I cocked my head towards Tatsumi, as my eyes forcibly crinkled. I couldn't show him how I was feeling; any girl in love would've felt the same. It was only natural...Right?
"So... What's the verdict?"
Tatsumi's head turned as he met my gaze. In that moment, his head tilted.
"W-what do you mean by the verdict?"
My face began to flush as my cheeks puffed out. He was either feigning innocence or he was just dense; knowing Tatsumi, he was probably the latter.
"You know... About all this? Are you really alright keeping things the way they are? Between you and Akio, I mean.
Tatsumi's hand was planted under his chin, and to be fair, I didn't blame him. It was a big ask, and I probably stepped over boundaries doing so, but even then, it didn't sit right with me. I can't speak for Akio, but I knew Tatsumi was hurting; long-distance does that to people. I hate it. The longing that comes with being far apart is unbearable. It wasn't fair for both of them to be hurting like they were.
Tatsumi's brow furrowed.
"I... don't know, as much as I love Akio, this long-distance thing never really sat right with me either if I'm honest."
As expected of Tatsumi, as much as he tried to put on a brave face, when it came to Akio, it was a different story.
Akio's lucky to have someone like him. I wish I had someone like that.
My voice steadied.
"Well, why don't you go see her? Just because your long distance doesn't mean you can't save up and go and see her? Actually, while we're at it, why don't you at least text her? I'm sure she's wondering why you haven't spoken in ages."
In that moment, Tatsumi grimaced. Knowing him, I bet the thought never even crossed his mind. Seriously, he could be such an idiot when the time counted for it.
"Why? Uh... I guess it was never really our thing. That being said, we did call that one time. I would love to go visit her, really, I would, but I can't just drop everything here behind. "
Tatsumi's eyes met the ground that lay beneath him.
His voice softened.
"...Even if I did want to go see her, our promise wouldn't be fulfilled."
I turned my head and caught his gaze.
"Aww, is someone embarrassed?"
Tatsumi's voice steadied as his head lifted.
"I thought you said you were going to stop that?"
I gave a light jerk of my shoulders.
"Ugh, I was just trying to lighten the mood. I hate when you self-depricate like that, it's annoying."
Let's be real, this was my way of trying to comfort him. Although one fact was true. I hated it when he was hard on himself. I feel like when he's like that, I can't do anything for him, and that thought. Well, it's terrifying.
"Anyway, what's this 'promise' between you two? It's been bugging me for a while."
There I went, putting my nose where it doesn't belong. I tended to do that.
Tatsumi's lip curled. What was he getting happy about?
"Well...we kinda promised to get married when we both achieved our goals. You're the only one I'm telling this to, to be frank, I don't even know why I'm telling you."
WHAT? Marriage, at this age? Jeez, how committed are these two? I was envious if anything. It must be a beautiful thing, love.
I just wish... I could find my own-
"Anyway, enough about me. The bigger question is how YOU are. After all, you told me you like me, knowing full well what the deal was. Seriously, how are you still able to act so calmly?"
Tatsumi's gaze was like my salvation, no matter if I was with him or not, even if he'd acknowledge how I felt, that was enough for me. With that being said, a part of me was heartbroken, obviously. Actually, I was coloured more bittersweet than anything else.
My eyes crinkled.
"I'm not calm, far from it. If you want to put a label on it, I guess you could say I'm heartbroken."
"Way to lay it on thick."
Tatsumi jerked his shoulders slightly, a failed attempt at a joke.
"But even if I am, just knowing you heard me out is good enough for me. It makes me happy to know you at least acknowledged how I felt."
Even if I was hurting, that was fine. Tatsumi and I will start over.
Tatsumi's eyes lit up, the same warmth that was there from before, reared its head once again.
"Never took for the sappy type. But, if I'm honest, I like you this way better than how you were before."
"If I'm honest, if you kept that gig up, I would've probably started to hate you - more than I already did."
Those harsh words, although a bit too on the nose, gave me comfort. This was our dynamic, and although I would never admit it, I liked us better like this.
"..."
"Tatsumi... let's start from zero!"
The room... You could hear a pindrop.
It felt like years before any of us dared to move. Was he going to accept what I had said? Of course, I didn't expect him to fully trust me right away, but a start is always the first step.
"..."
Tatsumi nodded before redirecting his gaze elsewhere.
"Ju-just so you know, I don't fully forgive you or anything. It'll take a while for that trust to build back up, y'know?"
A heartfelt smile ran across my face.
"Mhm, thank you, Tatsumi."
I knew that would be the outcome. I was really happy with it, if I'm being honest. A girl like me...getting a second chance? It's almost unheard of. I was so lucky to have met Tatsumi, and as much as I hated to admit it, Akio too. I mean, she was the one who helped me, stayed by him, when noone else did.
You have to at least give her praise for that.