⚠︎ This chapter has instances of blood, violence and mentions of child abuse.
♬ Bones - Jared Benjamin ♬
"Is it funny when everything slips through your fingers? Right there it was all the answers you wanted, the resolve of your peril, yet it's gone. What else could it be? If not a joke, then a tragedy? If you do not laugh, will you cry? Will that bring back what was lost?"
To my beloved Nikias,
How are you faring today? It may have been only two days since we've seen each other, however I already miss your presence with my whole being.
My thoughts have been on the stories you've told me about your past, at the time I do not think I have reacted as one's partner should, I should've assured you more, held you more. That's the saddest part of being so far apart, although inside my mind I know we'll meet again soon and that in less than two years we'll marry. I cannot avoid but feel helpless in the face of only being able to talk with you through these letters.
Your life has been so hard on you, throwing you challenges that make you think you're constantly in danger by trusting others. I do hope you come to trust me with time and that the life we forge together brings you solace if you ever feel despair. I will forever be by your side, as a companion, as family and as a stable constant in your turbulent life.
Shall I tell you a story of my childhood as well?
When I was eleven I was running around near one of the beaches of the Kingdom, attempting to take a breather away from my lessons. Nowadays I cannot remember its name, at the time, I didn't use my powers in it so we still had days and nights. Of course no sun, moon or stars ever blessed our skies, though. While I was there, walking, running, playing alone, I sat down in the sand and prayed. Although shame washes over me due to such naive action, I still did it, I didn't pray to any specific god, I couldn't bear to. However I did pray, I prayed for a long life, to love and be loved, to find out what I must do in my future and to understand why, why was I being told to become King at such a young age.
Life for me wasn't tragic as it was for you, and my difficulties seem like childplay compared to the recollections you have of your life. However that memory sticks with me so strongly because after that I was officially announced as the future King and Saint of the nation, even if it was against my will.
They said I was the hope of the Kingdom, that my destiny was to save everyone from doom.
I thought 'they answered my questions, but this was not what I was truly wishing for', and for the first time I felt uncomfortable inside my own skin, as if I was stealing the life of someone else, someone more worthy.
It is embarrassing to admit that I do not wish to be a messiah not because of the trouble it could bring, but simply because I do not think I'm good enough to save everyone from pain. They expect something from me, and although I do wish to act accordingly I'm also scared to do so.
Who am I supposed to be? How should a real King act in this situation? Do they believe in me because of the gods or because I am me?
Nikias, I am glad for following my beliefs and for choosing to take this path with you even if that doesn't make me the King they wish for me to be.
Because for the first time since then, I felt peace next to you. Surprisingly I think your warmth and my coldness compliment each other perfectly and I am not scared of the future anymore, or of the pain I may cause my subjects.
Even if I still doubt myself, and even if I still bear the weight of a crown I did not choose to have.
You chose me out of many Kings, Princes or humans in general.
And for that, I will forever believe that the one to listen to my prayers that night was actually the universe, and you are the answer to them.
Thank you Nikias.
And any pain you carry, share it with me, as I wish to be your companion in not only happiness, but also sadness and pain.
With love,
Lyor.
♕
Dearest Lyor,
It is rather unfortunate that we must bear the distance that separates us for a while longer, although it was my choice and one I still believe to be right, I find myself more often than not, wishing to throw everything away and just move to the Kingdom to be with you.
My troubled past may be filled with sadness and pain, and I do wonder if most of what happened to me was somehow deserved due to my poor personality. Regardless of the feelings I had at the time or lack thereof, I do not wish for you to resent the way in which you treated me at that moment, as my heart felt full and I was glad you're the one to whom I share those stories to.
Your childhood was filled with many responsibilities one shouldn't bear at such a young age, especially not alone. The tragedy of the pain you suffered wasn't physical or apparent, the heavy burden laid on your back slowly as you grew up is what brings you such distress. Being a Saint, Messiah, King, none of that matters if the human underneath the Crown is barely handling its weight.
I wish to share that weight with you, as a sign of my willing partnership, of my care and affection for you. Lyor, we're in this together. Do not refuse my help, be it monetary or symbolic. We met seven months ago in the least ideal situation possible, and there is a lot I regret about our circumstances and how I handled the situation. Now that I'm much calmer and level-headed I regret the most for trying to blackmail you instead of simply attempting to schedule a proper meeting.
If the situation were to be contrary, I would've probably killed you on the spot. So I am thankful you decided on the reckless decision of indulging me.
However, in case this happens again, please avoid meeting blackmailers in private, much less accept absurd propositions as the one I've made to you.
Thank you for the indulgence and for keeping your sword at your ear, not your grip.
With care,
Nikias.
♕
To my beloved Nikias,
Please do not regret that night, as I don't. My choice of being reckless in the face of your letter, or threats didn't mean anything once I've heard your request that was neither absurd nor terrible in any form. My dearest, in the letters we've exchanged, in the moments we've talked and met, I've come to learn that the choice we've both made that night was the best one we'll ever make in our lives.
Deciding to marry you brings me immensurable happiness.
Learning about your worries, your life and past fills the dreadful days of my life as King with loveliness.
I simply adore you, and I know in the future I'll come to adore you even more.
Nikias, do not feel shame from your past choices or experiences, as even the wrong you do will serve as further knowledge to eventually do it right.
Speaking of the future that awaited us, you've mentioned to me before you left that soon you'll need to collect relics from the gods to aid the fight against the Ancient god of Time. May I inquire as to the reason why the relics or the Saints are so crucial for it?
Recently Cypress has been nagging me to partake more in state affairs and deal with more paperwork than the sword. However I cannot seem to understand the politics or need to manipulate my subjects in order to properly rule the nation. What do you suggest I do? I've only ever held my sword for my people, and the day I achieve the peace I wish for, will my knowledge of the sword become obsolete?
Your words of wisdom and your perspective that differs from my own are of great help as always, so do not worry, in my eyes you're more than helpful in easing my burden.
Although I must remain firm in my wish to not get financial aid from you, I do not wish for our relationship to be so… superficial.
I do understand and accept your suggestion of business, even the export of unrefined mana stones you've spoken to Keres about, things and situations so our Kingdom can grow with our own strength. Any more help than this, and my debt wouldn't be to you, but to your parents monetary power.
Even if you say it is a lie to convince others we should be allowed to marry.
All I want is for love and partnership, so even a dowry is out of the question, regardless of old costumes.
I am not King to submit to other's wishes to maintain such practices.
When you move in, all I want is you.
So please, let's cease this discussion at once.
With love,
Lyor.
♕
Dearest Lyor,
Last night I had a meeting with Irene and Miyuki on this very subject, the relics. The exact reason why the divine power is so important in our journey I cannot say as I do not know. However the only way to ''kill'' or even ''banish'' a god, is to use the most divine power possible against them, how to exactly use such relics and the power of the Saints is still abstract in my research. The more we manage to get, the best chance we'll have against the god of Time. Killing him would be ideal, although to kill a god, we would need power that far surpasses his own.
When Emperor Aelius and Empress Nyx banished Vremes, they used the artifacts the gods provided them alongside the help of other Saints whose name was lost in time, so our best bet would be recreating that ideal situation.
I have mentioned to you before that in my vision of the future, you managed to end Vremes on your own using the combined powers of the two gods. Although before that, the god was severely weakened by the usage of relics by others whom I do not know. To not leave anything to chance, I plan to gather the relics myself during the next six years, with the help of my knowledge of the future, I do know the location of some of them, and I am sure my ''brother'' would lend me some if I so require once he takes his place as Emperor.
Your assistance is most needed as the more relics we find, the less the enemy does.
As they also need relics to provide power like a ''battery'' to ''charge'' Vremes return, how exactly it is used I still haven't found out.
Another ''battery'' they seem to need is the blood of halflings. This fact is something I learned during the investigation Raphael and Jiwon conducted, apparently they are kidnapping halflings from across all three continents and using their blood for something.
I can only assume it is related to Vremes return.
