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Chapter 12 - Chapter 12: Why can't I stop thinking about Lin Feng!?

[Central Plaza Restaurant, September 15 — 12:18 PM]

Lin Feng and Xiao Yue reached the entrance together, their silhouettes framed by the midday sunlight streaming through the glass doors.

Just before stepping outside, Xiao Yue paused and reached up slowly.

Her fingers found the edge of her hood, and she pulled it back over her head in one smooth motion. Long black hair disappeared under the fabric, her face vanishing into familiar shadows. The oversized glasses slid back into place, obscuring what little remained visible.

In seconds, the breathtaking goddess transformed back into a plain nobody.

The crowd behind them erupted.

"Wait, she's covering up AGAIN?!"

"Why would you HIDE if you look like THAT?!"

"That face could launch a thousand careers and she's HIDING it?!"

But Lin Feng didn't pause or explain. He didn't even glance back at the chaos swirling behind them.

He just pushed open the door and led her through into the warm September afternoon.

The glass swung shut with a soft click, and then they were gone.

--------------------

Zhang Tingting hadn't moved from her spot near the back of the restaurant.

She kept replaying it in her head—Lin Feng's step-sister standing in that service corridor, half-hidden in shadow, watching everything with a look that could curdle milk.

The woman hadn't said a word.

She'd just raised one finger to her lips, held Zhang Tingting's gaze for a long uncomfortable moment, and then she slipped away like she'd never been there at all.

What the hell was that all about?

And why do I feel like I just got threatened?

Zhang Tingting rubbed the back of her neck, trying to shake off the crawling sensation under her skin.

First the class weirdo reveals herself as a stunning beauty who's been stalking Lin Feng for five years.

Now his step-sister shows up in the shadows looking like she wants to kill someone.

How many women are watching this guy?

What is actually going on here?

The jazz music overhead felt mocking now, all cheerful piano against the weird tension still thick in the air.

Zhang Tingting forced herself to stop thinking about it. She could think about that later. Right now, there was a more immediate problem.

She looked across the restaurant and found Su Qingxue exactly where she'd been standing this whole time—right in the middle of everything, surrounded by whispers and phone cameras, not moving at all.

Her hands just hung there at her sides.

Her face was... blank. Not upset, not angry, not embarrassed. Just blank.

Okay. That's not good.

Zhang Tingting pushed her way through the crowd, muttering apologies as she squeezed past people still gawking and recording.

When she finally reached Su Qingxue, she touched her arm gently.

"Qingxue? Hey." She ducked her head a little, trying to catch her friend's eyes. "You okay?"

Su Qingxue slowly turned to look at her, and Zhang Tingting felt something cold slide down her spine.

Because Su Qingxue was smiling.

Not a fake smile, not a strained one—a real smile. Small and soft, like she'd just heard a bit of pleasant news.

"I'm fine, Tingting."

Zhang Tingting opened her mouth, then closed it again. She didn't know what to say to that.

You just got torn apart in front of three hundred people.

You just watched Lin Feng walk out with another woman without even looking back at you.

And you're... fine?

"Okay," she said slowly. "Let's just—let's get out of here, alright?"

She took Su Qingxue's arm and started steering her toward the exit.

Her friend didn't resist, didn't react, didn't do much of anything really. She just let herself be led, feet moving on autopilot, eyes fixed on nothing.

It was like walking next to a mannequin.

Behind them, the whispers followed.

"Poor thing. She's in shock."

"Did you see her face? She definitely loved him."

"Too bad, she realized it a little too late."

--------------------

[Campus Walkway / Quiet Garden, 12:25 PM]

Zhang Tingting pulled her away from the main paths, steering her clear of the stares and the phones and the endless whispers that seemed to follow them everywhere.

She found a quiet garden area tucked behind the old library building, where wooden benches sat beneath ancient oak trees. The noise of the campus felt far away here.

She guided Su Qingxue onto one of the benches and crouched down in front of her, searching her face for any sign of what was going on inside her head.

"Qingxue, talk to me." She kept her voice gentle but firm. "What just happened in there?"

Su Qingxue stared past her at nothing, her eyes unfocused and distant.

"I'm fine. Really."

