The four S-Class Heroes leapt from the rooftop and landed on the street.
In an instant, cheers and admiring stares converged from every direction; they had become the center of the world.
Amid the deafening joy, countless hands quietly reached for that alluringly smooth bald head.
Sensing trouble, Saitama jerked his head left and right, dodging a few grabs, but more hands kept closing in.
Surrounded by ordinary citizens, he was boxed in; his gleaming scalp was rubbed like a lucky walnut.
Everyone who managed to touch his head would raise that hand in triumph:
Hahaha, I got it! I touched Caped Baldy's head—it feels amazing!
Really? No wonder he's one of Z-City's saviors; even his scalp is heroic—my turn!
Me too! Stop shoving! I wanna feel that chubby-looking dome!
Woohoo, I brushed KING's palm—I'm not washing this hand for three days!
Feeling the barrage of pats, Saitama froze, the corner of his eye twitching.
You bastards—keep petting my head and I'll wish the same bald fate on every one of you!
Power unrivaled, yes, but the price had been every last hair; baldness was the thorn forever stuck in Saitama's heart.
An occasional joke he could endure, but now they chanted "bald" while dribbling his skull like a basketball.
Unable to take any more, he scratched the hair he didn't have and addressed the ecstatic crowd:
Uh, well… I've got stuff to do, so bye.
Without waiting for an answer he vaulted skyward and vanished from sight.
After a stunned silence, every gaze swung to King.
Cold sweat beaded on King's forehead—this was bad.
Damn it, without the little cue-ball drawing their fire, what do I do?
After 0.01 seconds of hesitation he, too, flickered and disappeared.
As he left, a sentence drifted into Bang's ear:
Old man Bang, please haul Genos to the Hero Association; I'll pick him up and collect the credit.
Seeing Genos immobile from system overload, Bang hoisted the cyborg with one arm and pushed through the crowd.
K-KING, don't go!
Quit whining—KING rushed off because a terrible disaster's about to strike and he's going to save us alone!
Why didn't you say so? The Strongest Man on the Surface always puts humanity first—we salute you!
Listening to the heartfelt praise, Bang scratched his chin and carried Genos away.
Good grief, every one of them bolts in the blink of an eye and leaves the metal kid to me…
Soon news that the meteor threat had been neutralized swept every city.
The Hero Association helped fan the flames, but the loudest trumpets were Z-City's grateful citizens online.
People already took it for granted that KING had handled the meteor—just another legend for the man called The Strongest on the Surface.
This time the heated buzz centered on a new S-Class Hero: Caped Baldy.
Rumor has it he shattered nearly every physical record in the Hero Association's tests, surpassing the limits by staggering margins.
One anonymous examiner claimed a god seemed to dwell within Caped Baldy, a Ferocious beast in human form.
Since his promotion he'd appeared in public often; Z-City residents regularly watched him one-punch monsters into oblivion.
During the recent meteor crisis, Caped Baldy and The Strongest Man on the Surface had supposedly blown the asteroid apart and vaporized the debris.
Online, Saitama's reputation soared; unlike in the original story, there were no sneers despite his absurd feats.
The simple reason: he was S-Class.
When you're only a C-Class, however Heaven-Defying your feats, the public cries "cheat."
Their narrow vision can't jump its own rails; C-Class must be weak.
But once you're S-Class, in their eyes you're a god—whatever miracle happens, of course it was you.
KING, of course, is the exception; born with a kingly face and the intimidating King Engine, he scrambles common sense.
As people chatted, some decided "Caped Baldy" sounded too silly for a hero.
Online debate raged until consensus emerged: his name should be One-Punch Man.
After all, no matter the monster, the public always saw him end it with one punch, and his outfit resembled a certain superhero, just a different palette.
The outcry reached the top; the Hero Association's executives convened another time-wasting meeting.
Their topic: whether to change S-Class Rank 14's title from Caped Baldy to the popular choice, One-Punch Man.
They spent three hours on that single question, though no one could say what exactly was discussed.
Sitch sat in a corner, staring at the ceiling in despair.
How much longer can you fools talk about this!?