I walked around the market with this naïve one by my side.
She was looking so excited. Eyes sparkling at every shop we passed. Mouth hanging open at displays she found interesting.
Complete opposite of what she had claimed earlier.
'Scared my ass.'
She was peeking into every store as if she had never seen such things in her own kingdom. As if the royal palace didn't have a hundred times better merchandise.
Infact, I should be the one getting excited. This was my first time in the capital. Not hers.
When I was busy observing the surroundings, she grabbed my sleeve.
YANK.
Pulled me toward her.
"Goonman! There! I need those!"
She pointed at an Artificial Jewellery Shop.
'Goonman.'
That was the name I had given her. It had a certain vibe to it. And more importantly, I didn't want to give her my real name.
The less a princess knew about me, the better.
I just followed her into the shop.
The moment we entered, she started rummaging through the sachets of packed jewellery hanging on display racks.
Grabbing them with one hand while searching with the other.
It went on and on.
Until both of her hands were completely filled with packets.
She turned toward me. Beaming.
"Which one will suit me?"
"Who do you think I am? How the hell can I see through fifty of them?"
I gestured at the mountain in her arms.
"And on top of that, they're all inside packets."
Understanding kicked in.
Slowly.
Very slowly.
Then she started unpacking all of them. In a hurry. Tearing through the plastic wraps like they were her mortal enemies.
By the time she was done, those wrappings were completely useless. Shredded beyond repair.
She laid all the jewellery on the display table. Pushing aside the items that were already there.
Then looked at me with a proud face.
"Now tell."
I sighed.
"I think you didn't hear the part where I said there were too many. You just listened to my additional point about the packets."
I glanced at the shopkeeper.
He was scanning us with cold, angry eyes. Watching the destruction his display had just suffered.
I sighed again. Wanted to get out of here as quickly as possible.
I picked up a pair of earrings. Emerald studs. Simple but elegant.
Then a bracelet. Silver chain with small green gems embedded.
Handed them to her.
"These will suit you. They match your green eyes."
Her eyes literally glowed.
"Goonman! You have such great taste!"
She clapped her hands together. "Why don't you help me wear them?"
She brought her ears closer to me. Tilting her head. As if saying 'put them on right here.'
'What the hell am I doing for money?'
I sighed internally. Took the earrings from her hand.
Carefully attached them to her earlobes while she stood perfectly still. Like a doll being dressed.
She wore the bracelet herself. Fumbled with the clasp a few times before finally getting it on.
Then hurried to a mirror on the wall.
TAP TAP TAP.
Her eyes sparkled at her reflection.
"I'll get these ones then!"
She turned to the shopkeeper. Walked up to the counter with all the confidence of royalty.
And placed a single gold coin on the surface.
The shopkeeper stared at it.
Then at her.
Then at the massacre of unpacked jewellery scattered across his shop.
"Lady, that won't be enough." His voice was strained.
"You have unpacked all these items. Caused a significant loss for my business."
He crossed his arms. "At least three gold coins would be required to pay for the damage."
Celestine turned to me.
Those green eyes filled with pleading. As if silently begging me to handle this.
I knew this bastard was scamming us.
For three gold coins, I could have bought half his shop's inventory.
I would have beaten his ass right there if I hadn't already created chaos in the alley earlier. Or if this wasn't the capital where guards would swarm at the first sign of trouble.
I didn't want more problems on my plate.
So I reached into my bag. Pulled out three coins.
Slammed them on the counter with a deadly glance at the keeper.
His smug expression faltered slightly.
I took Celestine by the arm and led her out.
She was completely unbothered by what had just happened. Already looking around for other shops to raid.
"Are you serious right now?" I stopped walking. Faced her.
"Did you bring only one gold coin for shopping?"
"Yes!" She nodded happily.
"Back in my kingdom, I could buy anything with just one gold coin."
She twirled the bracelet on her wrist.
"Whenever I went shopping with father, any shopkeeper would take the gold coin and then return it back to me."
I slapped my forehead.
'Of course they did. Because you're the fucking princess. They were honored just to have you in their shops.'
"Leave it."
I waved my hand.
"Just remember to pay me back. The promised sum. Plus everything I spend on you today."
She struck a pose. Hand on chest. "I never go back on my words!"
Then her attention shifted.
She started waving excitedly at someone in the crowd. "Sis! Over here!"
I looked.
An elf girl was running toward us.
Light peach hair flowing behind her. Green eyes sharp and alert. Elegant features that seemed carved by divine hands.
She was exactly what every person on Earth would dream of.
A very fuckable elf.
But as she approached, her eyes locked onto me.
And I could tell.
She knew I was thinking lustful thoughts about her.
Which I absolutely was.
She gave me a deadly glare before turning to Celestine.
"Lady Celestine." Her voice was formal. Urgent.
"His Majesty is searching for you. Please return home immediately."
Celestine pouted. "Sis, I'm not going back to some boring party."
"But everyone is worried! You know they will find you soon. And then His Highness will punish you."
Celestine clicked her tongue.
TSK.
"Fine. I'll return."
The elf girl's shoulders relaxed.
"But only if you bring me fifteen pouches of gold."
The elf's mouth dropped open.
"Why do you need that much money?! You know I don't have that much!"
"I know." Celestine smiled innocently.
"That's exactly why I'm telling you. Go back to the mansion. Tell father or mother. Or even old man Bard. Tell them I need it urgently."
She clapped her hands.
"Then bring it back to me! That way, I'll have enough time to roam around while you're gone. And I can pay back Goonman for his services."
The elf girl's eyes snapped to me.
A knowing smile crept across her face. Cold. Dangerous. "So you're the one tricking her."
She closed the distance between us. About to say something. Or curse me. Or both.
"Hey, sis!"
Celestine stepped between us.
"He's not a bad guy! He even helped me with those—"
She stopped midway.
Both hands flew to cover her mouth. Cute. Panicked.
She must have realized that if she told what happened in the alley, her family would never let her sneak out again.
The elf girl narrowed her eyes at me. "Lady Celestine, in your eyes, everyone seems like a good person."
She straightened. "But in reality, the world is twisted. Filled with evils like him who take advantage of innocent people."
Celestine pushed her away gently. "Sis, just trust me! Go on. Take your time. Bring back the money."
She grabbed my arm. "Let's go, Goonman!"
And started dragging me away.
I glanced back at the elf girl.
She was still standing there. Watching us leave.
Then, with one final deadly gaze directed at me, she turned and walked away.
It was as if she had been waiting for me to look at her. Just so she could deliver that last warning glare.
I muttered under my breath.
"How many crazy ones will I encounter today?"