"You just got publicly humiliated in front of hundreds of people!"

Su Qingxue considered this for a moment, and genuine confusion flickered across her features.

"Did I?"

Zhang Tingting's chest tightened.

What the hell... How is that even a response?

"Qingxue, everyone saw those videos. Everyone heard what that girl said—the numbers, the statistics, all of it."

Silence stretched between them. A breeze rustled through the oak leaves overhead.

Then, quietly: "Actually... I think I'm relieved somehow."

Zhang Tingting's jaw dropped. "RELIEVED?!"

"I never loved him, Tingting." Su Qingxue's voice was calm and certain, like she was stating a simple fact. "I never did."

She looked up and met Zhang Tingting's eyes directly.

"So why should I be heartbroken? That would be dishonest."

The words made sense. On the surface, they made perfect logical sense.

But something about them felt deeply wrong.

The tone was too even. The calmness too complete. There wasn't a single crack of emotion anywhere in her voice.

This doesn't match what I just saw.

This doesn't match the woman who stood there frozen, staring at the door long after he disappeared through it.

Zhang Tingting's mind raced back to those numbers Xiao Yue had listed in front of everyone.

2,847 messages sent. 323 responses returned.

1,154 coffees bought. Zero given back.

Forty thousand yuan on birthday gifts every year. Three birthdays forgotten completely.

And then her thoughts turned uncomfortably toward herself.

Three years of taking Lin Feng's money. Three years of playing matchmaker, giving advice, accepting payments, telling herself she was just helping her friend.

Was I complicit in this?

Did I help enable something I didn't even understand?

And now there was Lin Feng's step-sister to think about too—watching them from the shadows with that finger pressed to her lips.

What else is going on that I don't know about?

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[Campus Café, 12:40 PM]

Zhang Tingting couldn't stand the silence anymore.

"Let's get some tea," she said, pulling Su Qingxue to her feet. "Something warm."

She found a small café tucked away on a side street, away from the main campus thoroughfare. Fewer students here. Fewer stares.

She ordered two cups of oolong and set one in front of Su Qingxue.

Her friend didn't touch it.

Instead, Su Qingxue pulled out her phone and started scrolling.

Social media was exploding.

Videos multiplying by the minute. Comments in the thousands already. Her face on every feed, every group chat, every gossip account on campus.

CAMPUS BELLE DESTROYED BY MYSTERIOUS GODDESS

LIN FENG'S SECRET ADMIRER REVEALED — MORE BEAUTIFUL THAN SU QINGXUE?!

THE BOOTLICKER'S REVENGE: FOUR YEARS OF RECEIPTS EXPOSED

Su Qingxue read them all.

One by one. Scrolling slowly. Her expression blank.

No anger. No embarrassment. No shame.

Like she was reading news about a stranger.

Zhang Tingting watched her, horror building in her chest.

This isn't right. This isn't Qingxue.

The woman who spent hours perfecting every social media post. Who obsessed over every detail of her public image. Who would spiral for days over a single unflattering photo.

Now she's reading thousands of comments calling her a gold-digger and she doesn't even flinch?

"Qingxue." Zhang Tingting reached across the table and touched her hand. "You're scaring me."

Su Qingxue looked up.

"What are you actually feeling right now? Really feeling?"

For the first time, something cracked in Su Qingxue's composure. Confusion bloomed across her face—real confusion, raw and visible.

"Honestly?" She set down her phone. "I don't know."

She struggled for words.

"I should be angry. Logically, I should be furious. Everyone says I should be devastated."

A pause.

"But I'm not. I just feel... strange. Different."

Her hand rose to her chest, pressing against the fabric of her blouse.

"Like something shifted inside me. Something I can't identify or explain."

Zhang Tingting stared at her friend.

Something broke inside Qingxue.

But what exactly?

Is it about love? Or something else entirely?

The untouched tea grew cold between them.

--------------------

[Walking to Dorm, 12:55 PM]

They finally left the café and headed back toward the dormitory.

Su Qingxue walked like a ghost beside her, her eyes unfocused and steps mechanical.

She didn't seem to register where she was going at all.

Zhang Tingting had to take her by the elbow and physically steer her around obstacles—a lamppost here, a group of chattering students there, a delivery scooter parked carelessly across the sidewalk.

