AOT 2 - The Terror of Option

The following months blurred into a cycle of labor and learning. The operation to reclaim Wall Maria was a complete and utter failure. The refugees who were sent to their "glorious" mission were simply Titan food. The return of what remained of the Survey Corps was met with a grim silence. They came back with fewer soldiers and more horror stories. Of the 250,000 'soldiers' who left for Wall Maria, only a few hundred returned. The news spread through the camp like a plague, leaving behind a trail of despair. But you also learned something else. Something that made your blood boil. But it had also made you even more aware of the world around you, and the people who inhabited it.

Only a few had complained about the whole affair, only those with a family to lose; the rest? The rest were happy to have one less mouth to feed. You saw them. The ones who would look at the returning refugees with a mix of pity and relief. Relief that their rations would last a little longer. You saw them, and you understood. You didn't forgive them, but you understood. The world was a cruel place, and the people in it did what they had to do to survive. Not even your parents or any of your friend's said anything....This world and its inhabitants needed to be changed.

The only ray of sunshine through it all was Adelaide, who now had a small stall in the Trost market, thanks to her cousin's influence. She sold bread. Simple, crusty bread that smelled of home. Of a home that no longer existed. She gave you and your family a discount. A small gesture, but it meant the world. Sometimes she'd slip you an extra roll, her fingers brushing against yours, a quick, fleeting touch.

"You're getting a bit too tall," She complained, puffing her face as she pouted at you. "Soon, I won't be able to see you over the counter."

------------>

You just smiled, leaning against the stall. The wood was warm from the afternoon sun. "I'll make sure to crouch."

She laughed. It was a light, airy sound. "You'd better." Her face flushed, and she turned away, pretending to arrange the loaves of bread. You watched her, the way she tucked a stray strand of blonde ponytail hair behind her ear, while her small hands, dusted with flour, moved with her usual grace.

"So you are going to training camp," Adelaide said, her back still to you. She was trying to sound casual, but you heard the slight tremor in her voice.

"We are," you replied.

She turned around. Her blue eyes were wide. "Both of you?"

"Both of us," Emelina's voice came from behind you. She appeared at your side, as she usually did, a silent, watchful presence. "You didn't think we'd let him go alone, did you?" She picked up a roll from the basket, tossing it in the air and catching it. "Someone has to make sure he is looking after his head."

You ignored her. You were looking at Adelaide. Her hands were clutching the edge of the counter. "I heard that many cadets don't make it," she said, her voice barely a whisper. "The training... It's very hard, and fighting Titans is not for everyone."

Emelina took a bite of the roll. "I'm not worried," she said, chewing. "Our secret weapon is that thickhead of his." She nudged you with her elbow. "And I have my skills."

Adelaide didn't look at Emelina. Her eyes were fixed on you. "You will be careful, won't you?" Her fingers tightened on the wood. "You promise?"

"I promise," You said.

She let out a breath. Then she reached under the counter and brought out a small, carefully wrapped package. "Here," she said, pressing it into your hands. "For the road. A little something from your favorite baker."

Emelina stared at the roll of bread and then stared at the eyes of Adaleida, using her usual confident smile but with a hint of extreme coldness in them, "Have you thought about joining as well? I am sure they would love to have another strong person in the ranks." She said, her tone charming and carefree.

Adelaide's face paled. "Oh, I... I couldn't. I'm not..." She looked down at her hands, now free of the package. "My parents need my help at the stall."

"Of course," Emelina said, her smile unwavering. "But I've heard that cadets fall in love all the time in training ground, who knows, maybe Conrad will return with a lovely bride," Emelina added, with a wink. "Of course, I need to approve of her."

"Stop teasing, Emelina." You said as you held the bread in your hands. You looked at Adelaide. "Thank you."

Adelaide's cheeks flushed. "It's nothing," she mumbled, still not meeting your gaze. "But maybe... I could go with you..." She said, but then her father came from behind the stall.

"Now, now, that is enough chatter from you lot." Adelaide's father said, with a good-natured but firm tone. "Conrad, Emelina, you both take care of yourselves, you hear me?" He said, patting you both on the shoulder. "And Adelaide, get back to work."

Before you could say anything to Emelina, Eren came rushing to you. "There you are! We were waiting for you!" He said, and you saw Mikasa with him, as well as Armin, who had a small bag full of books. "They have opened the inscriptions. We should go now before the line gets too long!"

"Fine by me," Emelina said, as she gave one last look to Adelaide, who had a mixture of relief and disappointment on her face. Your sister took your arm. "Let's go, brother."

You walked away from the stall, the bread in your hand feeling heavier than it should. You looked back one last time. Adelaide was watching you go, her hands resting on the counter. She muttered something to herself, but you couldn't make out what. She put on her perfect smile as a client came to her stall.

-------------->

You faced forward again, your eyes scanning the crowded street. The sign for the recruitment office was a simple wooden board, painted with the three symbols of the military. The Military Police, with its unicorn, the Survey Corps with its wings of fredom and the Garrison with two roses.

The line was already snaking around the corner. Young men and women, their faces a mixture of determination and youthful confidence. All that was needed was a signature to join the training corps; many chose to join out of desperation, for a steady meal and a roof over their heads. Others, like you and your friends, had different reasons.

"You're really going through with this," Eren said, though it was more of a statement than a question. He looked at you, then at Emelina. He had finally grown a little bit, but he was still shorter than you, and you still had more muscle. "You know...It feels so long since we promised to join the military."

"A promise is a promise," You said, your eyes fixed on the line ahead.

"Plus," Emelina added, "I'm sure the Military Police is always looking for capable recruits."

"We are joining the Survey Corps!" Eren's shout drew a few stares. A woman in line shushed him, her finger to her lips. Still, it was clear he was excited about it. "Mother may not approve, but...I have to do this for my father and for everyone who died."

Armin merely laughed, "As long as we are all together, we can do it!"

Soon, the line began to advance. You watched as recruits stepped up, signed their names, and were handed a piece of paper with a number on it. Then it was Eren's turn. He grabbed the quill, his knuckles white, and scratched his name onto the sheet. The ink bled into the paper, a dark, permanent stain. He took the numbered slip, a triumphant grin on his face.

Armin went next, his hand shaking as he wrote. He looked at the paper as if it were a holy text. Then Mikasa. She moved quietly, and without many words, she placed her name on the paper, her expression unchanged.

Then it was your turn. The man on the stall took a good look at you, your muscles, and your height. He whistled low. "Strong ones this year." He said, pushing the paper forward.

You took the quill. The feather was soft against your fingers. You wrote your name and surname. Conrad Almonacid. The letters felt heavy. Final. You took the slip. Number 184.

Then it was Emelina's turn. She took the quill, quickly signed her name, and took the slip. "Now that's done," She said with a stretch.

That was it. You were in. The five of you stood there for a moment, holding your numbered slips, a silent bond forming between you. The sounds of the market faded into the background. You would soon be recruits preparing to fight against the Titans. The enemy of mankind. The memories of Griffin returned to your head, but this time, they did not cause fear or panic; instead, you remember the last smile he gave someone like you. You made a silent vow to learn and to become stronger.

***

That night, you said your goodbyes to your mother and father; everyone did the same. They knew that they couldn't change your mind, and so they accepted your decision, though they really wished you to consider joining the military police just as your sister said, instead of the Survey Corps. With the formalities and hugs of appreciation, your journey could finally begin.

The journey to the Training Corps facility was a long one. A rickety carriage, packed with other nervous recruits, jostling along a dusty road. The sun beat down, the air thick with the smell of sweat and fear. You sat next to Emelina, her shoulder pressed against yours. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin sat across from you, their faces showing different degrees of excitement and anxiety. The landscape outside was a vast sea of green fields and distant hills. You saw the walls of Trost shrink in the distance, until they were just a line on the horizon.

Inside the carriage, you noticed a hooded figure reading a book in the corner, or at least, attempting to be discreet. Whenever you looked in their direction, they immediately hid it themselves under the cloak. 'What a strange person, you thought to yourself. You looked away.

The carriage stopped with a lurch. The driver shouted something unintelligible. The fabric around the carriage was pulled away, and a blinding light entered the carriage, causing some of the recruits to grunt in discomfort. The Training Corps facility sprawled before you, a collection of imposing wooden buildings surrounded by high, iron fences. Guards in uniform stood at the entrance, their expressions stern. You had arrived.

