Sure, there were a ton of perks to becoming a vampire, but Mike—with his system—couldn't care less about any of them.
He took a couple steps back, staying on guard, and said, "Thanks for the offer, but I'm not interested in turning into a vampire."
Selena looked genuinely surprised by his answer. Then, with a subtle hint of threat in her voice, she added, "Don't decide so quickly. You might end up regretting it...
How about a week? I'll give you one week to think it over."
Seeing there was some wiggle room, Mike let out a quiet sigh of relief.
"Fine, I'll give you my answer in a week," he said. He figured that'd buy him time to come up with other ways to handle Selena.
Things had gotten this far—what's the worst that could happen, right?
Watching Mike hurry away, Selena licked her lips and muttered under her breath, "He's definitely the man I had my eye on. He actually resisted my charm."
Truth is, she'd already activated her "Charm" ability that morning when she approached him. A normal person would've turned into a puppet driven by lust by now.
And giving him a week? That wasn't out of the goodness of her heart.
She'd already made up her mind: if he didn't give her a satisfying answer in a week, she wouldn't mind draining the blood of everyone in this little town.
Back in the Big Apple, she'd indulged in the delicious taste of fresh blood.
The unlucky ones she'd drained turned straight to ash. The "lucky" ones got infected with vampiric poison and became thralls.
Compared to pure-blooded vampires, thralls only got the long lifespan. Physically, they were even weaker than regular humans.
Plus, thralls couldn't survive sunlight—they were doomed to live in darkness forever.
Selena hadn't fed on the townsfolk before because she was worried the Church would track her down.
Now, she'd given Mike a choice. If he didn't make her happy, she had no problem punishing him by wiping out the whole town before she left.
As for just killing Mike outright? She couldn't bring herself to do it—who could destroy a face that handsome?
On the other side of things, Mike was walking down the road, soaking up the sunlight, finally feeling a bit better. That weird, twisted feeling in his head was completely gone.
Selena really was a vampire. Even knowing it for sure, Mike still felt like it was some kind of dream.
Shaking his head at his own "great luck," he headed toward the church to see if he could get any help there.
After all, when it comes to dealing with vampires, the Church is basically the pros.
The town's only church wasn't far from Grandma Connie's place.
Right then, Pastor Jeff was up front reading from the Bible.
Mike slipped in quietly through the main doors and sat in the back row, waiting for the service to end before talking to Jeff about vampires.
"On the first day of creation, God said: Let there be light! And there was light..." Pastor Jeff was preaching about the greatness of God's creation.
In the third row, little Sheldon—who was still salty about his last unpleasant "encounter" with God—was hunting for holes in Jeff's sermon.
The second he heard "light," Sheldon shot his hand up.
"Very good, Sheldon. Do you have a question?" Jeff called on him, though his smile hid the fact that he really didn't want to.
"Pastor Jeff, as far as I know, God didn't create light until the fourth day," Sheldon said. "So were the first three days just total darkness?"
"It wasn't like that..." Jeff tried to explain. "God brings light to the world."
"Okay, so then God is a photon?" Sheldon pressed.
"Yes... wait, no! God is God. He's not any 'thing,'" Jeff almost got tripped up.
To believers, God is everywhere—a matter of faith, not something you can pin down to physical stuff.
And when it came to physics? Jeff was no match for little Sheldon.
Seeing Jeff about to crash and burn, Grandma Connie grinned from the sidelines. "Oh boy, Jeff's in for it now."
Mary shot her mom a dirty look, then tugged on Sheldon to get him to stop.
But Sheldon wasn't letting this opportunity slip. He switched topics and kept going: "Pastor Jeff, I read in the Gospels that 'God so loved the world.' Does 'the world' here mean just people on Earth, or the whole universe? Would that include octopus aliens from some far-off planet?"
Clearly, Sheldon had done his homework this time to get a little revenge.
"Uh..."
Faced with Sheldon's twisted logic, Jeff thought for a moment and said, "God is all-powerful, so of course He'd protect octopus aliens too—whether they believe in Him or not."
Here, Jeff was subtly pointing out that Sheldon didn't believe, while generously saying God would still watch over him anyway.
"Very good," Sheldon nodded, then kept pushing: "So what form would God appear in to the octopus aliens? I mean, a creature with eight tentacles probably wouldn't vibe with a human-looking God who only has four limbs. And does God speak Octopus Alien language?"
"This..." Jeff didn't dare make stuff up about God's appearance. His brain froze, and he just stood there awkwardly.
There were over a hundred people in the church. Some were looking at Jeff, waiting for his answer. Others glared at Sheldon like he was asking for trouble.
Mary knew Sheldon's antics were basically blasphemous at this point.
She quickly tugged George's sleeve and whispered, "Fake being sick—we need to get out of here..."
If they didn't leave soon, the congregation might come after Sheldon themselves.
George got the hint, clutched his chest, and put on a pained face.
"Oh no, George, what's wrong?" Mary hammed it up dramatically. "We need to get to the hospital!"
She helped him toward the door, kicking little Georgie awake on the way—he'd been snoring and drooling through the whole thing.
Connie, seeing trouble brewing, woke up Missy from her nap too. Then she grabbed Missy and a very reluctant Sheldon and followed Mary out.
Once the chaos was over, Pastor Jeff's head was still spinning with octopus aliens. He had zero interest in finishing the Bible reading.
So, not long after the Coopers left, the service wrapped up early.
After everyone filed out, Mike walked up. "Pastor Jeff, I need your help with something."
"If I remember right, you're Mike—the one staying with Connie's family..." Jeff recognized him. Seeing Mike show up in his pajamas, Jeff chuckled and said, "I think God's already feeling your enthusiasm."
Even knowing demons and vampires were real, Mike still wasn't a believer. But he didn't bother explaining that. He just cut to the chase: "Pastor Jeff, do you know if God's got any ways to deal with vampires?"
Hearing yet another weird question, Jeff's smile froze. He patiently explained, "As far as I know, vampires don't exist."
Figures he wouldn't know, Mike thought, a little disappointed. But he kept going: "Why not? If you believe God exists, then the opposite should too—like demons, or vampires."
"Okay, fine," Jeff said, getting a bit dizzy from the logic. "Even if demons exist, God would've subdued them all already. You don't need to worry."
"But what if some got missed?" Mike pressed. "Like a vampire that slipped through the cracks—what would God do about them?"
"Uh, probably holy water, or staking them through the heart with a wooden stake!" Jeff went along with it.
"So, could you hook me up with some holy water? Or a stick that could pierce a vampire's heart?"
Jeff had never heard a request like this in his life.
It was way too much to ask. "Sorry, I don't have anything like that here."
"Could you at least ask around the Church for me? See if anyone higher up has stuff for dealing with vampires?"
Seeing the hopeful look on Mike's face, Jeff thought it was ridiculous but couldn't say no. "Alright, I'll call the bishop and ask. I'll let you know if I hear anything."
(He was also planning to ask the bishop about those octopus aliens while he was at it.)
Mike reminded him to follow up quickly, then finally headed out of the church.