"On the fourth day, God said: Let there be lights in the sky to separate day from night, and let them serve as signs to mark seasons, days, and years...
On the seventh day, having finished His work of creation, God blessed the seventh day and made it holy."
It was the weekend, and Mike was sitting with the Cooper family in the front row of the church, listening to Pastor Jeff's sermon.
This time, Pastor Jeff stuck carefully to reciting the original scripture, without adding any extra explanations.
Every now and then, his eyes darted toward little Sheldon in the front row, terrified the kid might hit him with another tough question.
Luckily, Sheldon stayed quiet the whole time—no disruptions.
"Alright, that's the end of today's service. But before we wrap up, I want to address a question from one of our young friends," Pastor Jeff said with a smile. "Sheldon~"
"Here," Sheldon stood up.
"About your question from last week—I checked with Bishop James, and now I can give you an answer." Pastor Jeff looked confident.
Clearly, he'd done his homework this time to take on Sheldon.
"I'm listening," Sheldon replied calmly.
After winning the debate last week, Sheldon hadn't planned on picking another fight in church.
But seeing that fired-up look in Pastor Jeff's eyes reignited his competitive streak.
"First off," Pastor Jeff began, tackling the leftover questions, "God isn't a ball of light—He created the balls of light...
As for the octopus aliens: God would appear to them in their own form, and since He's all-knowing, He'd understand and speak Octopus Alien language too."
"So, you satisfied with that, Sheldon?" Pastor Jeff asked.
These answers came straight from Bishop James, so he was feeling pretty smug about them.
They were consistent enough that Sheldon couldn't spot any obvious holes right away.
But never one to back down, Sheldon thought fast and said, "Good one, Pastor Jeff. But I've got another question..."
Since he couldn't poke holes in the old ones, he was ready to launch a new challenge.
The second he heard "another question," Pastor Jeff's confident smile froze. He cut him off quick: "Okay, service is officially over! If anybody's got more questions, save 'em for next week. Thanks~"
As the service ended, the congregation filed out.
Sheldon stood there, glaring at Pastor Jeff dodging the fight up on stage. "That's not fair—I didn't even get to ask!"
"Stop giving Pastor Jeff a hard time," Mary snapped at her youngest, dragging him toward the exit.
Meemaw stood up, glanced at Pastor Jeff, chuckled, and headed out too. A few steps later, she looked back at Mike still sitting there. "Mike, show's over. You coming?"
"You guys go ahead. I've got something to talk to Pastor Jeff about."
Today was the end of the one-week deadline. Mike had some ways to deal with the vampire now, but just to be safe, he wanted to see if the church had anything better.
Worst case, he'd just waste a little time—no big loss.
Once everyone cleared out, Mike walked up to the stage.
"Mike, I knew you'd show," Pastor Jeff said, pulling a small vial from his pocket. "You're in luck—Bishop James told me to give you this."
In the sunlight, the clear liquid inside glowed faintly, looking beautiful.
"Holy water?" Mike took it excitedly, examined it, then frowned. "Isn't this kinda... skimpy?"
The vial was tiny—maybe 10 milliliters, super delicate and cute.
"Ahem," Pastor Jeff fake-coughed, clearly thinking headquarters was being cheap too. But he defended it anyway: "It's holy water—super rare. Maybe you can dilute it...
Oh, and Bishop James wanted me to tell you: there are no such things as vampires in this world."
...
Mike just nodded along, not buying it for a second.
The vampire was literally living in this guy's house—she was basically screaming "I'm here!"
After saying goodbye, Mike tucked the vial close to his body and started thinking about how to use it to hurt the vampire the most.
Meanwhile, as Mike planned his vampire takedown, Serena was packing up to leave Medford.
She'd stayed way too long—her cover might already be blown.
If she hadn't promised Mike time to think, she'd have bolted days ago.
Time flew, and midnight rolled around.
Once the whole town was asleep, a red sports car pulled up outside Meemaw's house.
Before Serena could knock, Mike stepped out the door.
Under the moonlight, he wore a big trench coat with a long, narrow package slung across his back.
"Get in," Serena said curtly, leaning over.
Mike tightened the strap on his package and hopped in the back seat.
"Smart choice," Serena said, satisfied with how cooperative he was.
She started the engine and drove out of town. "You made the right call. In a bit, I'll give you the perfect First Embrace, turn you into a real vampire, and we'll head to Forks together..."
Soon, the car stopped in a small grove of trees.
Looked like this was where she planned to do the ritual.
They got out. Serena bared her fangs, staring at Mike's pale neck. She licked her lips greedily. "You know, Mike... you've got this unique scent that drives me crazy. I've been dying to taste your blood."
The First Embrace: the vampire drinks some of the human's blood first, then feeds them their own.
Turning into a vampire is a long, painful process for the human.
As Serena got closer, totally unguarded, Mike saw his opening.
In a flash, he splashed a bottle of highly corrosive aqua regia right in her face.
"You know what? You stink—like, unbearably!"
Getting the jump on her, Mike taunted while flinging open his coat and hurling every bottle and jar hidden inside at her.
Some had industrial alcohol, others gasoline.
"Bye-bye—don't let the door hit ya!"
While she clutched her face and howled, Mike pulled out a lighter.
This move? Classic: kick 'em while they're down!
As flames roared up, Mike grabbed his double-barreled shotgun and stood guard. He wasn't leaving till he saw that vampire burned to ash.
But amid her shrieks, black smoke suddenly poured from Serena's body.
The intense fire got snuffed out fast by the smoke.
"This works too?" Mike muttered, shocked. Figures—a vampire wouldn't go down that easy.