"Cadets! Fall in line!" A loud, booming voice cut through the chatter. A man with a severe face, a neatly trimmed mustache, and a glare that could curdle milk stood on a wooden platform, his hands clasped behind his back. "My name is Keith Shadies. I am your Chief Instructor. You are scum. You are the dregs of society, the lazy, the cowardly, and the desperate. But in here, you will be forged into soldiers. Or you will die trying. Now, move!"

The recruits scrambled to form rough lines, their previous bravado evaporating under Sadies's withering gaze. You found yourself standing between Eren and Emelina, the numbered slip in your hand feeling damp. You looked around at the other recruits. There were all sorts. Big, burly farm boys who looked like they could wrestle a bear. Scrawny city kids who looked like a strong wind would knock them over. Shadies moved across all of you, his boots crunching on the gravel.

"Pathetic!" he bellowed, stopping in front of a boy with a prominent nose. "What's your name, runt?"

"Jean Kirstein, sir," the boy said, trying to stand up straighter.

"Kirstein? What kind of name is that? You look like a horse. Got the brains of one, too. Do you think you can join the Military Police with that face? Get in line!" Shadies moved on, his attention finding another target. And this time, he spotted a hooded figure. The same from the carriage. "You! Hood! Take that off! This is not a masquerade ball!"

The figure froze for a second, then slowly lowered the hood. A cascade of light blonde hair tumbled out, framing a face that you knew far too well. It was Adelaide. She looked different. Her usual soft smile was gone, replaced by a tight, fearful line. Her eyes, wide and blue, darted around before landing on you. They widened even further, a silent apology and a desperate plea all at once.

---------------->

Shadies stared. Then a slow, cruel smile spread across his face. "Well, well. What do we have here? A little girl playing soldier. Did you get lost on your way to the kitchen, sweetheart?"

"Adelaide...?" Eren's jaw hung open. Next to him, Jean's mouth twisted into a smirk. Mikasa's gaze narrowed.

Adelaide's hands clenched into fists at her sides, the knuckles white. "I... I signed up, sir. I am a recruit."

Shadies laughed, a harsh, barking sound that made several of the younger cadets flinch. "A recruit? For what? To polish the soldiers' boots? To bake them cookies? This is the army, girl! We kill things here! We die here! What are you going to do? Hit a Titan with a rolling pin?"

Adelaide was embarrassed. Her face was now flushed. She didn't back down, though. She stood up a little straighter. "I can do it, sir."

Shadies's smile vanished. He took a step toward her, looming over her smaller frame. "You can do it? You think this is a game?" He shouted, and he poked her in the chest with his finger, not enough to push her, but enough to make her stumble back a bit, "Do you have any idea what it means to fight a Titan? To see your friends torn apart, their blood soaking into the dirt? To hear them scream as they're eaten alive?"

Your sister, Emelina, smirked at Adelaide's expense, but you saw the slight tightening around her eyes, and there was undeniable satisfaction in her. You also saw Jean snickering behind his hand.

"Yes, sir!" Adelaide's response was so loud, so clear, that it even silenced Jean's snickers. She looked directly at Shadies, her fear replaced by a defiant glare. She had found her voice. She looked at you for a split second, her eyes pleading. Then she looked away, her gaze fixed on the horizon.

Shadies stared at her, his expression unreadable. The whole courtyard was silent, all eyes on them. The tension was palpable. "Fine," he said, his voice flat, cold. Finding her determination good enough for now. Next, he went towards a girl eating a potato in the middle of the line, "And you! What do you think you're doing? This is not a picnic!"

You wondered if the words of Emelina had anything to do with her decision to join, but whatever the case, her decision had already been made, and her fate was now sealed. You couldn't help but feel a surge of...something. Not pride, not quite. Something more complicated. You saw Eren's face, a mixture of shock and admiration, but for whom? You couldn't tell. Mikasa's face was, as always, a blank slate. But you saw the way her hand moved to her scarf as usual.

-x-X-x-

Soon, the gathering was over, and you immediately walked over towards Adelaide. Your sister followed behind you, with a smirk on her face. You ignored her and instead placed your hands on her shoulders, "Adelaide..." You didn't know whether to ask her why she had joined or to tell her to go home. The whole thing was a mess.

Adelaide blushed at your hand, but she didn't move away, "I... I had to... I am not as weak as you think." She said, her words directed at you and your sister.

Emelina laughed, "Never said you were weak...But I am actually glad that you came." She said as she placed a hand on Adelaide's other shoulder. "The three of us back together, it's like old times." Though her smile was genuine, her words had a hidden meaning. A hidden meaning that you could barely decipher. Still, there was a part of you that was glad that she was here. That you wouldn't be alone in this. A small part of you. The other was worried about her. You had always been the one to save her. What if you couldn't? What if you failed?

"Eren's going to be ecstatic about this, you know," You say, trying to break the ice.

Adelaide flushed. "Maybe...I am not sure, but I-I...am willing to do what it takes to help humanity. Is it as you said, right? We all have to do our part." She said, her eyes looking at the other recruits with a newfound sense of determination.

"Conrad's right," Emelina said, her arm now wrapping around Adelaide's shoulders, pulling her close. "But let's not get ahead of ourselves. We still have to survive training. And that... is going to be the real challenge."

The three of you stood there for a moment. Then the horn blew, a long, mournful sound that signaled the end of the day's orientation. You were ushered towards the barracks, a long, low building that smelled of old wood and disinfectant. Bunk beds lined the walls, three high. You were assigned to one, with Eren and Armin on the bunks below you. Emelina and Adelaide were in the room with the other girls.

Across you was Reinier Braun, a tall, muscular boy with a kind smile. He nodded at you as you settled in, "Name's Reiner and this is Bertholdt," He said, pointing to the tall but silent boy next to him.

"Conrad," You replied, your gaze falling on the lanky boy beside him, Bertholdt Hoover. He smiled weakly and with a small bow of his head.

"A pleasure to meet you, the name is Bertholdt Hoover." He said with a deep, quiet voice.

"So you are the guys from Shiganshina, right?" Reiner asked.

Eren nodded, "The name's Eren Jaeger! We're going to join the Survey Corps!"

Reiner whistled, "The Survey Corps, huh? Brave." He said, who seemed a bit surprised by the excitement being shown. "Forgive me for asking, but I've heard that it was a massacre in Shiganshina. How did you manage to get out?"

Eren was about to open his mouth to boast when you answered instead, "With luck." You said, your tone flat.

"A-ha," Reiner said, his eyes wandering for a second before presenting his usual smile. "Well, luck or not, it is good that you made it out. We are from the same village as Bertholdt. We are here to make a difference."

"We all are," You said, looking at him. You saw something in his eyes. A flicker of something you couldn't quite place. It was gone as quickly as it appeared. "The only difference is the price we are willing to pay."

"I suppose that's true," Reiner said, a more serious expression on his face. He looked at Bertholdt, who simply nodded.

Eren, unable to contain himself any longer, cut in. "You mean dead...I am willing to pay that price, but we are all here to become the best warriors of humanity and kill all Titans!"

Eren's declaration hung in the air, a bit too loud for the cramped barracks. A few heads turned from neighboring bunks. Reiner's smile returned, but it seemed forced this time. "That's the spirit. We'll need that."

Eren and Armin began talking with Reiner and Berthold for a long while; meanwhile, you only listened to the talk about their hometown and decision to join the training corps; soon, however, the bell of dinner chimed across the grounds, a harsh, metallic clang that rattled the windows.

"Dinner!" Eren shouted, already halfway to the door. "Let's go! I'm starving!"

You followed him out of the barracks, the other recruits flooding out behind you. The mess hall was a large wooden building with long tables filled with chattering cadets. The smell of boiled potatoes and stale bread filled the air. You and Eren found seats at a crowded table. Jean Kirstein was already there, boasting about how he was going to join the Military Police. "Why would you want to join the Survey Corps? It's a death sentence," he said, sneering at Eren.

"Because someone has to fight the Titans," Eren shot back, his face flushing with anger.

"And die for nothing? I'd rather live in the inner walls, eating steak every night."

"At least I won't be a coward hiding behind a wall!" Eren's voice rose above the din of the mess hall.

"You little—" Jean stood up, his fists clenched.

You merely let out a sigh as you watched them. You took a bite of the boiled potato. It was bland and mushy. The bread was hard. You ate it anyway. You needed the energy. Then, you saw Adelaide enter the mess hall. She shyly looked for a place to sit and found a spot near one of the emptier tables. Emelina, on the other hand, seemed to have already made friends, sitting with a group of girls, in particular, one blonde girl with blue eyes.

Emelina's piercing eyes stared back at yours, and you could tell that the people were already talking about the two silver-haired siblings in the camp. She smiled at you, a smile that was both charming and unsettling.

