Dionne
The silence was absolute.
It felt like no one moved or breathed and my heart simply stopped beating.
Oh goddess. Oh goddess, what have I done?
The teapot slipped from my nerveless fingers, clattering against the floor. The sound echoed through the chamber like a death knell, and I couldn't move, couldn't think, couldn't do anything but stare at what I'd done.
The King's eyes, which had been their usual gunmetal gray, began to shift. Gold bled through the iris like spilled wine, almost swallowing the gray. The temperature in the room plummeted, and I watched in frozen horror as his fingers curled against the armrest of his chair, the wood groaning under the pressure. His jaw clenched so tightly I could see the muscle jump beneath his skin.
Then he inhaled sharply through his nose, and the gold in his eyes receded. His hands unclenched slowly, deliberately, like he was forcing each finger to release one at a time.
"Your Grace, I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to—" The words tumbled out in a rush, panic making my voice high and thin.
"Silence."
The single word cut through my babbling like a blade. I choked on the rest of my apology, my throat closing up completely.
My knees gave out. I hit the stone floor hard, the impact sending shockwaves of pain up through my bones, but I barely felt it. I pressed my forehead to the cold ground, my entire body shaking so violently I could hear my teeth chattering.
"Please," I whispered into the floor. "Please, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, my hand just—"
"How difficult could it be?" His voice was low, controlled, but underneath it I could hear something darker. Something that made my wolf whimper and press herself flat. "A simple task. Pour tea. A child could manage it without incident. Yet somehow, you managed to fail spectacularly."
Heat flooded my face. Shame burned in my chest, mixing with the terror until I couldn't tell where one ended and the other began.
"Maybe we should reconsider keeping her here, Your Grace." One of the elders spoke, his voice dripping with disdain. "If she can't manage basic servant duties without incident, what use is she?"
"I agree," another chimed in. "This is exactly the kind of disruption we warned about."
Laughter rippled around the table. Not loud, but enough. Enough to make my humiliation complete. I squeezed my eyes shut, willing myself to disappear, to sink into the floor and never resurface.
"I mean, really," the first elder continued,"How does one spill an entire pot? Was she trying to bathe you, Your Grace?"
More laughter and I felt tears prick my eyes.
"Enough." The King's voice cut through the mockery like a whip. The laughter died instantly. "All of you, out. Now."
Chairs scraped against stone. Footsteps moved quickly toward the door. Within seconds, the chamber had emptied, leaving only the King and me in that suffocating silence.
I didn't dare lift my head. Didn't dare move. Every survival instinct I possessed screamed at me to stay still, stay small, stay invisible.
"Look at me."
The command left no room for disobedience. Slowly, my muscles protesting every movement, I lifted my head. I kept my eyes downcast, staring at the dark stain on his pants, unable to meet his gaze.
"I said look at me."
My eyes traveled up, past his chest, past his jaw, until finally I met those burning eyes, and looking into those eyes felt like staring into my own death. I expected him to hit me, but he didn't.
"Do you understand what a mistake like this could cost you here?" His voice was quiet now, almost conversational, which somehow made it more terrifying. "The council is already questioning my judgment in allowing you to remain here. They see you as a liability, a rogue omega who will bring nothing but trouble and disruption."
"I know," I whispered. "I'm sorry, I—"
"I don't want your stupid apologies." He leaned forward slightly, and I had to force myself not to flinch back. "I want your assurance that this level of incompetence will not happen again."
The cracked glass of the portrait flashed through my mind. The knowledge of what I'd already done sat like a stone in my throat, choking me. I should tell him. I should confess right now, get it over with, face whatever punishment was coming.
But the words wouldn't come.
Looking into those gold eyes, seeing the barely restrained violence simmering just beneath his skin, remembering the blood and the bodies and the way he'd threatened to end Nora's suffering with his own hands, I couldn't make my mouth form the confession.
If I told him now, here, when he was already fighting for control after my public humiliation of him, what would he do? Would he have enough restraint to simply punish me? Or would the beast take over completely?
Terror made my mind go blank. White noise filled my ears, and my vision narrowed to just his face, those terrible eyes.
"I asked you a question, Dionne." My name in his mouth felt wrong, too intimate, too personal. "Can you assure me that you will not make this sort of mistake again?"
I nodded. The motion felt wooden, disconnected from my body, but I nodded.
"Use your ficking words." He seethed and I felt a shiver run up my spine.
"Yes." The word came out as barely more than a breath. "Yes, Your Grace. It won't happen again."
"See that it doesn't." He straightened in his chair, the movement making me flinch despite myself. "Get out of my sight."
I didn't need to be told twice. I scrambled to my feet, my legs shaking so badly I nearly fell twice. The tray, the scattered cups, everything was forgotten as I bolted for the door. My hands fumbled with the handle before finally getting it open, and then I was running.
The corridors blurred past me. I couldn't see through the tears streaming down my face, couldn't think past the panic clawing at my chest. My feet carried me without conscious direction, moving on pure instinct back toward the only place that felt even remotely safe.
The servants' quarters appeared ahead, and I stumbled through the door, my breath coming in harsh gasps that burned my throat.
"Dionne?" Violet's voice cut through the fog. "What happened? You look like you've seen a ghost."
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out. The words tangled on my tongue, too terrible to speak aloud. How could I tell her? How could I admit that I'd damaged something in the King's chambers, something that probably a lot to him?
And now I'd lied to his face. Stood there and promised not to make another mistake when I'd already made one far worse than spilled tea.
"Dionne, you're scaring me." Violet moved closer, her hand reaching for my arm. "Did something happen in the War chamber? Did someone hurt you?"
"No," I managed to choke out. "No, nothing like that. I just… I messed up. Spilled tea on the King."
Understanding dawned on Violet's face, quickly followed by sympathy. "Oh. Oh no. What did he do?"
"He was angry." The words felt inadequate, but they were all I could manage. "Really angry. And the council, they all laughed at me."
"That's awful." Violet pulled me into a hug, and I let myself collapse against her, my body shaking with silent sobs. "But hey, at least he didn't hurt you, right? That's something. And you'll get used to being around them. The Lycans, I mean. It gets easier with time."
If only that were all I had to worry about.
I pulled back from her embrace, wiping at my face with trembling hands. How many hours until he went back to his chambers? How long did I have before he discovered what I'd done?