking, I even derived some pleasure.
Yukinoshita looked at me with a question in her eyes, as if unable to imagine how such a thing is possible.
— It's not often an opportunity arises to partially drop "restrictions," — I made air quotes.
Like, in the same squabbles with Shizuka, I have to adhere to certain boundaries based on different social status and position in society. In principle, a similar situation exists with my little sister, after all, the closest person in this world, can't really go hard. Otherwise, a situation like the one I just observed will arise. Do I need that? No.
— Are you saying that all this time you held your nature, offensive to the world, in check? — she snorted.
I nodded affirmatively, to which the club president sighed dejectedly, covering her face with her palm.
— And who did Hiratsuka force on me?
— Don't know myself, — I shrugged.
Probably better she doesn't know how much I sometimes want to express everything I think. Often only the remnants of sanity coupled with the awareness of societal norms stop me.
There are boundaries one shouldn't cross. For example, let's take a typical conversation between me and Snowball. Yes, I can quite put her in her place, somehow dance on her self-esteem, but in a rather mild form.
Firstly, she is a girl with whom, one way or another, I will have to interact for a long period of time.
Secondly, I don't experience clearly expressed negative emotions toward her, rather something like a feeling of pity mixed with irritation and a peculiar interest.
And, thirdly... a third reason isn't needed. That's enough.
A similar situation exists with Yuigahama. No argument, there are moments when Doggy managed to piss me off — the funniest thing is, without understanding it herself — which cannot serve as a sufficient reason.
Hiratsuka, Yukino, and Yui simply won't perceive my words to the extent that I imply them. And because of this, the lion's share of the thrill is lost, which is sad.
As the saying goes: "the game is not worth the candle."
But with Snowball's sister — everything is exactly the opposite. She absolutely doesn't give a damn about me, and I — about her. Plus the chance of meeting is extremely small. And if you consider the fact that the Troll understands the correct underlying meaning of statements, at the same time not hesitating to use "heavy arguments," thereby untying my hands for countermeasures...
No-no-no, such an opportunity falls too rarely to miss it.
Apparently, I wasn't the only one continuing to analyze the incident at that moment, for Yukino unexpectedly said:
— Even you she managed to interest, — she grimaced, adjusting her jacket, which had bunched up after Haruno's hug.
— Is that bad? — raised an eyebrow.
— Don't know, — the girl sat on the bench near the decorative fountain, placing the shopping bag on her knees. — It's annoying that everyone accepts her so quickly.
Ah... understood. Seems someone is a tiny bit envious.
Well, can't say I'm surprised by this.
Snowball, with all her external "magnificence," represents a vivid example of a withdrawn person still striving for communication — for confirmation, one can look at her conversations with Yui. She sluggishly fights back, tries to besiege Doggy's attempts to enter personal space limits, only she does it without fire, as if egging Yuigahama on to increase the pressure.
Haruno, in essence being the complete opposite of her younger sister, plays the role of an extrovert, a person for whom social space is a native habitat. Like the sea for a fish. And one shouldn't forget that people love to lie and create a false impression of themselves, especially when some kind of benefit can be obtained from such a thing.
Speaking of which...
— Yukinoshita, does she tro... tyrannize you predominantly in the presence of strangers? Or on a permanent basis? — couldn't resist the question.
The girl measured me with an unreadable gaze, I bet, pondering whether to send me away or send me away in the most sophisticated manner, however, she deigned to answer anyway:
— Depending on the mood, more often — in public. Your interest scares me, even though it is directed toward a person for whom I hold no warm feelings.
Here clearly lies the reason why Haruno treats her younger sister exactly this way, but something tells me that by asking such a question to Snowball, I won't get a normal answer right now.
Let's put the solution to this mystery on the back burner.
— In this way, you tried to say that you wouldn't wish my attention even on an enemy? — added indignant notes to my voice.
— Spot on, — Yukino didn't deny.
Everything, I see you have completely recovered.
Now need to decide: develop the dialogue further, since there was a desire to exchange witticisms with someone, or bring our prolonged hike to a logical conclusion. Or else an unfinished book and a couple of quests in the game await me. The main thing is that Komachi returns the console to the rightful owner by my return.
Speaking of Komachi: don't forget to buy cake!
