Time used to feel like a festival to me—loud, colorful, and overwhelming. Some moments were bright and exciting, full of laughter and noise, while others felt suffocating in their sameness. It passed quickly, yet somehow dragged on at the same time.
There were moments I wished I could stop time, erase a mistake, or relive something that made me happy. But time never listens. It moves forward with steady patience, unshakable and indifferent. No matter how much I replay a moment in my head to comfort myself, time continues at its own pace.
As steady as someone may seem, they can be an emotional wreck inside. Just one word can make a difference—the difference between life and death. The ability to break one's spirit or lift it up. And for me, it was both.So when he reached out his hand, I thought it would be the same as always. Another ordinary moment. Another time spent together out of obligation. But he kept telling me that the time we spent together made him happy. That it mattered.
So I decided to try. This never-ending monotony needed to stop.
"Bae, are you okay?" I rush through the front door into her room. "Joel said you were getting cold. I'm sorry for leaving you outside for so long—I got lost in thought."
"I'm fine," Bae says lightly. "I'm not coming down with a cold—I rebuke that. It just got chilly, and I ran into David. We walked back together." She slowly turns her head toward Joel.
"I didn't mean she was sick," Joel says. "I just meant she was cold. I don't want you to get sick."
David taps Joel lightly on the back. "Relax. She knows."
Bae smiles. "Boys, can you give us a minute? Girls' talk."
I look at her, confused, as David and Joel start exiting the room.
"Dinner will be ready in forty minutes," Joel says, pausing at the door. "Mom just got back with groceries."
"She bought groceries?" I ask.
"Taco ingredients. It got dark fast, so we're skipping the barbecue. I'll leave you two now… bye, Adah."
"Bye."
As the door closes, I turn back to Bae, and she immediately makes a funny face, mimicking his voice.
"I'll leave you two now… bye, Adah."
"Bae, stop," I laugh. "That's not how he sounded."
"Yes, it is. And your eyes were glued to him."
"They were not."
"They absolutely were," she says, crossing her arms. "Did he ask you out?"
I freeze. "How did you know?"
Bae's teasing smile softens. "You know… he didn't seem as confident as he usually does."
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"When he mentioned you, he hesitated," she says. "Like he was worried he'd misunderstood something. Like he didn't want to mess it up."
I blink. "Joel?"
"Yeah," she nods. "He's not as fearless as he pretends to be."
The thought settles quietly in my chest, warmer than I expect.
"…Yeah," I finally say. "He asked me out."
Bae squeals, grabbing my hands. We laugh until my cheeks hurt and my stomach aches, barely able to catch our breath as I tell her everything that happened at the café. I've never explained something so carefully before.
Bae is my first female best friend. I've never told anyone outside my family about my true feelings.
A week until Christmas. Two days since he asked me out. Today is the day.
"What are you wearing?" Bae asks.
"I don't know. Jeans don't feel right for a first date, so I'm wearing my favorite dress."
She helps me get ready, fixing my hair and pinning it gently in place.
"You look amazing," she says. "You won't be cold, right?"
"I'll be fine," I laugh. "I'm covered everywhere that matters."
A knock comes at the door, and my heart jumps.
"You look beautiful, Adah," Joel says softly. "The dress suits you perfectly. And your hair—it's really cute."
"Thank you," I say. "You look really handsome today."
"Really?" he asks, surprised.
"Yes. Very charming."
Outside, the air is much colder than I expect. I adjust my coat instinctively.
"You sure you're not cold?" he asks, slowing his pace.
"I'm sure."
We walk for a moment in silence. Not uncomfortable—just loud in my head.
"I was worried you wouldn't come," he admits suddenly, rubbing the back of his neck. "I kept thinking maybe I read everything wrong."
I look at him, surprised.
"I almost said no," I confess quietly.
"But you didn't."
"No," I say. "I didn't want to miss this."
He smiles, slower this time. Real.
We stop in front of a small, softly lit store.
Le Lumière est ma vie.
Maybe we're falling in love. Or maybe I've been there longer than I wanted to admit. I used to think love needed perfect timing, but standing here, I realize it only needs courage.
I breathe in slowly and let myself stay. For once, I don't rush the moment. For once, I let time move naturally. And for once, that feels enough.
The store carries a feeling of safety, and… it looks like a chocolate factory!
"Wait, Joel, is this a chocolate factory?!"
"Yes, it is."
"This is the best. How did you remember? I told you I liked chocolate factories a long time ago."
"I don't know," he replies, scratching the back of his head. "I just remember, I suppose. I'm glad you like it."
"Of course she'd like it. This place is special," an old lady says as she walks down a curved staircase. "This place is not your normal chocolate factory. It is a mint chocolate factory."
"Hi, Grandma," Joel says, turning to look at me. "This is my grandma, Sarah Sali. She owns this chocolate factory and the other two across the street."
"Oh, hello. I'm Adah Nsoh, Joel's date."
"Date!" both Joel and his grandma say in surprise.
"Why are you surprised, Jr? She is your date, is she not?"
"Yes, she is, Grandma." He smiles at me brightly, like a kid who just won a big prize at an amusement park.
"Well, I won't hold you two young ones any longer. I'll be on my way Jr, tell your mother to come by the store tomorrow. She needs to help me with a few things."
"Your grandmother seems sweet, Joel."
"Yeah, she is very kind and sweet. And she is especially kind to her grandson's date." He looks at me, and the widest grin grows on his face.
"So you're my date?"
"Of course I am. Or should I have called myself your friend?"
"No, I like date. I just never expected you to make the first move."
He smiles, but there's something careful in it, like he's measuring his words instead of letting them spill. The air smells sweet—mint and chocolate—and for a moment, everything feels quiet and warm, like the world has slowed just for us.
"Well, you better be ready for more. If I've decided to go out with someone for the first time, I better put my all into it. So I hope this is not a half-hearted stunt on your part."
"You can trust me and believe in me. It's not half-hearted. I want to see things the way you do, and to do so, I will be with you."
"Okay, let's go. I want to look around the factory now."
"'Okay is your answer? Why is it so nonchalant?"
"Nonchalant? What was I supposed to say—that I also want to see the way you do and… that's so cheesy."
We break into laughter, walking further into the factory.
I don't want to return.
The overwhelming feelings I detest.
A friend I love.
My deepest secrets told.
Compliments, a slow pacing—
perfect just for me.
He is sheepish, yet brave.
Love is his way of living.
Expressions of affirmation and love.
Words carry power.
Therefore, I'll start.
I love you so much—
kindly believe me.