Blood.
The fragrance of blood surrounds our home.
Elicia and Kallian stop after seeing me do the same.
My mind goes blank for a few seconds after the mere realization of the possibilities.
No. No. No.
Please don't be what I am thinking.
I shake terribly as I couldn't help but continue to walk. The two of them remain still.
Aunt Ama and Anna please be safe. I have found happiness after so long, please don't ruin it by not being alright.
I take deep breaths, trying to exhale out the fear and negative thoughts.
It is not like I only like Elicia; Aunt Ama is the person that provided home when I became an orphan, Anna is so innocent, so sweet that I cannot imagine something bad happening to her.
They are too good to be hurt in any way.
It will be fine. It has to be fine.
A step to our home.
Another step to the only place I felt warmth in.
Third step to the place that has the possibility of becoming a nightmare.
Damn it-it's taking too long to reach there by walking. I cannot help but have negative thoughts.
With that, I sprint towards our home.
Please-
A dead body lies in the corner, covered in blood.
I stop breathing for a second before realizing it's a man.
Thank goodness, it is not-
Why is there a man's dead body?!
I continue to sprint.
The interior of our home comes to my vision.
Blood.
The floor is covered by it. It cannot all be the blood of a single man-
The blood trails to a body-this time, it's of a woman-
It's aunt Ama.
She is stabbed by a knife in her back.
The bodies of several men lie next to her.
"No. No. No." I mutter while shaking my head, refusing to believe the scene in front of me to be real.
It's all a nightmare. I hope it's a nightmare.
Her black long hair is now drenched in blood.
It's too bad to even be a nightmare.
I drop to my knees.
The scene in front of me seems too real for a dream.
It's a dream, right?
Tears gather in the edge of my eyes before running down my cheeks.
It's just a dream, so why am I crying?
It is a dream…only a dream.
My heart aches like it never had when I realized it.
I am just running from reality by calling it a dream.
All I wanted was to live a happy life with them.
So why?
It wasn't something impossible. Maybe it was as it is now.
She was lovely, sweet and many things that words cannot tell. So why? Why to her?
She was someone special.
She was too sweet for this world.
Just a moment ago, she was laughing and chattering with me and now?
What could have possibly been here?
Where is Anna? She is not here, maybe at least she is safe.
She was like my mother when mine couldn't.
Tears after tears run down my cheeks.
Seeing her like this terribly resembles my mother when I killed her with that man.
The difference is, I didn't feel anything for my mother except some guilt while for her-it's the total opposite.
My mother was no different from a devil. Maybe even devils will be better.
What in the world happened here?
Did these men do this to her?
Nah, one man would be enough so why eight?
Even if there were eight men to kill her, then who killed them?
It's not possible that she alone killed them all.
"Arnold!" Elicia screamed, "What the hell are you doing?" She walked towards me, "What happened?"
Oh Elicia, only if I had the courage to accept this myself, let alone telling you.
She is coming closer, lessening the distance between us with every step-
"W-Why are you crying Arnold?" She asks hesitantly before her eyes roll to her house, which is no longer any different from an unknown place without Aunt Ama and Anna to make it warm.
Her mouth falls slightly open in something I cannot describe with words. Her eyes calculate the scene in front of her.
A tear runs down her cheek.
Another tear follows the first one.
Kallian hesitates to come see for himself, the reason for our behaviour. But he comes anyway.
Elicia shakes her head in shock, "It's only a dream" She repeats and repeats the same statement until her voice cracks so bad that it becomes hard to understand what she is saying.
"It's not a dream, Elicia, it's the truth." I speak to make her believe the reality.
"You're lying!" Elicia fights back, it's different. Her voice. It was never so ranged, so scared, even in the bed of death, it was nowhere near this. And then, she's sprinting towards Aunt Ama's body.
I rub the tears off my face before I follow her steps.
If I would cry, then who would give Elicia a shoulder to cry on.
With each step, Aunt Ama's face becomes clearer. Her wound is deep; I cannot imagine the pain she would've felt when the dagger was pressed against her ribs, yet she bravely faced it seeing that there is no sign of fear or tear on her still face- even if there was then it doesn't mean she didn't face it bravely.
Elicia hurries to reach her before shaking her gently in an effort to wake her up like she's just sleeping.
I wish she was.
Only if I have been here instead of insisting to dance with Elicia.
It is all my mistake.
All mine.
"Mother-no…" Elicia says while shaking her, her voice cracks as she continues, "Mama…please wake up!" Another tear rolls down her cheek and falls on Aunt Ama's face.
It's my first time listening to Elicia call Aunt Ama as Mama and not mother. It never seemed like they had a good bond.
Only if-
A pair of green eyes flutter open. She's alive.
She's alive. She's alive. She's alive. She is alive. She's alive. She's alive. She. Is. Alive.
Thank Goodness.
A tear once again runs down my cheeks, but this time it's out of happiness.
