What was the first thing one should do when they wanted to run away?
The answer was never to appear as if they wanted to run away.
As someone who had once successfully run away from home, Eugene considered himself quite an expert at such things. He manifested as an omega when he was sixteen--quite late for today's standard--and after enduring abuse for seven months, decided to run away from home on the day he turned seventeen.
However, Eugene knew it was stupid to go before he became a legal adult, so he stuck it out for another year. During that one year, he acted like nothing was wrong; he endured the abuse, acting quiet and submissive, secretly collecting money and storing clothes inside a locker before finally running away on the day of his high school graduation.
No one suspected him, not even his omega mother.
Well, this situation wasn't that extreme. He wasn't planning to disappear completely, just get away from Arthur until the alpha forgot about his existence or took enough hints and erased his feelings altogether.
If he were to suddenly act cold or stop contacting Arthur while they still had to see each other often, the alpha would only pester him when they met or look for Sophie as a means of communication--just like how he did before.
After thinking about it thoroughly, Eugene decided to act normally while fulfilling his presence quota during local filming as fast as possible. Afterward, he would just drown himself in another work and use it as a reason to reject all invitations that came his way.
If everything went as planned, he wouldn't have to see Arthur until next year, at the very end of the post-production period. This time, he didn't even tell Sophie about it, not even letting it show in his face. Even if Arthur were to ask Sophie about him, she could only say Eugene was busy doing the job she introduced him to.
Seeing Arthur's brilliant smile during the drive, the plan seemed to be working well.
So what if he felt guilty? Smiling through bitterness and discomfort was something he always did well.
The estate they used as filming location had became several fold busier with all the filming crew and equipment on site, not to mention the actors' vans and trailers. With an actually functioning dorm for the manor staff, that particular building had been transformed into a temporary production office, staff accommodation, and cafeteria. Rather than ordering a catering service every day, Ashley called a catering team and had them cook on-site, providing a freshly cooked meal for all the staff and actors.
Perhaps that was why Eugene could feel the great atmosphere on the site. Well...it was also just starting. Who knew how it would be once it reached the middle, and everyone had become tired of retakes and a messy sleeping schedule.
Eugene was grateful that he did not work in the entertainment industry. He didn't exactly have a healthy sleeping schedule, but at least he could do it from the comfort of his own place.
To avoid getting accidentally captured in some behind-the-scenes footage, Eugene had no choice but to dress like celebrities, however. Not the fashion-savvy type, but the 'hide your face with a hat and glasses' type. He considered using a medical mask initially, but Ashley said it would be too eye-catching, so Eugene merely stored the mask in his pocket.
Too bad the filming started in spring; if it were during winter, Eugene could just use a thick scarf to hide his lower face.
Since his office worker attire would be weird with a hat, Eugene came in casual clothes instead: a shirt and a flannel with jeans, just like any other filming staff. His cold but delicate visage, however, was eye-catching enough even while half hidden by the shadow of his hat. In fact, that appearance reminded Ashley of the storyboard for the scene they'd shot in the city next month, where the protagonist was trying to blend into society as a normal person.
A young master who had to struggle with the difficulty of low ranking society for the first time.
"Honestly, I was tempted to offer you the protagonist role itself," Ashley said in greeting.
"Thank God it had never been brought up," Eugene replied with a genuine breath of relief. Besides, if people knew the author who never acted before became the protagonist, they would smite the movie to oblivion.
Ashley chuckled. "Our choice is pretty good," she said, gesturing toward the living room with her chin. Just like before, they watched it from the second-floor gallery--of course, without obstructing the camera set up there. "I've talked to him to make sure the emotions are conveyed properly. He already made a sufficient character analysis on his own and ran it through with me."
"What am I doing here, then?" Eugene tilted his head. "I'm not keen on disturbing an actor's character analysis if you already deemed it sufficient."
"You're here to give me affirmation that the emotions that the actor and I wanted to convey are matching your imagination."
"Hmm..."
"All the scenes we'll take today, in my opinion, are the most important in terms of emotional play," Ashley said, no longer looking mischievous. "Even more than the romantic climax during that storm."
"I agree," Arthur the driver nodded quietly behind Eugene.