Why, how and what exactly they're doing with it is still a mystery, however.
Basically, the more divine power we have, the easier the fight will be and the less our enemy has it also has the same effect.
That's why I have some plans in effect, the first one is stopping the flow of funds for their cult, the second is ending their workers supply and then the next step will be preventing them from finding the resources they need. The first step will be happening tomorrow night.
Raphael, Jiwon, Scarlet and two knights of my brother will be partaking in the operation, although I do feel restless not being there myself. This heavy contradiction inside my own brain is bothersome, I want to stay alive and safe more than anything, however my distrust makes me want to be there to make sure all will be more than alright.
What should I do? Can I even be able to let them do their own job without worries? Or should I follow them from behind? Just to make sure?
Enough about my worries, let's focus on yours.
Lyor, there's no shame in having areas in which you're not the best at, even as King, that's why you have allies next to you. Myself included, although I am quite good with documents and paperwork, my athletics abilities just resume having good stamina and being good at dodging and running. I still lose every single spar I have with any of my Knights and even hurt my waist a few days ago trying to shoot an arrow from the top of a tree.
We cannot be good at everything even when we desperately wish to.
That's why we must surround ourselves with those who compliment what we lack.
Cypress is only worried about your knowledge of what happens inside your own reign being superficial, I'm sure he only wishes for you to read more of the documents he processes and more often than not, provide the insight and path to your subjects. Making a mistake when the lives of others are on your lap can seem overwhelming, but rest assured, any mistake you make I'll help you make it right, and any doubt or challenge you come to face, I am merely a letter away.
So approach things calmly, start by reading and understanding more of the documents, the politics and social aspect will come slowly later on. Your Kingdom has been expanding at a rapid pace and you'll need a reform soon, but rushing through it will only cause more harm.
Only when you start to understand the insights of your Kingdom and the needs of your people, will you be able to create a system in which your ruling can work.
What are your future goals? What do you wish to happen to your nation once it becomes an Empire? What do you want to remain the same and what do you wish it changes? Even if you're unsure how, knowing your goals is a start, after all, we can all join hands and think about the how together.
You insist I am not alone in all this, but neither are you.
I have seen with my own eyes, your subjects love, revere and believe in you, that isn't possible with just blind faith so give yourself a bit more credit.
And I do understand what you mean Lyor, it is my deepest wish to also share everything with you, and if that is what you want, I will comply.
All I wish for is you, as well.
With love,
Nikias.
A pause, a deep breath followed by trembling hands dropping his pen. What did I just write? Four pages worth of a letter just to end it like this? It is no question that Lyor is a romantic, he says things that could easily be mistaken as prophecies of love. Rarely Nikias would reciprocate such words, yet he swiftly moved his pen to write such… words.
He's exaggerating, it's no 'I love you', he's far from saying he's 'in love', yet his chest pounds and his face flushes with the realization. Is this too forward? We kissed already and we are to marry, of course I harbor even a tiny bit of affection, he gaslits himself.
Yes, that is just a bit of affection, after all nor as Vahe or now as Nikias, has he ever felt something even close to romantic love.
Can he even tell once he does?
What is the line that needs to be crossed so that he can say what he feels is… love?
The worst part is, he has no one to whom he could ask such questions, first because to anyone but the two of them, Nikias and Lyor are already in love, and second because the only people that are truly in love with their partner around him are Alkaios and Evangelia.
Wait, I could ask Jiwon…
An idea he wouldn't follow more often than not, but the fact that his anxiety is through the roof nowadays and his sleep is lacking even more than usual, he could use the distraction, so he sends the letter off to Lyor and calls up the Knight to his office.
It's quiet today, Nikias observes as he awaits the other to arrive, Fleuri is out in a meeting with his brother's aide and Dacre is on his lunch break, so he's left alone in the silence of his office. Usually he would yearn for it, to be alone with his thoughts, with himself, no fear of letting something dangerous slip out, however perhaps he got used to the chaos surrounding his days, so much so that he almost misses it.
Almost, I am not crazy enough to summon Dacre back so soon… he thinks to himself as he organizes his desk. He spent all morning talking about his time on the streets and why did I listen to his full hour of explaining how to make a proper blowjob? I should shoot myself for thinking I miss his chaotic energy around me.
Questioning his own sanity, Nikias finally stops once his door opens and the Knight enters it.
''Good day, your highness'', Jiwon says with a bow, he seems more exhausted than usual, probably due to the preparations for the operation that will happen tomorrow at the black market. Raphael did mention he would prepare thoroughly, he's probably nervous about his first proper operation as a Captain. ''Did you summon me?''
Nikias nods, pushing his hair back, it was already growing enough to cover his eyes. ''Sit down'', he says, leaning back onto his chair and watching as Jiwon complies. Sainthood changed him a lot, he's way more docile and his eyes keep flickering between pink and black. ''How are you feeling nowadays on your new… condition?''
''Thanks to your highness I've been adapting well. Thank you for allowing me to not return to Morke for the time being'', Jiwon says, his tone is soft and he even bows his head while thanking the Prince. A complete change in personality.
I heard some Saints take parts of the personality of their gods, is this why he has become so meek now? Nikias wonders, watching the man with his glowing golden irises. Is my personality similar to the god of the Sun somehow as well?
''Anyway'', Nikias says with a sigh. ''Dacre told me you became some sort of love guru now'', his words make the other man blush.
''How much as he told you?''
''More than you'd like to know I know'', Nikias answers simply. ''I didn't summon you here to talk about Dacre or your turbulent relationship with him'', he continues, grabbing the pen on his desk to play with it, distracting his mind from the embarrassing question he's about to ask. ''As a Saint of the god of Love, you must know a lot about the subject itself''.
''Well, yes. Xinyi is a god of all kinds of love, not only romantic, and I can see the threads of love that connects us.'' Jiwon nods, he seems nervous, Nikias observes. ''Meaning I can tell who loves each other romantically, platonically, etc. Connections as family and friends are also ways of love. Of course not everyone loves their family or friends, that's why I cannot assume relationships solely by what I see''.
Nikias nods, as if the explanation made sense. ''Can you see mine?'' His question is more subtle than he intended, perhaps due to the shame of asking something so subjective.
Jiwon stares at him for a moment before answering. ''Yes, you have a few threads coming in, but just… three coming out''.
''What does it mean?''
''It means a lot of people love you, but you only reciprocate three of those''.
''Can you tell me which I reciprocate?'' Nikias holds his breath after asking such a question. Of course he can rationalize this, he can love Lyor as a friend, that doesn't need to be necessarily romantic. Back when he was Vahe, he read a lot, especially romance novels, so he isn't unfamiliar with the whole sweaty hands, pounding heart and fluttering stomach, however even if he feels all that, he cannot even fathom the idea of being in love himself. It would all be too sudden.
''One is a friendship thread, it's new, you didn't have that last month, I'm glad you consider Dacre your friend now'', Jiwon says, his tone is calm and his eyes are fully pink. Oh so he can tell which emotion is involved by looking at the connection? Panic fills his heart. ''Another one is familial love, which I'm surprised you don't feel towards your brother, a lot of people say you're obsessed with him'', his comment makes sense, after all the old Nikias did love Alkaios a lot. ''The connection is weak, so the person is probably dead or too far away''.
''Dead'', Nikias mumbles, sighing while closing his eyes, trying to not think about his memories of Zerah, they're still too painful.
''I see'', Jiwon nods. ''The last one is the heart'', he points towards Nikias' heart. ''I cannot tell the emotions, but it is your soulmate thread, everyone has one, but not everyone's is connected to someone else''.
''Why?''
''It only connects when you both have met each other, not everyone has that privilege, some are in different dimensions, others in different realities, and some just never got lucky enough. There are a billion people on this Earth after all, it's like finding a needle in a haystack'', Jiwon says as he gesticulates with his hand. ''Funny enough, most of the people that surround you have found theirs''.
''Like who?''