The weighing of arguments was interrupted by a loud bark.
Attempting to determine the source, I saw a long-haired dachshund hurrying in our direction, amusingly shuffling its paws.
Hmm... Stop, I know it.
Squatting down, I looked attentively at the dog that ran up. The mutt looked back, then wagged its tail and fell onto its back, exposing its belly.
So you remember me, you disobedient pest?
— H-Hikigaya? — scratching the belly of the four-legged comrade, clearly blissing out from such affection, shifted attention to Snowball.
She looked a tiny bit scared, gazing at us warily.
— Don't worry, won't bite, — couldn't resist a smirk.
— I'm not afraid at all! — Yukinoshita bristled, raising her tone and moving further away from the beast. — They can quite possibly carry i-infection and other things!
Definitely a cat person.
— This is a domestic dachshund. Moreover, I know it.
— From where?
— Oh well... — answering evasively, with my second hand I scratched the dog under the chin, making it twitch its hind legs. — And where is your owner? Escaped supervision again?
— Sable! Sable, come to me! — girl's shouts came from somewhere to the side, as if answering the question I voiced.
The dachshund, turning its muzzle toward the sounds for a second, yawned, as if pondering: to go or not to go, after which it leaned back again.
So, betraying your mistress for the sake of momentary pleasure? How low, tsk-tsk-tsk.
And the voice is familiar...
— There you are! Sor... Hikigaya? And Yu-Yukinoshita? — I skewed my gaze toward the out-of-breath Yui, staring with shock now at me, now at Snowball, now at her pet, ready to melt into a puddle under the force of my caresses.
— Good afternoon, Yuigahama, — Yukino greeted her first; I, in turn, limited myself to a nod.
— Ah, yes, hi, — the girl smiled awkwardly, focusing all attention on me. — S-so I understand, Sable is with you?
— No, this is an illusion. Actually, you are sleeping, — noticing she was about to pat her cheeks, suppressed a sigh. — Joke, Yuigahama. Jo-ke.
— Of course I understood that, Hikigaya! — Doggy sharply removed her hands, with a noticeable blush of embarrassment on her cheeks. Pity that the fright in her gaze wasn't going anywhere.
— Is everything alright with you? — Yukinoshita finally noticed her friend's unusual behavior. — Did this person do something to you, Yuigahama?
I skewed a gaze at her.
Really? Talking about me as if not familiar? Kami-sama, Snowball, you should take a few lessons from your older sister.
— Only good and nothing bad, — not letting Yui answer, rose to my feet, due to which the dachshund, deprived of touches, whined plaintively.
Sorry, buddy, I need to sort something out.
Least of all I like being the cause of awkward situations.
— Yuigahama, Yukinoshita, don't want to take a walk in the park?
And why are you staring at me like that?..
***
Repeated, repeat, and will repeat: people are incredibly complex creatures, capable of making an elephant out of a fly, or vice versa — pretending as if, m-m-m... an ant is much more significant than a mammoth.
...Need to work on analogies.
In any case, at certain moments I fall into a real stupor, for example, when some of my actions — insignificant to me — appear to others in such a light that it's scary to imagine.
Look, happened with Komachi recently. Seemingly just ate her pudding, nothing special. Only the level of resentment that arose was completely incomparable with the deed committed...
— So, Hikigaya, would you be so kind as to explain why you dragged us out? — Snowball, weren't you told that interrupting a stranger's internal monologue is a sign of bad manners?
— To strengthen friendly bonds within the club. Basic mechanics of small social group psychology, heard of such? — swinging, threw a stick into the distance, making Sable, barking joyfully, dart after it.
Our conversation took place in the park, not far from the shopping center. Fortunately, there turned out to be few other lovers of walks in the scorching sun, so we were, one might say, in a peculiar solitude. Even found a bench covered by shade. Bliss.
— Are you capable of answering without sarcasm? — Yukino raised an eyebrow.
— I am deeply insulted by your disbelief in the purity of my thoughts.
— Doubt anything can hurt you except a heavy physical object, — too many compliments in one day, Yukinoshita, too many. I might get used to it.
— Ha-ha, your sparring doesn't change, — Doggy's laughter reeked of falseness. — But seriously, Hikigaya, what were you doing there t-together?