------------->

You turned your attention back to Eren and Jean. They were still arguing, their voices getting louder.

You could stay here eating, get closer to Adelaide, who seemed to throw glances your way, and talk to her, or you could go to your sister's table, and find out more about her new friends and how she was manipulating them already. Or, you could put an end to this argument between Eren and Jean and then go to the table with a group of your own.

-------------->

You decide to approach Adelaide, not wanting to leave her alone in this unfamiliar place. The argument between Eren and Jean provided the perfect distraction. While everyone's attention was on the two boys, you slid away from the table, your tray in hand. You crossed the mess hall, your boots scuffing on the wooden floorboards.

Adelaide was alone at her table, picking at a potato on her plate. She didn't notice you until you slid onto the bench opposite her. She jumped, her fork clattering against the tin plate.

"Conrad," she said, her eyes wide. But she relaxed upon your presence even as she sat a bit straighter. "I-I didn't see you there."

"I know," You said, placing your own tray down. You took a bite of your bread. It was hard, but it was food. "You shouldn't be sitting alone."

Her cheeks flushed. "I'm fine. I... I'm used to it." She lied, since she was used to being the center of the bakery. "It's just... a lot. The yelling... the instructor..." She looked down at her plate, her finger tracing the rim. "But you don't have to worry about me. I can handle it."

Perhaps she was right, or perhaps she wasn't. You couldn't help but feel the need to help her as you had always done. For a moment, you thought if you were doing the right thing. If you should be somewhere else. Not coddling her but letting her be. If she was serious about this...If your sister had not manipulated her into joining, then the only thing you could do was let her grow.

"I know you can handle it," you said. You pushed your tray of food towards her. "Here. I'm not that hungry." The lie felt heavy on your tongue.

She looked at the tray, then at you, her green eyes wide. "No, I couldn't. That's yours...and your muscles." She said, her hand going over to your arm, and you felt her fingers on your bicep.

"It's fine." You said, your arm flexing under her touch, not intentionally, but a natural response. She blushed and pulled her hand back.

"Still... I can't..." She insisted, her voice trailing off.

"Just take it," You said, pushing the tray closer. "I insist."

"Okay... Just this once." She finally relented, a small, hesitant smile on her face. She placed a single bite on her plate and started eating it with the slow deliberation of someone savoring a rare treat. You watched her, the way her small hands held the fork, the way her lips parted to take the food.

Then, you heard an unfamiliar voice as someone else sat down beside you. It was a girl with blonde hair and blue eyes, together with a bright smile, who appeared out of nowhere. "Is this seat taken?" She asked, though she already sat down.

Adelaide jumped again, almost dropping her fork.

"No," You said.

The girl nodded. She placed her tray on the table, and the food was barely touched. She looked at Adelaide, then at you. "I'm Krista Lenz, you must be Adelaide, right?" She said, extending her hand.

Adelaide hesitated, then shook it. "Yes."

"And you are Conrad Almonacid," Krista said, turning to you. "I've heard about you. Mostly from that guy," She said, pointing at Eren, currently face-to-face with Jean, "Said you were very strong."

"I bet that was a fun conversation," You replied, your tone dry.

Krista laughed softly and gently. "It was. He's... passionate. It's admirable." She took a bite of her own food, then looked at Adelaide, who had gone back to picking at her plate. "...Forgive me, but you remember that girl with the potato, right? The one Instructor Shadies called out?"

"I was there," You said.

Krista leaned in, putting on a bit of a smile and the face of a puppy, "She's been running laps since we got here. The instructor told her she wouldn't have any dinner. Poor thing. I was going to bring her some of my food, but I don't think it will be enough." Her eyes looked at yours and then at Adelaide, her blue eyes shining like pearls in the dark. "So I was wondering if... You know...?"

---------------->

Adelaide's head snapped up, her bread still in her hand. "Oh! You want to help her? That's so kind of you!" She said, her face brightening.

You looked at the extra food on your plate, and then at Krista. You knew what she wanted. She wanted your food, for a good cause, of course. But you couldn't help but wonder what else she wanted. Why would she approach you and Adelaide? Why not someone else? Still, you couldn't say no. Not to her.

"I don't mind, if Adelaide doesn't mind." You said, and she nodded her head in approval.

"Thank you!" Krista said, her face beaming. Hands clasped together as if she were praying to a minor god of baked goods. "You're both so kind! I'll bring it to her right away!" She gathered a little bit of your food from your plates and Adelaide's, balancing it precariously on her own tray. She stood up, gave a small bow, and hurried off toward the door of the mess hall.

You watched her go, her blonde hair bouncing with each step. Adelaide watched her too, a small smile on her face. "She's really nice," she said, her voice soft. "To think that she would worry so much about a stranger."

You didn't say anything. Though you couldn't really tell, that short blonde girl had managed to bring you to a better mood in some way. You turned your attention back to your own plate. You ate the rest of your food in silence, your mind wandering.

Eren and Jean's argument had finally died down, with both agreeing to disagree until the training truly started. As they sat back down, you caught Eren's eye. He gave you a small nod, as if to say 'we are in this together'. You nodded back.

Then, the dinner bell rang, signalling the end of the meal. As you all got up to leave, Adelaide tugged the hem of your shirt. "Conrad... wait a second."

You stopped. Eren and the others gave you a curious look before heading out of the mess hall, leaving you and Adelaide alone in the now-emptying hall.

"I... I wanted to thank you," she said, her hands twisting the fabric of her apron. A nervous habit. "For dinner. And... for everything." She looked up at you, her green eyes wide and earnest. "I know you think I shouldn't be here. That I am going to be a burden. But I want you to know that I am going to work hard. So hard that you won't have to worry about me anymore."

"I never thought you were a burden." You spoke the truth, after all, she was your friend.

A flicker of surprise crossed her face, followed by a look of relief. "Really?"

"Really."

She smiled giving you a hug, something she had not done since they were kids. She pressed her face against your chest. You could feel the warmth of her body through your shirt. "I have something I want to give you, a little special dessert my mother taught me. For you."

"Come to the warehouse shed in a bit, and I will give it to you," She said with a small blush on her face as she pulled away, and before you could say anything else, she walked away. You watched her go, her figure disappearing into the crowd of cadets. You stood there for a moment, the feeling of her body against yours lingering for a moment more than it should.

You decided to wait a little before following her, taking the long way around the training grounds. The night was cool, the air crisp with the scent of cut grass and distant woodsmoke. You passed the training grounds, the wooden dummies standing silent in the moonlight. You passed the barracks, the windows dark, the cadets already asleep.

You reached the warehouse shed. It was a small wooden building, used for storing training equipment. The door was ajar. You pushed it open, the hinges creaking in protest. However, given that most of the guards and instructors were too slow, they would never think that a cadet would dare to go in here after hours.

But your eyes widened when you saw her, adjusting her pants from below. Her pale and smooth skin from her lower hips to her ass cheeks was visible in the sliver of moonlight filtering through the dirty window. She must have been changing clothes to get more comfortable. Her back was to you, her hair cascading down her spine. You froze. Every instinct screamed at you to leave, to give her privacy, but you stayed for longer than you should have, and immediately, Adelaide gasped when she noticed you.

------------------>

She fumbled with her belt, her hands shaking. "C-Conrad! I didn't... I didn't hear you come in!" She stammered, her face red with embarrassment. She quickly pulled up her pants, her hands fumbling with the belt of her pants.

"Sorry," You said, turning around. You faced the wall. The rough wood was cool against your forehead. "I didn't mean to..."

"It's okay," she said, her voice small. "You can turn around now."

You did. She was fully dressed, her hands clasped in front of her. She was looking at the floor, her face still flushed. "I'm sorry about... that." She gestured vaguely at the corner where she had been changing. "I was just...checking if there were loose clothes to wear, you know...for comfort."

"It's fine," You said, your voice a bit rough.

She nodded. She turned and rummaged through a bag, pulling out a small, wrapped package. "Here," she said, holding it out to you. "This is for you."

You took it. The wrapping was a piece of clean cloth, tied with a string. The package was warm in your hands. You unwrapped it. Inside was a small pastry, glazed with honey and sprinkled with nuts. The smell of cinnamon and sugar filled the small space.

"My mother's recipe," Adelaide said, her voice soft. "She taught me how to make it. It's... special." She looked at you, her green eyes wide and earnest. "I wanted you to have it. As a thank you. For everything."

You broke off a piece of the pastry. It was sweet and sticky, the nuts adding a satisfying crunch. It was good. Better than good. "It's delicious," You said. The words felt inadequate.