Jiwon counts on his fingers, ''Well, there's Lowe, your brother, of course, Dacre and me, oh, Miyuki recently got his, which was… weird to be honest. It feels like you're a magnet or a cupid, most of them would never have met their soulmates in this reality if you didn't interfere''.
''And to whom am I connected to?''
Nikias doesn't really care about connecting people to their destined ones, as long as they do their jobs he's glad they're happy on their own. Dacre probably should be more happy away from him, but other than that, everyone is free to have their love lives. What he really wants to know is, is it ok to let his emotions get the best of him right now? Even if Jiwon's answer isn't the one he's waiting for?
''Do you really need to ask? It's his majesty of course'', Jiwon tilts his head, confused. ''Why do you want to know? Don't you believe on his feelings for you?''
He shakes his head. ''That's not it, it's not his feelings I have doubts upon''.
''I suppose not everyone loves their soulmate forever, and having a soulmate is more a tell of compatibility than a set-on destiny. Everyone will feel drawn to their soulmates, but how their relationship develops is entirely up to their free-will. Destined to love someone doesn't mean you'll never love someone else'', Jiwon seems to speak way more when talking about such subjects. Dacre said he hated being a Saint, but it seems he's more interested in love than what he wishes to show. ''Your parents are a great example of that, your father met his soulmate and still chose your mother and now even loves her as well''.
That's the first time I heard something like that. I knew the Emperor and Empress had a marriage of convenience turn love, but I never thought he turned down his soulmate for her.
''So you're saying Lyor could change his mind about his feelings even if we're destined to love each other?''
Nikias rubs his eyes, his head hurting.
''That's…'' Jiwon opens his eyes in surprise, shocked, he fumbles upon his words but is unable to speak to fix his errors as the door opens.
''Nikki! I was having lunch near the garden and you won't believe…'' Dacre enters like a hurricane, excited, he doesn't notice Jiwon. ''Your brother's aide? He's gay!'' He says the news as if Nikias cares. ''Do you think he likes your brother? That would be so interesting! Should I talk with him? Oh, he was talking with Fleuri so I might interrupt them… Maybe he is interested in Fleuri? That would be a waste, poor him, Fleuri is the worst person ever to like''. He doesn't stop talking until he finally sees Jiwon. ''Jiwon? What ya doing here?'' His face becomes just as pink as the ends of his hair and he even hiccups at the end of the sentence, clearly being caught by surprise.
''I was summoned by his highness'', Jiwon answers, his pink eyes even more fervent as he stares at Dacre, looking at them like that, Nikias can clearly see who likes who more.
''Oh, I see…'', Dacre turns to look at Nikias, embarrassed by being caught gossiping about his colleagues, something he does with the Prince when they're alone. Well, to be fair is all him talking and the Prince simply listening and not commenting on it whatsoever.
Well, it has his purposes as this way I can know if something in their lives is interfering with work, I do wish he would tone down the details, though.
''Lord Xylon has an infatuation with someone, I haven't seen who, though'', Jiwon says, getting up from his chair, feeling that his time there is coming to an end. ''And Fleuri had no threads of love, so I wouldn't expect any gossip from him'', his words are cold but his tone is endearing, he ruffles Dacre's hair, his eyes filled with affection. ''Be more careful when talking about other people's lives, especially since Lord Xylon is a noble and you're a commoner''.
Dacre nods, seemingly annoyed and embarrassed.
''I'll take my leave, your highness'', Jiwon says with a bow, Nikias nods and the man leaves quickly.
''Shit, he's always lecturing me'', Dacre mumbles. ''I was just excited because I keep finding more people like us, you know, it wasn't harmful gossip''.
''I know'', Nikias says simply, his mind away from his previous worries.
''If that blue haired man likes your brother, do you think he'll be sad?'' Dacre asks, sitting on the chair Jiwon was previously on. ''I mean, I wish I could help everyone like us to achieve a good love life'', Dacre nods to himself. ''Since I think we deserve it as well, but liking the Crown Prince is a bit… tricky to help''.
''Just tricky?''
''Of course, we can always work things around'', Dacre's comment makes Nikias laugh. ''Don't laugh! Love rules, and everyone can fall in love with the right pushing''.
''I do not think so, but do as you please'', Nikias says. ''How even did you find out he's gay?''
''I overheard him talking with the Crown Prince as I was leaving the kitchen, and then I followed him until he met Fleuri'', Dacre shrugs.
''That's staking''.
''I wasn't following him because I was interested in him so it's fine, plus isn't the fact that no one noticed a good thing for my training?'' Dacre asks, shamefully.
''I don't think that's something to be proud of'', Nikias laughs again, grabbing his documents so he can start working again.
''Have you eaten?''
''Not hungry''.
Dacre stays silent, watching Nikias for a few minutes, before speaking again. ''I don't know what you're worried about, but if you want, I'm here to help you, even if it includes murder''.
Nikias pauses. ''I'm worried about the operation tomorrow''.
''Wanna follow 'em then?''
He looks up at the boy, his hair is more platinum than pink now, can he even think of him as a pink-haired boy? Is he letting the color fade as a way to seem more professional now?
''I don't want to be in danger''.
''I know someone that can get us an invisibility spell and I would be with you the whole time'', Dacre knows how to convince Nikias, but did he even need convincing after all?
''Is that person trustworthy?''
''No, but their spells are''.
Nikias sighs. ''Thank you''.
♕
To Sir Cypress,
As I previously mentioned at our meeting, alongside this letter are all the information his highness, Prince Nikias, has gathered on the slave-trade of halflings from the Likidm Continent to the Vapidm Continent and the Kingdoms involved.
We believe that the information we're providing will further confirm the one you already have, even so, hopefully, this will aid the King in his next conquests.
The Prince also expressed his concern about the slaves rescued from any operations we may conduct here in the future. Per common knowledge the Exos Empire doesn't provide rights to halflings and even allows them to be sold as properties, therefore, the Prince enquired about sending the halflings to your Kingdom as refugees.
I await your contact on the possibility of making this a plan alongside the promised information on the mana stone mines your Kingdom possesses.
Kind regards,
Fleuri,
Second Prince Nikias' aide.
♕
Good evening Fleuri,
I appreciate the information provided and we're already investigating its veracity on our side.
The growth of the Kingdom in territory does provide us with space to accommodate the refugees from the Exos Empire, however, we're not able to provide them housing and food, as we're in a delicate financial situation at the moment.
It would be excellent if you'd reach out before sending off the halflings, as we would need time to prepare to register them in the Kingdom. At the moment I am busy with the paperwork of the citizens from the other Kingdoms that flowed into ours, so I am unsure if we would be able to do so for at least three months.
However if someone were sent alongside to assist, it would be ideal.
Keres already established a plan of exportation, please read carefully the documents attached to this letter.
Let's schedule a new meeting at the same time next month.
Kind regards,
Cypress,
King Lyor's aide.
♕
To Sir Cypress,
If we're correct it might be as soon as tomorrow, however that is only if they don't move the halflings before we manage to finish the operation. Could you be on standby just in case?
I understand it is inconvenient, however it is an order from the Prince.
My apologies in advance and I'll attempt to inform you as soon as possible of the outcome.
The meeting is scheduled then, it is a pleasure working with you
Kind regards,
Fleuri,
Second Prince Nikias' aide.
♕
Good morning Fleuri,
Avoiding my wishes to curse, I'll be on standby as my King ordered.
I also established a small chart of the products we are able to export per request of the Prince the last time he came by.
Any exportation plans must be talked with Keres or me.
Preferably Keres as I do not believe I'll be able to reply to your letters in a consistent manner.
Kind regards,
Cypress,
King Lyor's aide.
♕
To Sir Cypress,
Is it possible for our next meeting to be at the Prince's office here at the Empire? Due to the proximity with the Founding Festival, I will not be able to leave the Empire unless I'm accompanying the Second Prince.
I await your reply.
Kind regards,
Fleuri,
Second Prince Nikias' aide.
