Narcissa left her son to Madam Pomfrey to go home to her own bed after being in the infirmary for two days. She saw the color in her son's face return and the dark circles recede as he slept. He slept like the dead. She watched as her son seemed to grow healthier. She didn't notice earlier but he had even grown thinner. She kept wondering what had taken her son from happy loving boy to… well her husband. She would never tell him this but he reminded her so much of Lucius before he lost his magic, and he was a strong abuser. The arctic glare in his ice eyes as he looked at Hermione was one she had seen many times when Lucius became angry, and then murdered house elves, and nearly killed her.
When Hermione visited him she saw the way the girl tugged on her sleeves, and looked at her hands. Draco would reach for her and she would flinch. She knew that type of flinch. It was the type of flinch a beaten dog would give his master when the master would reach for them. Before she left for home she told Hermione of her observation, and asked if her son had physically abused her. It was a hard conversation full of strain. By the end of the thick exchange Narcissa had the girl weeping in her arms. He never hit her, but one day he grabbed her wrist when she went to walk away when he was not Draco. He frightened her. Later she found small bruises on her wrist from the ferocity of his grip. Hermione begged Narcissa to figure out what was wrong with her best friend. All she could do was nod and tell her she would die before anything would happen to both her and Draco.
Once home she floo-called Amelia and they talked of what happened. The Head of the Auror's told Narcissa she would check into the occurrence with the Department of Mysteries. Narcissa was grateful, but there was a slight pinch in the middle of her chest. Was Amelia so willing to help because they became lovers? True she always helped the blonde but the Auror made Narcissa pay for it with witty banter and flirtation. Did Narcissa sell her body for a hole to be filled in her chest and information? She pushed those thoughts aside as she agreed to being a part time nurse for Hogwarts when the need arises, or when Draco turns again, and that she would work the Auror training schedule and being a part time healer at Hogwarts. Shockingly Amelia was on board with Narcissa taking the part time activity. She knew then Susan would be in good hands, and so would those children. Narcissa was surprised by the slight feeling of domesticity. Lover, friends, tell me about your day, support your life, and then reciprocate and then repeat. It was nice, and if she didn't think too hard it felt right. Thus was her planned schedule for the next 3 months…. Until the letters began.
Narcissa,
Hi, um… hello. How are you? I hope you are well and you are healthy. I am sorry I have not sent you a letter earlier. It has been two weeks and I am just now trying to uphold our deal and write you at least once a week. Please forgive me. So far Draco is himself, and I feel as if I have my friend back.
Harry and Ron are doing well also and Harry has said he hasn't heard any voices since our visit to Hogsmeade. I think that's wonderful. I have seem one or two horror movies in the muggle world about hearing voices, and someone is being possessed, then and exorcism, and then mass quantities of dead bodies. I shudder at the thought of such a depiction of a scene in real life. I hate those movies.
I feel very strange writing to you. I know you are my magical guardian, and I know you are my friend, and our families have grown quite close, but I feel very strange writing you. I don't know what it is, I can't pin point it. I hope it is alright if my thoughts ramble, and you are also alright with my ability to have forgotten a filter in my letters. It seems easier to say things on paper than it does with my own words. Again please forgive me for rambling. It is time for bed and we have a test tomorrow. Have a great evening.
Sincerely,
Hermione
Narcissa smiled at the letter as she sipped her cup of tea. She winced as she leaned forward and shifted in her chair. Amelia realized she was much more advanced in the dark arts than she'd anticipated. Amelia even remarked that she was further along than half of the auror training program and inquired as to how she had such a grasp of tactics and strategy on the battlefield. Narcissa never really thought of it. She was a Black. They knew how to fight, hell it was like a daily battlefield, and or duel in that house and it was quick thinking, and assessment of ones surroundings that made you survive the onslaught of hexes from her sisters as she grew up. So Amelia brought in a hit squad for training today and she fared well. The entire structure, and grounds of Black Hall became a battlefield where it was one against seven. Narcissa was greeted by Amelia and the seven hit aurors who are volunteering their time. Three men and four women were to hunt her down, and apprehend her. She was simply to survive 2 hours. The stuck-up seven sneered at her and she raised her eyebrow.
One woman, the spokesperson for the group bluntly said, "It would be an honor to have 2 hours to beat the shit out of a Malfoy." Narcissa glared at the woman but kept her mouth shut. She was given 60 seconds before she was to be hunted. By the end of the 2 hours she was standing, busted, bloodied and bruised, but standing. She was trading hexes with the last two remaining Aurors and when Amelia called time. Narcissa sighed and walked toward Amelia and the two other Aurors walked with her silently. The spokesperson seemed to have changed her tone at the end of this meeting. Amelia waited for the remaining Aurors, and then looked at Narcissa. Narcissa waved her wand and a few moments later the rest of the hit team came limping from down the hall rubbing their shoulders, and heads.
"Everyone is dismissed. It looks like if a rich housewife can go toe to toe with a hit squad of seven people it is time for more training." Amelia watched Narcissa as she finally spoke.
"I am a Black, not a Malfoy. You should do well to remember that," she gritted to the woman from earlier. She was pissed off, and her anger rolled off her in waves. Amelia watched as her team apparated off the grounds. She reached out to take Narcissa's hand and she leaned in to kiss her lover. Narcissa kissed her back but it was all she could do not to cringe. Over the past few weeks she had begun to distance herself from Amelia emotionally. She was still very friendly with her, and even affectionate, but she had become rather emotionless, as if she was going through the motions of a routine day. In essence she was. She hated herself for realizing she had not stopped this affair when it dawned on her the only reason why she kept Amelia around was for sex. Amelia smiled at her lover, and told her she would see her later, and Narcissa said well good because she could barely move. She loved her banter with her friend she just hated what she was doing.
