If historians ever looked back at this specific point in time, they would call it the "Golden Age of Heroes." Kaito, however, preferred the term "The Testicle Era." It was a period defined by men in spandex making incredibly bold choices with their groin-area costume design and an absolute, balls-to-the-wall disregard for municipal property.
Kaito stood on a shaky ladder outside the Arisaka Hardware Shop, holding a caulk gun like a man who had lost all hope in humanity.
Across the street, a "Hero-Villain Exchange" had occurred an hour ago. A minor villain with a "Brick-Kinetic" quirk had decided to use the local bakery as a source of ammunition.
A Pro-Hero named Stone Wall had arrived to stop him by predictably growing even larger bricks and smashing them together.
The result was a neighborhood that looked like a giant had played a very aggressive game of Tetris and then gave up halfway through.
"Ninety-five percent of all quirk-related incidents could be solved if heroes just learned to de-escalate with words instead of tectonic plates," Kaito thought, sealing a hairline crack in the shop's upper window frame.
He climbed down the ladder, his knees popping with a sound that signaled the end of his teenage youth and the beginning of his "grumpy old man" arc. He wasn't a god; he was just a kid whose joints were tired of the constant vibrations from nearby explosions.
"Kaito! Did you finish the sealant?" Saki called out from inside. She was currently arguing with an insurance adjuster over the phone about whether "Tactical Masonry" counted as a natural disaster.
"It's done, Grandma. But if the next hero has a 'Magma' quirk, we're just going to let the shop melt. I'm out of heat-resistant caulk, and my back is killing me."
Kaito walked to the front of the shop and began sweeping up the fine white dust that covered everything. This was the "Tension." The world was getting louder and flashier, but the price of bread remained the same and the cost of fixing a hole in your roof was skyrocketing because "Hero-Grade Damage" required specialized contractors.
The shop bell rang. It wasn't a customer. It was a group of his classmates from the local middle school. They were all wearing their school jackets, looking energized and hopeful.
"Arisaka! Did you see it?" Kenji shouted, his fountain-pen fingers twitching with excitement.
"Stone-Wall was right there! He did the 'Crushing Bastion' move! It was incredible!"
Kaito continued sweeping, his rhythm undisturbed. He felt a dull ache in his shoulder.
"I saw the bakery lose its front door, Kenji. I also saw the baker crying into a pile of shattered sourdough. Was that part of the 'incredible' experience?"
Kenji rolled his eyes. "You're so depressing, man. You're fifteen! You should be hyped! The UA entrance exams are only a few months away. Are you seriously not even going to try? You're always working, you've probably got more stamina than half the kids in class."
Kaito stopped sweeping and looked at his classmates. They were bright-eyed. They believed in the dream. They believed that having a quirk that let you grow hair or change the color of your spit meant they were the main characters of the world.
"I have a shift at the convenience store at 10 PM," Kaito said, his voice flat. "And I have three orders for plumbing supplies that need to be delivered by noon. While you're dreaming about UA, I'm dreaming about a world where my taxes don't go toward repairing a bridge every time a hero has a bad day. We are not the same."
"You're just bitter because you can't activate your quirk," one of the other boys muttered, giving Kaito a pitying look.
"I'm not bitter," Kaito thought as they walked away, laughing. "I'm just the only one who realized that in a world of people who can fly, someone still has to fix the toilets they clog."
.....
The afternoon was a relentless, manual grind. Neighbors kept coming in, but they weren't buying new tools for fun projects. They were buying "Repair Kits."
"Kaito-kun, the vibration from the fight loosened my water pipes again," Mrs. Yamamoto sighed, placing a handful of coins on the counter. "And my grandson wants to be a hero just like Stone Wall. He was jumping off the couch all morning, nearly broke the coffee table."
"Tell him to practice the 'Heroic Act of Not Breaking the Furniture' instead," Kaito said, handing her a roll of Teflon tape. It was heavy, and his wrist twinged. He wasn't a powerhouse; he was just a kid who was very used to the weight of metal. "It's less flashy, but it'll save you a lot of money."
As the sun began to set, he went to the back of the shop to move some heavy galvanized pipes. Usually, it took him a bit of effort to hoist the 50lb bundles. He reached down, gripped the steel, and groaned as he heaved them onto the rack. His muscles burned, and his breath came in short gasps.
"Still heavy," he wheezed, wiping sweat from his brow. "At least physics still works for me, even if it doesn't work for the guys in spandex."
He finished the inventory by 8:00 PM. By the time he headed to his graveyard shift at the convenience store, the "Tension" in the air was palpable. The news was filled with reports of All Might moving his base of operations to Musutafu. The city was vibrating with anticipation.
Kaito walked past a giant TV screen in the town square. All Might was there, laughing, saving a hundred people from a fire. The crowd was cheering.
Kaito looked at his watch. 9:55 PM.
"I don't care if the future Symbol of Peace is in town," Kaito muttered, breaking into a tired jog. "If I'm late for my shift, Sato-san is going to dock my pay, and I still have to pay for Grandma's new knee brace. All Might isn't going to pay my rent."
He arrived at the FamilyMart at 9:59 PM, his lungs burning and his legs feeling like lead. He was exhausted, sweaty, and thoroughly normal.
He clocked in, pulled on his polyester vest, and took his place behind the register.
"Let the heroes have the sky," Kaito thought, his internal monologue settling into a comfortable, cynical hum. "I have a date with a shipment of refrigerated yogurt and a floor that isn't going to mop itself."
The "Testicle Era" was in full swing, but Kaito Arisaka was just trying to make sure the barcodes scanned correctly.