October 12, 2000 Multan Cricket Stadium Match Day 1: Multan Sultans vs. Karachi Kings
The gates opened, and the fans walked into an ambush of sugar and silk.
The Tata Group, known for their meticulous planning, had decided that just playing cricket wasn't enough. They wanted to own the soul of the city.
At every turnstile, volunteers wearing Tata-branded t-shirts handed out a heavy, decorative box to every single ticket holder.
Inside were two items:
A 1kg tin of premium Hafiz Sohan Halwa (the city's most famous sticky, nutty sweet).
A traditional hand-block printed Ajrak shawl.
By the time the stadium filled up, the stands weren't just a crowd. They were a sea of indigo and red patterns. 30,000 people were wearing the symbol of the Indus Valley civilization, gifted by an Indian corporation.
Ajay Devgn stood in the owner's box, watching the crowd unwrapping the Halwa.
"It's a masterstroke, Sir," the Tata regional manager whispered. "We just bought their loyalty for the price of a few kilos of sugar."
"We didn't buy them," Ajay corrected, watching a group of old men waving at him from the stands, draped in the Ajraks. "We honored them. In India, you don't go to a guest's house empty-handed. In Pakistan, apparently, the host feeds you until you can't move. We just returned the favor."
The Panic in the Chat Room Platform: Yahoo! Messenger Conference Room: "The Boardroom" (Secure/Invite Only) 14:00 Hours
The distinct ba-ding! notification sound echoed in the high-end hotel suites of the franchise owners across Pakistan.
Aditya had set up a private Yahoo! Conference for the owners to coordinate logistics. Instead, it had turned into a digital war room.
Preity_Z: BUZZ!!! Preity_Z: BUZZ!!!
Devgn_Ajay: I am here. Stop buzzing me. My dial-up in Multan is slow.
Preity_Z: Ajay!!! Are you crazy??? My manager just called from the stadium. You are giving free Sohan Halwa AND Ajrak shawls to 30,000 people?? 😮
King_Khan: Yaar Ajay, this is not fair. My Pathans in Peshawar are watching TV. They are asking why the Multan owner loves his fans more than I love mine. You are making us look cheap! :-/
Ness_W: Do you know the unit cost of premium Halwa? I just ran the numbers. You just blew $150k on snacks in one hour. This is unsustainable!
Devgn_Ajay: It's not snacks, Ness. It's 'Mehmaan-Nawaazi' (Hospitality). Besides, Tata is picking up the bill. They call it marketing. ;-)
King_Khan: Marketing my foot. It's bribery! Now I have to feed the whole of Peshawar or they will revoke my honorary Pathan status. You started a war, Ajay.
Preity_Z: Ness, we have to do something. If Multan gives sugar, Lahore has to give butter. We cannot lose the 'Host with the Most' title to South Punjab.
Ness_W: Fine. But I am not buying shawls. We will do food. Big food.
King_Khan: I am going bigger. I am bringing the cows. No one beats a Pashtun feast. >:-D
Devgn_Ajay: Hehe. Checkmate.
The Counter-Attack: Lahore October 14, 2000 Gaddafi Stadium, Lahore
The Wadia Group didn't just give a snack. They threw a festival.
As fans entered Gaddafi Stadium for the Lahore Lions match, they were met by the smell of butter and yeast.
The Menu: Hot Amritsari Kulchas (flown in from the Indian side of the border) paired with chilled Lahori Lassi (from the Pakistani side).
Preity Zinta grabbed the microphone on the field.
"Lahore is the heart of Punjab!" she shouted. "And Punjabis don't count calories! Today, we eat together!"
She signaled the DJ. Suddenly, the sky turned golden. She had arranged for 5,000 yellow kites to be launched simultaneously, reviving the banned tradition of Basant.
The crowd, holding a buttery Kulcha in one hand and a tall glass of Lassi in the other, looked up at the kite-filled sky and roared. The border had melted into a giant picnic.
The Feast of the Frontier October 16, 2000 Arbab Niaz Stadium, Peshawar
Shah Rukh Khan and the Bugti Chief took it personally. In Pashtun culture, hospitality (Melmastia) is a code of honor. You cannot be outdone in feeding guests.
They didn't give snack boxes. They set up a Dastarkhwan.
Outside the stadium, huge cauldrons were bubbling over wood fires. The smoke smelled of animal fat and spices.
The Menu:
Chapli Kababs: The size of dinner plates, sizzling in huge iron woks.
Kabuli Pulao: Mountains of rice topped with carrots and raisins.
"No ticket required for food!" SRK announced from the top of his SUV. "Anyone who comes to the gate eats. Even if you don't watch the match, you eat! This is the Khan's Dastarkhwan!"
It was madness. The aroma of grilled meat drifted across the city. The queue for the food was longer than the queue for the match. Even the policemen on duty were seen lining up with their helmets in hand to get a plate of Pulao.
The Biryani Ultimatum October 18, 2000 National Stadium, Karachi
Karachi was feeling left out. The Halwa was sweet, the Kulchas were rich, the Kababs were meaty.
Sourav Ganguly, the Captain of Karachi Kings, sat with the franchise owners.
"Dada, we look cheap," the owner worried. "Multan gave shawls. Peshawar is feeding the whole city. What do we do?"
Ganguly adjusted his collar. "You are Karachi. You have the ultimate weapon."
"What?"
"Biryani," Ganguly said. "But not just any Biryani. The Al-Rehman Biryani. The spicy one with the double potato."
"And," Ganguly added, a mischievous glint in his eye. "We give them Paan."
The Result
On match day, the National Stadium smelled of spices and betel nut.
Every seat had a box of steaming hot Biryani. And at the exit, there were stalls giving out "Victory Paan."
The Karachi crowd, famous for being volatile and throwing bottles, was too busy eating. When a catch was dropped, instead of rioting, they just aggressively chewed the bones.
The Auditor's View Aditya's Office, Islamabad
I sat with Shaukat Aziz, reviewing the "Logistics Reports."
"Sir," Shaukat said, looking at the spreadsheet. "The franchises have spent $6 Million on food in one week. The consumption of sugar, flour, and meat in the country has spiked by 15%."
"And the mood?" I asked.
"Euphoric," Shaukat admitted. "The police reports say crime has dropped. The Mullahs tried to organize a protest in Peshawar, but their own followers left to get the free Chapli Kababs."
I laughed.
"We did it, Shaukat. We distracted them."
"We replaced the 'War of Ideology' with the 'War of Hospitality'. No one wants to bomb a stadium that is giving them free lunch."
I looked at the TV screen. Ganguly was eating a plate of Biryani in the dugout while Afridi was munching on Halwa in the commentary box.
"Let them eat," I said. "A full stomach doesn't fight."
"Now," I turned to the real business, lowering my voice. "While everyone is in a food coma... tell Dr. Suddle to quietly start the next phase of the Afghan Refugee Registration. No one is watching the border; they are all watching the buffet."