❥
The preparations for the joint operation between the Golden Phoenices and the Silver Crows were made up to perfection, the amount of Knights on standby, the tracking bracelets being used by them in order to call for reinforcements if needed, and not only their weapons and armors, there were also magic circles engraved in parts of their skins in order to protect them and also be used in times of dire need.
Nothing could go wrong, the high spirits of those involved can't even be erased by the cloud of anxiety hovering over Prince Nikias' head. Even Evangelia, who previously was the most apprehensive herself, is positive about the operation.
''Remember, the objective is collecting enough evidence so that we can shut everything down and kill those damned nobles for treason!'' Evangelia says as she pushes her hair back as she finishes drawing a magic circle on the back of Sir Rainier's hand. ''Nothing must be made at the expense of your lives, however the whole nation depends on this working out.''
She's exaggerating a bit, but it is true, if the smuggling continues, the Empire will suffer a financial blow and that will bring forth a time of famine that will draw so many towards religion, those who benefited the most were those in the Time Cult, whom gathered the most followers after such difficult times, Nikias thinks as he plays with the cuticles of his nails, a bit of blood even being drawn from it, not that he notices it. They recovered fast due to Alkaios being a good politician, but the real impact would only be seen later when Vremes emerged. It's ok if this fails, I have other plans, but I really want it to work. Cutting off their financial source will deal the blow I need to bring them out and perhaps even cut off the cult before they progress too much.
Will it work though?
Am I able to stop everything from happening with just this?
Times like this make him miss his older brother the most, Zerah would probably smile, ruffle his hair and say that everything would be just fine, that at the end of the day if something doesn't work out, he would be there to help him.
But he isn't there and he'll never be.
After all, he's dead.
Nikias is anxious, for several reasons, up until now he had his doubts but he was confident, choosing his Knights, developing his abilities, learning more about the Empire and his own mana, creating artifacts and seeking for those who will share his future, everything was going well, according to his plans, after all, he was the one executing and planning those controlled situations. But he's far from having the necessary power to protect himself against the dangers of the future, he's still inside the first book timeline and he's starting to see the situations he cannot control.
And that's the source of his anxiety.
The situations he cannot control, the people he cannot tell what to do, the unpredictable future he forged himself.
Trusting those he chose and bound with oaths and contracts is proving to be harder than he anticipated. Even if the betrayal could cost their lives, could they still do it? What could entice them?
Even if he now can properly use a bow and arrow, and even if he has the protection of the fairy within him, he isn't fully safe against the enemy. He doesn't have any experience and he can barely use his mana properly.
In terms of strength, Nikias loses to all of his Knights, or at least that's how he sees himself. What's the point of having an immensurable amount of mana if I cannot use it? He questions himself as he sighs, watching the Knights chatting.
After the fight between Dacre and a few other Silver Crows' Knights, their relationship became more amiable, Lord Rainier probably scolded them, Nikias notices, he's a good leader, it's a waste for him to die.
Although Nikias does think that, he won't move a muscle to change such an outcome, perhaps if Lowe begged him he could help him out, but that's only because a happy employee makes a happy employer.
''A flower for your thoughts?'' Dacre appears behind Nikias, offering the man a small rose bud, which he immediately gives to Petal that is resting on the Prince's shoulder. As the fairy happily devours the bud, the Prince sighs. ''Don't worry so much, they're quite loyal to you, surprisingly''.
''That can always change'', Nikias says, his tone is deep and serious, his eyes are dark.
Dacre observes the Prince's expression for a moment before speaking again. ''A contract, a mana pact or even money are things that can bind someone, but those things do not prevent them from exercising their free will, it just punishes them for it.'' He says, stretching, just then Nikias notices the man is wearing the armor uniform as well. ''Their loyalty for you comes from the fact that you gave them a way out of despair''.
''Speaking for yourself?''
''Nah, sure, that's part of it, but you being my first friend ever plays a bigger part. A dog cannot be controlled only by a leash''.
''You enjoy calling yourself a dog, huh?''
''Well, they said I'm your rabid dog, I just enjoyed the compliment'', Dacre answers with a short laugh. ''My point being, just trust us a bit more, betrayal is inevitable when you're in such a high position, but when that happens you won't be alone in the end, I'm certain at least me and the King will stay by your side until the end''.
''Being so serious doesn't match your personality'', Nikias whispers, a bit touched, but he hides behind his blank eyes.
The boy laughs again. ''Tomorrow is my birthday, will you have a drink with me to celebrate it?''
''Wouldn't you rather have fun with your boyfriend?'' Nikias asks.
''Nah, I enjoy your company the most, Nikki'', Dacre says, wrapping his arm around Nikias' shoulders. ''After all, friendship is the most pure and lasting bond there is''.
This time, Nikias can't hold in, he starts laughing. ''Who said I consider you my friend?''
''You don't need to say it, I can feel it'', Dacre shrugs with a smile.
The interaction eases a bit of Nikias' anxiety, distracting him of the preparations happening a few meters from him, but that's only momentarily. As soon as everyone finishes their preparations, Nikias' blank expression is back and his heart is clenching just as much as it was before. I have a bad feeling, but why? Everything couldn't be planned better…
''Listen up'', Rainier gets up, the shining armor of the Silver Crows only makes his eyes and hair stand out more, he looks like a war soldier ready to annihilate the enemy. ''If everyone does their job properly we will be back for a drink and a feast. So make sure we can go home to our loved ones early!'' His words are projected to everyone, his tone is clean and clear. ''Well, if anyone fucks things up, make sure you're dead before I can get my hands on you, of course'', his words carry weight as his subordinates shake with the pressure. ''I made dinner plans with my beloved, you see''. His words almost make Nikias laugh, for someone who before would die for the woman of his best friend to now be talking about going home for someone else is comical.
Can someone's heart truly change this quickly?
''Wow, I was wrong, I thought Lowe was just plain and ordinary, but I guess he must be quite the catch'', Dacre mumbles, his arm still around Nikias. ''To catch the heart of someone that already loved another''.
Nikias only nods watching as Rainier delivers the orders, although this was more a test of leadership for Raphael, he can recognize it's hard to shine when your opponent in the spotlight is someone with years of experience.
The youngest twin, however, doesn't seem to be discouraged as he speaks with Scarlet and Jiwon, instructing them calmly before turning and exchanging other words with Rainier, his clear brown eyes are darker, and he's the only one not wearing armor. ''It disrupts the flow of my mana'', that was what Raphael told Nikias when he received the uniforms. ''I need to move swiftly to be able to curse others, and a heavy armor would get too much attention, and the material would oxidate due to the nature of my mana''. He complemented, Nikias just hoping the lack of protection doesn't get him hurt.
''We should move'', Dacre comments, stepping away from the Prince and grabbing his crossbow he left under the tree near them.
''You should go to bed'', Nikias speaks to Petal, grabbing her from his shoulder, the fairy stares at him for a moment before shaking her head. ''It's dangerous'', the fairy nods. Nikias sighs. ''Just stay hidden'', he gives up, placing the fairy inside the pocket of his jacket.
''Are you sure you won't bring your bow? Or at least use an armor?'' Dacre asks as they watch the Knights moving to their positions.
''I don't intend to fight, so being able to move is better, and aren't you going to protect me?'' Nikias asks with a soft smile, trying to break his own tension. Dacre nods, pushing his platinum blonde hair back and taking a deep breath, as if he's preparing himself. ''Let's go''.
''Make sure he comes back in one piece, or you might be killed for it'', a voice stops him. Evangelia looks tired, her eyes are shrouded in darkness, and her hands are dirty with mana paint she used to draw the magic circles on Rainier. ''And your highness, if you're going to mess up with the natural order of things, you should trust your own choices more''.
Nikias doesn't answer, he doesn't want to, because she's right. What's the point of giving orders and developing talents if he's never going to fully trust them with it? Perhaps one day he'll be able to do so. But that day isn't today.
''Let's just go, Nikki'', Dacre grabs Nikias' hand, pulling him away from the Crown Princess, being rude to her in the process, not that he cares if he offends the woman.