And skewed a gaze at us.
Right, let's try to imagine I'm in a comedy series where every step of yours is perceived in the most absurd way.
Worked without difficulty.
Next point: based on this, what conclusion could Yuigahama have come to?
The most obvious: "my friends are on a date."
Well, obvious to her, I definitely wouldn't have reached such a conclusion, since so far I am capable of reasoning soberly and rationally.
Taking the conclusion made as a basis, picking the most correct answer, which will be...
— Went to buy you gifts, — at that very moment Sable successfully returned with the stick in his teeth and, wagging his tail, dropped the prey at my feet, like, come on, repeat.
Smiling, picked up the piece of wood and fulfilled the dog's request.
— Hikigaya... — Yukinoshita drawled extremely irritably, as if wishing to express all the indignation of the world with my surname alone.
— Yes? — I turned to her.
The girl looked furious and embarrassed at the same time.
— It was supposed to be a surprise!
— Unfortunately, extremely rarely does everything go according to plan.
— What a..! — she didn't finish the phrase, but I understood perfectly well what she meant without it.
Yes, I know about such a thing as a pleasant surprise. There is even a method based on "emotional rollercoasters."
We take character values: "A person has a birthday soon." Add the following condition: "Need to pretend as if everyone forgot about it."
If the birthday person is a tactful persona or, in a way, shy, then until the last moment they won't remind about the upcoming holiday, little by little immersing in negativity. How so, friends — and forgot! Sadness will turn into irritation, rudiments of resentment, and similar things.
And here, at the very peak, when the indicated personality is already on the verge of hysteria, you catch them and congratulate them in unison. Bam, sharp rise, euphoria, acting as a bright contrast against the background of the previous state, thereby amplifying, and done.
Worries forgotten, only positivity remains.
With the rare exception of those cases when a person is really hurt but pretends everything is normal.
In aggregate, by the way, such is the main reason why "surprise parties" are thrown.
Haven't encountered such myself, judging by the experience of movies and basic knowledge in the field of human psychology.
— Really? Gifts? — Doggy's eyes lit up. — You remember my birthday?
— As the club president, I consider it my duty to congra... — Snowball couldn't finish, as a joyfully squealing whirlwind pounced on her.
— Thank you-thank you-thank you! — Yui diligently tried to strangle Yukino in her embrace. The latter, of course, made attempts to get out of her friend's grip, but, as I thought, did it sluggishly.
— Don't scream in my ear like that, — and how embarrassed she got, a pleasure to watch. Immediately visible — not used to such a stormy display of emotions.
...And why is it pleasant for me to watch this?
Having calmed down a little, Yui peeled off the club president, but not completely, intertwining arms with her.
— And what did you buy me? — Doggy inquired, staring ingratiatingly at the girl.
Oh, good look.
Three Komachi points out of six.
Won't work on me, but with Yukino — quite possibly.
Fine, so be it, I'll save your sinful soul.
— Secret, you'll find out when the time comes, — hearing this, Doggy let out a plaintive moan.
— But I'm already interested!
— Show patience.
— We-ell... — the girl, realizing she wouldn't get anything out of me, increased the pressure on her friend. — Yukinon, what do you want to give me? Huh? Yu-ki-no-o-on!
Snowball sighed in torment, throwing another irritated glance at me.
What? I showed you the way, go ahead.
After all, nothing ends on "surprises" alone.
One can always play on the feeling of "anticipation," which often works much better than the first method. You sort of know you are going to get a gift, but the question arises: "What exactly?". And here fantasy turns on at full blast.
The main minus: inflated expectations and unjustified hopes.
But I believe in Yuigahama's prudence.
...Although, being honest, in her simple-mindedness.
Ringing barking distracted me from thoughts again.
— Who's a good boy? — leaning down, I ruffled Sable by the scruff. — You are a good boy!
Spitting on my image, sat on the ground and began to scratch Yui's pet between the ears. A couple of dozen seconds were enough for the animal, after which the dachshund, yapping loudly, collapsed onto its back, exposing its belly to me.
Favorite spot, huh?
The difference between a cat and a dog is immediately visible. The latter don't hide their love and are ready to accept affection as is proper.
