She ignored their celebration, heading to the kitchen to get something to drink. If she didn't get something in her stomach soon, she feared she would end up passing away again. Grabbing water from the kettle, she placed it in her cup and downed it quickly, almost choking in the process.
"Yaoyao, yaoyao, come here," her mother, Zhang Hui, called her over. "Did your father tell you? Your brother doesn't have to go to the countryside."
Just like her father, her mother was all smiles. Unlike her father, she did not even ask if she was alright. Her pale face and weak limbs did not evoke the maternal instinct it used to.
For the first time, all day, she barely managed to rasp out, "What job did he find?"
"The steel mill. He starts working in the steel mill a week from now," her mother responded.
Her half-lidded eyes flashed towards her brother, who was sitting at the table, eating coarse grain. Her two other younger siblings, Lin Tian, her younger brother, and Lin Yue, her younger sister, also had their bowls.
Everyone had a bowl except her. And when she went to the kitchen, she did not see any food in the pot.
"Okay," she answered flatly. "Mother, where's my dinner?"
Her question cracked her mother's smile. She watched her mother scan the table, at everyone eating. Then at her daughter with a pale face. She opened her mouth, then closed it.
"Yaoyao," her father called, using his hand to wave her over. "We have good news for you, too."
"Do I have a job too?" she asked quizically, pretending not to know that the supposed good news was her marriage.
It might have been good news for the her of a previous life. But for her now, it was a death sentence. As soon as her father suggests the marriage, she would decline.
An awkward silence fell between her parents. At nineteen, she could indeed get a job. The problem is, no one thought of getting her a job at all.
"It's better than a job," her mother chimed. "We've found you a great match. You'll get married the day before your brother starts working."
Yaoyao laughed, a wheezing laugh. Her throat tightened, her chest hurt, but she laughed. She couldn't stop herself. She convinced herself that this was a dream. That King Yama was giving her a chance to say no. So she did.
Through rasping sounds, she said, "No. I'm not getting married." She looked between her parents. "I am not getting married." This time her voice held conviction.
Her parents' mouths were wide. They did not expect her to say no.
Recovering quickly, her mother said, "We haven't even told you who you're marrying. His father is the director of the steel mill. There are so many women trampling their threshold; it shouldn't be our turn, but Li Jun took a fancy to you. This is good for your family."
With more conviction than she had shown in the past few years, she straightened herself. She stepped back. Glancing at every person in the room, she spoke clearly.
"I refuse to get married. I, Lin Xiuyao, refuse to marry Li Jun in this life!" Her voice echoed in the house. Her elder brother finally stopped eating.
He scoffed, "Our parents have already decided. You don't have a say. I can only get my job if you marry him."
"So you traded your daughter for a job?" A small chuckle left her lips.
Her heart pinched. Her hand flew to her chest.
Lin Zheng shot up from his chair, slamming his hands on the table. "What trade? I earned this job. It's just getting married. You'd have to do it one day anyway. Are you planning to be an old maid?"
"Old maid?" she scoffed. "You all were the ones who didn't want me to get married. Now, all of a sudden, there's this good thing."
Yes. It was they who refused to let her marry. She had someone she liked once. A childhood friend, from when days were happier. They lost contact more than three years ago.
At that time, she was the pampered little miss of her family. Then the world turned. Their family was lucky enough not to be taken to a labour camp. Only because they gave up all of their fortune at the right time.
"Why did he choose me?" she asked, her voice flat. "He could have his pick of any woman, so why me?"
This is a question she never asked in her past life. She was so happy to be chosen, she never thought of the reason. She was not close to Li Jun or his family; no one in their family was close to them. As she thought about it, she found the matter strange.
But who would give her an answer? Judging from the faces of her family, they were more clueless than she was.
"Who cares what the reason is? You should be grateful that someone like him is willing to look at someone like you," Lin Zheng retorted.
"Someone like me?" she asked. "Think carefully before you answer that. We have the same parents."
That stopped him. Lin Xiuyao coughed, her throat feeling scratchy.
"Yaoyao, you aren't feeling well. Go to bed, we'll talk about your wedding tomorrow," her father dismissed her.
She had already started walking when her father told her to go to bed. But hearing the last part of his sentence, she stopped in her tracks. A nameless anger rose inside her.
Perhaps because she had spent so many years with Li Jun, she found herself becoming less sensitive to people's emotions. She did not help without benefit. She learned when to cry. When to be quiet. She no longer pitied the weak. Sometimes she felt that she deserved what happened to her.
There were even times when Li Jun would torture her, and she enjoyed it.
But that did not mean she intended to jump into the fire pit again. She was no longer the weak person she had been when she married Li Jun. She was no longer the doormat for her parents and siblings to walk on. She survived that bastard, and she had no intention of doing it again.
She didn't hold back; she didn't stop the anger rising inside her. She felt the need to do something, so she did it. She remembered every time she would get hit. She remembered the scars; she remembered which places hurt the most.
She walked towards her father, clenched her fist, pulled her hand back, then her hand surged forward, hitting him in the right side of his abdomen. She watched her father double over and fall to the floor.
She rolled her shoulders and sighed. She had vented her anger. She felt extremely happy, seeing everyone's astonished faces. She felt even better watching her father curled up on the ground.
Ignoring them all, she walked to the room. She did not get far, however, before her lack of food and sickness caught up with her, and she crumpled to the floor.
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A/N: Thanks much for reading. It means a lot.
Do you want to punch them too?