"Watch out. Step up here. Turn left."

Su Qingxue obeyed each instruction without acknowledgment, her feet moving only because Zhang Tingting told them to.

Like a puppet on invisible strings.

The September sun hung warm overhead, but neither of them seemed to feel it.

All around them, the whispers followed like shadows.

Word had spread across the entire campus by now. Phones buzzed with notifications in every pocket they passed. Every face that turned their way lingered a beat too long, eyes widening with recognition.

"That's Su Qingxue!"

"She looks completely fine though? That's so strange."

"She's in shock. Poor girl finally confessed and got rejected."

"She tried to become worthy of him and he moved on in one day. How tragic."

"She realized it too late."

But other voices cut through with sharper edges.

"Wait, she strung him along for four years..."

"Fifteen million yuan. That's not exactly innocent."

The melon-eating crowd, the onlookers, continued passing their judgment, yet Su Qingxue didn't seem to notice any of it.

Not the stares burning into her back. Not the whispers swirling around her. Not the phones still raised in her direction, recording her every step.

She was somewhere else entirely—lost inside her own head, unreachable.

And inside that head, her mind kept circling back to the same image, over and over again.

The way he had looked at her hands. Not her face. Her hands.

Like she was an object to be examined and set aside.

Lin Feng never looked at my face. Not once.

He didn't even look up when I was standing right in front of him. Not even when I was holding his hand. Not even when I asked him to wait for me.

Why does that bother me so much?

Why can't I stop thinking about it?

Zhang Tingting glanced sideways at her friend's distant expression, and a chill ran through her despite the warm afternoon.

I've never seen Qingxue like this.

Not in the three years since Lin Feng came into their lives.

No…

Not even once.

This was the same woman who obsessed over every detail of her public image. Who had cultivated her campus belle reputation since high school. Who always knew exactly where every camera was and how to angle her face for maximum effect.

And now she was walking through campus like a sleepwalker while hundreds of people stared and whispered and recorded her every move.

She didn't even seem to know they existed.

What happened to you back there, Qingxue?

What did Lin Feng do to you?

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[Female Dormitory, Room 403, 1:20 PM]

They finally reached their dorm room.

Zhang Tingting pushed open the door and guided Su Qingxue inside, letting it swing shut behind them.

Zhang Tingting had only shared this dorm room for two weeks with Su Qingxue, but she already knew every corner of it by now.

As she looked around, Su Qingxue's side of the room seemed to glow under a harsh new light.

The bed with its imported silk sheets. The mahogany desk with the built-in charging station. The floor-length curtains. The laptop. The tablet. Even the phone still clutched in Qingxue's hand.

None of this was new to her. She'd lived alongside these things since the semester began, watched deliveries arrive almost daily during that first week, accepted them as simply part of Su Qingxue's life.

Never. Not even once had Zhang Tingting thought of the price tag behind all of this.

But now she knew.

Fifteen million yuan over four years.

That number changed everything.

I've been sleeping three meters away from all this, and I never stopped to think about what it really meant.

This whole side of the room is a shrine to Lin Feng's love for Qingxue.

And she never loved him. Not even once.

Su Qingxue drifted over to her bed and sat down on the edge, still detached, still distant, her hands resting limply in her lap.

Zhang Tingting hovered near her own desk, unsure what to do or say. The silence pressed down on both of them.

Before she could figure out how to break it—

Su Qingxue's phone rang.

The sound cut through the quiet like a knife, and both of them jumped.

Su Qingxue looked down at the screen, and Zhang Tingting watched all the color drain from her face.

"It's my father."

Her hand trembled slightly as she raised the phone to her ear.

"Hello, Father—"

"WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED?!"

The voice exploded through the speaker like a bomb, so loud that Zhang Tingting could hear every word clearly from across the room.

She winced at the sheer volume and fury behind it.

But Su Qingxue's face did something strange. Instead of crumpling, it smoothed out completely. Emotionless. Detached. Like a mask sliding into place.

"Father, I can explain—"

"Lin Feng publicly called you out! In front of THREE HUNDRED WITNESSES!"