When Narcissa reached for a quill and parchment she smiled as she felt her aches and pains. She took on a hit squad and survived.
Hermione,
I am delighted to have received your letter. I am not angry with your timing or delay on your owl. I am well and I hope you are as healthy. I am very happy you gave me an update on my son. He has not written me since I left the infirmary. I am happy he is beginning to be himself once more and your bond of friendship is as strong as ever.
I am unsure of Mr. Potter's voices but it is peculiar and I hope it doesn't lead to any events. I know how you children seem to attract trouble. I can ask you not to seek out trouble but I would not be respecting you as the person you are. I know you are strong and curious, and those are foolish Gryffindor qualities. Before you begin to think I called you a fool, I simply meant that with these qualities many seem to leap into action before thinking. Hermione, do try to think before acting, my little lion.
What is a movie? I dare say that if it shows you horrible pictures then dear girl stop looking! This muggle device sounds horrid, and uncouth. Very unrefined if it shows images of such disastrous events. Are muggles always looking at death, and depravity? If so I am surprised at how … appropriate you came to be and so well balanced. Our horrors in the magical world are in books. Maybe some of our moving pictures show bloody scenes, but never as bad as my imagination when thinking on with your description. I also shudder to think of such proceedings coming to pass.
Never ever think you cannot talk to me. I am always here for you and Draco. I find writing to you very easy and I think this is going to be a fantastic relationship through letters. You are eloquent and funny, and do not ramble. If you do ramble, remember you are talking to a friend, and rambling is fine. It is getting late here as well. Please give my son a hug and tell him I miss him dearly.
Always,
Narcissa
Narcissa nodded when she sealed of the letter and sent it on its way with an owl. She thought about her son and found another parchment and began.
My Dearest Son,
I am writing to you to tell you that I have been busy. I have taken an interest in defensive magic and have accepted the position at Hogwarts to be a part time healer when Madam Pomfrey is in need of assistance, or even a day off.
I have missed you dearly and have much to teach you and show you next time we meet. I can't wait for Halloween and our annual Samhain rituals. It will hopefully be a wonderful change from last year with trolls, and broken limbs. I will come by and retrieve you some time that afternoon. I miss you, I love you.
Your Loving Mother
Narcissa sent the owl off with a letter to her son and hoped that he would reply. She would not push, and she was delighted to know he was doing well through Hermione, but she missed her son.
Narcissa felt weeks fly by and had received many letters from Hermione with topics ranging from marks in class, to disputes with her friends, and then a large chunk of the student body getting the cold and flu. Narcissa chuckled at the girl in her letters. She saw the woman she would become but this was a insight far into the girl or the woman, it was into the heart and soul of the person that has such a large part of her heart. Amelia seemed to notice Narcissa's lack of emotion and love when it came to intimacy. To Narcissa it was amazing she would notice this right after Amelia screamed her orgasm and collapsed on top of Narcissa or under Narcissa. Amelia broached the subject one evening in late October.
"I can see you love," Amelia whispered as she cupped Narcissa's cheek and pulled her into a soft kiss making the blonde look at her. Narcissa let her eyes say what she could not.
Thank you for loving me but I can't love you.
I love you as a friend, but not as a lover, but thank you for physically fulfilling a role and a spot in my heart that has been vacant for so long.
Thank you for everything, but I can't use you like this for much longer.
I love you so very much but my heart belongs to another.
Narcissa let a tear slide from the corner of her eye and run into her temple hairline. Amelia looked at her finally and saw her pain. Amelia held her lover, caressed her back, and apologized.
"You told me it would be nothing more than an affair and I was willing to love you for many years, at least until you began to love Hermione Granger. Oh Narcissa I was a fool. You even told me you loved her. You love that girl, maybe not romantically yet, but it will happen and your heart will never let me in. I did this, I made this about me, and my desires," Amelia began to let her tears fall, and then she turned to remove herself from the bed. Narcissa reached out and stopped her and asked her not to leave. Blue eyes bore in to blue.
"I may not love you but I do need you. Never think I never need you. You are loved by me Milly. I just don't love as deeply as you. Come to bed. Sleep with me. I don't care if it is 10 years from now. I am not sharing a bed with anyone. I would love to share my bed with you," Narcissa craved a person to simply hold her, talk to her, and stroked her back while she slept. Maybe now she was being selfish by asking Amelia, who clearly felt head over heels for her, to stay. Both women put on pajamas even though they both loved to sleep nude.
"Can I come over from time to time to sleep?" Amelia asked in the space between them as they looked at each other. Narcissa scooted over and took her friend in her arms. Amelia's head rest on her shoulder and she wrapped her arm around Narcissa's waist.
"Of course. You are still my friend. We just share something very intimate and so very beautiful," Narcissa said as she smoothed the hair out of Amelia's eyes and kissed her temple. Narcissa felt a weight lift off her chest. It felt like freedom and for once a disastrous situation worked out in her favor. She kept her love in her heart, her friend in her heart, and her bedmate in her bed. She slept and didn't dream about how she manipulated and used this wonderful and gorgeous woman. She slept and dreamt about her past, and a smile that lit up the room.