I wouldn't even risk squeezing my cat — Kamakura like that, since I'd instantly earn a piercing gaze full of contempt, in addition to a high chance of getting claws on my fingers.
— Honestly speaking, I am surprised you treat animals so well, — Yukinoshita remarked.
Seems she managed to cope with her friend, since the latter, noticeably pouting, was looking in the opposite direction from Snowball.
— And how, in your opinion, should I behave with them? Eat alive? — judging by her look, she imagined something roughly like that.
Should I give a lecture on prejudice or something?..
— In any case, I am in a slight stupor myself. Didn't think that after a year, Sable would remember me. Who has a good memory? You have a good memory, — the dachshund stuck out its tongue contentedly.
— A year? — Yukino clarified somewhat excessively tensely.
— Uh-huh, pulled out from under the wheels of a car when someone broke off the leash and ran onto the roadway, — that, frankly speaking, is hard to forget.
Without embellishment — it hurt a lot.
— And after that you ended up in the hospital? — the girl continued the interrogation.
— I think I already told you, and not so long ago, — or does someone consider me so unimportant that they don't see the need to keep "useless" information in their head? — Spent half a year on a hospital bed, and another twenty days — at home. Repeat: nothing but pluses.
— ...Sorry, — Yuigahama's quiet voice rang out.
Turning to her, saw how she, lowering her head, clutches the hem of her skirt.
— If not for me, you would have had a normal life.
Blinked.
— But it is one.
— But you don't have friends because of this!
— Think if I were in the ranks from the very beginning, anything would have changed? I'll reveal a terrible secret: I became an "asocial sociopath" long before the start of high school, — my iron argument didn't have the desired success, since Doggy squeezed tighter, almost sliding into hysteria.
— B-but... — she sobbed.
Sighed noisily, shaking my head.
— Listen, Yui, — hearing me address her by name, the girl raised her head, revealing wet eyes and trembling lips. — Let's do without excessive drama. I saved your dog because I wanted to do it, understand? Wan-ted. And suffered purely because of my desire. No one stopped me from waving my hand at it, right? Therefore, I blame no one. Understood?
Yuigahama, sniffing, nodded.
— Next point. I assume that due to a sense of guilt — in my opinion, completely false — you are somehow trying to compensate for the "damage caused." By the way, the candies were not bad, pity Komachi ate two-thirds. Well, nothing can be done about that, being an older brother obliges to make incredible sacrifices, — a smile flashed on her lips. Progress. — Again, continuing to read tea leaves, you saw how te-erribly I "suffer," being an outcast in the class...
For persuasiveness of the irony hidden in the words, showed air quotes.
— And decided on this basis... — here I fell silent.
Observe me for a year? Look for approach points?
...Learn to bake cookies?
Look, without embellishment, generally have no idea what was going on in her head. And somehow it's not particularly important.
— ...Start communicating with me. Seems like everything. Am I right?
— Yes, — Yuigahama confirmed quietly, for some reason falling deeper into despondency.
What is wrong now?!
Apparently, my bewilderment turned out to be easy to notice, since Yukinoshita, silent on the sidelines all this time, decided to enter the dialogue:
— It seems to me that Yuigahama considers her actions wrong, for her motivation for actions was initially built on self-serving motives.
I frowned.
— And so what?
Snowball raised an eyebrow.
— Normal people get offended by such things, Hikigaya. Although, in your case, it is worth thanking the gods for any reason due to which someone desired to contact you.
— Turns out, you fell under the spell of my beauty? — smirked.
— Aren't you too high of an opinion of yourself?
— No, just otherwise I see no single basis due to which you so purposefully try to run over my self-esteem.
— Your appearance alone raises a number of questions which, unfortunately, cannot be resolved without direct dialogue.
— How unexpected and pleasant to know that I occupy so many thoughts in your head.
— Craving attention so much that you are ready to admit your own worthlessness?
Whoa-whoa, someone got going in earnest.
Did the meeting with the older sister open Snowball's inner chakras?
— One hundred percent, hit right on the mark, — couldn't hold back a smirk. — Since I am the one starting every squabble of ours.
Only the insults from her side are still just as monotonous, a tad dull, to be honest.
— Um-m, guys, maybe return to the previous topic of conversation? — Yuigahama inquired timidly.
I shifted my gaze to Doggy.