Oh god, I am turning into a cry baby ever since leaving the jail.
Elicia's eyes fly wide open on the sight of her mother being alive which alone is a miracle.
She doesn't waste a second before hugging her mother. Her hands round the neck of Aunt Ama; Elicia sobs and now I am sure I was correct earlier about feeling this wouldn't be how Elicia will cry while being sad.
But she's happy now. Which is good.
"Thank goodness. Thank goodness. Thank Goodness…" Elicia repeats but every time it's quieter, every time it turns more and more like a whisper. More and more like a silent promise.
"Elicia…" Aunt Ama whispers, her voice is weak, but steady enough to understand. "…it hurts. Don't hug me so tight, girl. You will kill me before the wound does." Aunt Ama says in pain; her voice is like a whisper but steady, it's very surprising to hear someone hurt so seriously say something this nicely.
I open my mouth to tell Elicia to stop it and carry Aunt Ama to hospital but before I tell her, she herself stops hugging her and starts carrying her in her arms.
How can I forget I have always been the dumb one and she has been the smart one.
"Is she your mother?" asks Kallian, his face full of worry. I gave him a look. Like after everything has happened, he's literally asking this dumb question, like isn't it obvious?
He understood the assignment as soon as I gave him a look, "Oh, okay…" He says, his voice low.
And then suddenly, he's all serious and matured, which is good.
"Don't-" Blood spills from Aunt Ama's mouth as she coughs-the sight seems very similar to back then, it reminds me how Elicia coughed blood, how I was too weak to protect her, how pathetic I was-but one thing is clear, Elicia survived and Aunt Ama has to too.
Elicia's eyes widen at the sight of her mother coughing blood-it's almost like her body is here but her soul is anywhere else-somewhere scary. It's like she's reminded of something from the past she shouldn't have. Her past is still unknown to me but I prefer not to ask her because she never wanted to share it.
Another tear rolls down Elicia's cheek. "Don't talk." Elicia said to her mother, coldness clotting her voice. "Don't." She becomes more serious as she continues to speak while her voice raises with every word, "Don't cough blood like father! Don't cough blood like you're leaving me like him!"
Aunt Ama scans Elicia's face for a second before speaking, "I am going to die anyway, girl…" She coughs blood again, "…protect Anna, they've taken her, I don't know where but somewhere."
So that's why Anna is not here.
If they've taken her, then we can find her nearby as it seems they wouldn't have gone much far.
Aunt Ama thinks she is going to die but by the way she's speaking so well, she should be fine.
She pauses, and the next time she speaks it's more like a dying whistle, but what makes it better is the smile on her face, "I am going with-" She coughs, blood spills from her mouth to Elicia's face but Elicia doesn't even flinch-she shakes; she shakes like how she's doing ever since Aunt Ama started to cough blood.
Aunt Ama continues, "…your father and my husband." She pauses to pull her hand upwards and brush a strand behind Elicia's hair, "Take care of yourself, my lovely daughter. Promise me, you will live. Even in the darkest time remember yourself, be cheerful…and I know, you will find someone in the future or you have already found him…" She passes me a glance, which makes me blush hard but it isn't the time for this.
She continues, "…he will make you feel nice. Make you feel as yourself. Make your heart race. Make you laugh. Make you feel special. And many more things I don't have the time to say."
And then she's dead serious, "Even if something happens to Anna, don't blame yourself, move on, live cheerfully but remember take revenge because revenge isn't an option it's necessary, this is my last order to you…" Aunt Ama's hand reaches the back of Elicia's head and then, she pulls her hand towards her to whisper something in her ears that I manage to listen, "…you and I both know who did this, don't we?"
I cannot manage to see Elicia's face or eyes because of the strands falling on her face, but I am sure she's devastated.
"Remember, we're all always with you, my lovely daughter…" She hesitates to continue but she continues anyway, "Follow your dreams, become what you want…but in the fire of revenge don't let the dancer inside you die, live as Elicia when needed but never turn into Elicia, my lovely daughter…Stella."
And that's when I see it,
The unconditional love in her eyes.
The kind of love that I never got to see. The kind of love I never saw in her eyes before. The kind of love I am not familiar with.
She passes Elicia a smile that is nothing but full of love. She brushes Elicia's cheeks with her thumb as she continues to scan and mesmerize her face and then-
Her eyes close while her hand falls to the ground.
Wait, what-
She must have just passed out, there's no way she will die after speaking this nicely.
Elicia shakes intensely with shaky breaths, her hand goes to check her mother's breath and when she does, she falls to her knees; her face comes to my vision-she looks like she never had. So scared. So powerless. So-
"She-She's dead…" Elicia mutters.
I open my mouth to tell Elicia that she has gotten it wrong and-
In a blink, the air grows thin, it is hard to breathe; it's cold-it's freezing. And when I open my eyes-
I understand where the ice came from that time.
Ice covers the whole house-no, the whole street.
While Elicia lies on the ground. Unconscious.