Despite the half hour he spent hyping himself up before leaving the house, apprehension weighs heavily on Taehyeon. Last night he had nightmares about Bada ditching him. Horrors like that must have been exacerbated by the widening rift between Minjeong and Jeongwon. The two of them were inseparable (the fact they are in different classes excepted) so the developments over the past week have sowed doubts about the permanence of everything in Taehyeon's mind.
He trusts Bada not to ditch him, but he is also in the delicate state of mind where one might expect to see a pig fly. No way. Everything will be fine.
The fact that Bada said he'd see Taehyeon there instead of meeting up beforehand is nothing to worry about.
When Taehyeon gets off the bus he tries to relax. Today will be great. He's lucky enough to get to hang out with Lee Minjun two weekends in a row. Someone out there must be jealous of him. Taehyeon is a hottie. Even Lee Dongmin, who has a glamorous and sophisticated university girlfriend, says that Taehyeon is a hottie. Totally. Taehyeon can do anything. He just needs to have confidence. He must be doing something right to make Lee Minjun pity him. Today is going to be a great day.
Walking from the bus stop at Jamwon Han River Park, Taehyeon keeps looking around for anyone he might recognise. The cars on the road above rumble as they speed along. The wind accompanying Taehyeon as he walks along the underpass chills him through his parka. He might not even take it off when he pretends to be interested in sports if the weather is going to remain this overcast and cold.
This seems to be about where they agreed to meet up. Nobody Taehyeon recognises is at the benches. He checks the time. He's only ten minutes early yet he's the first one here. Sitting on a bench to wait is only a good idea for an eighth of a second. Like flames following a trail of oil, the dense cold chases its way up through Taehyeon's bum and along his spine. He decides to stand and rocks from foot to foot to keep his blood pumping warmth around his body.
Ten minutes crawls by. Taehyeon might be an icicle by the time anyone else arrives. Between the arctic chill and the gale force winds whooshing through the underpass, survival seems slim. The only thing Taehyeon can do is keep his body moving. There is nobody he knows around for now. It might be safe. Taehyeon joins the elderly exercisers using the outdoor gym.
The old people at the outdoor gym are more spritely than Taehyeon expects because he is struggling to move the cross trainer. The combined force of his arms and legs is nothing compared to steel, apparently. Surely these things were invented specifically so that they could be moved. Taehyeon strains and strains. He better have the world's biggest muscles after —
Taehyeon's arms whirl around to catch himself as he slips but he doesn't hit the floor. Far from it. He knocks into a mass that is solid, but not as solid as concrete or paving, and hears a soft 'oof!' as arms steady him.
"Sorry. I thought it would be helpful if I turned the resistance down."
Taehyeon looks in the direction of the deep and gentle voice. Not to be superficial but this doesn't look like the sort of person Taehyeon should be mad at.
"No, it's fine," Taehyeon says, his voice high and thin in his throat. "I'm sorry. It's my fault. I'm just clumsy."
"Is that why you're not on the basketball team?"
Taehyeon flinches and jolts away from the person holding him steady. It's Woobin, the most eligible offering at Eoleunjeol himself. Whilst stuttering his way through the sort of greeting someone sexy and cool might offer, Taehyeon notices the similarities between Eoleunjeol's ice prince (if nobody speaks about Woobin with that title, they really should start because it suits him. Although Taehyeon might only be thinking that as he is thawing through the current chill with his chagrin) and the man who messed with the cross trainer.
"Are you two brothers?"
"That's right," Woobin says in the soft sort of Eoleunjeol voice which makes Taehyeon strain his ears. "This is my older brother. He's meeting some friends today too."
"My dear little brother is really mean. He keeps accusing me of copying him when I already had plans to hang out at the Han River today."
Taehyeon smiles and nods, unsure of how he is supposed to joke along here. There are two very handsome people to impress and Taehyeon doesn't know who to appeal to more. This is silly. Taehyeon shouldn't be worried about either of them. Unless this is Bada's ploy to get Taehyeon a glamorous and sophisticated university boyfriend.
"Did you come here to have a date?" Taehyeon asks.
Woobin's brother laughs. "Aren't you a bit young to be worrying about that sort of thing? Once you've graduated from high school and can handle your university workload, you'll have time to go on dates with your girlfriend too."
Right. With his girlfriend. That's totally something Taehyeon will be looking forward to in a few years or so.
"Totally," Taehyeon croaks.
"We shouldn't keep you," Woobin says. He and his brother do some sort of secret handshake before parting ways.
And then Taehyeon is alone with Woobin. Whatever is going on at Eoleunjeol Technical College must be contagious because Taehyeon's voice is stuck in his throat. His head is void of thoughts aside from the things he really shouldn't say aloud. Woobin's brother is sauntering away without a care. He seems to have mistakenly taken Taehyeon's ability to speak along with him. This is awful. Taehyeon should say something so that Woobin doesn't think Taehyeon is the rude type with no interest in making new friends.