❥
When everything goes too well, then that's a problem in itself. Of course, it could just mean that everyone involved is just capable and that they were able to develop the perfect plan, but there isn't such a thing. Perfection doesn't exist and the eerie atmosphere of these abandoned complexes of mines doesn't belong to a place that was simply abandoned.
''There's just barren lands and collapsed mines here'', Scarlet is the one to comment, she whispers as she holds her breath, not because she was ordered to, but because that place is quiet, too quiet.
''Keep your eyes sharp'', Raphael says, but he isn't much better, the dark and damp atmosphere brings him bad memories from his childhood, however he attempts to remain clear headed.
From afar, observing the situation, Dacre and Nikias are feeling just as anxious.
''This place is weird'', Dacre comments, standing next to the Prince with his crossbow armed and ready to shoot at any given moment, his green eyes are sharp and attentive, but the wavering anxiety behind them shows his thoughts. He shouldn't have brought the Prince there.
Nikias doesn't say a word, all the information they had was correct, the route of the smuggling was there, the tools, the proofs, everything was there, but there was not a single soul to be found. Why? What could they possibly have missed? Did someone betray them? Or somehow the information that they were going there leaked somehow?
There's no way they could've retracted their operation so fast if they didn't know about the raid beforehand.
''Nikki, stay close'', Dacre whispers, as they walk while hiding from the Knights.
A noise catches the attention of everyone there, the first to react is Rainier, his sword almost perfectly timed on the throat of the person attempting to run away. The blade shines in the dark land, the person is a small child, their appearance is one of malnutrition at first, but at second glance, the child is just like Miyuki, the sunk dimples and pale skin. The child is frightened but Rainier doesn't retract his blade nor any of the other Knights ask him to.
''Who are you?'' Raphael is the one to ask, he even bends to look directly into the child's eyes, while Rainier's blade still lays coldly on their skin.
The child doesn't speak, they simply point towards one of the caves before leaning forwards towards the blade, attempting to cut their throat with the sword, but Rainier's reflexes are quicker than the child's actions.
''Don't even think about it'', he says. ''Jiwon, you should stay here with Scarlet and keep an eye on this child, Raphael and I will check the cave'', Rainier continues, holding his sword's handle tightly, he can feel that something isn't right with that whole situation.
''I don't think it's a good idea to split up'', Scarlet says, also unsheathing her sword. ''This place is giving me the creeps''.
''We should just follow orders'', Jiwon mumbles, probably knowing that was the best course of action.
''It's a terrible idea'', Nikias mumbles.
''Who should we follow?'' Dacre asks, conflicted.
''Let's stay here, it's definitely a trap, and if we cannot escape in time we would be in danger'', Nikias says, sitting down near a tree, away from the other's scope of vision, yet where he's still able to see them. ''I don't get it, what went wrong?''
''Nothing, they're just weird people overall'', Dacre says, keeping his aim sharp. He glances at Jiwon who is talking with Scarlet as he holds the child from escaping. ''Why send a child off to get them into a trap?''
''Did we lack any type of information?'' Nikias asks himself, still not believing the situation they're finding themselves in.
Minutes pass by and the two Knights still don't leave the cave.
''I think we should go in as well'', Scarlet says, looking around anxiously. ''I smell blood''.
''From where?'' Jiwon asks as the woman's eyes become blood red.
''Where do you think, genius boy?'' She says sarcastically, her feet moving frantically.
''Can you tell whose?''
''Of course, I have a DNA machine in my nose alongside my blood-smells storage'', she answers, rolling her eyes.
''Fuck Scarlet, how the hell would I know how your skills work?'' Jiwon is starting to get nervous as well, the child on his arms starts to tremble with the pressure between the two Saints fighting. ''We cannot fail this mission! Do you even understand what we have at stake here?''
''The future of the Empire?'' She asks in a mocking tone.
''The trust of the Second Prince!'' He answers in a firm tone, surprising everyone that hears it.
Nikias flinches. He looks at the two Knights who are staring at each other with anger clear in their eyes.
Scarlet sighs. ''You're right''.
''I don't understand'', Nikias says, even more confused.
''You think we cannot feel your anxiety? If the leader of a herd is scared, then the herd will be as well'', Dacre says, not focusing on anything in specific, his eyes glued on the entrance of the cave. ''If we lose you or you lose your goal, then we all collapse alongside it.''
''I'm not that important!''
''Of course you are!'' Dacre wants to yell, he wants to look directly into Nikias eyes, shake him up and tell him to get a grip. Where did their composed boss go? The person that was threatening them just a few days ago? With just an ounce of his mana making everyone tremble as if their lungs were going to collapse? ''Nikki, no, your highness, you have power, you're not only the second son of the second most powerful Empire in the world, but you're also the Saint of the most powerful god in any registry. You spent months planning this operation, you put us in positions of trust and power, yet you do not fully trust us, you can move our lives with a flick of your finger!'' Decre continues. ''Of course they care about getting your trust, our positions are unstable, we live to satisfy your wishes, to walk alongside you towards your goal which we do not even fully understand. How could you not matter?''
''I never asked for this power''.
''Yet you have it, and you use it marvelously, may I add'', Dacre sighs, lowering his crossbow and finally looking at Nikias.
For the first time since he met the Prince, the man finally looks like he lost it, his eyes are unfocused, the glimmer of gold in them is nowhere to be found, and under the darkness his hair doesn't shine like silver, he looks like anyone else. Like a scared boy that doesn't know what to do with everything that he built himself.
''Why didn't you just remain a useless Prince? Why did you choose to change?'' Dacre's tone is soft as he stares directly at his friend.
''Because I want to survive'', Nikias answered. ''Me, myself, alone, I don't care about other's survival, so why is it on my back?''
''Because you're a Prince, you were born with people's lives in your hands'', Dacre's voice is hoarse and cold. ''Although you act like a child from the slums like me, you could end this with just a move of your hands. Nikias, you have the power to kill all those nobles by simply asking your father for it. Why don't you? Why did you choose to recruit us instead? Wasn't it to do this? To be here, to do this for you.''
''Nothing is that simple Dacre, there's so many layers of power you do not understand, father knows the rottenness of the Empire, the intricacy of politics when one is Emperor is complicated…''
''Exactly, I do not know. You do. That's why we want your trust, because you know what we don't, you move with selfishness but the results are selfless''. Dacre takes a deep breath. ''Nikias, we believe in your path, in the choices you made, in the knowledge you have, because up until now, trusting you was the right thing. So trust us in return and let us show you that you were right''.
Nikias blinks slowly, he still doesn't understand, neither Dacre's words nor his subordinates' intentions. Do they pity him? Do they want his power? Is it money? Fame? Why is it that they want his trust? What did he ever do to warrant such things?
''Do you know when a child from the slums could become a Knight? Or when a woman abandoned by her family and with a dead traitor husband would be able to work for an Imperial Prince? Nikias, you give people hope yet refuse to understand the consequences of it.'' Dacre turns around, his gaze back at the entrance of the cave, more time passed and still no trace of anyone. ''You say your goal is to use us, then do so, stop questioning trust or loyalty, just use us as toys and give us the rewards you see fit. I, for once, am pleased to be your dog, so do not wonder about the loyalty of your hunting dog and just release its leash to do as you order''.
''A dog can always bite its owner'', Nikias whispers.
''A dog bite on a human can be healed with the right spells, so not even a scar would remain, yet the dog would be neutralized, so tell me, who in the end suffers more from said bite?''
Silence ensues, and such remains for a couple minutes, Nikias can't speak, he doesn't know how to or what to say. Somehow he feels he hurt Dacre's feelings, but he isn't the best at fixing mistakes that aren't clearly visible. He could apologize, but for what? He only spoke the truth of his heart.
''Where the hell is Dame Tove?'' Scarlet says, biting her nails anxiously. ''She said she would be right behind us, was she caught by someone?''
