My eyes opened with a hazy flutter. I looked around the dark room, blinking a few times as I struggled to will myself into wakefulness.
As I did, I vaguely noted that I was lying on a bed. It was rather comfortable and soft… so it most likely wasn't Hiratsuka-sensei's old, springy mattress then. So that meant that I wasn't currently in Hiratsuka-sensei's apartment bedroom.
That only left one possibility: that I was lying in my own bed, in my own room.
It seemed as if I had been doing that a lot more lately – simply escaping to my bed when I felt annoyed or troubled, which admittedly was growing to be more often these days. I found it odd that I found it odd to be waking up in my own bed.
I threw my legs haphazardly over the side, and rubbed at my eyes to clear the blurriness that had formed there. When I finally succeeded, I took a second to simply absorb my surroundings. Judging from how dark my room looked, I deduced that it was most likely around midnight. It wasn't surprising for me to wake up some time in the middle of night to relieve myself or grab a snack from the kitchen before heading back and finishing out the rest of my REM cycles, though oddly enough I didn't particularly feel hungry nor did my bladder feel full.
With a crack of my neck and a lazy stretch of my arms, I regarded the clock at my bedside to confirm what I already knew. But as I did, I found that the red LED numbers displayed there surprised me. It was 7:35. And that was PM.
I blinked once as I grabbed the clock. Huh? I had to have been sleeping for way longer than that. What had I… Oh, that's right. I'd skipped school.
Between my still sleep-muddled mind and the disorientation of waking up so suddenly, it looked like I had completely lost my bearings for a second. I groaned as half-realized memories of the day and the day prior flooded into my thoughts, that confrontation between Hiratsuka-sensei and Yukinoshita lying distinctly at the forefront.
The piercing hostility and those brutal words that had been exchanged between the two in that office still drifted around in my mind, feeling just as fresh as they were when they'd been spoken the day before. Hiratsuka-sensei's cruel, biting words forged to burn and hurt, and Yukinoshita's cold calculation, and finally… the quiet. That strange smile Yukinoshita had worn as she'd calmly walked down that empty hallway.
It still troubled me to think about it.
I'd skipped school today. Like so many times before, I'd escaped into the comfort of my sheets, and what a peaceful reprieve it had been. But like all good things, it wasn't meant to last.
I didn't fancy myself a quitter. I knew that running from my problems was pointless in every possible regard. Simply brushing something off and saving it for later was a tactic that was destined to fail from the start. Shirking your responsibilities and childishly ignoring a problem while willing it to disappear with all your feigned might was a gigantic waste of time. It accomplished nothing and if anything, it just made the problem worse.
I knew that, but I just hadn't been able to help myself this morning when my eyes fluttered open and I was hit with the sudden recollection of the intense conversation that I had overheard yesterday afternoon. Komachi had come into my room to call me up this morning in what was an interesting role reversal, me usually being the one to lug her lazy butt out of bed, but today, I'd simply smashed my pillow over my ears and ignored her. I might even have yelled at her when she kept insisting that I get up. I couldn't remember; the morning was still a blur.
But now as I sat there on my bed, the only source of light in my dark room the sliver of a crescent moon peering in through my windows, I felt a sense of impending dread.
I'd managed to put it off for a day, but I couldn't run from the problem forever. That meant that tomorrow, I'd have to deal with the issues. What exactly those issues were and what exactly I could do to combat those issues, however, I wasn't entirely certain of.
There was no doubt in my mind that I'd have to face Hiratsuka-sensei eventually. She was my girlfriend after all. But even just thinking about that task seemed daunting beyond all belief.
…What could I say to her after witnessing what I did? Her twisted visage as she'd snarled and snapped at Yukinoshita over what had quickly devolved into a verbal showdown, and the venom dripping from her lips as she attacked the other girl so ruthlessly, so personally and mercilessly.
I briefly supposed that I could simply pretend that nothing had happened; after all, it wasn't like she'd seen me or anything. Yukinoshita had at the very end, but I doubt that after a confrontation like that that she would be anywhere close to on speaking terms with Hiratsuka-sensei. She'd probably keep her lips sealed, which meant that if I really wanted to, I could try to just go on as if everything was peachy keen and fine as a fire flower.
But... it wasn't. And I wasn't that good of an actor either. Hiratsuka-sensei was right when she'd said she could read me like a book. If I tried to hide anything from her, she'd quickly notice my uneasiness and would hound me until she managed to pry an answer from my unwilling lips. That only left me one option: confront her and try to pry the answers out of her before she could turn it back around on me. As much as I wanted those answers though, I wasn't looking forward to another heated conversation turned argument between us.
Especially not after seeing what she was capable of the other day.
That being said, there was another thing to consider of course. Another person.
Yukinoshita definitely hadn't gotten out of that battle royale without sustaining her own injuries. Sure, she'd thrown out some retorts and snide remarks herself, but if that sad smile in the hall was anything to go by, Hiratsuka-sensei's words seemed to have gotten to her as well. And as well they should have. They weren't particularly nice ones.
