Chapter Four
Ugh...
A throbbing pain made me snap my eyes open as the broken, familiar room greeted me. My lungs felt like they had been marinated in swamp water, and my legs were screaming in a language only known to the severely out-of-shape.
"Urgh… my gold… where is the gold…" I croaked, my voice sounding like two dry stones grinding together.
[PING!]
[The Host has finally decided to rejoin the land of the living!]
[Current Time: 9:14 AM]
[Warning: You are approximately three hours behind schedule for a 'Productive Capitalist'!]
"Nine? Nine o'clock?!" I bolted upright, or at least I attempted to. My midsection had other plans, acting as a gravitational anchor that kept me pinned to the lumpy mattress. "The dawn! I told that ruby-eyed moron to bring the ledgers at dawn!"
"You did," a cool, dry voice drifted from the corner of the room.
I squinted to see who was the owner of the voice. And, not surprisingly enough, standing by the rickety table was Kaelen, holding a glass of water.
[PING!]
[Kaelen is judging your lack of discipline.]
[Likability: -45]
Oh right! The likability increased yesterday. I must see how to use gacha points later.
"Who told you to jog at 2:00 AM, Your Grace?" Kaelen sighed as he pressed the glass to my lips, pulling me out of my thoughts. I greedily drank, feeling the liquid soothe my parched throat.
"I don't like it," I croaked.
"Like what, Your Grace?"
"Being obese." I looked down at my stomach, which resembled a sack of flour that had given up on life. "It is a poor investment. High maintenance, low output, and zero resale value. This body is a liability I can no longer afford. I need to change, Kaelen."
Kaelen's ruby eyes flickered. For a second, I saw a spark of genuine surprise. "You've changed ever since you woke up, Your Grace. Are you sure you've not gone insane?"
"Don't people always change for better after having near death experiences?"
"I suppose?" Kaelen seems more friendly and less hostile, right now.
Maybe, I could try that. If the System said emotions were monetized, I needed to start making deposits into the Bank of Kaelen.
Isn't the best way to increase likability to compliment someone?
"And besides," I said, trying to force my face into what I thought was a charming expression. I reached out and patted his armored forearm. "I can't have my Head Knight looking better than me. Your face... it's like a diamond-encrusted gold bar. Truly, a masterpiece of market value. If your beauty was a taxed, our duchy would be flourishing."
Silence.
The air in the room didn't just turn cold; it turned absolute zero.
[PING!]
[Kaelen is questioning whether to call a exorcist or a priest.]
[Alert!]
[Likability: -55]
[Loyalty: 1 -> 0.5 (Warning: Near Mutiny!)]
Wait... didn't I just compliment him? What the hell happened!?
"Your Grace," Kaelen said, his voice as sharp as a guillotine. "If you me handsome ever again, I will forget my oath and run away. I don't want to become a gigolo to pay off the duchy's debt."
"Gigolo? Who said anything about—" I stopped myself, seeing the way Kaelen's hand gripped the hilt of his sword.
[Alert! Kaelen's Loyalty: 0.5 (Warning: Do Something!)]
"Fine! Forget the compliments!" I barked, waving a hand dismissively to hide my embarrassment. "Did you gather the ledgers?"
Kaelen exhaled a breath that was practically a puff of frost. "Yes, Your Grace. I stayed up and copied every word and compiled ledgers that are not stained with wine."
"What about the original ones?" I asked.
"The original wine-stained ones are also there beside the non-stained ones on your desk in the study room," Kaelen said shortly. "As for 'the debts' you owe. Most of them are from the local taverns, listing your unpaid tabs and merchants. The rest are demands from Baron Vische's personal debt collectors."
"So, the big chunk of debt comes from Baron Vische?"
"Yes, Your Grace."
"How much?"
"1 million gold, Your Grace. You preferred taking money from Baron Vische because you two were academy friends."
"I see. Do you think he scammed me, Kaelen?"
"It's not my place to say anything about Master's friend," Kaelen replied, his voice dripping with that familiar dry sarcasm. "After all, even if it's being scammed, it was a decision Your Grace made in sound mind."
"I see. Kaelen," I said, my voice dropping the frantic edge and becoming eerily calm. "You mentioned a merchant. The one whose vehicle I... wrecked?"
"Yes, Your Grace. Merchant Hans. He's been waiting at the gates every morning demanding compensation. You destroyed his wagon while—if I recall correctly—trying to blame the common people of the duchy not being able to pay more tax."
I winced. This body's previous owner was truly a 'human trash.'
"Prepare the carriage," I commanded.
"The carriage has no wheels, Your Grace," Kaelen reminded me. "You sold the iron rims for wine money last month to host Baron Vische."
Baron Vische. Baron Vische. Baron Vische. I must deal with him soon after I settle the matters of the duchy.
"Then we walk!" I struggled to my feet, my "liabilities" jiggling with every movement. "We are going to meet Merchant Hans. I am going to apologize."
Kaelen froze. "You... you're actually going to apologize? To a commoner? I thought Master was joking, yesterday. Isn't dignity the most important thing a noble owns, Your Grace?"
"An apology is free, Kaelen," I said, a predatory smirk tugging at my lips. "But the goodwill it generates? That can be leveraged. Nobles can't eat dignity for dinner now, can they? Now, get 'Diet Gilbert'—I mean, Butler Vizen—to find me a clean shirt. We have a deal to make."
"You aren't going to threaten him, right?" Kaelen asked, his ruby eyes narrowing.
"We'll see."
"Ah! Kaelen?" I called out as he turned to leave.
"Yes, Your Grace?"
"I'm promoting you," I said, patting my "liabilities" with a grimace. "From now on, you'll be my fitness trainer until I lose all this weight."
"Can I decline?"
"Haha. No."
"Ugh. Fine."
[PING!]
[Likability Points: -50]
[50 Gacha Points Awarded!]
[Level 1 Gacha System Unlocked!]
[100 Points = 1 Spin]
[PING!]
[Kaelen doesn't know how to feel about this sudden change. He thinks you've gone insane—but perhaps in a good way.]
Hardheaded but soft, huh? Is this what it feels like to have a younger brother?