''I'm surprised by such care'', just as soon as she's called, the woman appears, she's wearing tattered clothes instead of her usual uniform, and her hair is hidden under a cap, her appearance of a boy from the slums. ''I was there'', she pointed at the top of a nearby tree. ''Watching everything, and beforehand I was at a nearby slum asking around, it seems that they moved out in a hurry, but it wasn't because of our raid, but because they received an order from a big shot saying they needed to change operations''.
''What could've made them do that?'' Jiwon asks.
''Probably the halflings? The locals were already noticing the big movement of dirtbloods, so that's probably it''.
''Don't call them that'', Jiwon shoots, his hands on the child's ears. ''So it was just an unfortunate coincidence?''
''But then why would this child point us towards that cave? And the smell of blood?'' Scarlet points out. ''It couldn't be all for nothing! We can't go back empty handed, the Prince will eat our livers!''
I won't, the Prince in question thinks as he hears their conversation, Dacre muffles a laugh, the tension between them fading slowly.
''Calm down, my lady, they haven't finished cleaning this facility yet, so we'll probably find something'', Tove says with a shrug. ''Why are you so desperate to please the Prince either way?''
''Because this is my first mission, I need to prove myself as a worthy choice of a Knight'', Scarlet answers honestly.
You acted as if it was whatever… But you really want this, huh? Nikias thinks with a sigh, closing his eyes and trying to stabilize his breathing.
''It's not as if the Prince has that many options, so I would say you're safe'', Tove says with a chuckle.
''He won't be just a Prince for long'', Jiwon says. ''So you shouldn't belittle him so quickly''.
''I feel bad for your nation, to have such a useless person taking the throne'', Tove says, shrugging. Scarlet grabs the woman by her shirt, making the cap she's wearing fall off revealing her hair.
''Say that again, you bitch, do you think only the Crown Prince has rabid dogs for Knights?'' Scarlet says, clenching her teeth with anger.
Tove can feel her blood boiling in response to the woman's anger, not aware that it was the woman's mana acting inside her body. ''Calm down, everyone has their kinks, are you moving from the Crown Prince to the Useless one? Well, go off I guess'', Tove laughs again, coughing blood, her chest hurts, but she can't pinpoint why.
''Ha. No wonder you're the only friend of that hypocrite, you're just as rotten'', Scarlet mumbles, letting go of the woman, making her fall onto the ground, coughing blood. ''You should go to the doctor once we get back, I think a few of your lung veins popped'', she says with a smirk. ''Oh, and I'll make sure to add your little remark to the report the Crown Prince will be reading.''
Before Tove can answer, the two men return from the cave. On their arm there are piles of documents inside a tattered bag, as well as another bag filled to the brim with refined mana stones. Both Raphael and Rainier are covered in a thick black substance.
''Good and bad news'', Raphael says, ''We found a good amount of evidence against everyone involved in the mana stone smuggling, so we can use that.'' He drops the bag he was holding. ''There isn't a single soul inside that cave, so we'll need to further interrogate the child, which I'm not sure the Prince will be satisfied with'', he sighs, trying to clean himself from the black substance. ''Oh, and I just killed my first monster ever and it was absolutely disgusting'', he laughs, his eyes are dull and his expression doesn't change. Raphael sighs again. ''That place is filled with refined mana stones, they left in a hurry, and there are a lot of monsters as well, it smells putrid''.
''We killed most of them, but we couldn't retrieve everything that was there'', Rainier says, he seems calmer, he probably has a lot of experience killing monsters from his missions as the Crown Prince's escort and Captain. He raises his wrist. ''Listen up, come here with carriages ready to move at least six tons of mana stones, also called the Imperial Knights for a perimetral isolation and forest research'', he speaks towards the ones that stayed behind through the communication device, before turning to the ones there. ''I know this was a bit disappointing and that we all had something to prove with this operation, but don't feel discouraged,'' his gaze goes to Raphael. ''This is just your first one, there will be more chances to prove yourselves to the lord you serve, for now, let's retire home and take a good shower''.
''He's a good leader, no wonder Raffe seems discouraged'', Dacre comments, sitting next to Nikias, now that everything is over. ''This feels like a huge waste of time''.
''I guess'', Nikias says, ''I need a shower as well, let's go back and pop open a good wine'', he gets up, looking at his watch. ''Happy birthday Dacre, let's continue being good friends from now on'', he speaks fast, words he'll never say again.
Dacre laughs. ''Sure, Nikki, let's get wasted tonight please'', he wraps his arm around Nikias as they leave the forest, without waiting for the others to leave first.
❥
The day after the failed operation was calm and uneventful, at least at first. Dacre and Nikias stayed up until the sunrise drinking wine, whiskey and other mixture of alcoholic drinks they were too drunk to remember of, they talked of so many things such as their sexualities, their colleagues, family and even the past, although Nikias wasn't drunk enough to spill about his real past, he did spoke of the occasional bad memories from the original Nikias he had.
Later on, after the two boys slept together on the Prince's bed until lunchtime, they had a special lunch with all the Knights for Dacre's birthday, where they drank even more. Although they weren't drunk, the two boys were clearly intoxicated, making rumors emerge across the Palace.
''The Second Prince is cheating on the King.''
''The Second Prince is back with his alcoholism.''
''He didn't change after all, he's just walking around stinking of alcohol as if he has no care in the world.''
''Of course the Second Prince isn't getting better, he's just getting worse now that he came of age.''
''What an embarrassment for the Imperial family.''
Such rumors didn't truly bother the Prince, a day of debauchery is much needed to quell his anxiety, he gave up changing the minds of those who already judge him based on a muddy past that doesn't truly belong to him. If he continued to care, he would go insane.
The rumors, actually, mattered most for the family of the Second Prince, his brother angry at those whispering behind his back, his mother worried about his mental health - although she doesn't move a finger to help the boy - and his father worried about his future as King Consort if he continues to harbor irresponsible habits.
Habits? He rarely drinks more than a glass of wine twice a week, usually as he speaks with Lowe, Raphael or Dacre, never alone. Getting drunk? Perhaps when he's in uncomfortable social situations, but never this much, however this time the combination of the failed operation, the building anxiety and the recent nightmares of Zerah's death that seem more vivid than ever as more anxious he gets, it all made him feel tired enough to want to forget his pains for at least a few hours.
And Dacre simply gave him the company and the excuse.
In the afternoon, another meeting took place, beforehand Nikias took a cold shower and put on more formal clothes, his previous anxious and tired expression is now hidden behind his blank eyes as he receives the report he already knew about due to him following the five Knights the night before.
''Ultimately, I do not think the operation was a complete failure, although we didn't manage to make any arrest, we did manage to gather quite a significant amount of evidence'', Rainier states.
It wasn't a complete failure? If they already abandoned this operation this didn't achieve shit, arresting them wasn't the point, the point was to cut off their financial source.
Nikias doesn't say a word, he holds his mana, trying not to leak it by accident, he isn't trying to intimidate others or even show his anxiety.
''With the documents retrieved we'll be able to formalize arrests, so in the end we did achieve our goal, and the operation was shut down'', Evangelia says, but the wrinkles between her eyebrows show she's just as worried as Nikias about not being able to cut off the money source of the cult following the Ancient god Vremes.
''We weren't able to read all the documents, however the most frequent name in them is Erik Sawdon, the current Duke of the West.'' Tove says as she flips the pages of the report she made, reading the information. ''And the fact that monsters were found inside the caves is a problem in itself, the involvement of the Hai Empire probably has something to do with it, which is a concerning situation''.
''There's also the issue with the halfling child found in the premises'', Raphael says, worried.
One of the Silver Crows' Knights scoffs. ''Its just a halfling spawn, just torture them for information and sell them off to some kinky noble'', his statement makes Fleuri flinch next to Nikias and Miyuki's face turn more pale than already is.
But the one who gets truly angry is Raphael. ''Regardless of blood, a child is a child, they're not even past the age of eight, how can you ask for their torture?''
''Are you feeling some sort of kinship due to both of you having dirty blood? Don't worry, even if you're scum you're still a human being'', the Knight doesn't back down.
''Shut up, Sir Alwin.'' Rainier states, rubbing between his eyes with frustration.