"There are videos of you EVERYWHERE on social media! EVERYONE has seen it!"

"Do you have ANY IDEA what this MEANS for our business?!"

His voice was harsh and angry, edged with something that sounded almost like panic.

He wasn't asking about her feelings.

He wasn't even asking if she was okay.

It was only about business. Money. Connections.

"Father, please, let me—"

"The Lin Family connections! The deals we secured last month!"

"The LOANS we took out based on those connections!"

Zhang Tingting's eyes went wide.

Loans?

"Based on the ASSUMPTION you'd marry into that family eventually!"

Her hand flew to her mouth.

Marriage? They took out LOANS based on the assumption she'd marry him?

"Without Lin Feng, those deals will collapse IMMEDIATELY!"

"The bank will call the loans the MOMENT they hear about this!"

"Do you understand what that means?!"

"BANKRUPTCY, Su Qingxue! Complete financial RUIN!"

"Our family will be DESTROYED!"

Zhang Tingting felt the ground shift beneath her feet.

All this time, I'd thought it was simple—a rich boy chasing a pretty girl, showering her with gifts she didn't want.

But loans? Marriage assumptions? Business deals?

This was something beyond what I could have ever imagined. This was calculated right from the very start.

And I… I played a role in all of this…

The Su family had leveraged their daughter's future. Borrowed money against it. Made deals based on it. All of it betting on her eventually marrying Lin Feng.

Su Qingxue wasn't a daughter to these people.

She was an asset. An investment. A resource to be exploited.

"I—I didn't know about the loans—" Su Qingxue's voice came out small and uncertain for the first time.

"Did you even THINK?! You NEVER think about anyone but yourself!"

"Four years! Four years of carefully securing that boy!"

"Four years of investment! Time! Resources! Planning!"

"And you threw it ALL away in ONE SINGLE DAY!"

Each word landed like a blade between the ribs.

But Su Qingxue's expression remained blank throughout, her face showing nothing at all.

"Fix this. Whatever it takes. I don't care HOW."

"We NEED the Lin Family connection. Do you understand me?"

"I don't care if you have to BEG on your knees."

Zhang Tingting's entire body went rigid, her nails digging into her palms hard enough to leave marks.

She pressed her back against her desk, feeling like she was intruding on something she was never meant to witness.

She wanted to say something. To interrupt. To tell this man to stop.

But her throat had closed up completely, and her hands wouldn't stop shaking.

"I don't care if you have to grovel and humiliate yourself."

"I don't care WHAT you have to do or how low you have to sink."

"You WILL fix this situation. IMMEDIATELY."

"This is not optional. This is not negotiable."

"This is not a REQUEST, Su Qingxue. This is an ORDER."

"Do you understand me? DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!"

When Su Qingxue answered, her voice came out steady and calm.

"Yes, Father. I understand."

No trembling. No breaking. Just quiet acceptance.

"Good. I expect results. SOON."

"Don't disappoint me again."

Click.

He hung up without another word.

No goodbye. No comfort. No concern for her emotional state whatsoever.

Just demands. Threats. Expectations.

The silence that followed crashed into the room like a physical weight, pressing down on everything.

Zhang Tingting stared at her friend from across the small space that separated their beds, feeling something cold spreading through her chest.

This isn't how people react.

Not when someone orders them to beg. To grovel. To crawl on their knees for money.

Normal people rage. They cry. They fight back.

They don't just sit there looking so peaceful.

And yet Su Qingxue did exactly that—sitting on the edge of her bed, hands in her lap, face showing nothing at all.

Zhang Tingting felt a chill crawl up her spine. She couldn't look away.

Qingxue... what is wrong with you?

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[Room 403, 1:35 PM]

The silence stretched on, heavy and thick.

Zhang Tingting didn't know what to say. She wasn't even sure if there was anything she could say after what she'd just heard.

She sat down slowly on the edge of her own bed, her mind still reeling from the phone call. The accusations. The threats. The casual cruelty of a father treating his daughter like a business asset.

Across from her, Su Qingxue sat motionless on her own bed, staring down at the phone in her hands.

She wasn't trembling. She wasn't crying.

She was just... sitting there, lost somewhere inside her own head, processing something Zhang Tingting couldn't begin to understand.