A small smile touched her lips. "I'm glad you like it." She hesitated. "Conrad... can I ask you something?"

You nodded, your mouth full of pastry.

"Now that we are alone," She said, her voice soft as her hands fidgeted with one another as a sign of her nervousness. "...Don't you ever feel afraid?" A simple question, yet loaded with a world of unspoken fears. She looked at you, her gaze unwavering.

You finished the piece of pastry in your hand. The sugar clung to your fingers. You thought about Griffin's journal. You thought about the Smiling Titan. You thought about the Abnormal Titan that had nearly killed you. Fear. You knew fear intimately. You had drowned in it.

"Yes, I have." You answered, your own hands now moving to clean the stickiness from your fingers, but not before Adelaide took your hands in hers.

"L-Let me," She stammered, her hands moving to wipe your fingers with a clean cloth from her bag. Her touch was soft, gentle. The cloth was rough against your skin, but her touch was not. "You know... I think you were very brave back there. When you... When you saved me. Others weren't as brave as you, but they still made it."

You watched her. The way her brow furrowed in concentration as she cleaned your fingers. The way her bottom lip was caught between her teeth. She was trying so hard. So hard to be strong. So hard to be useful.

"I am trying to be brave, but I will tell you the truth...I ran away," She confessed, her eyes still downcast. "I left my parents a letter telling them that I would join the military. I didn't even say goodbye properly."

"Why?" You asked, your voice quiet. You weren't judging. You were just asking. The warehouse shed was silent, save for the distant hoot of an owl.

"Because I knew they would stop me," she said, finally looking up at you. Her eyes were filled with tears, but she didn't let them fall. "They would tell me that I'm not strong enough. That I'm not brave enough. That I should stay in the bakery where it's safe. And they would be right. I am not strong. I am not brave. But I want to be. But no matter what I do, I can't believe it...I am afraid...I am afraid all the time."

She paused. "Can you tell me, not to be afraid?"

You looked at her, and of course, there were a few ways you could answer her question.

For a moment, you wait and think before saying anything, allowing the moonlight to filter through the grimy windowpane, illuminating the dust motes dancing in the air. She needed the comfort of your words, the reassurance; you were not going to deny her that, but you could not allow her to be completely dependent on you. So, you chose a middle ground, the only one you truly believed in.

You looked down at Adelaide. The way her small hands, still stained with some of the flour from the dessert she had prepared, clutched at the cloth in her lap. Then you looked at her emerald green eyes and gave her a simple nod. "I don't think that will help at all."

Her face, which had been a mixture of hope and desperation, fell slightly. "W-What do you mean?"

"You don't get over fear, and I think you are already doing more than most people in the city. You came here, right?" You said, your gaze unwavering.

"I... I suppose so," she said, her hands clenching the cloth in her lap again.

"So, you can't just tell yourself not to be afraid, that is like telling your heart to stop beating. You can't. But you can be more afraid of something else." You explained, your mind recalling the final words of Griffin. He ran, not because he was a coward, but because he was afraid of failing his comrades, of dying without telling the world what he knew. "Find something you're more afraid to lose."

"What am I afraid to lose?" She asked, her brows furrowed, but still not understanding.

"Aren't you afraid of not seeing your father and mother again?" You asked.

She looked at the floor. "I am... I am..." Then, she looked at you, her eyes wide as a new thought occurred to her. "I am afraid of you getting hurt because of me."

The warehouse was silent for a moment. You didn't know if such honesty was all right, especially now that you were both training to be soldiers. You were no longer the boy who saved her from a falling beam. You were now a recruit, just like her.

You were about to say something, anything to break the silence, when the sound of footsteps echoed outside the shed. It was the crunch of boots on gravel.

"Someone's coming," You whispered, grabbing Adelaide's arm and pulling her towards the back of the shed, behind a stack of wooden crates. Your body pressed against hers, her back to your chest. Her hair smelled of cinnamon and sugar. In that moment, you did fear, and what you feared was getting caught. And you did not want Adelaide to get in trouble for this.

The door to the shed creaked open. A sliver of light cut through the darkness, illuminating a small patch of the floor. A figure stood silhouetted in the doorway. You held your breath. You could feel Adelaide's heart beating harder, faster. She instinctively pressed against your chest, but it also meant she pressed her hips and the softness beneath them against your groin. And you held her even tighter, as if protecting her from the outside world. The thought lasted less than a second, but it was there. A fleeting thought that made your own heart beat a little faster.

The figure took a step inside, the sound of their boots echoing in the quiet space. You could just make out the shape of a uniform in the dim light. A Garrison patrol. One of Shadis's night watchmen. But then...

"Hey! think I saw that potato girl eating! Didn't Shadis forbid her from dinner?" A male voice said from outside the shed, not too far away.

The uniformed figure in the doorway turned their head towards the sound. "What? Let's go check it out." The figure said, before turning around and leaving.

You let out a breath you didn't realize you had been holding for a while now. The footsteps retreated, the sound fading into the night. You and Adelaide remained hidden behind the crates, the silence of the shed pressing in on you, but then the pressing of her soft body against yours returned to your mind, and you quickly let go of her and took a step back.

She stumbled a bit, catching herself on the crate. "They're gone," she whispered, her voice shaky. She looked at you, her eyes wide in the dim light. "We... We were almost caught."

"We were," you said. You looked at her, at the way her hair was slightly tousled, at the flush that still colored her cheeks.

"But," Adelaide said, looking at you with new eyes, as if a sudden revelation had dawned on her. "You are right... I think I know what I'm most afraid of now..." She said with a newfound determination in her voice. She then adjusted her clothes, her hands moving with a newfound purpose.

"What?" You asked, your curiosity piqued.

She didn't answer right away. Instead, she smiled at you. "Its a secret." She said, with a playful and confident tone that you had never heard from her before. "Thank you, Conrad. For everything."

Then, as she was about to leave the shed, she paused at the doorway and turned back to you. "I think... I think I'm going to like it here." She said, before disappearing into the night, leaving you alone in the dark.

Once more, you were alone, standing in the middle of the warehouse shed. You looked at the empty space where she had been standing. You thought about her words. A secret. You wondered what she meant. But for now, your main concern was returning to the barracks without being caught.

-x-X-x-

As you walked, your mind wandered for a moment to what you had seen before; you were a young adult after all. The memory of her smooth, pale skin lingered, the curve of her hip, the way her body had felt against yours. You shook your head. Now was not the time...Though the fact that she had grown was not lost to you. However, as you sneaked past the guards, you saw what had caused the guards to go away in the first place.

One tanned girl with skin only a few tones lighter than yours was carrying, the potato girl who had most likely collapsed from exhaustion after being made to run an indeterminate number of laps around the training grounds. The tanned girl had a determined look on her face as she carried the other girl piggyback. If you remembered correctly, her name was Ymir, and the girl she was carrying was the one from the dinner hall—Sasha Braus.

Next to them was the petite girl from dinner, Krista. She smiled at Ymir as she carried Sasha back to the dormitories. It was clear that the tanned girl was putting quite an effort to bring the potato girl to safety, and Krista was cheering her on with a cheerful smile.

"You are doing great, Ymir! Almost there!" Krista said with a bright smile.

"Just a bit more... This girl is heavier than she looks," Ymir grumbled, but she still managed to pull fast enough to avoid one of the patrolling soldiers. Deciding that you had seen enough, you decided to get moving at the barracks, but as you did so. You saw Krista trip on a large rock. She covered her mouth instinctively to avoid making any sound; however, her skirt rose up and tore against a sharp piece of metal that jutted out of the fence. You saw the torn piece of fabric, the pale skin of her ass, and her white panties as she fell forward.

But you also saw something else. It was then that, when Krista looked behind her, she spotted you, as the moonlight illuminated your figure. She saw that you were looking at her exposed panties. But she didn't scream, even as her eyes widened. Instead, she looked at you for a split second before a slight, almost imperceptible blush graced her cheeks.

------------->

However, the small blush soon turned into a complete fire, and before Krista could get herself together, you had already disappeared from her view as you rushed to the barracks. What happened next was unknown to you, but you were sure that the girl would not tell anyone about what she had seen, and she probably expected you not to say anything either.

You soon arrived back at the barracks, and you made sure that Shadis wasn't around to check the rooms. You slowly entered the room and went to your bunk bed, careful not to make a sound. You stripped off your boots and shirt, the fabric sticking to your skin. The sheets were rough, but they were clean. You lie on your back, staring at the wooden slats of the bunk above you.

