When you're lost, you'll find someone who will help you light your way. But in my case, I am lost, and a stranger blew up my mind. I am now the most lost person ever!
#13: Pure Heart
"Listen to me, young women, an advice from an older man," he said and he looked at me seriously. "Don't be distracted. Don't focus on your goal. You must open your eyes. Widely. Beware of the real enemy, Emcee."
My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. What was he meant by that? I looked at Crisostomo who is now thinking so deep, and not focusing on the mass. Elias already left him hanging.
"What are you saying? Do you know anything? How did you know my name?" I asked him but my eyes are still focused on Crisostomo. I don't hear any reply that's why I look at him.
Surprisingly, he is nowhere to be found. "M-mister?"
He can't left me hanging! I have so many questions in my mind and he must help me to answer them.
I stand up to find him but I can't still see him. He wears a fisherman outfit. Simple long sleeves and pants but I can feel that he is not an ordinary character here.
"Binibining Maria Clara, why are you standing? What are you up to?" Marites asked me. I motioned her to shut up. I put my finger to my lips.
"Maria Clara, sit down. Padre Damaso is not yet done to his homily. You want him to mention you? Sit down and listen!" Captain Tiago said strictly.
Whatever! I don't care about him, and I also don't need their pemission. I will leave whenever I want, especially this time I need to lighten up my mind! Afterall, I am not Maria Clara, I am Manuela Carie Flores!
"Maria Clara!"
I run as fast as I can to find Mr. Mysterious. I don't care about them anymore. All I want now is to know the truth. I feel like I don't know everything in this novel.
How could I know all of them? I just read it once and I don't memorize all of it.
"Mr. Mysterious! Where are you?!" I shouted. There's no one here because it's already evening and they are all in the church.
Maybe Mr. Librarian has many things to explained to me. Even though he explained very well, I feel like it is filtered so I must know the whole truth.
"Mister Mysterious? Where the fuck--- what the fuck are you?!" I shouted because I was shocked. I just saw a man with a leper.
I saw the man how the man furrowed and move his steps backward while shaking his shoulders. I come closer to him so that he won't feel discriminated. I am not judgmental. I was just in shock.
"Oh, I'm sorry. You're not fucked up, I fucked up," I speak worriedly because I might hurt him again. He looked confused now. "I mean I am messed up."
I sat down beside him. I didn't care if he has leprosy all over his body—it's not contagious.
He distanced himself when I come closer to him. Wow. Look at this man. He acted like I have a COVID-19! I am quite offended,n
"Hey, Handsome! Come a little closer. I won't bite you!" I don't know why I am sitting here and chilling like a villain instead of finding the mysterious man.
Actually, I sympathize with him. Other people are judging him because of his disease, but did they ever think that he is hurting too? Have they ever tried to understand his situation? People are selfish.
"Binibini, I don't want you to be affected by my disease. You may leave now while you are not yet affected."
"Aish! So dramatic! I don't mind! It's not contagious," I smiled and I tapped my side. I am just sitting on the floor because there's no bench here. He followed me but he still has distance. One meter apart. "What's your name?"
"Uhm it's not important," he said awkwardly.
"You are Binibining Maria Clara, right? You are the daughter of Captain Tiago. You are lucky. You are born with a golden spoon in your mouth."
I sighed. Is he implying that I am a nepo baby?People think that if a person is wealthy, they don't have problems. It's very untrue. We also had problems, but not in financial.
Like me, my problem is that I am stupid and I can't figure it out easily.
"Yeah, but you know what? It's easier if you have a simple life. If we have a simpler life, the we will just have a simple problem. We have different problems in life, some are having financial hardships, some have mental problem, some have family problems, some have relationship problems, some have health problems, and some have legal problems. Well, you are so lucky if you have them all," I said and laugh, "I'll tell you my problem, I am a celebrity and I feel like I'm about to fall like a London bridge because I have a lot of bashers, I also have death threats—like if you go out, you don't know if you can go back home safe and sound, in showbiz life you don't know who is your real enemy and friends," I remember so many people.
"You said a lot of things but I understand none of them," he said and sighed. I glared at him as if I am ready to punch him. How dare him! I said many things yet he doesn't understand a thing. "But I'm sure that your hardships are nothing compared to my experience."
I stopped for a moment because of what he said. Is he comparing our hardships? Is this a competition?
Then, I realized, I may be insensitive. I didn't realize that he has a lot of bullying experience—and this novel is not about me! It's about the characters! Stop oversharing, Emcee!
"Why? What did they do to you?" I asked. He sighed before he answers.
"I am living like this for four years. Some say that I inherited this from my mother. Others say that I got this from jail. I am living in a Chinese memorial park, because I am distancing myself from others but sometimes the captain is hitting me—well, it's not your father."
My heart broke into pieces. How could someone live in the memorial park? He's alive yet he is living in dead people's place.
"Why did that outrageous captain hit you?"
"Oh. It's because I saved someone who almost fell from the canal. That canal is full of wastes, dead rats, and dirt that is why I felt like I must save the kid, however the captain said that it's way better to fall from the canal than to be affected by my disease."
My jaw dropped because of what he said. I felt the rage inside of me. That captain is really cruel! This old man is just saving the kid, but he still chose to judge. What a stupid human being. Is he even human?
"If I were you, I push him to the canal so that he will experience falling in the canal full of garbages. Eew!" I said and I cringed.