Taehyeon will make as many friends as he needs to for Bada's sake. That being said, he wouldn't mind his current friend materialising to save him from being embarrassing. Is being silent embarrassing? Taehyeon isn't sure but he feels embarrassed. He should be able to say something. Taehyeon managed to even open his mouth in front of Minjun. Being alone with Woobin is a new experience.
"Do you know how to play basketball?" Woobin asks in a voice soft enough to be confused for the frigid autumn breeze. Unbelievable. A shy Eoleunjeol boy is taking the initiative. Taehyeon doesn't know who he is anymore.
He shakes his head.
"I think Minjun said that he will be bringing the ball for us to play with," Woobin explains.
"Okay. Cool."
"Yeah."
Great. Taehyeon really has lost his ability to say anything. There are so many things he could have said but he went with 'okay, cool' like the least cool person in the world. He will definitely die alone.
Bada eventually arrives, though it will be a long while before Taehyeon can lament his solitary future. Pilgyu and Siwoo arrive with him and Taehyeon pretends he knows which one is which. Aside from being waiflike, the two don't resemble each other at all but Taehyeon still doesn't know how to distinguish between them. Over the week, there have been sporadic messages and fragments of conversation but Taehyeon can't put faces to names. Before arriving, Taehyeon was confident that he'd manage to just work it out as he went along. His newly discovered inability to be normal has already dashed those hopes.
After an uncomfortably stilted round of greetings, only Bada seems to be able to speak properly. Unfortunately for everyone, Bada's usual speaking ability is equally as awkward as Taehyeon's involuntary mutism.
Halfway through a non-explanation about why he turned up relatively late, he attempts to comment on everyone's outfits. He gets no further than the observation that they're all wearing coats before he chuckles about the weather and subsequently stops speaking. Oh, this poor, handsome fool.
Hardly anyone is saying anything. At least Taehyeon isn't the only one who is too stupid to open his mouth.
A near familiar sound echoes against the concrete all around them. The benches and the outdoor gym are all beneath the wide road above. The acoustics are wonderful for oddly haunting sounds which chill the air in Taehyeon's chest.
"I'm here! I'm here! I'm not late!" are the words above the slap of footsteps echoing throughout the wide underpass.
Great. Minjun is here. Of course he was always supposed to be here, but that doesn't mean that Taehyeon should be glad of the presence of someone else who can watch him act like a complete idiot.
Minjun skids to a stop at the loose semi-circle the group has formed. He grins whilst smiling and greeting everyone.
"I thought you were bringing the basketball," Taehyeon says. He hasn't lost the ability to speak after all. Minjun's face falls and he holds his hands out as though he is holding a basketball and flutters his fingers for a moment.
"Oh. I forgot it."
Minjun scratches the back of his head. He looks at a loss as he glances around at everyone. Taehyeon takes stock of the situation too. Whoever is standing on Bada's left with the pointy, pale face looks relieved, if anything. Taehyeon counts himself as relieved too.
"That's okay," Taehyeon says as decisively as he can. "We can do something else."
"It's really okay?" Minjun asks.
"Yeah. We can do, like… something else we can think about. It doesn't matter."
"I was really looking forward to learning how to play," the kid on Bada's right pipes up.
"But Taehyeon said it's okay," Minjun says.
For one long moment, nobody says anything. Unlike before, Taehyeon doesn't think his gums are stuck together because of contagious shyness. Minjun sounds completely serious and Taehyeon has no idea what he is meant to say to that.
Hazarding a glance at Bada, Taehyeon sees an irritated expression. There is no way that Bada should be the first to speak if he can manage it. Whilst Bada is timid, he's not somebody who will keep his mouth shut forever.
"Let's go on a walk." The words are hoarse and raspy as Taehyeon forces them out of his mouth. At least he managed to say something. It is unlikely that a crisis has totally been averted but nobody else is saying a word about it right now. Minjun, for one, looks very happy as he decides to skip across the loose semicircle and squeeze into the space between Taehyeon and Woobin.
"Where do you want to go?"
This is a question that Taehyeon isn't equipped to answer right now. His mouth has stopped working again. Minjun isn't just close to Taehyeon, he's even resting his hand on Taehyeon's shoulder. Taehyeon remembers last weekend when Minjun practically held his hand, yet this is somehow even more cloying than that.
"Are you alright?" Taehyeon hears Woobin ask. In truth, he's not alright at all. He is about to combust without even having a proper first kiss with someone he likes.
This is a terrible time to realise it, but Taehyeon has so many regrets. There were so many things that he never got to—
"Aren't you coming with us?"
"Come on," Minjun prompts whilst pointing at everyone else who has seemingly started this walk without them. "Did you get too cold to move? Here, have my coat."
"No, thank you," Taehyeon whispers. This is somehow even more embarrassing than just a few seconds before. Minjun at least stops trying to take his coat off and walks in step with Taehyeon to catch up to the others.