As you lay against the bed, you couldn't help but remember the two images of the two blonde girls you had seen tonight. Adelaide's smooth skin and her soft, round backside. And Krista's small, perky ass and her white panties. You...were going to have some trouble sleeping tonight; however, somehow you managed to muster the willpower to shut your eyes and drift towards sleep. The last thought you had before the next morning was 'why Griffin hadn't mentioned any of this in his journal?'

-x-X-x-

The next morning, the harsh blast of a trumpet awakened all of you to the reality of your training. As usual, Eren was the first to wake up and by extension, wake up everyone else. He practically flew out of his bunk, his excitement a palpable force in the early morning light.

"Hurry up! We're going to be late!" Eren shouted as he was putting on his uniform. "This is it! The first day of the rest of our lives!"

You sat up, rubbing the sleep from your eyes...Which was not normal at all, given the usual bountiful energy that you could muster at any moment throughout the day, but perhaps the events of last night had induced some level of lack of sleep. Regardless, you all headed to have breakfast.

What you were served was light, just water, a little bit of meat, and bread, enough to get you used to working for your lunch rather than having it served. You were going to be soldiers, not tourists, and the training was the first step. While you ate, you could see the other cadets chatting with each other, but you noticed a couple of glances your way. First, from your sister, who gave you a questioning look, but she didn't say a word; her smile, however, told you everything. She likely knew something.

Then, you noticed a couple of glances from Krista, who smiled at you as if nothing had happened. It was a bit strange, but you didn't pay it much mind. She was talking to the freckled girl, Ymir, and Sasha, the potato girl from last night. They all seemed to have become fast friends in the short amount of time they had been together.

Adelaide appeared last at the mess hall, and the moment she spotted you, she shyly gave you a small wave before going to get her food and sitting at the same table as yesterday, though she sat with Krista and her group this morning, who welcomed her warmly, with the exception of Ymir, who simply gave her a glance of indifference.

You then heard the bell for training.

***

The training grounds were vast; it seemed that they had been dug into the ground as a way to make them feel more isolated and intense. A dirt field, lined with wooden posts and targets, dummies for hand-to-hand combat, and an obstacle course that looked like it was designed by a sadist. As Shadis lined you all up for exercise, you noticed the way the wind swept through the open space, carrying with it the scent of sweat and damp earth. The sun beat down, its heat relentless.

It would be a while before you even got near the omnidirectional mobility gear. First, you had to learn how to be a soldier. How to march, how to stand at attention, how to obey orders without question. Shadis's voice soon became a constant reminder of the harshness of the training, but you always remembered Griffin's words. 'Sweat and tears, before blood and guts.'

Among the lessons was training of endurance meant to break each cadet down to their raw potential. Running. So much running. Lifting, carrying, going to eat, taking classes, and then running again. The monotony of the training was always broken before you could get used to it. Regardless, there were always those who did better than others, in particular, your sister, Mikasa, Reiner, and you; you all seemed to be the best in the class. Not that Shadis ever gave out compliments.

However, you did notice that Adelaide was doing better than you would have expected. Perhaps it was the determination in her eyes that you had seen that night when you all had to run laps. Or maybe it was the cheerful encouragement she got from Krista, who always seemed to be there when Adelaide needed a little push.

While everyone excelled in something, you were particularly fond of one aspect of the training. Perhaps it was the sheer physical training that made you want to push your limits and even surpass them. Another part of you saw the training manuals and maintenance of the omnidirectional gear as quite the exercise, while another part of you wanted you to help all your fellow cadets; though, the reality was that you had limited energy.

-x-X-x-

You decided to take a page out of the Griffins' book and help the other cadets as best you could. After all, weren't they struggling for the same reason you? Trying to fight back against the Titans, who had taken your home and forced humanity to resort to such extreme measures? Of course, you were no Griffin, at least, not yet, and so, you resorted to helping others only when it was really necessary.

One day, when the whole class of cadets went to try a rope climbing exercise around a tree, you saw Armin's fingers slip from the rope. His fingers had chaffed too much, and the rope left a trail of blood on the wood.

"Argh!" Armin grunted to himself, not wanting to attract any attention to his own failings. He tried to keep tight to the rope; he was close to the finishing line, but then...he lost grip and fell. "Ah!"

Thankfully, the rope wasn't that high. But you were not about to let one of your friends fall and risk an injury that could put them out of commission for the whole training. You let yourself slip from the tall tree and used your legs to brake as you reached for Armin's falling body.

"Whoa!" Eren shouted from below as he saw you go down. He had already finished and was watching the other cadets with a proud grin.

"Armin," You said as you grabbed him in mid-air; the momentum of his fall and your own made it hard for you to stop your descent, but you managed.

"Armin!" Mikasa's eyes widened, worried for her friend. The rest of the cadets were much of the same. "Are you alright?" Marco asked from the other side, while Jean shouted. "Just look at that guy, showing off...again," He complained.

"Conrad! Help him down," Krista's soft but clear voice called out from the ground. Her face was a mask of concern. She looked at you, her blue eyes pleading.

Adelaide also looked at you, her lips parted in a silent gasp. But she seemed to be worried for either of you; her eyes seemed confident that you had the situation handled.

"I...I am fine," He said, looking at the rope and then at the ground. "It's a bit higher than I thought," He said, eyes finally recognising the danger that he was in. "Gah—!" He finally reacted, his grip tightening around your arm as he remembered he was dangling in the air. His body tensed, and he squeezed you even tighter. "Maybe, I-I—" There was complete hesitation in his face, a moment of weakness if there was ever one. You noticed that self-doubt and hesitance were the worst enemies of a soldier.

"Don't think about it," You told him, your voice both firm but reassuring. You grabbed him tight and pulled him back to the tree trunk; your feet had pressed against the bark so hard that it splintered the very trunk a little.

Armin's eyes widened. He took your words in earnest, closing his eyes to avoid the sight of the height. "I-I won't!" He declared, more to himself than to you.

To the surprise of the other cadets, he resumed the climb. "He's climbing! He's actually climbing!" Someone shouted from below. You stayed below him for a while longer, your eyes scanning the way his hands grabbed onto the rope to make sure that he would not fall. The climb was agonisingly slow. Each pull of the rope, each push of his legs, was a visible struggle. He gritted his teeth, a small trickle of sweat running down his temple. But he did it. He reached the top. A collective cheer erupted from the ground.

Eren was practically jumping up and down. "He did it! Did you see, Mikasa? He did it!"

Mikasa's lips curved into the barest hint of a smile. It was there and then gone, a ghost of an expression. "He did," she said.

You dropped back to the ground, landing lightly. You looked at your hands. Your palms had barely suffered under the stress, while Armin's were clearly still painful to him. Nonetheless, as he descended, he smiled at you. "Thank you, Conrad." He said, as he held onto his raw hands. "I... I didn't think I could do it."

"You can always do more than you think," You said, echoing the sentiment that you had to see proven true not so long ago.

"That's what I keep telling him," Eren said, clapping Armin on the back, a bit too hard, as usual. "You just need to believe in yourself!"

Armin stumbled forward. "Eren!"

Shadis appeared out of nowhere, his boots crunching on the dirt. "What's all this celebrating? Did someone manage to expel the titans from Wall Maria? No? Then get back to training! All of you!"

As always, Shadis' voice resonated throughout the training grounds. The cadets all resumed their work in climbing; they did better than before, though, perhaps more motivated by the little heroics and the harsh words of the instructor.

Such small moments repeated themselves again and again, one time you helped Milieus and Nack correctly polish boots so that Shadis would stop nagging them about it. Another way you helped Marco keep a better balance as he walked along the top of the wooden beams to keep his core stable.

Another time, you managed to stop a horse from crushing Mina Caronina's leg after it was scared by the shouts of a few cadets. You simply grabbed the horse's bridle and pulled. The animal resisted, its muscles bunching under its brown coat. You held your ground, feet planted, your own muscles straining. The horse whinnied, shaking its head, but you didn't let go. You pulled again, harder this time, turning it away from Mina.

Mina stared, her hands still covering her face. The horse snorted, a hot blast of air against your arm. Then it calmed as it finally recovered its balance.

"You... you could have been hurt," Mina said, her hands slowly lowering from her face. Her eyes were wide.

"Or you could have been," You replied. You let go of the bridle, patting the horse's neck. "I don't mind a kick if it means you don't get one."

Mina's face flushed. "T-thank you!"

