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Chapter 4 - Chapter 4: I Want to Live

The sky was overcast. Cold gusts of wind swept through the air, carrying with them a heavy, faintly metallic stench that pressed down on the heart.

"Looks like it's going to rain today."

"Yeah. Maybe we should end outdoor time early. I don't feel like getting soaked."

"Mm. Agreed."

As they spoke, one soldier pulled a whistle from his pocket and blew it. The sharp, piercing sound echoed across the square.

Upon hearing the whistle, the Eldians didn't need to be ordered. They obediently began heading back.

What no one noticed—

Was that in a corner of the barbed-wire fence, Lillian's small figure was crouched among the weeds, tugging at the wire to reveal a small opening.

This hole was impossible for adults to squeeze through. In fact, even for Lillian it was extremely difficult. That was precisely why it had gone unnoticed—if it were large enough for adults, it would have been discovered long ago.

He carefully braced the wire with his hands, doing his best to widen the opening before squeezing through. He had no intention of letting the rust-covered wire tear his skin open—getting killed by tetanus instead of a Marleyan soldier would be a truly ridiculous way to die.

After half a minute of struggle, he finally wriggled through the fence.

Then he immediately sprinted toward the nearby buildings.

Outside the fence was a labyrinth of intersecting paths. Even if an Eldian made it out, they wouldn't know the routes. Running around blindly like a headless fly would only guarantee capture.

But Lillian had experience from last time.

He knew which path was correct.

He quickly ran to the end of a narrow path on the left, slipped behind a building, and cautiously peeked out.

In front of the building stretched an open area. Several Marleyan soldiers were walking about.

And beyond that open space—stood the massive iron gate.

At this very moment, it was open.

Last time, Lillian had acted without any restraint and simply sprinted straight out. Although he had made it past the main gate, he was quickly discovered by the soldiers. Once that happened, running was pointless—after all, they had vehicles. No matter how fast you ran on two legs, you couldn't outrun a car.

So this time, he had to find a way to escape without being discovered.

Thinking this over, Lillian lifted his head. The building in front of him was the Marleyan soldiers' rest quarters. He pressed his ear to the wall and listened carefully.

No sound.

After hesitating briefly, he finally made up his mind.

He glanced at the window less than two meters above the ground, took a few steps back, then charged forward and leapt. His hands caught the windowsill, and with every ounce of strength he had, he hauled himself up and climbed inside.

Thud!

The sound of landing was a little loud—but fortunately, no one was in the room.

He looked around. This was a second-floor room. Since it was only a rest area for ordinary soldiers, there was nothing of value inside—just a single bed and a table.

He pulled open the drawers of the cabinet. Inside were paper and pens, nothing more important.

Turning around, he left the room and headed straight for the stairs leading down to the first floor. As he descended and lifted his eyes—

—he saw a Marleyan military uniform hanging on a coat rack beside the door.

Perfect! If he could use that as a disguise—

He quickened his pace and walked over. Just as his hand touched the collar of the uniform, a voice suddenly sounded from behind him.

"Who are you?"

In that instant, goosebumps exploded across Lillian's entire body. A moment later came despair. He stiffly turned around—and froze.

On the single bed opposite him sat a small boy, rubbing his sleepy eyes and yawning, clearly just awakened.

No wonder there had been no sound earlier.

He'd been asleep…

Lillian's thoughts raced.

At first, he'd assumed there was a Marleyan soldier inside—and that everything was over. But a child?

That was manageable.

"I'm… a soldier here." Lillian forced a smile, trying to keep his voice calm and natural.

"A soldier?" The boy frowned. He looked a little older than Lillian—around fourteen or fifteen.

"Are there soldiers that small? And why were you trying to take my dad's uniform?!"

"Uh—well, your father asked me to help get it for him. He—"

"You're not a soldier! You're a devil!!"

The boy suddenly screamed, jumping up from the bed and pointing at Lillian's black cloth clothing.

"All the devils locked up in there wear this kind of outfit!!"

Fuck! How did I forget that?!

Lillian's expression instantly darkened.

It was true—the Eldians in the internment camp all wore identical black burlap clothing. The soldiers could tell at a glance.

Whoosh!

Lillian lunged forward in a burst of speed.

He'd already been exposed—there was nothing left to say. He had to control this boy first!

"Damn devil!"

The boy screamed, yanking open the drawer of the nearby table and pulling out a handgun!

Thump—thump!

The instant Lillian saw the gun, his heart plunged.

It's over!

"Die, you devil!!"

Hatred twisted the boy's face as he shouted, aiming the gun straight at Lillian, who was charging toward him. Without the slightest hesitation, he pulled the trigger.

The next second, a crisp click-click sound echoed.

The boy froze.

And at that moment, with death staring him in the face, Lillian's ferocity erupted. He had already drawn a dagger while rushing forward. He slammed the boy down onto the bed and drove the blade straight into his chest!

Pshk! Pshk! Pshk! Pshk!

He stabbed again and again.

The boy let out a piercing scream of pain before Lillian clamped a hand over his mouth. The remaining sounds were muffled groans—then, as his pupils dilated, there was no sound at all.

Clang!

The dagger fell to the floor.

The savage light faded from Lillian's eyes. Staring at his hands, drenched in blood, he suddenly dropped to his knees and retched violently.

This was the first time he had ever killed someone.

But there was no choice. If he hadn't done it, he would have died.

There was no other way. Only this way.

He glanced at the boy's body. His eyes were still wide open.

Forcing strength back into his trembling legs, Lillian stood up and took the handgun from the boy's hand.

Looking it over carefully—even though he didn't really understand firearms—he realized the reason the gun hadn't fired was because the safety was still on. That was why, when the boy pulled the trigger, the bullet never left the chamber to tear through Lillian's body.

"If you'd known to turn off the safety before firing…"

Lillian murmured as he looked at the boy's face, "…then the one lying on the floor right now would be me, wouldn't it?"

"And you would've been rewarded for shooting an escaping Eldian—praised as some kind of young hero… right?"

His expression hardened.

Those who intend to kill must also be prepared to be killed.

So in the end, this was the boy's own doing.

If the boy hadn't resisted so fiercely, Lillian wouldn't have gone so far as to kill him. Of course, Lillian had no intention of justifying his actions, nor did he want to comfort himself with lofty excuses.

It was simply a matter of opposing positions.

And if he absolutely had to give a reason, there was only one:

"I want… to live."

He said it softly but firmly.

Gripping the handgun tightly, he picked up a set of clothes from the wooden chair beside the bed—it was the boy's uniform. Clearly, it fit Lillian far better than the adult uniform hanging by the door.

He put it on. It was only slightly too large.

After wiping the blood from his hands, he tucked the handgun into his pocket, took a deep breath, walked to the door, and opened it.

Creeeak—

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