''Halflings are still half human'', Irene is the one who speaks as she clicks her pen, clearly angry on behalf of her colleague.
''The child should be interrogated then sent to an orphanage'', Evangelia says.
''No orphanage in the Empire would accept a halfling'', the one to speak is Sir Phillip, Evangelia's personal Knight from the Silver Crows.
''We can send the child to the Morke Kingdom, our alliance due to the Second Prince's marriage also extends to the refugee of halflings'', Fleuri states, trying not to showcase his emotions due to the conversation topic.
''Ha.'', the Knight that was previously bashing the halflings laughs. ''Refugees? Are you claiming the Empire is a bad nation for halflings? Considering they're not hunted like in the Hai Empire, I would say they should lick the floor the Emperor walks in''.
By the corner of his eyes, Nikias can see Fleuri's flushed face as he grows angrier, and Miyuki isn't much better, although he seems sick instead of angry, Irene and Dacre also seem a step away from bouncing on the man. However the one who speaks is Raphael, his tone is controlled, but Nikias can notice the black taking over the tip of his fingers as his mana slips out.
''Even if the Empire doesn't give the same rights as regular humans to halflings, it's not up to us to judge how they should live. The Morke Kingdom is a place where halflings can live freely, we can leave up to the child to choose, regardless of our personal opinions or goals, a child should be protected at any cost, be it full human or only half.''
The Knight seems keen to continue the discussion, but Prince Nikias finally interrupts them.
''We'll go with Raphael's suggestion'', Nikias speaks softly, his eyes never going to the insolent Knight. ''Although the operation wasn't a complete failure in your point of view, the fact that they were able to escape being caught in the act is already the worst case scenario.'' His tone is cold, but his voice prickles softly on everyone's ear. ''The connection with the Hai Empire will amount to nothing, even if they're experimenting with monsters or creating them somehow in our territory, the Exos Empire will never win a war against them, be it political or any other kind''.
''It's a partial win, but it's still a win'', Evangelia states, clearly also conflicted.
''No, it's not even partial'', Nikias shakes his head. ''The fact they weren't there already gives them time to escape or plan a way out, this was a failure''.
''We should put them in observation then!'' Evangelia seems to be trying to argue more with her own brain than Nikias himself.
''Erik Sawdon is a Duke, to put him under criminal observation we would need my father's approval and the help of the Imperial Knights, for such a thing to happen a lot of steps are required and he would probably be informed beforehand. There's also the possibility of his family being involved, and since we do not erase bloodlines due to a parents' crime anymore, they would mostly just be bumped down from Duke to Count…'' Nikias sighs. ''And the fact that his son, Hugo Sawdon, is the Master of the Northern Magicians Tower already makes him almost untouchable if he's not directly involved''.
''Why would his son be involved?''
''The use of halflings? The monsters? The fact they were able to conceal this for so long already proves they had the assistance of a magician, his son being one of the most promising magicians of his generation is already proof enough'', Nikias says, trying hard not to ask if Evangelia was stupid, he can see in her eyes that she believes his words, but as the Crown Princess, she must run every scenario and try to remain logical.
She doesn't have all the facts.
Damn, even Nikias with full-knowledge of the future doesn't know all the facts.
Especially since the involvement of the Northern Magicians Tower was never mentioned in the original novel.
All he can do is put the pieces together and pray he put them in the right order.
Duke Sawdon was never mentioned in the novel as well, all I can assume is that Evangelia never managed to make the link between him and the Time Cult, the fact that she was unable to stop the Cult already speaks a lot. I was only able to make the connection due to Nikias' personal involvement with the Duke and Miyuki's statements of working for him.
The meeting continues for another two hours, discussions about what they must do, and even heated arguments about personal beliefs. At the end Nikias was absolutely worn out.
''Should I accompany you, your highness?'' Dacre asks, but the Prince shakes his head.
''Retire for the day, enjoy the last hours of your birthday, I'll walk on mother's garden for a bit before going to my quarters'', Nikias states with an exhausted sigh, he stops walking to feel the cold November air on his skin, taking a deep breath as he attempts to calm down his nerves. Regretting leaving the fairy in his room as she was sound asleep.
''As you wish, your highness, I'll see you tomorrow'', Dacre bows, leaving, he looks just as tired as Nikias, perhaps the hangover was hitting him harder than the Second Prince.
''A full moon so beautiful that it feels like a mockery'', Nikias mumbles to himself as he looks at the dark night sky, the stars are scarce, yet the moon shines brightly, as if it's happy due to his misery.
He walks slowly, going from the training grounds to the Empress' lilies garden, the perfume in the air and the cold breeze make the atmosphere less eerie, although he is walking alone at night in a place where a lot of people despise his existence.
Most times he would have felt too worried about his safety to do such a thing.
But today his mind wasn't working as hard as it often is.
And that could be a mistake or a blessing, depending on how he chooses to view the situation.
Why?
Well, because right at this moment, he finally meets the person he's been trying to meet for the past seven months.
Duke Erik Sawdon looks older than his 52 years of age, his skin is wrinkled and he has two big bald spots in his head, his clothes are elegant and well-made, mismatching the disgusting gaze of his black eyes. Nikias can recognize him due to a few portraits Lowe provided him of high-ranking nobles he should know of. However he does look considerably older than his portrait.
''Your grace'', Nikias says softly, his eyes don't waver but his heart accelerates as he sees the man.
''I greet the second star of the Empire'', he bows elegantly, no doubt he is a Duke through and through. Even if the things he's involved with are too disgusting to even mutter out loud.
''What do I give the honor of meeting you when you're too busy to respond to my meeting requests?'' Nikias tone is calm and collected, even if he doesn't feel so much so.
''My apologies your highness, my wife was unwell and between taking care of her and my state, I was neglectful to your highness' summons'', his response is perfect, robotic and trained, as if he had an answer to any of the Prince's questions even before he mutters it.
''Then you decided to speak to me without prior appointment in the middle of my mother's garden late at night? Since that was the proper way to answer my summons after so long, of course.'' His wording is harsh but he's allowed much so, he's higher in ranking than the Duke, he has nothing to fear.
The Duke flinches, but he doesn't answer the Prince's provocation. ''May I enquire about why you summoned me, your highness?''
''I would like for you to officialize the transfer of my assets''.
''We already had this conversation, your highness'', his tone is one of disappointment, which only makes Nikias mad. ''You're not capable of administrating such assets, and they're still yours, I'm simply assisting you''.
Ha, what a joke.
''However since your highness seems so pressed on the subject, I guess I could transfer half of them, of course that would be…'' he trails off, shaking his head. ''Nevermind, I shouldn't bother your highness with such subjects''.
''Whatever do you mean?''
''Well, a little bird informed me that the properties of your highness are going to be seized soon due to an Imperial investigation, I couldn't possibly pass them down to you with such bad omens in the air''.
Is he saying that the investigation will go to me if I get my own properties back? If he's the one overseeing them, of course he would be the one investigated, what a load of bullshit, how stupid he thinks I am?
The answer is quite obvious considering he was able to get thousands of gold coins by simply embezzling the funds that were supposed to go to the Second Prince for years on end.
Even if he heard the rumors of the Prince changing, it's hard to believe something when you don't see it in person, especially when you were already such an expert on the matters of using the Second Prince as you see fit.
For a Duke he's quite stupid.
However, regardless of how Nikias himself sees the situation, in everyone's eyes, believing his changes is stupid, how can someone change so fast? Especially the wild rumors that surround the Princes' wing at the Palace, some are exaggerated facts while others are nothing but fabricated information.
There are a lot of people that benefit from Nikias' lack of social stance, those taking advantage of him, those using him to get to the Crown Prince and those in the Crown Prince's side themselves, hoping the Second Prince will ruin himself so much that Alkaios will look like a Saint in comparison.
In this frame, Duke Sawdon is one of those using the Second Prince for personal benefit, although Nikias is unaware for now, the Duke has been forging his signature in the business regarding the estates he is overseeing.