-------------->

Meanwhile, Jean, who witnessed the whole scene, couldn't help but 'bleh' at you once more for basically bragging about your uncanny ability to help others, "You know, you don't have to be a hero all the time. We are supposed to be competing against each other to be the best, no matter; I will get to the top 10 in no time."

"I don't see you complaining when I help you with the firewood," Reiner said, patting Jean on the back, a bit too hard, as usual.

Jean stumbled forward. "That's different! That's just... practical! This... this is... unnecessary."

Reiner patted him extra hard this time. Making, Jean wince. "Sure it is, Sure it is." He said with a wink. Then, Reiner looked at you, "But thank you, Conrad. For helping Mina."

You simply nodded as Mina kept giving you a look of gratitude before running with the other girls, including Adelaide and Krista, who were looking at you as well. As they got near, you heard Krista's cheerful words to Adelaide about you.

"Your friend sure is amazing, Adelaide!" Krista said. "He's so strong and kind, isn't he?"

"He is..." Adelaide said, her cheeks flushing. She looked at you, a shy smile playing on her lips.

Meanwhile, Emelina's eyes were unreadable every time you helped someone. You could not tell if she felt pride or disagreed with the actions you took to help your fellow cadets. Yet, she continued to play the role of a good sister and an excellent cadet, always excelling at the top of the class. There was one thing you did notice: she never needed help. She never even seemed to struggle. She kept a respectful distance from most of the cadets, only staying close with you and the other few kids of Shingashina. Her friendships were ever so selective.

But as she remained careful and quiet, each little act of help cemented you among the cadets, not only as the strong kid but also as the helpful one. Someone you could approach about your problems, the one who would help you with your baggage, the one who would push you to climb the rope even if your hands were raw and bloody. You were slowly building a small but loyal following among your peers. Even the cadet desertion rate seemed to have lowered since you joined the training.

You never ate alone, and more people seemed to be eager to eat at yours and Eren's table, including Krista, Sasha, and Ymir, though the latter only did so when she couldn't convince the blue-eyed girl otherwise. This much attention created a little jealousy from Adelaide, who used not to have to worry about any sort of competition for your attention. But this changed when she saw the other girls and their attempts at talking to you more often than usual.

Gossip between the girls began to circulate about the 'silver-haired siblings,' some calling you a kind soul and others calling Emelina an ice queen. Such attention made you uncomfortable. In a way, Emelina's distance from others was her own brand of manipulation; she cultivated an air of unapproachable perfection, making her seem more desirable, more interesting. It came to a point that you even heard their little conversation when you pretended to be asleep.

"All right, listen up," Jean whispered, huddled around a single flickering candle like he was planning a coup against the government. He looked at the circle of faces—Connie, Reiner, Bertholdt, and a reluctant Marco. "We need to settle this once and for all. The ranking."

"Ranking?" Connie blinked, rubbing his shaved head. "I thought we were ranking the instructors by how much their spit smells."

"No, you idiot," Jean hissed, glancing over his shoulder to make sure Shadies wasn't lurking in the shadows. "The girls. Specifically, the Big Three."

Reiner leaned back against the bunk frame, crossing his massive arms with a wistful sigh. "There's no debate. It's Krista. She's... she's the most charming and beautiful. Today, she handed me water after training, and I felt my whole soul get purified." He nodded his head as a sage who had just achieved profound wisdom.

The other boys stared at him for a second before bursting into a laugh. Reiner wasn't even angry about it, but he was still certain of his feelings for the "goddess" that he called Krista.

Jean smiled before he waved to dismiss the idea. "She's nice...Very nice...But...She is nice to everyone, and even the horses smile at her when she goes to the stables. I am talking about a real challenge, a beauty that would make the MPs in the inner district want to join the Survey Corps. A queen that only I could serve."

"I get it, I get it," Connie said, nodding along. "You mean Mikasa, right? She is scary, but her eyes, you know...They just make you want to protect her."

"She wouldn't need your protection; she would probably crush your skull instead," Reiner laughed. Then, he pointed at Marco. "What about you, Marco? Who do you think is the most beautiful?"

"I, well, uhm...I think..." Marco stammered, rubbing the back of his neck. "I think they are all... nice."

Jean sighed. "I guess you are right, and you too, Connie. Mikasa is a solid number 2. But the real number 1 is none other than Emelina! She has a charm that is just... She's just perfect! The way her silver hair moves when she runs...the way her smile...the way she looks at everyone, making them feel small, but not in a bad way...Just...Wow."

The others looked at each other, a bit surprised at his passionate description of your sister. Even Bertholdt raised an eyebrow.

"She's okay," Connie said, scratching his head. "A bit scary, though."

"She's not scary! She's...She's a queen, and at least, she is not obsessed like Mikasa with Eren," Jean said, a dreamy look on his face. "And did you see the way she handled her sword? I swear, the blade looked like an extension of her arm...I...I..." Jean's words faded into a soft sigh. The boys around him shared a look.

Reiner cleared his throat. "...I think we can all agree that you are just saying this, because she has not kicked your ass yet...Have you even talked to her?"

Jean's eyes withdrew from the obvious confrontation. "I-I've learned my lesson after Mikasa..." He says, defeated for the time being, "There will be plenty of cute girls in Wall Sina, anyway!" He says, trying to escape the conversation.

Reiner seemed to notice that you were not asleep, and so he decided bring you into the conversation. "Hey, Conrad. You are awake?" He said with a smirk. The rest of the boys turned to you.

You open your eyes slowly, the silence stretching. "I might have heard something." You said, sitting up. The wooden frame of your bunk creaked in protest.

A beat of silence. Then Jean exploded. "How much?!" Fearing for his life, perhaps.

"Not much." You decided to throw him a bone. Reiner's booming laugh filled the room, making Connie flinch.

"Well...Well, in any case, who do you think is the most beautiful, Conrad?" Reiner asked, a predatory grin on his face. "You have to pick one."

"I think..." You started, your mind wandering. Then realized you could not tell a soul about what you had seen the first night of the training. It may have biased you a little, but still, you gave them an answer.

But even you, as you swore to never tell what you had seen, even your quiet and stoic self, couldn't help but take the question seriously. Who was the most beautiful? 'That's a ridiculous question.' 'Beauty is a concept...' 'Griffin did rank girls of his squadron that one time...' '...' '...' 'Still...' 'The answer is clear.' 'There's no debate.' You looked at them with your usual, deadpan expression.

"Adelaide's is more impressive, but Krista's is more refined..." You trailed off, looking at the ceiling as if a deep thought had just left your own mouth. But as you looked at the rest of the squadron, you saw only half-opened mouths and a look of disbelief in their faces.

"EHHHH!!!" Everyone shouted at the same.

"What?" You asked, a bit confused by their reaction.

"What do you mean 'Adelaide's is impressive, but Krista's is more refined'?!" Jean practically shouted, almost falling off his bed.

"What d-do you mean by that?" Marco asked, with a nervous look on his face.

Reiner, on the other hand, seemed to be a little more comfortable with the conversation. "Only a true comrade would notice such things!" He declared, puffing out his chest.

You slowly scratched your head for a second. What you had said was the simple truth, as far as you were concerned. "I meant their bread, of course."

This answer did not satisfy the boys at all. In particular, Jean, who threw a pillow at you. "Don't give me that! You said 'Adelaide's is more impressive! What part of her do you find more impressive?! Her eyes? Her hair?! Her..."

"I think he really meant their bread," Connie said, scratching his head.

"Oh, right, when they are on cooking duty, they do make the best tasting bread and food," Jean replied calmly, seemingly forgetting that he had just been angry a second ago. "But still, it's weird to compare them like that...Hey! Don't mess around with me like that!" Jean said, recognizing the way he had just been played.

"Hey, hey, hey! Calm down! We are all men here!" Reiner laughed, but he was looking at you as if he had just figured out the greatest puzzle in the world. "But maybe he just has a refined taste! He wants to tell who would make the better wife." Reiner laughed once more until he realized that he also had considered the same thought. "Hmm....Krista is definitely... the wife type."

That single thought made all the other boys, including you, consider the same thought and nod in unison. This much united you all, and as much as you didn't want to participate, you couldn't help but think about the same thing. Hearing the words 'You are home early!' coming from Krista's mouth after you returned from an expedition would definitely put a smile on your face.

This small, dreamy idea made everyone's minds go a little wild. The mere thought of any of the girls as a potential wife made the rest of the boys sigh, even you.

"Okay, okay! I get it! This is enough for one night!" Jean said as he lay down in his bunk, trying to end the conversation.

"I guess I agree...Tomorrow's practice will be tough; we must sleep." Marco added, with a yawn.

