After he left…
I couldn't move.
My body slid down slowly until I was sitting on the cold floor, my back against the wall.
I forgot how to breathe.
My chest felt tight, like something was stuck there — not pain, not fear — just… too much.
He touched my face.
The thought came suddenly, clearly.
His hand had been warm. Big. Gentle, even though everything happened so fast.
And his voice…
Please. Just a minute.
It stayed in my ears, low and hurried, like an echo that refused to fade.
Then I caught my reflection in the small window of the door.
My face was burning red, almost unrecognizable—like it didn't belong to me anymore.
I lifted my hand and touched my cheek, still warm, still trembling.
In that quiet second, one thought settled heavy in my chest,
In that quiet moment, I knew it…
I had completely lost myself this time
My heart was beating too fast, like it was running somewhere without telling me.
I had talked to him.
The boy from the bus.
The boy I thought only existed in my thoughts.
And yet… he didn't even know it was me.
That thought hurt a little.
But somehow… it didn't ruin the moment.
Everything felt unreal, like a dream I was scared to wake up from.
I didn't even remember why I had stood up in the first place.
Water.
Yes… I was going to get water.
I laughed softly at myself, covering my face.
What just happened to me?
When I finally reached home that night, the world felt unusually quiet.
The full moon hung high in the sky, pouring its silver light everywhere, making the darkness feel gentle instead of lonely.
The sky looked brighter than usual—almost as if the moon itself wanted to be noticed.
She had always adored little things like this.
She paused, looking up, heart full, thinking about how beautiful the moon was… and how beauty feels incomplete when it isn't shared.
In that moment, she wished someone dear was beside her—
someone to stand with under that glowing sky,
someone to share the silence, the light, and the feeling the moon quietly stirred in her heart.And she silently wish it was him…
At least we look at the same moon…
Lily wrote everything down.
Every word.
Every second.
My diary pages felt too small for my thoughts.
"He stood so close," I whispered to Max as he lay beside me, his head resting on my knee.
"I think my heart almost stopped."
Max tilted his head, ears perking up, eyes full of curiosity.
"I talked to him," I said again, smiling so hard my cheeks hurt.
"He talked to me."
Max wagged his tail slowly, like he understood.
I hugged his neck, burying my face in his fur.
"I think something changed today," I told him quietly.
---
The next morning, the sky slowly brightened, shades of gold and pale blue melting into each other as the night quietly slipped away.
Birds fluttered from branch to branch, carrying food for their little ones, their soft calls filling the air with life.
The world felt new again.
Before I could even step outside, Max came running toward me, tail wagging wildly, eyes full of joy—my sweetest morning greeting.
And I woke up with the same thought. Same hope.
Will I see him again?
My heart felt lighter. Nervous. Hopeful.
But life, as always, had its own timing.
The new art lecturer hall was bigger than I expected.
Bright. Spacious. Filled with voices.
I chose a seat near the side, close to the window — because I liked windows, because they made me feel less seen.
That's when I noticed This girl .
She stood out without trying.
Tall.
Confident posture.
Long blonde hair that caught the light when she moved.
Her eyes were green — not the soft kind, but bright, alive, like she belonged anywhere she stood.
People looked at her naturally.Boys laughed louder near her.
Girls whispered, watched.
She smiled easily, like the world never made her doubt herself.
She's… beautiful, I thought honestly.
In a quiet admiration kind of way.
I wondered what it felt like to be like that.
Without realizing it, I kept looking.
Then she turned.
Oh no.
I looked down immediately, my heart dropping.
Why did I look so long?
I focused on my sketchbook, pretending the lines on the page were suddenly very important.
Footsteps came closer.
I froze.
A shadow fell across my table.
"Hi."
The voice was cheerful. Warm.
I swallowed.
"Hi…" I answered softly, not looking up.
"What's your name?" she asked.
"L-Lily Winslow" I said, my voice barely there.
"Lily," she repeated. "That's pretty"
I felt my ears burn.
She leaned slightly, peeking at my sketchbook.
"Wait—were you staring at me earlier?" she asked playfully.
"Am I that beautiful?"
My brain shut down.
"I— I mean— yes," I blurted out without thinking.
The moment the words left my mouth, I wanted to disappear.
Her laughter filled the space between us — bright, real, not mocking.
"You're honest," she said, grinning. "I like that."
She looked again at my drawing.Her smile softened.
"…Wow," she said quietly. "You drew this?"
I nodded.
"It's really beautiful," she said sincerely. "So clean..."
No one had said that to me before.
Not like that.
"I'm Mira Laurent. You can call me Mira" she said, pulling a chair and sitting beside me like it was the most natural thing in the world.
Just like that.
She didn't hesitate.Didn't look around.Didn't act like sitting next to me was a favor.
She just stayed.
And for the first time since university began…
I didn't feel invisible …because of her.
