It is already late afternoon when QI Gai returns to Clear Moon Pavillion.
He steps inside quietly, his footsteps light after wandering the Shen Mansion for nearly half an hour, memorizing routes, courtyards, and exits. The moment he sees Shen Qingwan seated by her desk, he stops and bows.
"This one apologizes," he says calmly. "I returned late."
Qingwan looks up from the papers in front of her.
She does not frown. There is no displeasure in her eyes only calm acceptance.
"There is no need to apologize," she replies. "You were unfamiliar with the grounds. It's normal."
Qi Gai straightens and moves to stand beside her again, as silent and composed as before.
Qingwan studies him for a moment, then speaks again, almost casually.
"Your name," she says.
Qi Gai looks at her.
"Qi Gai… it literally means beggar," Qingwan continues. "That name will bring you nothing but trouble in the future."
She turns slightly and gestures. "Su, help me think of a new name for him."
Maid Su blinks, caught off guard. "A new… name?"
She looks at Qi Gai, then scratches her head lightly, clearly at a loss. "This servant… isn't very good at naming."
Qi Gai lowers his gaze.
"You don't have to trouble yourself, Lady," he says evenly. "You may call me whatever you wish. It makes no difference to me."
His voice is steady, without bitterness.
"I am your person now."
The words are simple but they land heavily.
Qingwan's fingers pause against the edge of the table.
She looks at him again, more carefully this time.
Then, slowly, a name forms in her mind.
"Shou An," she says.
Qi Gai lifts his eyes.
"It means Protector of Peace," Qingwan explains. "Someone who stands guard so others may live without fear."
Maid Su's eyes light up instantly.
"What a beautiful name!" she exclaims. "It suits him perfectly, Lady!"
Qingwan nods faintly, satisfied.
She meets Qi Gai's gaze.
"From today onward," she says calmly, "you are Shou An."
Qi Gai no, Shou An straightens.
He bows deeply.
"This one accepts."
[A WHILE AGO]
By the time the water clock strikes 5 in the evening, dusk has already begun to settle over Clear Moon Pavillion.
Lanterns are lit one by one, their soft glow warming the room. Shen Qingwan prefers to eat early lighter meals, fewer burdens on the body. It is a habit she formed long ago.
Dinner is simple.
A bowl of white rice, steamed until fragrant.Lightly boiled vegetables, still bright with color.A nourishing soup simmered slowly, clear yet rich with nutrients.
Qingwan surveys the table and nods faintly.
"Prepare one more bowl," she says.
The maids responded at once.
"Yes, Fourth Lady."
"And," Qingwan adds, as if it were an afterthought, "prepare proper meat dishes as well. They are for QI Gai when he returns."
The maids said nothing, immediately carrying out her orders.
[PRESENT]
When the food is ready, Maid Su sits down across from Qingwan. Shou An, however, remains standing beside Qingwan, posture straight, eyes forward.
Qingwan notices.
She lifts her gaze and frowns faintly. "Sit down."
Shou An stiffens. "My duty is to guard you."
"We are eating," Qingwan replies calmly. "I do not allow anyone to stand guard while I'm having dinner."
Maid Su quickly adds, "That's right. If you keep standing, even I won't dare to eat properly."
Shou An hesitates for a brief moment, then finally sits down beside Qingwan, his back straight, movements restrained.
The atmosphere softens.
They begin to eat.
Qingwan eats slowly, savoring each bite. Maid Su chatters quietly, speaking of small things the tea house earlier, the confusion with Third Lady Shen, the surprised looks of the servants.
Qingwan listens, smiling occasionally, responding with gentle remarks and teasing comments. Laughter escapes them more than once, light and unguarded.
It does not feel like mistress and maid.
It feels like friends sharing a meal.
Shou An eats in silence, focused and composed, yet his attention never strays far. He listens to their conversation without interruption, memorizing their tones, their habits, the ease between them.
The room is warm. The food was still warm.
After dinner, the other maids quietly enters to clear the table. Porcelain bowls are lifted, chopsticks wrapped neatly, movements careful and soundless.
Maid Su follows behind them, then turns and says, "Prepare some tea. Fourth Lady always drinks tea after dinner."
The maids bow and hurry off.
Shen Qingwan rises from her seat and steps outside.
The night air greets her gently.
In the courtyard stands an very old tree, its branches stretching wide and protective. Beneath it hangs a wooden swing , swaying faintly in the breeze. She slows unconsciously when she sees it.
She used to play there as a child. Laughing. Carefree.
To the side is a small stone table, smooth from years of use. Beyond it lies a quiet pond, moonlight shimmering on the water's surface where fish gather lazily, waiting for food that does not come tonight.
Above them all hangs a full round moon, round and unblemished, pouring silver light across the courtyard. The air is cool and fresh. Qingwan breathes deeply.
For the first time in a long while, she feels… alive.
She sits down near the table, gaze lifted toward the sky.
Maid Su soon returns, placing a cup of warm tea gently beside her. "Careful, it's hot."
Qingwan nods in thanks, wrapping her fingers around the porcelain.
"You may retire for today," she says softly. "Both of you. Sleep early."
Maid Su nods.
Shou An hesitates, instinctively straightening. "I should remain...."
"No," Qingwan interrupts gently but firmly. "Go."
Maid Su smiles, then reaches out and grabs Shou An's sleeve. "Come on. If the Lady says so, we should listen."
She drags him away before he can protest further.
Shou An allows himself to be pulled along, but as they reach the edge of the courtyard, he turns his head back.
Under the full moon, Shen Qingwan sits alone.
She does not look graceful.
She looks small.
A solitary figure bathed in moonlight, her back straight yet heavy as though carrying something unseen. In her stillness, Shou An senses layers beneath the calm surface: regrets, resentmant, bitterness, despair, and a deep, quiet grief that has nowhere to go.