The final class of the day was Defense Against the Dark Arts—that is, Gilderoy Lockhart's lesson.
"Good afternoon, children!"
When Lockhart strode into the classroom, everyone was startled to see that his hair was a mess, his robes were rumpled, dust clung to his shoulders and sleeves, and even the wand in his pocket was stuck in at a crooked angle.
"Ahem—no need to be concerned," he said cheerfully. "I've just finished helping the second-years deal with a small problem…"
He smiled with effortless confidence and puffed out his chest, completely unfazed by the curious looks. Then his gaze swept across the room—and when he saw that every desk was stacked high with his own books, his grin grew even wider, revealing eight gleaming white teeth.
"I, Gilderoy Lockhart,"he announced grandly, as though his disheveled appearance were a badge of honor,"Order of Merlin, Third Class; Honorary Member of the Dark Arts Defense League; five-time winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile Award. I imagine most of you have heard my name, and perhaps even read my books… Well? What did you think?"
"They were amazing, Professor!"a student immediately shouted. "Could I get your autograph?"
"Of course, of course! My office is always open to my most devoted admirers," Lockhart said magnanimously. "But before we begin, let's take attendance… um…"
"Ken?"
He looked up, puzzled. "Is that… a name?"
"Present—it's me, Professor," Avada replied reluctantly, raising his hand.
"No surname?" Lockhart frowned. Then his eyes lit up. "Wait, I know you! You're the one who helped defeat You-Know-Who alongside the famous Harry Potter! A pleasure, a pleasure indeed!"
He leapt down from the podium at once and seized Avada's hand, shaking it vigorously. "Why, just this morning I took a photograph with Harry Potter himself. Perhaps someday the two of us can exchange experiences! Merlin, achieving such feats at your age—your fame may rival mine someday. You'll find yourself needing to carry a pen and a stack of photographs wherever you go!"
"Thank you for the compliment, Professor,"Avada replied politely.
Looks like the student roster still doesn't have my full name, he thought. Good thing, too. Otherwise this guy might not even know the incantation for the Killing Curse—and might shout 'Avada Kedavra' right in front of the whole class…
After finishing roll call and confirming that everyone was present, Lockhart nodded with satisfaction.
"Well then, since we have such a young hero among us, I suppose I'll have to revise the little quiz I prepared…" He tapped his chin thoughtfully. "Now, third-year Defense Against the Dark Arts primarily focuses on understanding Dark creatures—their identification, countermeasures, and the treatment of injuries they cause. Correct?"
"In that case, my dear students, Professor Lockhart has prepared a severe challenge for you! I hope you're mentally prepared!"
The atmosphere in the classroom instantly grew tense, sharp breaths audible throughout the room.
"But don't be too alarmed,"Lockhart said with a smug smile, clearly enjoying their reactions."As long as you apply the knowledge I've so generously shared in my books, this challenge will pose no real danger to you…"
"Now then—"
He bent down and hauled a large cage covered with a cloth up onto the desk.
"Be on your guard! You are about to face the most terrifying creatures known to the magical world. But remember—if you've studied my works carefully, you'll overcome them with ease!"
"The second-years suffered greatly at their hands just earlier today. Fortunately, under my protection, they avoided injury. Now it's your turn. This is a test of your courage and reflexes…"
The entire class held its breath. Lockhart placed one hand on the cage—yet his body was already inching backward.
"To ensure you don't become overly dependent on me and fail to display your true abilities, I shall leave the classroom once they are released and allow you to handle the situation on your own," he declared solemnly. "But fear not—if you face mortal danger, I will charge in at once to protect you. Nothing will go wrong."
"Now then—let's see how you deal with these vile creatures!"
With that, Lockhart whipped the cloth off the cage and immediately bolted like a startled rabbit—whoosh!—vanishing from the classroom in an instant. The door slammed shut behind him with a loud bang, leaving only the students—wands already drawn—standing in tense readiness.
From the now-uncovered cage emerged the long-imprisoned "terrifying creatures."
They were iron-blue, squat little beings, roughly eight inches tall, with sharp little faces and voices so shrill they sounded like a flock of budgerigars screeching all at once. Wings sprouted from their backs, buzzing loudly like insects as they fluttered about.
The students stared at one another, each seeing the same expression of utter disbelief reflected in the others' eyes.
"Uh… if I'm not mistaken,"someone said hesitantly,"those are… Cornwall pixies?"
"That's right—Cornwall pixies. But weren't these supposed to be the most evil creatures imaginable? I thought Professor Lockhart had borrowed what was left of You-Know-Who's soul from Dumbledore!"
"That'd be absurd…"
"I get it now!" someone exclaimed. "Professor Lockhart must be deliberately exaggerating the danger to temper our courage and draw out our potential!"
"So that's it!"The realization spread rapidly through the room.
"In that case, everyone—"the girl who had spoken leapt onto a desk,"to prove our bravery to Professor Lockhart, and to avoid disappointing him, we must deal with these creatures with the utmost seriousness and show him our finest performance!"
"Yeah!"The class erupted in agreement. Everyone wanted to stand out—to earn the admiration of the great Defense Against the Dark Arts master.
"Take them down!"
A storm of curses immediately poured toward the Cornwall pixies, who hadn't yet figured out what was happening.
Avada: …
To be honest, the overall Defense Against the Dark Arts level of their year really was no joke. Despite the revolving door of professors, their first-year teacher had been a top-tier master who excelled at instruction; their second-year "professor" had been Voldemort's vessel—which, all things considered, was practically the Dark Lord himself giving lessons. That foundation had left them exceptionally well trained.
Hopefully the pixies will be alright, Avada thought. Other year groups still need to use these poor things for class…
…
"Haah… haah…"
In an empty classroom a few meters away from the Defense Against the Dark Arts room, Lockhart finally managed to steady his trembling legs and catch his breath.
They'll be tormented just like the second-years were,he thought smugly.And once those wretched pixies fly out the windows, I'll stroll back in, scold them for their lack of skill and poor study habits. Then they'll admire me even more—and pore over my books word by word, memorizing every line. Heh heh…
"Professor? Professor?"
A student's head suddenly poked into the room, nearly giving Lockhart a heart attack.
"What are you doing here?!" Lockhart snapped, forcing his face into a stern scowl. "Unless lives are at risk, I will not intervene! This is training! You students are truly—"
"Uh… sir,"the student interrupted, baffled."I just wanted to ask… Professor, why did you run off here? We've already dealt with the pixies. We've been waiting for you for almost five minutes."
As he spoke, the student dragged the cage inside. Inside it lay a chaotic pile of unconscious pixies—some charred black, some coated in frost, some foaming at the mouth, and others missing wings or limbs altogether.
Lockhart shuddered.
(End of Chapter)