Indeed, it was the part that stirred Arthur's heart right away when he read it. Illian's state of mind jumped all over the place as he had to face extreme sorrow in the middle of anxiety due to his condition, followed by the harsh betrayal of his relatives, who threw him out of the family instead of soothing his grief.
He couldn't even express his anger and disgust because he was too exhausted from grieving, and the fury had to be trapped deep within his scarred heart, brewing coldly and quietly.
"It's easier to portray explosive emotion than the subdued version of it," Arthur said.
"We're going to use a lot of eye shots during the confrontation," Ashley said before glancing at the sound editor. "What sounds do you think we should use?"
"Nothing," Arthur replied quickly, as if he had mapped out all the sounds he would edit into the movie. "Total silence."
Ashley merely smiled in response, looking back toward the drawing room in satisfaction.
"Well... it also depends on the actor," Arthur added quietly, just in case the actors or their managers heard him. "If the acting is not sufficient, we can't help but use some heartwrenching sound effects."
Honestly, Eugene couldn't imagine the scene. He did not write how the character looked; he wrote how the character felt based on his devastation that day. And so, without realizing it, he got curious about how the scene would unfold from a third-person perspective.
Before long, the filming started. It was the scene where the relatives schemed together during and right after the funeral of the protagonist's parents. Eugene didn't even write about it because that chapter was filled with Illian's stream of consciousness, so the writers had full freedom in concocting the background drama.
The highlight, for Eugene, was the way the actors kept phasing between putting on a sad act and whispering among themselves with a sinister tone. He heard Ashley and Arthur discussing the sounds they should use again, and it seemed they were leaning toward a requiem symphony.
A sad music while a cruel conspiracy brewed was indeed bone-chilling--Eugene thought. It highlighted the cruelty and the darkness of the human mind.
"Haa...when faced with this kind of scene, I'm always wondering if a family could be this cruel to each other..."
Eugene heard some staff talking to each other in a hushed tone while watching the acts unfold.
"Heh, heh--that means you're lucky enough to have a nice family," someone replied.
"I still can see it between relatives. When you only see someone once or twice a year, it's no better than strangers, don't you think?" another one chimed in.
"Ehh..."
"But I can't imagine doing something so cruel to your immediate family members that you see every day," that person continued.
"Yeah," the first person replied with a sigh. "They should be the ones who love you unconditionally."
Eugene, who overheard their hushed discussion, couldn't help but smile cynically. "They must be young, huh?"
"Who? The part-timers?" Ashley looked at the crews that Eugene was observing earlier and flashed a knowing smile.
"Sometimes, the immediate family members are the cruelest of them all," Eugene smiled dryly. "The closer you are, the more they think they own you."
Arthur glanced at Eugene, who sounded both cold and sad while speaking. His glazed eyes, which seemed like they were looking at something distant, were deep and bitter.
Was he able to write those agonizing scenes because he had experienced them himself? Arthur couldn't help but wonder. He agreed, though: those with the closest blood ties were the cruelest to him, in his opinion.
Ashley hummed for a second before muttering. "Like Jude's family?"
Eugene smirked.
The inability to feel pheromone and the identity conflict were what he inserted to the protagonist, Illian. The way one's family treated their 'flawed' member, however, was strongly represented by Jude. After all, the relatives only used the infertility as a justification for throwing Illian away from the heir position. Jude's family, however, treated it as something disgusting.
Sure, they did not throw Jude away. But they proceeded to control the alpha and treated him as someone beneath them inside the house.
In the movie edition, however, since Jude was no longer 'flawed', this point was still represented by Illian.
"It's also cruel when they don't want to own you at all..." Arthur muttered quietly, prompting Eugene to glance at him in surprise.
Certainly, he didn't expect to hear it from the alpha whose grandfather seemed to love him very much. But then again, Arthur seemed to live separately from his parents.
Watching those scenes was indeed stirring some emotions within him, invoking what had been buried deep within his heart. He didn't talk much afterward, just watching the shoot with eyes hidden within the shadow of his hat.
Haa...perhaps he should choose another day to check the shoot.
But, well...he was there already, so he had to see 'Illian' faced the betrayal of the people he thought would be there to support him;
Watching Illian's expression crumple as he stared at the blank phone, waiting for his fiance to call him;
Watching the despair freeze as Illian's mind grew numb from the pain he could no longer express.
Staring at the actor's face on the director's screen, Eugene wondered what kind of face he had made that day.