Chapter 15: The Third Meeting and the Children
The exhaustion was catching up.
Four hours of sleep. Maybe. The rest spent in the undercroft, memorizing passages, watching shadows, jumping at every sound. My body could take it—adaptive resistance made me harder to break than normal men—but the mental strain was building.
I almost didn't go to the godswood. Almost convinced myself that one missed meeting wouldn't matter.
But I'd promised. Every third day.
So I went.
Helaena wasn't alone.
Two small figures darted around the weirwood tree. Children. Silver-white hair catching the sunlight, laughing and shrieking with the kind of pure joy that felt alien in this place.
The twins. Jaehaerys and Jaehaera.
I stopped at the entrance, suddenly uncertain. This wasn't the plan. Meeting Helaena in private was one thing. Meeting her children—
Helaena saw me. Rose from where she'd been sitting, watching her children play. Walked over with that strange, floating gait.
"You came." She sounded relieved. Like she'd thought I wouldn't.
"I said I would."
"This is Ulf." She called to the children without looking away from me. "He listens."
The boy—Jaehaerys—stopped chasing a butterfly and turned. Studied me with the intense focus only children could manage. Then he ran over, skidding to a halt just close enough to be bold, far enough to retreat if needed.
"Are you a knight?" His voice was high, excited.
I knelt, bringing myself to his eye level. "No."
"But you fight. Mother said you fight."
"I do."
"Then why aren't you a knight?"
"Because I protect people anyway. Don't need fancy armor and a title to do that."
He considered this with the seriousness of someone who'd never questioned the world's hierarchies before. "Can you teach me?"
"Jaehaerys—" Helaena started.
"Just footwork," I said quickly. "Nothing dangerous. Basic defensive stance."
The boy's face lit up. "Yes!"
I showed him how to stand. Feet shoulder-width apart, knees slightly bent, weight balanced. Nothing that could hurt him. Just the foundation.
He mimicked me, wobbling slightly. Corrected his stance when I adjusted his feet. Grinned like he'd accomplished something monumental.
"Like this?"
"Exactly like that."
The girl—Jaehaera—had approached while I wasn't looking. She stood a meter away, watching with those too-old eyes that reminded me uncomfortably of her mother.
"You have sad eyes," she said.
I blinked. Didn't know how to respond to that.
"Jaehaera," Helaena murmured. "That's rude."
"It's true though." The girl tilted her head. Same motion as her mother. "Why are your hands bandaged?"
I held up my hands, wrapped in cloth that hid the burns from fire training. "Training."
"Does it hurt?"
"Yes."
"Then why do you do it?"
I glanced at Helaena. She was watching me with an expression I couldn't quite read. Something between hope and fear.
"Because people I care about need someone strong," I said quietly. "And I'd rather hurt now than watch them hurt later."
Jaehaera nodded, solemn as a septa. Then she returned to her pebbles, arranging them in patterns only she understood.
Helaena's eyes were wet. She turned away quickly, pretending to watch Jaehaerys practice his stance.
Septa Teora and a nursemaid sat on a distant bench, giving us space but keeping watch. Proper. Appropriate. Monitoring the strange man with the royal children.
I didn't care. Let them watch.
Jaehaerys wanted to learn more. I showed him how to dodge—nothing fancy, just stepping to the side when someone swung at him. Turned it into a game. He laughed, dancing around my slow-motion punches.
"You're too slow!" he crowed.
"I'm old. You're fast."
"I'm the fastest!"
Jaehaera looked up from her pebbles. "He's not the fastest. Dreamfyre is the fastest."
"Dreamfyre is a dragon," Jaehaerys protested.
"Still faster than you."
They bickered. Normal childhood argument, meaningless and perfect.
And all I could think was: In another timeline, these children die screaming. Blood and Cheese cut off Jaehaerys's head while Helaena watches. Jaehaera goes mad from trauma.
My hands clenched into fists.
"Are you angry?" Jaehaera asked, noticing.
"No. Just... thinking."
"About what?"
About killing two men to keep you alive. About becoming a monster so you don't have to.
"About how to keep you safe," I said instead.
She studied me for a long moment. Then she picked up a smooth pebble, walked over, and placed it in my palm.
"This one's for you. It's strong. See?" She pointed at the pebble's dark veins. "It won't break."
I closed my fingers around it. "Thank you."
"You're welcome." She went back to her patterns.
Helaena sat down beside me on the grass. Close enough that our shoulders almost touched.
"They like you," she whispered.
"I like them."
"Most people don't. They think Jaehaera is strange, like me. And Jaehaerys is too wild, too loud." Her voice was tight. "Even their father doesn't—" She stopped.
I didn't need her to finish. Aegon. The drunk prince who would one day be a worse king. Who treated his own children like inconveniences.
"The dreams are getting worse," Helaena said suddenly. "Fire. Blood. Screaming. And the beast—it finds them. Always finds them." Her voice cracked. "I see Jaehaerys's face. He's crying. Calling for me. And I can't—I can't—"
I took her hand. She gripped it so hard her knuckles went white.
"I'm watching the passages," I said quietly. "The secret ones beneath the Keep. I've found one of the beast's heads. The ratcatcher. Cheese. I'm hunting the other."
"You'll kill them." Not a question.
"Yes."
"When?"
"Before they can hurt anyone. Before the beast fully forms."
She leaned against my shoulder. Just for a moment. Septa Teora made a disapproving noise from her bench.
Helaena pulled away quickly, but her hand stayed in mine.
"Don't die for them," she whispered. "Please. The dreams show you burning. Standing in fire. I don't—I can't lose you too."
Too. Like she's already lost so much.
"I won't die," I said. "I'll live. For you. For them. For however long it takes."
Jaehaerys ran over, breathless from his game. "Can you teach me more tomorrow?"
"I can't come tomorrow. But in three days, yes."
"Three whole days?" He looked devastated.
"Time passes quickly when you're playing," I said.
He considered this, then nodded. "Okay. Three days. Don't forget!"
"I won't."
Septa Teora stood. "Princess. The children need their afternoon lessons."
Helaena released my hand reluctantly. "Three days," she echoed.
"Three days."
I watched them leave. Jaehaerys skipping ahead. Jaehaera walking carefully, still holding two pebbles. Helaena following, looking back once before they disappeared through the entrance.
I sat alone beneath the weirwood, Jaehaera's pebble in my palm.
These aren't just names in a story. They're real. Alive. Fragile.
And Blood and Cheese wanted to take that away.
Not while I still breathed.
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