Transcendent Chat Group
Yanfei: So she's openly disrespectful to Rex Lapis, yet secretly collects his little dolls… wow. Didn't expect you to be like this, Keqing!
Lumine: Hehe~ classic tsundere behavior.
Alice: Ah, tsunderes… completely out of meta these days~
Furina: Oho~ looks like we've stumbled upon something quite scandalous.
Barbara: Just like big sis! All serious on the surface, but secretly the complete opposite—
Jean: …
Jean's lips twitched.
What was that supposed to imply?
It made it sound like she had some embarrassing double life…
Xiangling: To be honest, even I didn't expect this!
Kujou Sara: Very normal! Liyue's respect for the Geo Lord is like our reverence for the Shogun! Even if not openly, in private—absolutely!
Barbara: So Inazuma also has… dolls?
Sara: That is not a doll. It is a handcrafted statue of the Almighty Narukami Ogosho, The Immovable God!
Paimon: The… The Almi—The Ogo—The… what?
Sara: The Almighty Narukami Ogosho, The Immovable God!
Sara: Designed by the best illustrators of Yae Publishing House, sculpted by the most skilled lacquer artisans in Inazuma City! Only such craftsmanship could capture even one-thousandth of the Shogun's divine solemnity!
Sara: Of course, to preserve its glory eternally, one must purchase a special altar and enshrine it properly!
Sara: It must be dusted daily, polished regularly, and ideally, maintained by a specialist—
…
Originally they were discussing Keqing.
Suddenly Sara had taken over with expert-level enthusiasm.
Everyone fell silent for a moment.
This—
This was true professionalism.
Inazuma — Tenshukaku
Kujou Sara was on her way to deliver a meal to the Shogun.
Halfway up the steps, she suddenly froze.
"…crap."
"I got too carried away.
I forgot the Shogun herself is IN the group…"
She felt faint.
This was supposed to be Liyue's humiliation arc.
How did she end up socially dying?!
Unfortunately for her, the fox had no mercy.
Yae Miko: General Sara, don't stop now~ There are still four more rules of divine statue maintenance~ (smirk)
Sara: …
Ei: Miko, come to the Tenshukaku later. I have a sample figurine for you.
You may… do with it as you wish.
Yae Miko: Oh my, how thoughtful of you~
Jade Chamber
Keqing breathed out in relief when the group chat's focus shifted away from her.
"Whew…
Good, good!
At least no one's staring at me anymore."
"But who knew Kujou Sara was such a professional collector?
I should exchange tips with her later…"
Her confidence fully restored, she lifted her chin again.
After all—
she only had that one embarrassing flaw.
Once this part was over, it would finally move on to Ganyu!
Thinking of how Ganyu teased her earlier, Keqing's little tiger teeth clenched.
Hmph!
Dare mock me?
Just wait—
I'll return the favor!
…
Completely forgetting that Arthur had said:
"Non-serious item number ONE."
Which meant…
there were still number two, three, four…
Blue Star — Villa
Arthur continued:
"Next—non-serious item number two: 'The Butt-Twisting Evil Sword Style.'"
He played a video.
The screen showed Keqing wielding Lion's Roar, striking gracefully in a training ground—
her movements sharp, elegant, swift—
—but with that slight sideways hip twist typical of the Yunlai Swordsmanship.
Most people normally wouldn't notice anything odd.
But after the previous "Morax fangirl" revelation,
the chat AND viewers instantly had… creative interpretations.
Many viewers tried to act polite and ignore it.
But inside the Jade Chamber—
they didn't have that restraint.
Jade Chamber
"A… butt-tilting sword style?"
Ningguang raised an eyebrow.
"Well, I must admit… that name is rather accurate."
Keqing exploded instantly.
"It's NOT some 'butt-twisting evil style'!
It's Yunlai Swordsmanship!!"
"That posture maximizes momentum transfer through the hips,
allowing a full-body strike!"
"It's perfectly proper sword form!!"
A moment ago she'd been ready to mock Ganyu.
Now fate had slapped her first.
And the worst part?
The explanation was sound—
but the nickname stuck anyway.
Keqing's eyes dimmed.
Her reputation… utterly ruined.
Ganyu calmly nodded, face serious—but eyes sparkling with suppressed laughter.
"Yes, yes.
Understood.
The butt-twisting sword style."
"It's Yunlai Swordsmanship!! YUN-LAI!!"
"Yes, Keqing… the butt-twisting sword style."
"..."
Ganyu's newfound confidence made her annoyingly immune to rebuttal.
Keqing felt her soul leaving her body.
She checked the chat group—
luckily, they were still talking about rocks and dolls, not her misery.
But comparing her to Kujou Sara's "professional devotion"…
Keqing felt a second wave of embarrassment.
This day…
was too much.
Now she truly understood the pain Lumine, Jean, and Barbara had felt before.
This damned light-screen host really enjoyed exposing people's weaknesses…
Mondstadt — Good Hunter Restaurant
"Hmph!"
Lumine crossed her arms, glaring at the screen.
"First it was 'Jean's perfect butt', now it's 'Keqing's butt-twisting sword style'.
This light-screen guy is DEFINITELY an LSP!"
Paimon munched her food while nodding vigorously.
"It's true…
normal people don't stare at those things!"
Then Paimon peeked at Lumine's annoyed expression and grinned mischievously.
"Hehe…
Someone's jealous again~?"
"Eh—?!
W-Why did you say again?!"
"What's there to be jealous of?!
It's not like I lose to Jean!
And definitely not to that Liyue Yuheng!"
"In fact—
if you don't believe me—
I can show you this so-called 'butt-twisting sword style' back at the room!"
Paimon nearly dropped her plate.
This woman—
was built DIFFERENT.
(Wouldn't it be easier to show it to the light-screen guy directly?)
—Paimon thought, but did not dare to say.
"Alright, let me just finish this—"
Before she could take another bite, Lumine grabbed her by the collar.
"No time.
We're going!"
"MY FOOD—!!"
"I have the『Gourmet Tablecloth』. You'll eat later!"
"You didn't pay yet!"
"Oh—right. Wait here."
"..."
Blue Star — Villa
Arthur had no idea Lumine now considered him an LSP.
Nor did he know she was about to demonstrate Yunlai Swordsmanship… out of pure competitiveness.
If he knew, he would've given a thumbs-up.
Good job, Scum-Lumine!
He smiled and continued:
"Alright—next is non-serious item number three—
Keqing's lifelong nemesis:
The Electro Slime."
Keqing: ???
To read advanced Chapters, head over to p@treon:
patreon.com/nani_kaito