— Is there something else that needs to be discussed? Seems everything was said.
— Does it not upset you that I have...
— No, Yui, — used her name again to emphasize the weight of further words. — Every person pursues one goal or another entering into contact with an interlocutor. Everyone. Don't argue, there exist such personalities whose motives cause rejection, but you are not among their number.
Now you understood everything, I hope?
Repetition is the mother of learning, but it's starting to grate on the nerves.
Yuigahama rubbed her eyes with her palm.
— T-then you will continue to be friends with me? — hope lit up in her eyes, due to which involuntarily swallowed a sarcastic answer.
— Yes. I will.
The next moment I was almost swept off my feet, knocked back of head onto a sharp knot. God, Doggy, your thirst to burst into the personal space of others frankly scares me.
Out of the corner of my eye noticed Yukinoshita smirk.
Yeah, yeah.
"Feel it all on your own skin," I understood you perfectly.
Sighed doomed and patted the girl on the shoulder, staring at the clouds floating across the sky. Sable's wet nose buried into the second palm, craving the continuation of the game.
Sorry, buddy, another time.
They are trying to devour me here, simultaneously drowning in tears.
...damn your youth.
***
What is the fundamental motive for any action?
Desire or necessity.
They can be expressed in a hundred forms and meanings, but their essence remains unchanged.
Nothing is done just because. Even if at first glance it seems as if the motive is completely absent, this is only an illusion which, extremely often, a person creates for themselves.
For example: "I have nothing to do, so I..." — continue further as the soul desires. Typical phrase, found everywhere.
And, the funniest thing is that many really think there is no reason, although it lies on the very surface — boredom.
Oh, how many things in the world were created by two atlases of progress — boredom and laziness, and how many more will be...
And people seriously give them a negative color.
No, I don't deny that in most cases, they actually bring more harm than good.
How stupid and short-sighted...
— Bro-o-o-ther, stop slacking, another set awaits you!
I skewed a gaze at my sister, clapping a notebook on an open palm, and pleaded:
— Komachi, mercy...
— No, no and once again — no! — the girl threatened me with a finger. — You asked for this yourself!
The tongue is my enemy.
Someday I'll get a tattoo with this phrase so as never to forget the golden truth of the universe: "Have something to say? Stay silent."
— Come on, don't grumble, I already want a glaçage.
— And what reward is due to me? — how soft and pleasant the floor is, would lie on it for eternity.
— Satisfaction from a successfully completed task!
— Hey, sounds kinda weak, — perhaps, I'll just stay lying flat until my body crumbles into dust, after which the wind will scatter it.
— Well, and a happy proud smile from the beloved little sister! Plus bonus: an hour of exclusive rest on my knees while I occasionally fan us.
...Sorry, floor, even though our relationship was short and fleeting, it was filled with happiness. It hurts to say this, but we should look for other partners.
Exhaling noisily, got into a plank.
— Still, you are a real sis-con, — my sister laughed and, not delaying, sat on my back, forcing me to grit my teeth. — A-a-and... let's go! One!
Closing my eyes, tried to detach myself from the tension causing tremors throughout the body, slowly lowered, touching the laminate with my nose, and rose, feeling veins bulging on my forehead.
— Two!
— Three!
— Four!..
The last time was given with the greatest difficulty, I couldn't even unbend my arms to the end, collapsing like a sack of rice, trying with all my might to inhale the desired oxygen, ignoring the metallic taste in my mouth.
— Well done, brother, I'm proud of you, — before getting up from my mortal carcass, Komachi ruffled my hair. — Now scoot to the shower, and I will patiently wait for you in the kitchen.
Whistling under her breath, the girl left the room.
Emitting a drawn-out groan, rested my forehead on the floor.
...Listen, I understand we parted not on the best note, but maybe let's start over?
***
— You still haven't gone to the hairdresser? — Komachi inquired, brazenly throwing her legs onto my stomach.
Having carried out a successful combination of attacks, I smiled satisfied, collecting loot from the defeated opponent.
— Need to?
— Honestly? Don't know. Doesn't the bangs bother you? So, right or left for us?
— Yeah, got used to it somehow, — confirming my words habitually blew away the hair that got into my eyes. — Right, boss room there.
