This was a question that had been quietly bubbling up in Lucas' subconscious over the past few days, one that he had intentionally or unintentionally been trying to avoid confronting.
With a whole new set of memories, a literal lifetime worth of experiences being shoved into his head without him knowing how, was Lucas still himself, or was he someone else entirely?
Truthfully, Lucas knew he was a bit different from before, but he hadn't really considered that a bad thing. He still loved his mother and father just the same, if not even more, he still saw Eris as his big sister, and his Uncle Newton and Aunt Sasha as family.
He still liked the same things he liked before, and didn't like the things he hadn't liked, so there really wasn't much of a change, but now that he was opening up about it for the first time, and seeing the concerned looks on his parents' faces, anxiety erupted inside of him.
If Lucas thought of himself as different or changed in some way, what about his parents? Would they also think of him differently?
They had just promised to love and support him, but what would happen if they no longer saw him as their son?
Would they avoid and isolate him?
Would he be cast out and abandoned?
All these fears began rising to the surface and threatened to consume the young boy.
As his breathing quickened, Lucas felt light-headed and his vision began to spin.
He wanted to say something, but his mouth went dry and his throat clenched up before he could speak.
Terrified to meet the eyes of his mother and father, Lucas lowered his head and stumbled backwards, falling to the floor as he clutched his head and curled up into a ball, instinctively trying to protect himself.
"…cas..."
"…UCAS..."
"LUCAS!!"
Suddenly, a great shout ripped Lucas out of the spiralling maelstrom his mind had sunk him into, and before he knew it, two pairs of arms were wrapped tightly around him, pulling him into a warm embrace that slowly began to sooth his fraying nerves.
It took quite some time before the young boy managed to regain some semblance of calm, but when he eventually did, he slowly lifted his eyes and opened his ears, only then realizing that both his parents were hugging him, stroking his back, and whispering comforting words to him.
"It's alright. It's alright, Son, everything is going to be fine… no, everything is fine, don't worry, we're here for you…"
Anna and Drake were both feeling an incredible sense of guilt in their hearts at that moment.
They had just promised their son that they would stand by him and protect him no matter what problems he faced, yet as soon as he gathered his courage and told them what was troubling him, they had lost themselves in confusion and concern.
It wasn't exactly fair to judge them for this, as it was only reasonable to be worried upon hearing Lucas say he inherited a whole other person's memories and experiences; however, when they saw the look of abject terror and fear Lucas had on his face when he met their questioning gazes, they knew they had committed a grave mistake.
Over the past 10 days, Drake and Anna had been closely observing Lucas, and although they were surprised at times by his newfound knowledge and more mature attitude, never once did they have any doubt that he was their one and only child.
One might argue that they were only acting that way because they didn't have all the facts, but if you could only trust another if you knew everything about them, and only love another if there was a logical reason to, you would never trust or love anyone.
Being a family was about more than just sharing the same blood, it was about sharing a bond of faith that could withstand any wind or storm.
Was their son a little different now?
Definitely.
Was he still their son though?
In that moment, where they saw the frightened little boy on the verge of a nervous breakdown, Anna and Drake firmly believed he was; not because he offered them some kind of proof, but because he was, plain and simple.
They had never doubted Lucas, they were simply worried about him, but showing that worry and hesitation on their faces while their son was grappling with an existential crisis was the last thing they should have done.
What Lucas needed from them in this moment more than anything else was support, after all, the one who was most in conflict right now was Lucas himself, yet they had almost failed to give that to him.
Lucas thinking his parents had doubts about him was only natural as he was having doubts about himself, which was also why it was an incredible comfort when he felt Anna and Drake embrace him and heard their heartfelt words.
While it didn't completely alleviate his fears, it did allow him to calm down a bit.
It was only a long while later that the family of three separated, though the two adults didn't entirely let go of their son, like they were afraid he would disappear if they did. Looking up at his parents, Lucas still saw worry in their expressions, but he now knew it wasn't about who, or what, he was, but simply about him, their son.
Apologizing didn't seem to be the right thing to do in this situation, and offering thanks also didn't quite fit, so after looking inside of himself and reflecting on the what had nearly become an irreversible trauma, Lucas quietly spoke the first words that came to mind, "I love you, Mom, Dad."
Choking back their tears, some part of which was a result of happiness, and another part shame, Anna and Drake simply replied, "En, we love you too, Lucas."
…..
"So, you don't remember going to Little Eris' birthday two months ago at all?" Anna asked Lucas.
After the family of three finally calmed down enough to hold a proper conversation, Anna and Drake's first priority was to try to figure out just how much of their son's memory had gone missing.
As of right now, they were working on the theory that during the accident in the woods, Lucas had been struck by the remnant Soul of some very powerful Cultivator, which had damaged his own Soul.
Was such a thing even possible?
They honestly had no idea.
The two of them thought about asking Sasha, as she might know something more, but they were hesitating. They had known Sasha and Charles for almost 20 years now, and they could be considered as close as family, but Lucas' situation was delicate, so they decided to proceed cautiously for now.