The afternoon sun slanted through the curtains, casting long golden ribbons across the floor between them. Dust motes drifted lazily through the light. Outside, the muffled sounds of campus life continued as if nothing had happened—distant laughter, a bicycle bell, someone calling out to a friend.

In here, the world had gone very still.

Then Su Qingxue's fingers began to move.

It was slow at first, almost unconscious—the automatic motion of someone who had done the same thing a thousand times before. She unlocked her phone, opened WeChat, and scrolled through her contacts without seeming to think about what she was doing.

And then she stopped.

One name filled the screen.

Lin Feng.

His profile picture stared back at her—that familiar face she had seen almost every day for the past four years.

She didn't scroll past it. Didn't tap on it.

She didn't even move.

She just... looked.

One minute passed.

Zhang Tingting watched her from across the room, a crease forming between her brows. She wanted to say something, but the expression on Su Qingxue's face made her hesitate.

Two minutes.

Su Qingxue's thumb still hadn't moved. Her eyes stayed fixed on that small square image, her breathing slow and even.

Four years of seeing this face.

Four years of feeling nothing when I looked at it. Sometimes annoyance. Sometimes mild disgust. And every once in a while, a flicker of guilt that I pushed away before it could take root.

But now?

Three minutes.

Something stirred in her chest—something unfamiliar, something she had no words for.

Why can't I look away?

Her heart was beating strangely now. Not fast, exactly. Not the racing pulse of panic or fear.

It was something else entirely. Something she didn't recognize.

What is this feeling?

Her mind grasped for answers and found only her father's words, still echoing.

Loans. Bankruptcy. Ruin.

Without Lin Feng, everything falls apart.

My family. My future. My entire life.

He could destroy everything about me with just a single word.

She let that sink in, turning it over in her mind.

The realization should have terrified her. It should have made her desperate. Should have sent her spiraling into fury or fear or anything at all.

But instead, all she could picture were his fingers—closing slowly around her throat, gentle for now, but ready to squeeze at any moment.

Four minutes.

That thought should have broken her.

But instead, something else was happening.

Something warm was spreading through her chest. Strange and overwhelming, like nothing she had ever felt before. It flooded through her body like a slow electric current, making her breath catch, making her chest ache in ways she couldn't explain.

The way he walked away from me.

The way he didn't even look back.

The way he took that girl's hand and left without a single word.

He looked so cold. So dismissive. So completely... done.

Five minutes.

The feeling only grew stronger.

She couldn't look away from his face. Couldn't bring herself to close the app.

She couldn't even think clearly about anything except that strange, intense, overwhelming sensation spreading through every part of her.

Zhang Tingting watched her friend stare at that screen, and something cold settled in the pit of her stomach.

What is going on inside your head right now, Qingxue?

What are you feeling?

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Su Qingxue had been staring at Lin Feng's profile picture for five full minutes. Maybe longer.

Zhang Tingting had already lost track of time watching her best friend in this state.

That look on Su Qingxue's face—Zhang Tingting had never seen anything like it before. It wasn't anger. It wasn't sadness. It wasn't even confusion.

It was something deeper. Something raw and unguarded, rising up from a place Su Qingxue probably didn't even know existed.

And then it hit her.

Hold on.

That look on her face...

Is Qingxue in love with him?

Zhang Tingting stared at her friend, trying to make sense of what she was seeing.

She didn't want to believe it. It seemed too cruel, too perfectly tragic to be real.

Yet what else could explain this? The staring. The silence. That raw, unguarded expression she'd never seen before.

Four years of keeping him at arm's length. Four years of taking his gifts and ignoring his feelings. And she's only figuring it out now?

Oh, Qingxue...

Zhang Tingting's chest ached as she watched her friend drown in something she couldn't name.

Su Qingxue still hadn't moved.

Her eyes remained fixed on that small square picture, her whole being swallowed up by a feeling she couldn't name—something that had taken hold of her and wouldn't let go.

Something fundamental had shifted inside her today.

But what?

She didn't know. Couldn't even begin to guess.

All she knew, with a certainty that settled deep into her bones, was that nothing would ever be the same again.

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[End of Chapter 12]

 

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