I didn't know what I was going to do about her though. She had seen me eavesdropping out in the hallway, so she had probably guessed and guessed correctly that I had been listening in on their entire conversation. Did that I mean that I should go confront her and apologize on Hiratsuka-sensei's behalf? Or would it be more appropriate if I simply tried to ignore her for the next few weeks and hoped things would settle themselves?
I already knew the answer to that question. I'd have to confront her and offer some crappy half-hearted apologies for being the cause of all that drama, and maybe try to mend things somehow without giving anything away.
I sat on the edge of the bed for a while, simply mulling over how I would approach these sensitive topics when the time came. I remained there for a while, my brain churning out hundreds of different scenarios, and though they were all different in one way or another, they all unfailingly ended in the same way – with someone getting hurt.
When a fair amount of time and silent introspection had passed, I found my eyes growing tired once more. Despite the seemingly absurd amounts of sleep I had gotten in the past two days, I still felt incredibly drained and exhausted, my energy seeming only to last me as long as it took to wake up before ebbing out again.
With a furling of covers, I let my body sink into my plush bed. I knew I would have to deal with those issues eventually, but as I lay there, I just couldn't bring myself to care.
They would have to wait until I woke up.
'Hikigaya. This really isnt funny anymore. Where the hell have you been?'
With a click, I sent my phone into sleep mode. That message had been sent yesterday night some time around nine o'clock. It was one of the many that Hiratsuka-sensei had sent me after not having heard from me in a few days.
Today was the day. I figured I could only avoid her for so long, so today I was choosing to go back to school where a run-in with her would be inevitable.
In a way, I was sort of relieved that I would see her there at school. At least there, we wouldn't be forced to discuss anything too important considering all the prying ears of the students around us. The main issue would have to wait until we got back to her apartment or made it somewhere more private. That thought gave me some relief, but not much.
Slipping my phone into my pocket, I walked through the hallway of Sobu's second level and straight into the classroom of 2F. I saw Hiratsuka-sensei grading some papers at her desk, but I kept my eyes forward and my gaze off her.
When I reached my seat, I sat down to the sight of two piercing grey eyes boring into me from the front. She was staring at me from her desk, one hand grasping a pen, and the other already wrapping up lightly into a fist. Unsurprisingly, she looked pretty upset.
I did my best to ignore that heated glance, and instead focused on a book that I'd pulled out from my bag. After a few moments, I noticed that her gaze had finally turned away and I unconsciously let out a sigh of relief.
She stood and with a few brusque words on her behalf, class began.
I tried my best to keep my eyes fixed on my lap, but it appeared that Hiratsuka-sensei planned on doing the exact opposite. Throughout the class's duration, I felt her gaze shift to me on multiple occasions, her eyes gleaming cold with contempt each and every time.
Her harsh voice called on me more than once, but luckily for me, the novel we were covering was one that I'd read and analyzed in my free time, so I was able to answer her questions without faltering. She didn't seem too pleased with this, and instead of complimenting me for my participation and knowledge, she merely grunted when I muttered the correct answers.
In a way, she was right to be angry with me. For all she knew, I'd willingly ditched her that day after I'd gone to club and every day subsequently without giving her any prior notice or good excuse. With the knowledge she possessed, it really did seem like I was the one in the wrong here. However, we both knew inside that that wasn't strictly true.
When class ended and everyone began filtering out of the room, I heard a distinct, feminine voice call out to me.
"Hikigaya. Come over here please."
My hand paused on my bag, but I gave a curt nod. Sighing out tepidly through my nostrils, I made my way over to her desk, stopping a few paces in front of it when I got close enough. I kept my expression neutral, and didn't offer anything to start, expecting instead for her to start the conversation. I wanted to see what she'd have to say, after all.
"Where the hell have you been?" she growled quietly, making sure to punctuate each syllable with an unmistakable note of aggression.
There were still a few students left in the class, idly chatting while sitting on the desks, so she kept her voice low.
Any guilt that I might've held from earlier seemed to evaporate as I looked at her slightly twisted features. They reminded me of her snarling visage from a few days earlier.
"Nowhere…" I deflected unconvincingly.
Her eyes narrowed. "Nowhere? Are you kidding? After ignoring me for the better part of a week, that's what you have to say to me?"
I contemplated offering her a halfhearted shrug, but even I thought that was a little too cruel. With my mixed feelings churning away inside of me, I found it difficult to properly respond to her question.
"You're being kind of loud."
She blinked as she realized that one or two of the students that were still in the room had thrown curious glances towards the front. She leaned backwards a little bit and idly brushed at some loose dust that sat on her coat. "Oh, we're going to talk about this later. Don't think for a second that we're done here."
"Yeah. I know," I answered.
She regarded me for a second, her eyes seeming to search my features for the tiniest hint of guilt, before relaxing ever so slightly. "My apartment. 4 o'clock." Her voice had quieted to a hard whisper. I could still hear the edges in it, but volume-wise, it was low enough not to be heard. "And so help me God if you skip out again…"
I think I should have been nervous upon hearing that she wanted to have a one-on-one discussion with me, but I guess because I figured it was only a matter of time until she asked about something like this, I was able to offer a simple affirmation.
"…Alright. I'll see you then."
She looked at me with that same hard expression again, and then gave a stiff nod.
With the conclusion of our conversation, I grabbed my bag and left the classroom.