"Night..." Connie said as he snuggled into his bed, soon followed by the other boys. Even Bertholdt seemed to be more relaxed than usual.

The barracks quieted down with the rustling sound of blankets being placed over their bodies, only for the tranquility to be replaced by Eren's usual loud voice and a stride that made him open the door to the room with such force that the whole room seemed to shake. "Hey, guys! Did you know that tomorrow, we have ODM training!" His voice showed all his excitement, but then he was met with a series of groans and shushing sounds.

"Shut up and go to sleep!" Jean shouted from under his pillow.

"Who are you telling to—!" Eren said, about to get into a verbal fight with Jean once more, but then he noticed the rest of the boys were trying to get some rest. "I understand..." He muttered.

"Let's go to sleep, Eren," Armin pleaded with him, his hands clasping together as if praying to Eren to stop arguing with the rest.

Soon, the entire room was enveloped in the silence of the night, with only the occasional snores and whispers of the wind outside the window. You turned over on your bunk, your thoughts still intruding into your mind. You couldn't get the conversations from earlier out of your head, the images of the different girls that you had met so far. 'Most fulfilling' and 'more refined'... your own words echoed in your mind. The bread. You had been talking about the bread. A half-truth. Convenient. You closed your eyes, trying to will the thoughts away once more.

***

The Girl's Barracks

At the opposite side of the training grounds, the girls' barracks were a mirror image of the boys', though it was more orderly and smelled better. It was nonetheless a time of gossip and secrets; after all, both the girls and boys shared one thing in common: they were all young and had an interest in the opposite sex.

Most of the girls were awake, all sitting in a circle with pillow thrones for them to sit on, all were illuminated by the gentle light of a lantern. Only Annie and Emelina seemed not to be part of the conversation.

"So...Addie," Mina Carolina, the black-haired girl with rosy cheeks and a cheerful personality, started the conversation with a teasing tone and a sparkle in her eyes. "You know Conrad the most, right? What kind of girl do you think he likes?" She asked a bit shyly, but was willing to get to the point.

The other girls giggled, with the exception of Ymir, Sasha, Krista, and, of course, Mikasa. Who seemed to be happy to be on the sidelines of this conversation for now.

"Minaaa...!" Hanna Diament, a freckled ginger, blushed and tried to shush her friend, "You shouldn't ask that kind of question!"

"Why not? We are all girls here! And she is from the same district as him! She must know something!" Mina replied, pointing at Adelaide. "I am just a little curious about him and..."

Adelaide's face turned a bright shade of red, a tomato in the lantern light. She clutched the pillow she was hugging so hard that the fabric strained. "I... I don't know! We were always friends since...since...H-He..." Her words were a jumble, her thoughts a tangled mess of childhood memories and the warmth she always felt near him. "He saved me twice! That's all!"

The other girls gasped, a collective intake of breath that rustled through the room like wind through dry leaves.

"He saved you?!" Mina leaned forward, her eyes wide, the freckles on her nose almost disappearing. The thought of a heroic savior was something that some of the girls were deeply yearning for, especially after all the events that led them to join the cadet corps. "From what?"

"A falling beam...when we were little," Adelaide whispered, her gaze fixed on the frayed edge of the pillowcase. "And then... a large rock, during the fall." She didn't mention your arms around her, the way the world had narrowed to just the two of you for a heartbeat, and how the smell of you from being so close was one that she had grown to love over the years. Some things were hers to keep after all.

"I owe him a lot," She added as a statement, her fingers tracing the pattern of the pillowcase.

The girls let out a collective sigh. The story was even better than they had imagined. The hero, the damsel, the repeated rescues. "...So romantic..." Mina whispered, her hands clasped to her chest.

"Too romantic," Ymir's dry voice cut through their sighing like a knife. "Are you sure you are remembering it right? Maybe the beam was falling on his head, and he just happened to fall on you, like a sack of potatoes." She grinned at Adelaide, a predator's smile, all teeth and no warmth.

Adelaide's head snapped up, her green eyes flashing. "It wasn't like that! He was brave! He's always brave!"

Krista put a gentle hand on Adelaide's arm. "I'm sure he was, Adelaide. Ymir's just teasing."

Ymir rolled her eyes, but she didn't push it further. "Whatever..." She says, before looking at Krista, "But...If you ever need a 'real' hero...I will be there for you." She said with a totally confident smile aimed solely at Krista.

"Ymir!" Krista blushed, her smile a beam of light once more. But then she looked at Adelaide, her eyes softening a little. "But it must sure be nice to have someone like him looking after you." Her words were simple, but they hit Adelaide with the force of a horse.

Adelaide's breath caught. Her grip on the pillow tightened, and she hid her face in the fabric of it. For a second, she was back in the warehouse shed, the scent of cinnamon and the warmth of Conrad's body next to hers.

Mina, however, took Krista's words in a different direction. "That's so true! And he's so handsome, too! And so strong! Did you see him catch Armin? I thought they were both going to fall!" Mina's hands were clasped to her chest, her eyes shining with a newfound admiration.

"Conrad has a certain... presence," Mina's friend Hanna added, "...Strong, but gentle."

The other girls nodded, a wave of agreement washing through the room. Emelina, who had been listening from her bed with a book, turned a page. The rustle of the paper was almost loud enough to be picked up by the girls. Her lips turned up in a small, unreadable smile.

Krista then hugged Adelaide's arm, eyes moving to Mikasa, who seemed to be here only to defend Eren's name if they were to insult him. "But you knew him too, right, Mikasa?" She asked, with a sweet smile.

Mikasa's expression remains unchanged, but her eyebrows softened as she looked towards the window. "What Adelaide says is true... He is strong. He saved Eren's mother."

This confirmation from the most stoic and silent of the girls caused a new wave of gossip to pass through the group.

"Wow... So, he is a real hero," Mina breathed out.

Adelaide sat up straighter at this, a wave of pride swelling within her chest. But at the same time, a sense of unease began to creep in. She was not the only one. She had shared him with Eren and Mikasa for years, but now... Now there were so many more.

"Without him...Today, Eren..." Mikasa added, her gaze fixed on some distant point only she could see. She thought of what would have happened had Conrad not been there that day. A thought she quickly pushed away. "He's dependable."

Dependable. The word rested softly between them. It was a good word, and it showed more appreciation towards someone than she had shown to anyone other than Eren, and perhaps Armin. This one simple statement from Mikasa was a big deal.

"I-I will do it!" Mina raised a fist into the air, an unusual determination in her eyes. She said, eyes closed and a blush on her face.

"You will do what?" Emelina's voice cut through the room, her book now closed, but her finger still marking her page. She looked up, a hint of amusement playing on her lips. Her eyes, grey and sharp as steel, were scanning every little movement from her fellow cadet's face. Mina flinched. The whole room flinched. The silver-haired devil was paying attention.

"I-I...I will try my best...So that he..."

"He. What?" Emelina's smile widened, showing just a flash of teeth. Her silver hair caught the lantern light, turning it into a halo around her head.

Mina's face turned a deeper shade of red, her hands fumbling with her pillow. "N-nothing!"

Finally, Emelina relaxed her expression, with a soft sigh, "I am just messing with you," She said, with a waving gesture of her hand.

However, the other girls, other than Mikasa, who was used to it, seemed to finally take a collective breath that they had been holding. Even Ymir was a bit taken aback. But Krista...She just stared at Emelina, a small, curious smile on her face as she looked from her to Adelaide.

"You can all try it if you want," Emelina declared as she sat up on her bed, and with a grace only she could muster. Her hair slides like silk over her shoulders. "I don't mind, you know." She says as she crosses her legs.

Mikasa's eyes narrowed, her hand moving towards her scarf.

"But... just so we're clear," Emelina continued, her gaze sweeping across the circle, lingering for a second on each girl. "Conrad... he may be too much of a hero," She said, looking at Adelaide, "...But good food would be a good start." She added, with a sly smile, looking at Mina.

'All...try it?' Adelaide whispered in her mind.

"Then I will make the best soup he has ever tasted!" Mina declared, with a newfound determination.

"I... I... I will learn to make the best bread!" Hanna added, her face flushed with determination.

This seemed to only make Krista smile at the whole situation. She looked at Adelaide, whose face had gone pale, her grip on the pillow tightening.

"Don't worry, Adelaide," Krista said, her voice soft and comforting. "We are just having a little fun."

"Yeah, a little fun..." Adelaide thought, her mind racing.