---
Lily paused while telling the story.
Lia smiled softly.
"That's how you meet her? So she's your first friend" she asked.
Lily nodded.
"That's how my world slowly began to feel… less lonely."
Mira didn't walk away after that first conversation.
She stayed.
Not standing too close.
Not rushing Lily with questions.
Just… staying.
That alone made Lily nervous.
Because people usually didn't stay.
Mira leaned against the desk beside Lily, resting her chin on her palm as if it was the most natural thing in the world.
"So," she said lightly, eyes sparkling,
"you draw like this every day?"
Lily's fingers tightened around her pencil.
Every day.
Alone.
Quietly.
"I—um… only when I have time," Lily replied softly, her voice barely louder than the scratch of graphite on paper.
Mira peeked closer at the sketchbook.
The lines were careful.
Patient.
As if Lily was afraid of making mistakes — but still brave enough to try.
Mira smiled.
"You're really good," she said, genuinely impressed.
"Like… really good."
Lily froze.
Her brain immediately panicked.
She's just being nice.
She says this to everyone.
Don't take it seriously.
"Oh—no," Lily said quickly, shaking her head.
"It's just practice."
Mira tilted her head.
"That's what talented people always say."
Before Lily could react, Mira suddenly leaned in and gently squeezed Lily's cheeks between her fingers.
"Oh my god," Mira laughed, delighted.
"Look at your face. You're turning red."
Lily's world stopped.
Her cheeks felt warm.
Then hotter.
Then on fire.
She blinked, completely frozen.
This is too close.
Too sudden.
Too familiar.
Her heart started racing — in a scared way.
Mira pulled back immediately.
"Oh—sorry!" she said quickly, hands up.
"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable."
Lily shook her head fast.
"No—no, it's okay," she whispered, forcing a small smile.
"I'm just… not used to this."
Mira noticed.
Not the smile.But the way Lily's shoulders stayed tense.The way her eyes avoided contact.The way she subtly leaned back, creating distance.
Like someone who had learned that closeness never lasted.
But From that day on, Mira didn't change.
She still talked a lot.
Still laughed loudly — the kind of laugh that turned heads.
Still teased Lily gently, like it was her favorite habit.
"Why do you erase the same line five times?" Mira asked one day, peeking over Lily's shoulder.
"It was already perfect the first time."
Lily blinked.
"I—because… what if it's wrong?"
Mira gasped dramatically.
"Wrong? Lily, if this is wrong, then I should quit art forever."
Lily let out a small laugh before she could stop herself.
Mira froze.
"…Did you just laugh?" she asked, eyes wide.
Lily panicked.
"I—sorry—"
But Mira was already smiling.
"Oh my god," she said softly, leaning closer.
"You have a little dimple."
Lily covered her cheek instantly.
"I do not."
"You do," Mira insisted.
"And it's unfair."
That day, Lily laughed again — properly this time.So hard that her shoulders shook.So freely that she forgot to hide.
Her dimple appeared clearly, like it had been waiting.Mira smiled at that moment like she had won something precious.
But Mira was careful.
She stopped touching Lily without warning.Stopped pulling her into attention.Stopped dragging her into crowds.
Instead, she matched Lily's pace.
She sat beside her during lectures, whispering jokes only Lily could hear.Waited for her after class, pretending it was no big deal.Walked slowly, even when her long legs could've gone ahead.
And Lily noticed.
She just didn't understand it.
Why is she still here?
Why hasn't she gotten bored yet?
She kept telling herself.
She's like this with everyone.She'll leave soon.Don't get attached.
Because she had been here before.
Girls who laughed with her at first.Who called her cute.Who made her feel included — until they didn't.Until whispers replaced smiles.Until kindness grew sharp.
So Lily kept her heart folded inward.
She talked — but not too much.
She smiled — but not too wide.
She let Mira in…
just not all the way.
Mira, on the other hand, noticed everything.
She noticed how Lily always sat alone before she arrived.How Lily flinched when voices grew loud.How she held her sketchbook like a shield.
One afternoon, while Lily erased the same line for the third time, Mira sighed and said lightly,
"You know… if you erase it again, I'm stealing your eraser."
Lily paused.
"…You wouldn't."
Mira grinned.
"Try me."
Then, softer — without teasing —
"You don't have to disappear like that."
Lily's hand stilled.
"I don't disappear," she said quietly.
Mira smiled — her smile gentle and Honest.
"I know," she said.
"But sometimes it feels like you're afraid someone might make you disappear."
Lily didn't answer.
Her throat felt tight.
Mira didn't push.Didn't ask questions.Didn't demand answers.
She just stayed.
Talking.
Laughing.
Walking beside her.
And for the first time in a long time…
Lily wondered what it would be like to have a friend who didn't change.
Someone who didn't leave.
End of chapter 5