I have long lost the sense of time, spending hours alone has made me fall into a hollow emptiness from inside out. But, it somehow made me forget my past sorrows and mistakes that almost no-one performs at such age. But, If I recognize such things as childish mistakes, aren't I not a child anymore? I am mature enough to realise my mistakes, but I guess solving them requires another mental age.
The sun shined as brightly as ever into my darkest thoughts, burning them all along with me. I did not realise I got burnt, but that is just the cost of being an idiot and a couch potato. The balcony really is a brilliant place to have your morning in, nonetheless.
I feel like this is a form of escapism cause I still cannot get over my love for my family. I have lost our bond in one seamless night, but what did I gain? A life so bland and empty of love, isn't much of a life. It's disguised as a so-called one to grasp your time and pull you away from your heavy responsibilities. I refuse to let my life go like this. I enjoy time alone, but loss is a different kind of alone.
I searched everywhere in his house looking for a clue, one that leads me to my source of happiness. The one and only time I will ever feel love. My mistakes are getting heavier and heavier on my heart as I start panic-searching. The smell of old books hit me like a wave of nostalgia, it calmed my senses a little. It was a matter of time till I found a small box. It seemed like its owner was a prestigious collector because nothing seems to have a small bit of modernism implemented, nor does it have a bad look to it. It devoured my vintage loving soul alive. This was my dream room. I finally managed to pull the box out, but it seemed a little too odd. Almost like it holds magic to it. It was surrounded by bits of what seemed like wind, but it could be seen by the naked eye.
I tried regaining my senses before I started writing a small letter and as soon as I put it back, it disappeared completely. leaving no trace of anything, not even as precise as dust particles.
I didn't want to seem a bit too blunt to the system, and I didn't have anywhere else to write. So, I wrote with a UV pen that I found in this weird man's little toy drawer. He doesn't know it yet, but I wrote…And then I forgot what was in there right after its disappearance. Here goes my thoughts again.