Emelina seemed to be pleased with the chaos she had created. She went back to her book, the other girls now whispering amongst themselves, their conversation now focused on how to best cook for you...'Now for the next recipe.' She read in her mind. 'A good stew requires patience and understanding...' Emelina couldn't help but chuckle to herself. "...and a delicious target." She said, eyes focused on the book for the time being.

Meanwhile, the discussion about future plans became more lively. Sasha had managed to eat away all the snacks that the girls had managed to stash over the days. She was happy to just eat, and if the future made everyone a better cook, then all the better for her.

Ymir was plain bored with the conversation, but as she looked at Krista trying to comfort Adelaide, she felt a small pinch of jealousy. She then looked at Mikasa, who had not moved an inch, but the look in her eyes told a different story. Why would they care so much about one stupid boy?

***

Next Morning

Training Grounds

After several weeks of harsh training and with the dropouts already sorted out of the facilities, the true training could begin. The cadets were assembled near various totem poles, wooden structures, with several harnesses that were meant to test the stability of each cadet under the pressure and strain of using the real ODM gear. Chief Instructor Shadis paced back and forth. His boots crunched on the gravel.

"Listen up!" Shadis's voice boomed. "The 3D Maneuver Gear is the greatest weapon humanity has against the Titans. It's a marvel of engineering! But it's also a death trap! The slightest miscalculation, a moment of hesitation, and you'll be Titan meat! Today, we shall see if you have the aptitude to even risk those precious pieces of equipment on your worthless bodies! Do you understand me!"

"YES, CHIEF INSTRUCTOR!" The cadets shouted in unison.

"Good! Now, line up!" Shadis commanded. He then told a few of his assistants to make a demonstration of the equipment and the potential it offered to those who managed to master it. They managed to stay upright with little to no problem. Which drew the expected gasps and reactions from the cadets.

"Now it's your turn! Don't break my equipment!"

The training started. The cadets were strapped into the harnesses, their bodies suspended in the air. You watched as one by one, they attempted to keep their balance. Some managed to stay upright for half a minute before toppling over; others, like Mikasa, Annie, and Emelina, managed to stay upright. The normal ones struggled. Ymir was particularly cautious about Krista's safety, but when it was her turn, she managed to do it with a little smile, though her brow was furrowed in concentration. Still, everyone cheered her on.

Sasha was another one who seemed to have a natural affinity for the gear. Her body sat against the air as if nothing really had happened. Jean, Reiner, and Berthold also managed to pass their test without any issues, and you saw their confidence rise.

"Adelaide!" One of the assistants called out.

You stood in line waiting for your turn, arms crossed after a breakfast where, for some reason, you had been given four separate and special pieces of bread. Mina Carolina, Hanna Diament, Adelaide, and Krista had each handed you a piece after you ate, with the only excuse being that they were 'practicing' for their future as wives. A good excuse...Though it did remind you of the little lie you had told the boys. As for the taste? Adelaide was the best as usual, though, Krista was a close second...Though it was just half a piece of bread for some reason.

The stares from Jean, Reiner, Armin, Marco, and Connie were almost palpable. Even Eren had a surprised look on his face when he saw them handing you the bread.

You pushed the thoughts away and turned your attention back to the test.

Adelaide stepped up to the harness. Her hands shook a little as one of the assistants strapped her in. She took deep breaths, though, which allowed her to relax somewhat. Then, as you noticed her posture and technique, she saw your eyes on her. The shaking stopped. Her shoulders squared. Her expression hardened with a small, confident smile on her face. She looked at you, gave a nod, and focused on the task at hand.

The assistant pulled the lever, lifting her into the air. Her legs went up.

And then.

Nothing. She stayed. Her body swayed, but her balance was perfect. Her muscles tensed, but she maintained her posture. A few seconds passed. Then a minute. The cadets stared. Then they started to cheer.

"Way to go, Addie!" Krista shouted, her hands clasped together.

"Addie! Addie! Addie!" Mina and Hanna chanted, jumping up and down.

You watch her expression, and she seemed very surprised at her own success, but a happy one, and then she looked at you once more. The smile had changed. She gave a little more confidence than before. You noticed that her eyes were not shy this time, but proud. She seemed... happy.

But you also noticed Emelina's eyes accepting of this new development. She had a small smile on her face, but beyond that, there was nothing you could immediately read.

And that left only two more people. Eren and you. Eren was next, and with all the bravado in the world, he went ahead. "Alright! Let's do this! This is the first step to joining the Survey Corps!" He declared as he stepped into the harness. The assistants strapped him in.

"You talk too much, Jaeger," Shadis growled, standing next to Eren. "Let's see if you can back it up."

Eren didn't respond. He took a deep breath. He looked at you and gave a nod. You gave him a nod back. The assistant pulled the lever, lifting him into the air.

Then, his legs shot up. It was over. Eren flailed in the harness, at a complete loss on how he could properly maintain his balance. He crashed back down to the ground. The other cadets murmured in disappointment. Shadis sighed.

"Next!"

But Eren refused to give up. He got back up and went again. The same result happened. He was a mess. You saw the frustration in his face, the anger in his eyes. He refused to give up, not like this.

"One more," Shadis commanded.

You saw Eren bite his lip, drawing blood. He got back into the harness and tried a third time. This time, he almost did it, but then he lost his balance again and crashed to the ground, harder this time. Shadis had enough. "You're out, Jaeger. Enough flailing around." He told him.

Eren was speechless for a moment, unable to accept the reality that he had failed a test that other cadets had passed without any issues. "No...I have to...I have to do this..."

"There is no try, Jaeger. You either do it or you don't," Shadis said, not even turning to look at Eren. "Now, you are the last one, get your ass up there."

You walked to the harness. The assistants secured you. You looked at Eren, who was on the ground, getting helped by Armin and Mikasa to stand up. You saw Shadis's eyes on you, a tint of interest for the only recruit left who had not tried the gear. Then, you took a deep breath, just as you had done before any other test. Griffin's writing on how to distribute your body weight to maintain balance came to your mind. You closed your eyes for a split second and then opened them again.

You let your body go. For a split second, you felt the pull. Your legs rose into the air, but then...you found it. The equilibrium. You were hovering in the air, perfectly still. You looked at Shadis, who almost raised an eyebrow, which was quite a compliment in itself. Some of the boys weren't as likely to cheer you, given the events of the morning, but the girls were more than willing to do it.

The girls, especially Adelaide, shouted and clapped. You looked at them. Then you looked at your sister, who just smiled, as if she always knew you would succeed.

The only one who wasn't looking at you was Eren. He was looking at the ground, his fists clenched at his sides.

***

After the test, the rest of the day was spent on more mundane tasks, such as cleaning the grounds, the bathrooms, and the barracks. You stood next to Eren as you scrubbed the floor of the mess hall. The water was cold, your hands raw, and the floor was stubbornly dirty. You both scrubbed in silence, the only sound was the bristles of the brushes against the wooden floorboards.

Eren's movements were rough. Aggressive. He scrubbed the same spot over and over again, the wood groaning under the force.

"Eren." You said, your voice flat.

He didn't look up. "What?"

"Aside from the fact that if you keep scrubbing like that, Shadis will have you re-varnish the whole floor," You said, watching him. "What's wrong?"

He stopped scrubbing. He stared at the dark water pooling around the bristles of his brush. "I failed. I will never be able to avenge the people of Shiganshina like this... Not like this." Eren's knuckles were white on the handle of the brush. "You passed. Even Addie...she passed. My mother's leg is still broken, my father is gone... I'm not going to give up!" He slammed the brush against the floor, water splashing onto your trousers.

The determination in his eyes was the same fire as before; unlike others who needed that push, Eren found it within himself to keep going, even through failure. You saw it then. You saw what drove him, the absolute refusal to accept defeat as a final state. It reminded you of yourself, albeit from a different angle. He would find a way.

You smiled. He reminded you of the 'coward' who had written the journal but who had refused to live forever as a just that. The same drive for a greater purpose.

"You didn't fail," You told him, "You just haven't succeeded yet." You wiped the water from your trousers.

"Quite right!" Eren replied with a smile and a new determination in his eyes, "I'll just try again and again until I get it!"

"You do that," You said, "I will help you."

And you did.

For every free moment that you, Mikasa, Eren, and Armin had, you went over to the tethered gear. Again and again, Eren would try to maintain balance; again and again, he would fall. But he never gave up. You tried to find a way to explain it to him, but your body just did it; it was not something you could explain. So you did the only thing you could: you helped him. You took notes from the manual Griffin had described, you helped him adjust the belt straps, and you even held onto the back of the harness to try to give him a feel for the center of gravity.

Chapter 3312 - AOT 2