Poor Duke Sawdon, being used by the Useless Prince to sponsor his evil doings. Tsk.
''Why would I be blamed for the choices and doings of others?'' Nikias says with a sigh, strongly attempting to hold back his mana, that's all he's been doing all day.
The Duke stares at the Prince for a moment before sighing, as if he was truly only thinking about the benefit of the Second Prince, not his own. ''I know you don't remember much, but your highness, you were the one that asked me to procure a business with the Whisperia Kingdom''.
Nikias freezes, his mana finally leaking, his heart pounds, he's sure the previous Nikias never signed or asked for such a thing, he was too obsessed with his brother to do something that would bring him so much shame, no, something that could bring others' the excuse to rip his status off.
Treason isn't childplay and even if the previous Nikias did do a lot of despicable things, he would never betray his family or his own nation.
Being a Prince was all he had, why would he risk it?
But again, how can he know? The Duke is right, he doesn't remember everything the previous Nikias did, nor were they all mentioned in the novel.
He could very well be conspiring with the Duke, that's unlikely, of course, the logical side of Nikias is yelling to him that this is all nonsense, however his more emotional side that seems to be blooming lately is telling him that he can't possible trust a guy that sold his sister-in-law off as a slave.
And again, nor can he trust the words of a master manipulator.
''That's not possible, your grace'', Nikias mumbles, the whole garden is shining gold, which startles the Duke, who seems unaware of the mana of the Prince. Nikias is almost hyperventilating, he shouldn't have drank that much wine earlier on, his brain is fogged and his heart is pounding as if he's about to have a heart attack. ''I would never do such a thing!'' He almost yells, he shouldn't be so emotional, why can't he control his emotions? Almost as if they're not his own.
But they are, even if he refuses to admit such a fact.
It's easier to blame the flaws in character on someone who's no longer alive, to say that he's emotional because that's how the previous Nikias would've felt, or that he feels wronged because the previous Nikias would feel so as well.
This way he can remain the calm and collected Mad Dog he always was.
This way he can hide from the sensitive and hurt boy he once was when Zerah was still alive.
''It's ok, your highness'', the Duke smiles softly, almost pitying the young Prince, his eyes are more treacherous than a snake's. ''Just leave it to me, I'll help you''.
''Help me?'' Nikias laughs, he's on the verge of a mental breakdown, and the Duke is starting to piss him off even more.
From afar, no one would dare to approach the two, a garden fully lightened by golden sparks as warm as the sun itself, the lilies that were in full-bloom are starting to wither due to the excessive heat. Even the Duke is starting to sweat, although he doesn't realize it is because of Nikias' mana, all he thinks is that those sparks are just a fancy trick the Prince learned.
''Leave before I call the Knights, you're crossing the line, your grace. If you think you can threaten me, be my guest, but remember to clean after your own mess before doing so. Your house is entirely made of glass and I am not going to hesitate in throwing the first pebble to bring it all down'', Nikias says, his breath unstable, his eyes are glowing in an unreal tone of gold, not only that but his hair is starting to change tones as well, not that it is noticeable amidst the huge amount of mana he's leaking right now.
On the other side, the Duke is starting to feel the pressure of a Saint's mana, difficulty breathing, soaked in sweat and even the pressure in his chest, he can't even think in this situation where the Prince looks extremely intimidating.
''I'll speak to you again soon, your highness'', the Duke bows, taking his leave.
Once he's gone from his line of sight, Nikias collapses on the floor, grasping for air and clenching his clothes on top of his heart. He doesn't cry, but he feels as if he's going to.
''Shh, it's okay Vahe, take a deep breath, you're safe here with me, I'll do everything I can so that we survive, and even if one of us doesn't, let's promise to continue living on for the other. We deserve happiness, after years of pain, we will be happy. I promise you brother, this pain we feel, it won't last forever. I love you, for now, let us use our love for each other to quell the pains of our body and mind''.
Zerah's words ring inside his brain, a new memory from his childhood, when was this from? Does it even matter? How can he use the love his brother feels from him to appease this pain when his brother isn't even there anymore?
I would give my life for yours in a heartbeat, Nikias thinks, taking a deep breath, calming down his nerves regardless. Why would the universe give me this second chance but not to him? He deserves far more.
With such thoughts, he gets up again, slowly walking back to the Palace, trying to not think about what just happened, at least not before he can calm his nerves down. This is a situation he needs to grasp with a clear head, which he clearly doesn't have right now.
❥
But even if Nikias awakened with his thoughts in place and felt much calmer, there was no point in reflecting on his interaction with Duke Sawdon anymore.
Early in the morning, when the birds didn't even start chirping yet, the door of the Second Prince's door opens suddenly with Fleuri entering quickly, he's clearly exhausted and his hair and clothes are a mess as if he dressed while still half-asleep.
''Your highness'', he calls the Prince who awakened with the sound of his door slamming open by his aide.
''What?'' Nikias mumbles, slightly irritated.
''Duke Sawdon is dead''.
Silence.
''I probably misheard you due to my sleepiness, can you repeat what you just said, please?'' Nikias says slowly, his mouth becoming dry as his head spins.
''Duke Erik Sawdon passed away two hours ago at his house'', Fleuri repeats, this time with more details, he seems just as shocked as Nikias, his expression is one of helplessness, all of their plans, their months of work, tossed down the drain in just a few hours.
''That's not… That's simply not possible'', Nikias mumbles. ''How could he be dead?'' His eyes are open in shock, he rests his head on his hands trying to grasp the situation, or to at least think of a solution.
The idea of waking up as a different person was an easier pill to swallow.
''Apparently he killed himself while everyone else was asleep, the one that found his body was his wife'', Fleuri states, closing the door of the Prince's room. ''What should we do now, your highness? If he truly killed himself, then fine, everything can be worked out. But if he didn't…''
''I'll be the prime suspect'', Nikias doesn't even need Fleuri to say it. Of course he would, the amount of letters of summon he sent could be borderline obsessive, and if anyone witnessed his talk with the Duke the night before would point him out as an aggressive part that made the Duke leave with threats. Even the fact that he was struggling to get the Duke to give him his assets back. And if what the Duke said was even slightly true, and his name is on the documents of the smuggling of the mana stones, then, that would even make him look more guilty. ''This is hell'', he whispers.
''We need to forge a plan, if we don't, we're going to get eaten up by his family, and now that he's dead all of the investigation in his name will disappear''.
Nikias sighs, pushing his silver hair back. ''Call Raphael and Lowe for me, we'll forge a new plan together.'' He gets up from his bed, walking towards his closet to change. ''Who told you this?''
''Half-elves also have good hearing, you know'', Fleuri sighs. ''Sometimes when I struggle to sleep I tend to overhear the conversation from other rooms near mine…'', he pauses for a moment before sighing, as if he was revealing some sort of big secret. ''I overheard the report from Lord Xylon to the Crown Prince''.
''That far?'' Nikias asks, surprised, but then he shakes his head, it isn't time for that. ''It was a good thing, regardless of if it was correct or not''.
''My apologies'', Fleuri bows, apologetic.
''No matter, if you keep your lips sealed to others apart from me, little do I care''.
Nikias taps his finger on the door of the closet, holding it open as he thinks. ''Before you call up the twins, forge a letter to the Duke's residence in my name asking the Duke about the discrepancies on the ledgers of my assets, make sure it looks as if it was open and old. Ask Dacre to infiltrate his office and plant the letter there'', Nikias nods alongside his words. ''Sign as my aide but mention that the inquiry is coming from me, the more proof you attach the better, but try to make it before sunrise''.
''If someone finds out…''
''...Then it'll be yours and Dacre's head on the line'', Nikias answers without looking at Fleuri. ''So make sure it's perfect''.
Fleuri flinches, but he nods and bows. ''As you wish, your highness, it will be done''.
Once the aide leaves the Prince's room, Nikias sighs, his legs trembling. ''How much longer must I stand this? Should I truly simply run away?'', he whispers to himself before entering the closet to change his clothes and start another hell of a day.