— Look, if anything — can lend a hair clip. Can we handle it? I have a low level.
— Agree only to pink and with rhinestones, — directed the character, preparing to accept a difficult battle. — Don't worry, I have enough strength to take him down. Moreover, there is a high chance of getting a good item for your class.
— Okay, then forward, my faithful steam engine.
Smirking, portrayed a loud toot.
Perhaps, for someone spending summer holidays at home alone with a younger sister will seem a waste of time, however for me — this was the best option. Especially when, finally, managed to drag Komachi into my favorite game. Of the minuses: had to fork out for a second console, but what won't you do for the sake of pure and sincere love for a younger sister?
Fortunately, considering I almost don't spend pocket money, there are some savings. Remains to hope that no one's birthdays are foreseen in the near future, for which will have to drop a shekel or two.
Speaking of gifts: my theory about Yuigahama's simple-mindedness was justified one hundred percent. Couldn't even imagine that someone could be so happy with an apron and oven mitts. Although, most likely, the very fact of attention rendered influenced more here.
Or the opportunity to thus reduce stress, the level of which, usually, reaches a critical mark in the last days before the start of the holidays, when seemingly a little bit, and already the desire to tighten the noose tighter strengthens.
However, Yukinoshita held a different opinion. An impression was forming that the absence of obligation to go to school for her is a minus rather than a plus. Not that this was surprising.
Firstly, Snowball has no obvious problems with studies, therefore several factors disappear immediately due to which for the majority an educational institution is akin to a torture chamber. Like the necessity of tedious cramming or passing tests.
Secondly, she will have fewer opportunities to communicate with Yui. Loneliness is such a thing, hard to get used to, but extremely easy to break the habit of.
And the third reason, I think, is hidden in one odious girl connected to Yukino by blood kinship — her older sister. And there are slight suspicions that with parents too the club head doesn't have everything so rosy. Judging by available information, the father of the family is an important shot in some department, and the matriarch's name often flashes in news feeds. Such personalities often love to "tyrannize" their own offspring, having noble or not so noble motives behind them.
Or everything isn't so, and I sucked the theory out of a finger, and actually — she has loving and understanding parents surrounding their offspring with care and support...
Smirked.
Yeah, yeah.
In any case, concerns me little. Much more important is that I have been enjoying idle idleness for two whole weeks already. No strange requests, intrusive personalities, problems out of nowhere.
Sit yourself, play. Want — with sister, want — ping comrades and hack into some shooter. If even that is tired, then no one stops lying on the sofa with a mug of freshly brewed coffee, reading another opus about the adventures of a brave hero in another world. In principle, can go for a walk too, however, no special desire was observed to leave the cozy, and most importantly — cool! — house unnecessarily.
In short, pure bliss.
At that very moment, as if mocking all my thoughts, the trill of the telephone rang out.
Stomach cramped treacherously. Sense trouble.
Reaching out, grabbed the mobile.
— Sensei? — scratched the back of the head, pondering whether to accept the call or not. Extremely doubt she is calling me out of idle curiosity.
One hundred yen that they want to load me with problems.
While I was deciding, the cellular went quiet, however, as soon as I wanted to return it to the previous place, it vibrated again, announcing the living room with an intrusive melody.
— Either answer, or put on silent, — Komachi grumbled, dissatisfied that I left her one on one with a crowd of mobs.
— Don't pout, — spitting, accepted the call, bringing the phone to the ear.
— Finally answered! Hikigaya, weren't you taught that ignoring a teacher is a bad habit? — Hiratsuka's cheerful voice came from the receiver.
— The subscriber is temporarily unavailable, call ba...
— Cut it out, boy. Better say: are you free now? Yes or yes, you have no other option.
Sighed.
Dictatorship, malicious dictatorship.
...Ri-i-ight, dismiss thoughts about Shizuka in a leather suit and with a whip in hands.
— Let's assume free, — she won't peel off me anyway. Easier to agree immediately.
— Excellent! Then I have the following proposal for you...
Five minutes of fierce disputes later, I threw the darkened phone aside and, throwing my head back, emitted a drawn-out moan full of internal suffering.
Why am I always loaded with problems, and not say... a crate of coffee?
...or two?
— Brother, screw it. Boss is waiting for us here.