"Damn you, human—you betrayed me!" Serena raged, one eye burned blind by the acid. "I'll kill you! Drain every drop of your blood!!!"
For the first time in her 200+ years, this vampire felt actual murderous intent toward a human.
Hot or not—no mercy!
Pretty boy had to die!!
Seeing her fully fanged and closing in, Mike didn't hesitate—he pulled the trigger.
BOOM!
Sparks flew from the barrel.
But a shotgun that could drop an elephant barely fazed her.
She staggered back a couple steps, no fatal wound. The pain just fueled her fury more.
"Ahhh—I'll torture you a hundred times, then rip you apart!!"
Blinded by rage, her elegant face twisted into something monstrous.
Her ghostly speed gave Mike chills.
He backed up, reloading. "Hey, Serena... what if I say I've thought it over and wanna go to Forks with you after all? Still time?"
"Heh—pathetic human. I gave you chance after chance, and you blew them all..."
She lunged, snatched the shotgun, and twisted it into scrap metal with her bare hands. It clattered to the ground.
Then she slowed, stalking him step by step, savoring the fear and begging on his face.
"Don't come any closer!" Mike flailed his arms like a helpless lamb.
"Hahaha... I'm coming closer—what're you gonna do about it?" Serena cackled arrogantly.
Humans were fragile toys to a vampire.
Mike's pathetic act fed her twisted ego perfectly.
Cat toying with a mouse—nothing better.
"You forced my hand~"
In his "wild" flailing, Mike's right hand gripped the delicate little vial.
'Hope the church comes through...'
Seizing her moment of gloating, he uncorked it and splashed the scant holy water right into her mouth.
Like molten iron on snow, it spread across her face. Some trickled down her throat.
"Damn it—how do you have Vatican holy water...?" Serena writhed on the ground, voice hoarse and ragged.
She was shocked and furious.
If she'd known he had this trump card, she wouldn't have given him a single opening.
The holy water ate away at her; thick smoke rose as her strength faded bit by bit.
'This vampire's tough as hell...' Seeing she wasn't dead yet, Mike drew a kitchen knife from his coat, ready to move in.
Just then, a beefy off-road truck with high beams on pulled up outside the grove.
Two figures stepped out and walked toward them against the light.
"Church hunters—damn it..." Serena's one red eye made them out.
Before Mike could process, she dragged her weakened body up and staggered to her red sports car. "Mike, just you wait. You think the Church can protect you forever? Next time, I'll make you wish you were dead~"
Even half-dead, she croaked out a threat before peeling out.
Seeing her still mobile scared the crap out of Mike.
Big mistake!
If he'd walked up clueless, he shuddered to think what would've happened.
Right then, one of the backlit figures saw her trying to escape and raised a massive weapon.
Green energy gathered—a laser blast hit the sports car.
In the explosion, car and vampire turned to scrap.
'Holy crap—that entrance is badass. Total pros!' Watching the vampire get vaporized, Mike finally relaxed.
...
"Why'd you go straight to the portable cannon?"
"No choice—bosses weren't happy she got away last time..."
Chatting casually, the two walked past Mike.
After confirming the vampire was just slag with no signs of life, they came back over.
Mike got a good look: one in a white priest robe, the other a burly guy in a black suit.
The burly guy carried a high-tech triple-barreled monster—that's what fired the shot.
Both eyed Mike curiously.
The priestly one sniffed the air. "Smells like holy water. You're the kid who asked Jeff how to kill a vampire."
Mike nodded, but his eyes were on the black-suited guy.
That look—he knew it. Men in Black.
Seeing Mike's reaction, the priest smiled. "I'm Bishop James. Next, I'll baptize you and cleanse the bad vibes off you."
Before Mike could respond, Bishop James pulled out a 100ml bottle—higher purity holy water, glowing brighter.
Purity was obvious from the shine.
No time for Mike to complain—James dipped a drop and smeared it on his forehead.
"Cleansing bad luck" was the excuse; really checking if Mike was infected.
Church was thorough.
No bad reaction—Bishop James's smile turned genuine.
He nodded to the MIB guy; they shared a knowing look.
Then James turned away. The burly guy put on special shades and pulled a pen-like "neuralyzer" from his pocket.
It had three dials: hours, weeks, years.
He set the time. "Kid, look right here."
Blue flash.
He took off the shades. "All done, kid. Nothing happened tonight—no vampires, no explosions... Go home, get some sleep. Tomorrow's another beautiful day."
Yeah, he only wiped that night's memories.
Early neuralyzers had flaws—repeated use or wiping too much could mess with a normal person's brain.
Of course, it only worked on regulars.
As Mike shuffled blankly out of the grove, Bishop James eyed the car wreckage and rubbed his head. "How do we clean this up?"
The MIB didn't answer—just hoisted his triple plasma cannon and fired another laser.
Wreckage flattened—nothing left, not even ash.
"You black-ops guys are brutal," James said, half-shocked. Then: "Hey, you're coming with me back to town. I'm not totally trusting Jeff..."
Mentioning Pastor Jeff gave him another headache. A clergy member with a vampire right under his nose—and he never noticed?
Kinda embarrassing for the Church.
On the other side, as Mike emerged from the trees, his blank eyes blinked—then snapped back to normal.
"Let's see what goodies Serena left me..."
In his hand: a big white glowing orb—the drop from her death.
[Moon Essence (Trait): 1. Boosts combat power by 50% at night. 2. Absorbs moonlight to permanently strengthen physique.]
Basically a nighttime buff with growth potential—solid.
Mike absorbed the Moon Essence into his body and clapped his hands, satisfied.