Something broke in Luciene's eyes. But it was not like glass shattering loudly. It was more like a suppressed crack quietly deepening.
After my words, she did not step back. She did not shout. Her face did not even tense. She simply held her breath. For a moment. So brief that you would not notice unless you were watching carefully. But I noticed.
Because in that moment, two emotions inside Luciene collided.
Jealousy and fear.
And fear won.
Her gaze slid to my lips, then to my shoulders, then back to my eyes. As if she needed to confirm that the person standing before her was still me. She took a step back. Not to create distance. To keep herself from falling.
"I understand," she finally said.
One word.
But it was not the right one.
Her tone was calm. Too calm. Normally, she would say such sentences with sarcasm, sharpness, or a resentment she could not fully conceal. Now, her voice was flat, like a polished surface. There was no emotion. Or rather, emotion had been locked away.
"This is your life," she continued. "Who you grow close to, who you do not… those are not things I can decide."
She paused. Looked away. Through the window, toward the morning light. When it hit her face, the green in her eyes faded.
"It's not my place."
That sentence was a punishment she delivered to herself.
I moved closer. Deliberately slow. I did not want to corner her. But I did not want to leave her completely alone either. I stopped when there was an arm's length between us.
"Luciene," I said.
At the sound of her name, her shoulders tensed slightly. But she did not look at me.
"As long as you do not ask anything of me," she said, "everything is fine."
It was a lie.
We both knew it.
But she chose that lie. Because there was another option, and that option was losing Aurelius. Losing me. That possibility was heavy enough to suppress all the anger inside her.
Silence fell. Then she turned her back and left the room without another word.
Frankly, it went better than I expected. Luciene was beginning to take shape exactly as I wanted. She would probably go to her room now, cry, maybe even have a breakdown and punch her pillow. But at some point, she would calm down. And at that point, the fear of losing me would take over. Or at least, that is what I hope.
Looking back now, there were only two women in my life, and both consumed more of my time than they should have. I must not forget my purpose. I need to grow stronger. And then stronger still. That means extending the time I spend training. My growth was fast, but not enough. If necessary, I should push myself all day and refine my swordsmanship further.
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A Few Months Later
A few months, from the outside, looked like a single line. But when filled in, it was not a line at all. It was pressure, layered upon layer.
During that time, I grew closer to Baroness Catherinne. But that closeness was not rushed. Sitting side by side, long conversations, sometimes hours of silence. A strange balance formed, one where we enjoyed each other's presence. She was never demanding, and I never pushed boundaries. This did not heighten the tension between us. On the contrary, it made it more controlled, more deliberate.
When Catherinne spoke, I listened carefully. She talked about politics, her past, her responsibilities. Sometimes a sentence would trail off and her eyes would drift into the distance.
My relationship with Luciene, however, evolved in a completely different direction.
The bed was no longer merely a place of intimacy for her. It was confirmation of safety. A place where she could prove to herself that she still had me, that she had not lost me. Over time, she learned not to hide this. She asked no questions and drew no boundaries. The looks that once trembled with jealousy gradually turned into a cautious acceptance.
The truth that I, Aurelius, would never belong to a single woman settled quietly inside her.
That acceptance did not weaken her. On the contrary, it made her more careful. She spoke less and listened more. To avoid losing me, she gave up not her anger, but her expectations. From the outside, this looked like maturity. But I knew better. It was obsession, merely changing its shape.
As for me, emotions occupied only a small portion of my day.
My true focus had not changed.
Every day.
Without exception.
The sword.
I began training in the mornings while my muscles were still half asleep. First the basic stances, then repetitions. Thousands of the same strike. The same angle. The same step. Not until muscle memory formed, but until muscle memory refused to make mistakes.
I consumed physical enhancement potions without a second thought. Pain had become a familiar companion. My knees no longer gave out like they did in the beginning, but each time, something wove itself tighter deep within my muscles. My strength was no longer explosive. It was condensed.
As the days passed, my reflection in the mirror changed. Broader shoulders. A calmer posture. Even when I was still, my body remained alert. When I held the sword, I was no longer directing it. It understood my intent.
After a month, I realized something clearly. I was not just growing stronger. I was narrowing myself. There were no unnecessary gaps left in my life. People, emotions, relationships, all of them knew their place.
And now, it was time to embark on my final adventure before moving on to the next step.
It was time to use the knowledge I had read in the novel for my own benefit. What I planned to do might attract the attention of some gods. Or it might not. It did not matter. I would simply become a bit stronger by chance, nothing more. It was not something important enough to interrupt anyone or demand their attention.
I was back in the city now. This time, alone. Luciene continued to grow stronger each day, and she was probably already at a level where she could easily enter the academy. But this time, she would only slow me down.
She wanted to come at first, but after I clearly told her I did not want her to and promised I would return, she accepted it quietly. Looking back at the person she had become now, she was so far removed from her version in the novel. Normally headstrong, stubborn, and spoiled, she had become far more mature and understanding. She was young, and even without me she would have matured eventually. But the fact that it happened this quickly benefited us both.
As for why I came to the city. It was for preparation. For days, I spent a fortune on potions, scrolls, and other useful items. Not just for this adventure, but also to use later at the academy.
I negotiated meticulously.
I spent long hours in potion shops. Most of the merchants recognized me by now. Some offered discounts, others tried to raise prices, assuming I was young and inexperienced. I handled all of them with patience. I bought enough from each. No excess. No waste.
Scrolls were more difficult.
I was nearly building a collection of scrolls that ordinary adventurers might see only once in their lifetime. My coins melted away. But in return, my margin for error narrowed.
And most importantly…
The map.
A place described in the novel in just a few lines, dismissed as an "insignificant side event." If I had not paid attention while reading, I would have missed it entirely. That was why I truly needed a map this time, and extra scrolls as insurance in case I got lost.
As for the reason behind all this preparation.
I was going to the infamous Black Forest.
The outer edges of the Black Forest were used by strong individuals for training and gaining experience, but most hesitated to venture deeper. I, on the other hand, intended to go straight to its heart.
That was why my preparations were so thorough.
The Black Forest did not demand strength alone. It demanded patience, awareness, and the composure to pay the price for wrong decisions. Its monsters were powerful, yes, but that was not the true danger. The forest could smell weakness. Greed. Haste. Those who believed themselves greater than they truly were.
The Black Forest had become the grave of countless warriors and mages. I had no intention of carving out another grave for myself.
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Author's note: I have seen that many readers complain about romance taking up too much space in the story, and for that reason I realized I needed to change the progression I had planned in my mind. My original intention was to use romance as a tool for the protagonist's character development. Now that I am changing the direction of the story, I believe there is no harm in explaining this openly.
Aurelius (MC) was originally meant to grow increasingly closer to Luciene and especially Baroness Catherine, gradually distancing himself from the idea of becoming a villain. At that exact point, my plan was to kill the two women, or do something similar, in order to inflict a severe trauma on the protagonist. Through that trauma, the main character, who had chosen and then abandoned the path of villainy, would be pushed back toward becoming a villain, or at least that was the outline of my plan. In short, it would be a story about someone forced to be the villain, not someone who chose to be the villain.
However, I am now discarding this plan entirely. From this point forward, there will be significantly less romance in the story. More action and empowerment. Let's see if I can manage