CHAPTER 16
We all have a responsibility and role to play in our families but in Norther Nigeria being a first child I really had a lot of responsibilities to deal with, its almost as though the family responsibility is resting on your shoulders. You will have to think for every other person, fight and listen to them, hold their hands when they are in their low moment and most especially be the gap between the parent's and the children, I bet its very exhausting and tiring. Amidst all of these things am almost forgetting my purpose, it was almost like I stopped living, nothing about me mattered to anyone, its was always about what Someone will take from me, life became all about the people around and I was left with nothing. I am almost twenty two years with nothing to show for It asides responsibility that was way bigger than me, even the school I was holding on to I had to drop out "hmm it is well and maybe this is my reality" I said and snapped back to real life and boom it was almost raining normally am supposed to be excited but I wasn't; I remember last year before the raining season ended the was a part of our roof that was not just licking but pouring and this rain seemed heavy, the clouds were really dark and this was going to be a mighty down pour but what were we going to do or rather where were we going to by this time of the night "mummy wake up, its about to rain" my mother got up so confused "Simi what do we do now" i was as confused as she was but i had to stay calm for both of us "lets just hope this doesn't get as bad as it looks" i said "but even if it does we'll stay in the kitchen and wait because are not going to wake people in their houses this night" i continued, just to prepare her mind and she just smiled at me and she held me close and said "i am proud of you my dear child". It was drizzling at this point and we just sat there either waiting for the rain to stop or get worst, it was at this point that i knew we can't stay here anymore and i had to do something and that was urgent.
The rain didn't stop and it didn't continue either, it was just drizzling and we just hoped it remained like that, since it was the first rain in a very long while the rain was windy and dusty and also very cold so we wrapped in each others arms, i remember how a family of five had become just the two of us, like how did we get here? if daddy was here, no matter what time it was he would have been trying to find a way to make us feel comfortable. My dad was such a caring man, he showed that in everything he did for us and our mother all my dad ever wanted was to give us a better life, like make us feel very comfortable but life always had a way of making him feel he wasn't doing enough was he going to give up? no! h e kept on pushing, i loved my dad so much that's why i believe there was a mix-up somewhere but my mother had said she doesn't want anything to do with that particular incidence and i respected that.
We hardly had some sleep that night because we were so worried and scared if we slept the rain was going to wet us so we stayed up and kept watch, different thought cross my mind but in the middle of my thought i heard my mother crying "i miss my family" she said "i know mother" with tears running down my face too "we all miss them so much and am sure they miss us too" she just held me tight and said "thank you for staying Simi" i broke more in tears hearing those words from her, it meant so much to me that she saw and appreciated the sacrifices i was doing for the family.
The weather was almost calm and we were ready to sleep in the early hours of the morning, my mom had told me the story of my birth for the 200th time in my twenty one years on earth but the thing is each time she shared the story with me i see more reasons why i had to make her happy and proud for not giving up on me and our family. For now we had to sleep, we had a very long day ahead of us tomorrow because we needed to fix this roof urgently or even leave this environment either ways funds is required.
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