Surprisingly, the old man giggled heartily. I smiled because I make him smile. His problem is quite hard, that's why I felt so fulfilled when I saw him laughing.
"Have you eaten, Mister?" I asked him. He just shrugged.
"I don't have money and even if I have, they won't consider me as a customer because they don't want to be affected by my disease."
I let out a heavy sigh. I can't help it but I felt like my heart was stabbed because of what I heard. People are not treating him like a human being. Well, even if he is just a fictional character, he is still a human—at least in this world.
I put my hand in my pocket to search for my wallet but I don't bring any. Oh my, I forgot! I have nothing to give him. I can't leave him without giving anything.
Well, except for one thing. I saw the necklace hanging on my neck. I don't remember where I got this but my heart and mind are telling me to give it to this kind man.
I remove my necklace from my neck and I immediately give it to him.
"It's all yours now. That's a gift from me. You can keep it if you want, or you can sell it if you want. Whatever! It's up to you!" I said while smiling.
I may not be the kindest person in the world, and I may have committed many sins, but I know that I have a heart. I am helping him sincerely with my heart.
-
WHEN I went home, of course, I got scolded. What do you expect with Captain Tiago? He has a high blood! I will tell him to stop eating pork, tsk tsk tsk!
"You, little rascal! You don't think of our reputation anymore, don't you? You humiliated us again! You leave the church while the mass is on going—how could you?! What would people think of you? A rude?! Do you want to be called like that?! Or worst, an erehe?"
"Primo, that's enough," Aunt Isabel said while caressing my back.
Captain Tiago left us, while stomping his feet.
Aunt Isabel faced me while frowning. "Why did you do that earlier?" She said frustratedly. She looked at Crisostomo.
Oh! He is here?
He looked like he got 99 problems saying bye bye bye, but he smiled when he met my eyes.
"I'll be leaving," Aunt Isabel said and left without my permission! Did I allowed her? Just kidding y'all
It's only the two of us now in the living room—except for Marites. Of course, she's always there. She's my personal assistant, and she is a Marites (Karen version in Filipino)
Crisostomo walked closer to me. "My dearest, Maria, why did you leave while Padre Damaso was having his sermons? "
I arched my right brow because of his endearment.
My dearest, Maria?
I told them to call me Emcee! Maria sounds so old. That's my grandma's name!
"It's just that something happened." Oh my! Because I was distracted by the man who've got leptospirosis. I forgot my real mission! To find that stranger, but somehow familiar! He knows my name!
"Is that so?" He holds both of my hands. I thought that he will ask me what happened but surprisingly, he just asked, "are you feeling okay?"
"Well, yeah..." I am surprised by his attitude. He is the best man I ever met in my life because he is concerned about me.
Unfortunately, he is not real.
He is nothing but a fictional man made by Jose Rizal.
He closed the space between us and hugged me. Is this allowed? He even caressed my hair. "You know that I am always here for you whenever you're sad, happy, angry, and whatever emotions you feel and you will feel. I am always for you because I love you from the bottom of my heart," he said.
I am surprised at how straightforward he is. As always. He is a real man and he is the dream of every girl. In our generation, he might be the greenest flag of all, a boyfriend and even a husband material. He is too good to be true, that's why he's not true.
I also hate how my heart beats so fast.
[ILYSB BY: LANY]
[Aint' never felt this way
Can't get enough so stay with me
It's not like we got big plans
Let's drive around town holding hands]
[And you need to know
You're the only one, alright, alright
And you need to know
That you keep me up all night, all night]
[Oh, my heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad
Oh, oh my heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad]
I saw how Marites' eyes widened and scatched his hair. Perhaps she have dandruffs? I widened my eyes to her too and acted that I zipped my mouth to tell her that this scene—Crisostomo and I hugging—shouldn't be reported to AI and CT.
"Oh, Maria, my dearest, do you want to come with me? Let's visit the place I am planning to build for hopeless children," he said, and his dimples flexed so effortlessly.
Look how kind he is! I already read that Crisostomo is kind and honorable but it hits different now that I know him personally.
"Sure! It is so nice of you to think of other children," I said smiling. Actually, I am not that vocal person butI think, he deserved to know it.
He smiled at me.
"You know, Maria? I believe that youths are the hope of our country."
I stopped for a moment because of what he said. He really is made by Dr. Jose Rizal. That was Rizal's words that are so famous and always used by youths of today's generation, and I believe they will still use it in the future.
[Mad cool in all my clothes
Mad warm when you get close...to me
Slow dance these summer nights
Our disco ball's my kitchen light]
[And you need to know
That nobody could take your place, your place
And you need to know
That I'm hella obsessed with your face, your face]
[Oh, my heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad
Oh, oh my heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad
Oh, oh my heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad...oh]
[And ya need to know
You're the only one, alright, alright
And ya need to know
That ya keep me up all night, all night]
[My heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad
Oh, oh my heart hurts so good
I love you, babe, so bad, so bad...oh
So bad, oh
Oh, my heart hurt...
Oh, my heart hurt...
Oh, my heart hurt...
So bad...oh]
And when I was about to hug him because I am really amazed at what he said, Mr. Librarian showed up from afar. He is glaring at me like I did a crime. His eyes are on fire and he is holding a clock necklace.
I do not know why I felt my goosebumps. Why do feel like I am scared of Simoun—I shouldn't, because I didn't do anything bad!
Well, I didn't violate rules, right?
Or left?
#