Another five months later…
"There he is. My engaged best friend," I said, going in for a hug the moment Kenny reached the bar. "First you move out and now this. They grow up so fast. Congratulations, Ken. We miss you back at the apartment."
"No you don't," said Kenny, returning my hug before sitting next to me at the bar.
"No we don't, but Stacy said I had to say so. She says hi and congratulations. We're really happy for you and Marlene. So when's the big day?" I asked, excited for my friend.
"I don't know yet. It just happened. When I do though, you'll be the first to know as my best man," Kenny said, flying high.
He was so happy, it was absolutely infectious.
"Don't people traditionally ask if someone wants to be their best man instead of just assuming?" I said with a laugh.
"I don't care. I put up with you and Stacy making eyes at each other for the last five months every morning. And that wasn't even the worst of it. I was the last to find out about you two. You owe me. You're doing this," he said with a laugh of his own.
"Okay one, you were the second, followed by Marlene who guessed. Two, that's completely on you. Stacy is not quiet in bed, so I don't know how you managed not to figure it out. Three, I'd be honored," I said, and we picked up the drinks I had ordered for us before he got here and clinked bottles.
"We are not talking about the weird sex noises I heard coming from your bedroom that first month. I figured you crossed into a new area of creepy intimacy, like watching porn together or something. Not actual sex. Needless to say, I needed noise cancelling headphones," said Kenny, cringing.
"Sorry Ken," I said, laughing.
"You should be. So how is she? Does she want to kill you yet because you can't keep the sink dishes free? Can't imagine that's going over well now that it's just the two of you. Six months is a long time, especially for you," said Kenny, taking a sip of his beer.
Had it really been six months? It felt like just yesterday when Kenny broadcast our first kiss on live TV. Now I didn't just see her everywhere like some emotionally induced hallucination. She really was everywhere. Her clothes in the dryer, her shampoo in the bathroom, her books always taking up space on the coffee table, her scent on the pillow next to mine.
"She's amazing and yes, she regularly threatens to murder me for not packing the dishwasher. Trying to remember when it's my turn," I said, taking my wallet out to look at the frayed first photo I ever took of her. "The semester just ended. I'm taking her to Vermont for a week. She's earned it."
"Solid six month anniversary gift. I should steal that. Marlene and I haven't gotten each other gifts for ours yet," Kenny said, nodding approvingly. "You're a good boyfriend, Scott. At least to her. About time you got it right."
"You got Marlene a rock. I think you're good for a while," I said, ignoring the anxiety that went through me when people referred to Stacy and I as a couple.
Apparently I wasn't subtle enough, because Kenny called me out, saying, "You're not still doing the whole no labels crap, are you? Dammit Scott. You're sleeping together. You live together. Your mom and sister call her twice a week. Not you, her. If she's not your girlfriend, what is this? Friends with benefits?"
"Of course not. Don't talk about her like that," I said, taking a long gulp of my beer. "That's fucking gross. You know she'll never be just a lay. She's—" Here I faltered.
I still couldn't shake the feeling that Stacy would end up being like the women that came before her. The very idea of me being capable of treating her like I don't give two fucks if she existed or not made me want to crumble. My whole world was making her happy. Existing for her.
"Your girlfriend, Scott. She's your girlfriend," Kenny said twice.
"Shit. She's my girlfriend," I admitted for the first time.
As I leaned into it, I found it wasn't the worst thing. In fact, I rather liked it. My heart sped up and I felt sick to my stomach, emotions overwhelming my system, but I liked it.
The essence of her was all around me and I could think of nothing but her and how perfectly she fit with me. Not my fucked up relationship with my dad. Not the ways in which I had let her down by making her wait for me. My imperfections paled in comparison to the visions I suddenly had of our future together.
A hard dose of reality hit me in the gut when the idea of our future took shape in my head and my mind spiralled.
"Of course she is, buddy. If she doesn't know it already, it's high time you tell her," said Kenny, patting me on the back. "She won't wait forever, Scott."
"I'm going to make her miserable. That's literally my biggest fear," I said, breathing deeply.
"Last week you had a UTI because you guys can't stop humping like rabbits," Kenny said, putting his hand on my shoulder. "And she never left your side."
"She thought it was hilarious. She was so proud of us," I said with a chuckle.
"And three months after the wake, when she would come home drenched in sweat because she thought someone sent by her dad was following her, what did you do?" Kenny asked.
"I called my dad and begged him to have someone look after her when she went to campus and I couldn't be there. We ended up getting help from my dad's ex partner, Frankie," I said, remembering how I would have done anything to ease her fear, even call my dad.
"And that must have cost a small fortune. You're in this, Scott. You've been in this for six months and you're both happy. For the first time since I've known you, you've been showing up for a girl that's not related to you. So get over yourself, go home and label the shit out your relationship. Then enjoy your anniversary man," Kenny said, finishing his beer and shaking his head. "And say hi back for me."
"Okay," I said, adrenaline pumping through my veins. "I'm going, right after I finish this beer," I said, already halfway off my stool when I remembered why I was here and sat back down.
"Just go. Go," Kenny insisted when I failed to move. "You better name your first born after me for this," he called after me as I ran out the door.
I stopped by a street vendor on my way home to pick up a bouquet of Water Lilies, her favorite flowers. Excitement and anticipation flooded my senses, the world seeming brighter and more colorful. I was in such a hurry to get to her that when I finally made it to our apartment building, I took the stairs two at a time to get to our floor faster.
"I'm home. Kenny says hi," I called out, my voice dying in my throat as I stepped through the door.
At my feet was the start of a trail of rose petals, leading through the kitchen and into the living room. I followed it with a stupid smile on my face. The living room was flooded with burning candles. There, in the middle of it all, stood my girl in nothing but a black two piece lingerie set.
"Happy six months," she said, her hands behind her back, her tell that she was nervous.
"My life rocks," I said, running my fingers through my hair as I made my way to her, flowers in hand.
She let out a string of giggles.
"You like?" she asked, accepting the flowers from me.
"I love," I said, taking her hand to draw her close and kiss her temple.
"I didn't think you were into this kind of thing. I didn't think you'd remember," she confessed to my chest.
"Six months ago today I had the best sex of my life with the girl of my dreams and my whole life changed. Of course I remember. And to prove that I'm not lying," I said, twirling her around and around. "I got you something."
"The flowers are beautiful," she said, beaming like she had no expectations.
It stung. I never wanted her not to expect things from me ever again. I wanted her to depend on me. To see her whole life with me, like I was now doing with her. When we got back from Vermont, I planned to take her home to meet my mom. Yes, I had decided that last part just two minutes ago when I walked through the door and saw her waiting for me. So
what? The thought of her being the girl I took home to meet my family brought me peace.