What's more, if everything in Lucas' mind was as astonishing as the Body Tempering Art he casually pulled out, learning about this situation might put Sasha and Charles in danger.
Anna and Drake were certain their best friends wouldn't care about such trouble, but they still wanted to take some time to consider their options before saying anything.
For now, the mother and father duo decided they should learn as much as they could on their own before determining if they needed to ask for help from others.
"Not entirely… I remember helping Dad make Big Sister Eris a new sword as a gift, but I don't remember giving it to her, even though I recall coming home that night," Lucas frowned as he did his best to explain one of the gaps in his memory he had been able to identify.
For the most part, he couldn't tell if he didn't remember certain things because of the accident, or because he had simply forgotten about them.
If he was asked what he ate for breakfast a month ago, he naturally wouldn't be able to recall and thus didn't care about it; however, forgetting important events or details from his life was a disturbing possibility.
Fortunately, after reviewing several important occurrences from the past year or so, Lucas, Anna, and Drake concluded that while there was definitely some memory loss on the boy's part, it was relatively minor and shouldn't inconvenience him much, especially when it came to things like daily habits or learned knowledge.
For instance, Lucas had forgotten about one of the sword lessons his mother had given him 3 weeks ago which should have been quite memorable as he scraped his elbow quite badly during a fall.
The pain alone should have made it impossible to forget that day, but just because he didn't remember that lesson, it didn't mean he forgot the sword arts he had been training as he had practiced those motions multiple times over the course of many months.
Knowledge of that specific incident seemed to have disappeared, but that didn't affect his life as his other experiences filled in the gaps.
Ultimately, it seemed his memory loss was a relatively minor issue; the bigger problem was the 'new' memories Lucas had obtained.
Right now, the clearest memory Lucas was able to recall was the Martial Art he had taught his mother and father, and through learning and practicing these exercises over the past 10 days, Anna and Drake could tell it was extremely valuable.
Should others come to learn that Lucas had 'inherited' this Body Tempering Art, they would certainly covet it, and may even wonder what other valuable knowledge he might posses.
The safest thing to do would be to bury any knowledge of this Art and never speak of it again; however, doing so would be an incredible waste.
The knowledge Lucas now possessed was too temping to just ignore, so the question became how to go about using it without drawing unwanted attention.
"Lucas, for now, don't tell anyone else about these new 'memories' you've gained, okay?" Drake warned his son solemnly.
The young boy nodded immediately, understanding that this wasn't something he should go around sharing carelessly.
Remembering something, though, Lucas hesitantly asked, "What about Big Sister Eris and Aunty Sasha? I already showed them part of it, and Mom said she would allow me to teach Big Sister after she checked if it was safe…"
Anna also felt a slight headache when her son brought up this point, as both Eris and Sasha had been pestering her about this very issue recently.
Eris was her student, and as her Teacher, Anna certainly wanted the best for her, which at the moment meant teaching her this Body Tempering Art as practicing would certainly be better than not.
Still, it wouldn't be too hard to convince Eris the exercises weren't suitable for her and brush the whole incident aside.
How to handle Sasha, however, was a whole other issue.
Unlike with her somewhat naïve student, Anna knew there would be no fooling her best friend. Sasha had already seen some of the Martial Art and could certainly recognize not only its utility, but also its value.
There was no way to simply get her to forget about it.
Anna could probably rely on her friendship with Sasha to get her to stop asking about it, but that would only create a gap between them, especially if Anna ever wanted to use that Body Tempering Art for her own training in the future, which she very much did.
Glancing over at her son, who was sitting across the dining table from her, Anna decided to ask the source himself, "Lucas, what would you like to do?"
Asking for the opinion of a child regarding such a sensitive matter might seem silly, but Anna at least wanted to hear her son's opinion before making further plans.
Drake also turned to pay attention to his son, not objecting to his wife asking for the latter's thoughts.
Furrowing his brow for a moment, Lucas thought hard about many things before replying, "I don't want to lie to Big Sister Eris, but if Mother and Father think I shouldn't teach her, I won't."
"But what about you, Son? Do you want to use that Martial Art in the future?" Drake followed up, a little amused that his son was thinking so hard about a girl at such a young age, but also a little proud that he was acting responsibly and was willing to listen to them.
"I… I do want to use it. Practicing it feels natural, while not doing at least some of those exercises every day makes me feel uncomfortable for some reason," Lucas hesitantly said, sinking into his thoughts for a moment before commented, "I also don't know what else I might remember in the future, so I don't want to just discard this new knowledge without exploring it first."
Anna exchanged a glance with her husband before sighing and saying to her son, "Give your father and I some time to think about this."
Lucas wanted to say something to support himself, but ultimately just nodded and lowered his head.
He didn't think it would be such a big deal to teach his big sister, nor did he think it was necessarily a bad thing to use the new memories he had obtained if they were useful to him, but he also didn't want to trouble his parents any further than he already had, so he decided to be patient for now.
Besides, he had only turned 9-years-old a few days ago; it wasn't like he was in some terrible rush.